Chapter 2: Meet the Team

She opens the door and the room is big. It goes back a lot farther than it extends to the sides — I imagine it only goes about 9 meters from one side to the other, judging by the spacing of the doors, and at least 30 meters deep — and it’s full of training equipment. The entire western wall is one long mirror, actually a single continuous piece and not multiple smaller sections. The floor is gray and slightly springy, and the walls that aren’t covered by the mirror are a gentle gray, reminiscent of seal skin. Is this a gym? Who are we meeting in a gym?
I can hear metal clanking together from somewhere in the room, loud and sharp and uncomfortable to listen to. Do I have an audio sensitivity slider?

“Andrew! Mac! He’s awake!” Rachel yells into the room. Her voice echoes off the walls slightly. It takes a moment, but the clanking stops, and two people come into view — a shorter man with olive skin, a full beard and jet black hair wearing a tank top and shorts, and a boy about my height — an inch or two over six feet, I’d imagine — with skin the color of terracotta and eyes the color of ocean water wearing a bright green hoodie and jeans. He’s pretty, I think as I look at the boy with terracotta skin.

“About time.” The boy grumbles. “I’ve spent more time spotting Andrew today than I ever want to again.”

“I’m sorry my health and wellness has caused you so much grief.” Andrew smiles, sarcasm dripping off of his words. “Listen, you didn’t have to spot me, you could’ve waited off to the side.”

“And feel guilty forever when the barbell crushes your windpipe and kills you? No thanks.” He shakes his head, then looks over at me and narrows his eyes a little. “So you’re the new Variant.”

“Y…yes?” What the hell is a “variant”?

He blinks his eyes at me a few times, a look of confusion settling on his features. He looks at Rachel, then back at me, then back at Rachel. “Is he…?”

“He seems to be sentient.” She confirms.

“Shi-hit.” He half-laughs. “When did we figure that out? Wow, that’s… wow.”

Andrew looks unsure. “We’re sure he’s… docile?” Rachel shoots a glare his way. “What? We don’t know what effects this entire process has on a sentient human brain, Rachel!”

“If he were hostile, I wouldn’t have walked him over here.” She rolls her eyes, gesturing wildly at me. “Does this look like a hostile person to you? There’s tears in his eyes, Andrew!”

“Hey!” I whine, wiping my face with my arm. God, I’m acting so pathetic right now. I probably look pathetic, too.

“Did you figure out how to disable the prompt windows?” Mac inquires, sort of sidestepping his way over to me. “Those seemed annoying as hell when we were running VR simulations to test how they worked.”

“Y-yeah. That was one of the first things I asked about.” I reply hesitantly. What is his angle? He acted so cold at first but now he almost seems friendly.

“Mac, leave him be. He’s probably overwhelmed already.” Rachel scolds the boy. He shoots her a glare and goes to sit on a rowing machine, seated backwards facing us. She turns to face me and gives me a sort of half-smile that doesn't quite reach her eyes. "This is the gym. You're free to use the space whenever you have down time, which will probably be most of the time."

"What will I be doing when I don't have free time?" I ask. Are these people part of some corrupt future government? Am I a tool for some dictator's evil ambitions? That would actually be kind of cool… wait, no, that's only in video games. That kind of stuff is bad in real life.
"We mostly need to check your cognitive functioning." Andrew responds. "Other than that, we need to assess how much of Matthew’s memory you retained.”

I remember enough. I remember too much. I remember his friends, the people he loved, the classes he liked in school… the people that wanted him dead… the last time he saw anyone he cared about…

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Fuck, I'm crying again. This is not the first impression I wanted to have.

"We're… sure that the Cortex is the only thing we changed with this one?" Mac gives me a look somewhere between concern and disappointment. Rachel lets out a deep sigh and shakes her head a little.

"The last ones didn't have to worry about processing what they remembered." She reminds him. "He, however, has to work through all of it with human emotions. We're in uncharted water right now."

Talking about me like I'm not even here. Or like I'm a lab experiment. I guess I kind of am a lab experiment though, aren't I? A fucked up reconstruction of a long-dead man. A man who was too good for the life he had to live. A man I'll never be able to live up to. A man these people expect me to be… or at least to imitate.

"We don't have time to let him feel sorry for himself, Rachel. We need him ready by the end of the month!"

"Yes, we need him ready. And part of having him ready is making sure he's mentally sound." She points at me. "Does this man seem mentally sound to you?"

Can I just disappear? Go back to whatever great beyond I was in before me and after Matt? I hate having his memories in my head. I hate being a jumping off point from another person. Why did I have to be what resulted from this fucked up science experiment?

"Guys?" Mac speaks up. "He looks like he's going to be sick."

Andrew and Rachel look over at me, and Andrew retorts "Going to be? He already looks sick! God… let's just get him to his room. I'm not dealing with this right now."

Rachel looks into my eyes. I look away. She touches my arm to start guiding me toward the door. The sensation is overwhelming and every little sound is pinging around in my head, but I know better than to bring attention to it. Matt dealt with more intense situations than this with sensory overload, I know I have the capacity to ignore it, and it's nothing but a disruption to tell anyone.
Rachel guides me down the hall, and my subconscious screams at me that I need to calm down, but I ignore it. I want to be upset. I want to feel out of control. I want to feel too much and not enough all at once.

I barely even register when we stop moving, and I realize I've managed to zone out for the entire duration of our walk. How long were we even walking? It couldn't have been longer than a couple minutes. My head hurts, but I ground myself and look at Rachel as she talks."Training starts at 6AM. You'll eat after your first training session. You will always have a break from noon to 3 for lunch and recreation, and dinner is at 6 PM. The rest of that time will usually be yours, but you may also have training sessions. You need to be back in your room by lockdown at 10PM, otherwise you'll be trapped in whatever room you're in for the rest of the night. Any questions?"

I shake my head, looking anxiously between the door and her. The door itself is grey like all of the other doors here, but there's a name plate next to it that simply reads "72".

"Alright, then I can leave you here for the night. Maybe take some time to become accustomed to the Cortex interface, it's important for the work you'll be doing."

I nod along, more to get this interaction over with than anything. I don't think any words would come out of my mouth if I tried to speak, anyways. She starts to walk back down the hallway, and I take that as a cue that I can go into my room. I practically push the door down with how forcefully I open it, still careful not to let the door hit the wall. I slam the door behind me and fall onto the bed in the far corner, not caring to look at the rest of the room right now. I cover myself in the blankets and put the pillow over my head and finally let sobs wrack my body.

I already hate my life.

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