Chapter 11: The case of one strange moon and two curious weasels

Dan didn't sleep at all after that, dragging out the memories of the brief interaction with Luna in front of his mind instead. The girl obviously knew he was there – even though he was invisible – but didn't react to him with fear or even a shred of apprehension. Whether she could see him in full, or simply knew of his presence, he couldn't say. But she still smiled at him, so that was a good thing. Maybe.

How she was able to do this was unknown and Dan did not really like it when there were unknowns around. He had already fallen into a world about which he knew nothing at all, so the uncertainty was enough for him for two lives and even more.

After a while, the memories of the girl turned into a more incredible direction and he almost began to believe that she knew about him all along, but Dan stopped himself in time. The thought was delusional, even apart from the fact that Luna was only twelve years old. If she knew that someone was nearby, she would try to break free more or make loud noises somehow, not succumb to the bullies.

As the sun rose on the horizon and even Mantis lifted his green tree-ass to eat… whatever he eats. Dan chose his next moves coldly and methodically. He chose to put a huge metaphorical dick on the information leak and continue living the way he lived the past week. Hidden from the world, completely alone – except for the company of Mantis and his new teachers.

He nodded to himself and sat down at a table that was perfect for his height. He still had unread books on potions and, oddly enough, math and physics. It turns out that Hogwarts provided Muggle courses for anyone who wanted to take the time to learn. True, the school only provided textbooks and tested students at the end of the year to check their knowledge, nothing more, but it was still better than nothing. Dan only found out after asking Pomona about it.

Madam Pince – the librarian of Hogwarts – duplicated modern textbooks from the best schools and universities, and then simply added them to the dark corner of the library. They were usually used for Muggle Studies so that pureblood wizards and witches would have at least a vague idea of ​​the world outside of magic. Not that they listened, of course.

Breakfast, lunch and dinner were delivered to him by invisible house elves, a race that worked for wizards for magic. The elves couldn't produce their own magic for some reason, so they had to take it from somewhere else, otherwise they would face a slow and painful death. How exactly the race that was majestically called Elves ended up in the thrall of wizards, Dan didn't know. It was disgusting on many levels, but even realizing this, no one was in a hurry to change their position. What would be the point? Elves liked to work, and wizards liked getting free labor. So the cycle continued.

And again, it wasn't his problem.

As soon as the thought flashed through Dan's head, he froze, waiting for something to suddenly appear that would make this his problem. Fortunately, nothing happened and he was left to his own devices by the universe.

After meeting Luna, Dan suddenly realized how bright the light of his clothes was sticking out in the darkness of the corridors. So, he threw off his beige sweater and pulled on a black T-shirt – a copy of the one in which he arrived in this world. It clung to his body like a glove, almost merging with the color of his skin. The pants were dark enough not to change, so Dan decided not to do anything about them for now.

"Why would anyone need a forgetfulness potion? Is it some sort of PTSD suppressor?" He muttered and continued to read, but there were no application examples in the book, just a description of how the potion should work.

Making a note to learn about the various non-obvious uses for potions, Dan continued reading, only getting distracted when Mantis pointed at something in the window. Below, students of all shapes and sizes walked around Hogwarts, and sometimes Hagrid walked near the forest.

Dan quickly became friends with Hagrid, partly because the giant man was interested in what Enderman was and partly because they were both interested in magical animals. The professor said he had third-year students tend to Flobberworms — or whatever those pathetic worms were called – but Dan suggested to take enough interesting and safe creatures to study in class. It wasn't hard to get some Fairies and Puffskeins for the students, after all.

Closing the book sharply and placing it on the table, Dan got up from his chair and started wandering around his room/apartment. His mind started to wander again; it wasn't good. For the past couple of days, he simply couldn't stay still and knew very well the reason why. Even as an introvert, Dan often interacted with all sorts of different people on the Internet, whether they were his friends or customers. Now without any access to that, his main contact with the world and other people was cut off. And not that he could walk up to a random student and start a conversation. 'Oh, hello, I'm the school's secret monster that all the teachers hide! I'm even worse than the creatures from the Forbidden Forest, you see! Would you like to talk about the secrets of the universe and the possibility of deeper plans of reality existing?' Not gonna work.

"Fuck me," he groaned, "even a pen-pal would've been nice."

Fortunately – or unfortunately – for Dan, just at that moment there was a knock on his door. He stopped his whining and looked towards the door and then out the window. "It's still dark outside… Hm," walking closer to the door, he stopped and listened. With only an enchanted piece of canvas separating you from the hallway, hearing what's going on outside is pretty easy.

"– didn't know this room could be opened." Someone whispered.

'Male voice, young. A student and most likely not alone. What are they doing here?' Dan thought.

"Me too! One day, it just appeared on the map with a password in a strange language," the voice answered… to itself?

'Is he insane?' Dan stared at the back of the painting without even blinking.

"Oh, my less than handsome brother, can you think of the possibilities? If it's as good as I think it is, we might've found ourselves a new lab!"

Dan finally blinked. That there were a couple of brothers outside the door was much more likely than a madman roaming the corridors of Hogwarts. 'Like that would ever happen.' He didn't think that insane underage magicians were allowed to study alongside normal wizards. 'A normal wizard. Sounds a bit wrong.'

At least in Dan's eyes it seemed logical. He was new here; he could be forgiven for his silly thoughts.

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"Maybe we should look at the map again?" Brother number two suggested. "Even if it's in an ancient language, we can try to understand it. How hard can that be?"

What the brothers didn't know was that the password was spoken in a language that required perfectly clear intonation in order to pronounce the words. When your language only has five consonants – six on a good day – intonation and even speed of pronunciation is extremely important. Endermen's language was brutally unfriendly towards newcomers.

"Won't hurt to try." Brother number one spoke and Dan heard the rustle of parchment. The rustling of a fairly large piece of parchment.

Dan leaned against the wall and put his hand on the handle that was located on the inside of the picture frame. He had a bad feeling about this. These two brothers didn't come here by accident, they came here with a purpose in mind, and apparently, they didn't intend to leave without success. It was bad, but not fatal. Why, Dan knew a great candidate who could help him right now!

'Hm, this time I can't bother Flitwick, his hands were already full with his students. Maybe Filch? Pomona? No, showing up in the room of a woman you barely know at night is not very polite,' Dan thought.

"Gred…? Do you see the same thing as me?" Brother two asked.

"Indeed, I do, Forge. There's someone behind the door– hey, isn't that Bulgarian? Is there any students from Bulgaria in Hogwarts?" Gred asked.

Dan was confused, he had no idea what they were talking about. Usually, students from Bulgaria went to study at Durmstrang or other schools closer to home, but as far as Dan knew, there were no Bulgarians at Hogwarts. 'Wait– oh, for fucks sake.'

"No… It's Russian? I don't know Russian." The brothers were silent for a couple of minutes. "Hey Gred, you know what I just thought?"

"What?"

"He's… Just standing there. Not moving. Right behind the door." Forge said slowly, choosing each word carefully.

Dan gripped the doorknob tighter, ready to rip the painting out if need be. Graham might never forgive him for being such a bastard towards his portrait, but Dan didn't consider the opinions of dead people he didn't know personally important. He's only been here for a little over a week, but Luna and those two idiots noticed his existence!

"Can he hear us?!" Gred hissed and Dan heard the parchment rustle again. "Let's get out of here, if he calls the teachers, we'll be in big trouble."

'Shit.' Dan couldn't just let them go. Of course, he could wait until morning and tell the Professors that he was compromised not only by Luna Lovegood, but also by two brothers whose real names he doesn't even know. Dan had no idea who they would start telling about his existence in the secret room at the school, and he wasn't about to take the risk. It was easier to deal with the problem right now.

"Oh, you ain't leavin'." He muttered and yanked the door open, teleporting behind the brothers at the same time.

Sir Graham was eerily silent, as if the rough swing was nothing to him. Dan didn't know if people on paintings could feel the tapestry move, so he pushed the thought for later review. The two boys, about fifteen years old, stood stock-still, just staring at the now-open door in shock. In the darkness of the corridor, it was difficult to see their appearance, but their fiery red hair and identical appearance was clear evidence that they were twins. Dan didn't have much time to look at the two teenagers, so he had to work fast.

He pushed them roughly through his door and stepped inside, slamming the portrait behind him. The twins reacted quickly as well, pulling out their wands and turning towards Dan, only to freeze in horror.

"W-what are you?" The one who Dan assumed was Forge asked, gripping his wand hard, ready to defend or attack at moment's notice.

Dan would've raised an eyebrow if he still had any. They were brothers from Gryffindor, which didn't really surprise him, what did though, was the clearly fake fear in their eyes. They believed that they could leave unharmed, which was right, but highly illogical on their part.

"First, one Ravenclaw, then two Gryffindors, what's next? Three Hufflepuffs and four Slytherins? I've had enough fun for the night," he muttered. "Alright, gents, what, in the name of sanity, are you two doing here?"

The twins shared a look and with perfect synch started casting spells.

Dan just wanted the day to end already.