How To Survive as a Villain

Chapter 2: This Plot is Really Weird.


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A Tyrannical President just met a lovely and cute Shou…

His beauty makes women jealous. He has big watery eyes and bright lips. His character is naive and gentle. And he has a wicked female friend by his side.

He likes to cry, especially when the President forces himself onto him. He would cry ‘no no no’ while also not pushing back, and then he’ll cry over the loss of his own virginity. But don’t worry! Since he can somehow forgive the Tyrannical President afterwards!

Ah, that’s love, I guess.

……

This love is bullshit1!!!!!!!!!

Xiao YuAn yelled in his heart, ‘I can go to the street and find a young woman who is a hundred times better than you!!! Someone that will not make trouble! And will not cry all the time!

Faced with this kind of Shou, Xiao YuAn felt that even if he was gay, he might be scared straight.

The Xiao Family noticed this.

Wait, something isn’t right. Why don’t you even like the typical Tyrannical President’s Shou?

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Could it be!!!

Holy shit???

Is Xiao YuAn a Shou himself?

Hiss2.

The Xiao Family felt depressed, corrupted, and like they were falling into tragedy. This was beyond the Family Motto.

But it doesn’t matter, since he can’t walk the road of the ‘Tyrannical President’, they can still solve it by transforming him into the Seductive Shou President.

For example, if he meets a Mafia Boss; a tyrannical, black-bellied gangster that emits S aura everywhere.

After leaving work that day, Xiao YuAn found that his car had been damaged, and then saw that a piece of paper was stuck on the door of the car, asking him to negotiate a compensation.

Xiao YuAn dialed the man’s phone saying that it was okay and that there wasn’t a need to compensate him.

The man sneered and said: “Do you even know who I am?”

Xiao YuAn: “…”

I don’t care who the fuck you are!!! Why did you put a scratch on someone else’s car!! Is it too difficult to just apologize??!!!

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Wait, those words sound just like the quotes of a Tyrannical President!

Sensing that Xiao YuAn was silent, the man laughed and gave his name.

He turned out to be an actual Mafia Boss, the type that ignited fear by mentioning his name. He asked Xiao YuAn to come, saying that no matter how much money he asked for, he could afford it.

Xiao YuAn thought, since he didn’t have the potential of becoming a Tyrannical President himself, he might as well go and see what an actual Tyrannical Boss looks like.

So Xiao YuAn went to meet him.

However, Xiao YuAn soon realized that this guy was sick.

Because they didn’t talk about the compensation at all. They didn’t even talk much to begin with, when the Mafia Boss said that he wanted to imprison him.

Xiao YuAn said to him that he wasn’t an M, and he wasn’t interested in SM or BD.

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The Mafia Boss said that it was okay; “I will transform your body with bondage play, imprisonment play, and many other kinky things. You will fall prey to lust every day and for the rest of your life, until you became my submissive. In the end, we’ll finally fall in love. We’ll try to kill each other and being together will become complicated, forever tangled into a sadistic abusive relationship!”

Hmmm……

It sounded inspirational, but Xiao YuAn still felt that this guy had a serious problem. After all, he doesn’t suffer from Stockholm Syndrome.

This Tyrannical Boss was very bossy. Lifting up his chin and pinching his waist, saying things like he’ll tie him up and force him into imprisonment.

Then, he was beaten up by Xiao YuAn.

After all, Xiao YuAn had practiced self-defense ever since he was a child.

After the beating, Xiao YuAn felt even more nervous. He felt at a loss with his role as a “Tyrannical President”, and now his role as a “Seductive Shou President” went downhill as well.

Forget it, love affairs are way too frustrating, it’s better to just keep doing my work.

So Xiao Yuan worked diligently. Intending to be a positive figure of society, to be a good young man, an excellent member of his political Chinese party, and to serve the people for the rest of his life.

And then, he was diagnosed with a terminal illness.

Footnotes:

Footnotes

  1. 爱情个p啊; the P here stands for , a vulgar way of saying “Nonsense / Rubbish”.
  2. 嘶 sī; Sound of the air being sucked between the teeth, indicating hesitation or thinking something over.

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