Chapter 13: 13. Singing

Borat Zach is the Deputy Minister of the Ministry of Architecture Academic Sub-Directory.

Entering the Ministry of Architecture Academic Sub-Directory buildings everyday; he can only sigh - thinking of the work ahead.

 

While Borat Zach is the Deputy Minister; he basically does all the work within the Academic Sub-Directory.

The current Minister dispatched to the Ministry of Architecture Academic Sub-Directory is plain incompetent and plays around during work-times.

Therefore; most employees just go straight up to the Borat Zach instead of the Minister for administrative decisions.

In simple words, the Deputy-Minister is doing the work of the Minister.

It is not an exaggeration to say that Borat Zach is one of the most overworked individuals within the Academy. (Roan Ludwer is first place.)

Borat; opening the window of his office, takes out a cigar and lights it.

"Whew.."

'Fuck my life.'

Feeling the perfect weather breeze across his skin; he fantasizes.

Now, you may ask.

What does a Rank 2 Civil Servant, with a stable and decent paying job, happy family, fantasize about?

 

Being rich? Covered with wealth?

Being surrounded by a harem of beautiful women?

Having supernatural powers?

 

Nope.

Borat Zach, for the 5012th time; during his service as a Deputy Minister, fantasizes about one thing.

 

To go up to the Minister, and punch him in the face -

With a big, fat, resignation notice; 

and throwing all kinds of swear words at his single superior.

 

Borat replays this thought more than 5 times a day - and he's happy every time thinking about it.

However, there is a reason he fantasizes about it.

 

He has to provide for his family.

Borat, as mentioned above, is a family man.

He needs to bring home the paycheck every month.

However,

'One day..'

One day, Borat Zach won't have to fantasize about his dreams anymore.

As Borat Zach gets his daily dose of dopamine from his imagination; 

 

He hears something from the hallways of the Ministry of Architecture Academic Sub-Directory building.

'The national anthem?'

From a distance; he hears 2 men, with off-tones, singing the national anthem of the Empire.

'...'

Borat Zach; who was forced to remember and sing the national anthem by heart from his Civil Servant training course; was flabbergasted.

Who dares sing the national anthem this badly?

This is simply disrespecting the Empire's integrity!

Borat Zach, feeling offended by the very shitty remix (?) of the national anthem, bursts in rage. (He's pretty patriotic)

Borat Zach heads out of his office to reprimand the singers for tampering the glorious national anthem.

'The 3rd Directory Office?'

The sounds were coming from the 3rd Directory Office.

Quite unusual.. but Borat Zach was covered with rage - he didn't have time to think about it.

Kicking the office door, he shouts.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU FUCKERS ARE SINGING!?"

Inside, he sees 2 of his employees, in a front lean rest position - with a man with a neat black uniform on standing in front of them.

?

'Black uniform..?'

The only department with a black uniform, is the Inspectorate Office.

That's weird.

'Inspectorate Office..?'

Confused, Borat quickly moves his eyes around the room; or specifically; the man in the black uniform.

On the uniform, he sees a rank insiginia.

'Minister..?'

That's weird.

As Borat's brain starts working; he spits out a simple equation.

 

Black uniform + Inspectorate Office + Minister rank = Roan Ludwer.

'Fuck.'

Fuck.

"..."

"..."

"GLORY TO THE EMPIRE!!"

 

***

As soon as I forced the 2 sleeping beauties to start singing, I realized my mistake.

They are absolutely horrendous at singing!

My ears were dying, and I wanted to kill myself.

But - I couldn't back down! I still have my pride as a Minister!

"LOUDER!!!!"

And so, the 2 sleeping beauties sang louder.

'Shit...'

Suddenly, someone burst in.

"WHICH ONE OF YOU FUCKERS ARE SINGING!?"

Understandable reaction.

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These dudes really suck at singing.

Looking at the face of the person who burst in, I saw his face of confusion.

Then, his eyes exploded in surprise.

Suddenly, the person that burst in shouted.

"GLORY TO THE EMPIRE!!"

Geez.

I get it.

"Glory."

I replied non-chalantly.

Looking at the person who burst in, I looked at his uniform.

Deputy Minister, eh?

I might have to explain the situation.

"I'm here due to some inconsistencies within some documents from the 3rd Directory Office."

"Inconsistencies?"

"Yes. Take a look for yourself."

I handed the documents over to the Deputy Minister.

"..."

"Wow."

The Deputy Minister; as if not being able to believe that shit like this was happening under his nose; adjusted his glasses.

Then, he took a look at the two 3rd Directory employees.

"...Explain yourself."

Woah.

He looks fuckin' scary. 

Reminds me of when I asked the President of Finance for a temporary leave.

However; the supervisor of the 3rd Directory Office, Ben Pedro replied back - fighting the Deputy Minister's deathly stare.

"We mistyped a few numbers."

'That shit won't pass.'

As the Deputy Minister was about to reply with a wrinkled face, I replied.

"..Mistyped? Then how come the state of the roads between Precinct 23A and 23B are so shitty?"

Ben Pedro - still making up shit, said,

"The maintenance team... uh... went on a strike?"

The maintenance teams within the Academy only maintain roads for directories that have paid for their upkeeping; and that fee is paid by the budget.  - Similar to a voucher that is in-place for  a systematic request.

There is no reason for the maintenance team to go on a strike.. unless they don't pay the upkeeping fee.

"So.. you didn't pay the voucher fee for maintenance."

"..."

"Where'd the maintenance voucher fee go then?"

A silence ensued.

Ben Pedro - along with his subordinate, seemed to be getting ready for something.

They took a deep breath, and I readied myself for some action.

However, it wasn't what I expected.

He started rapping like crazy.

"SirMyDaughterWasVerySickAndINeededToPayForHerHospitalFeesButMySalaryCouldn'tCutItSoIHadToUseSomeMoneyFromTheBudgetIKnowIDidn'tReceivePermissionButIReallyNeededToSeeMyDaughterLiveAGoodAndHappyLif-"

'Man - this shit's annoying."

"Shut the fuck up."

"..?"

"Is your hospital fee 72 Million Cromwells?"

Ben Pedro, seemingly forgetting that there was 72 Million Cromwells missing from the finance documents, stopped.

That's the problem.

Most embezzlers forget how much money they embezzle - because they don't care.

It might be obvious for some people. How do you forget the state funds you embezzled?

It's easily forgettable after you buy a few houses, some land, some luxury brands, etc.

It becomes natural for you. Sort of like how you breathe naturally.

"You are both under arrest for blatant embezzlement of the funds of the Empire. You will be more extensively investigated after being handed to proper authorities."

I took out 2 cuffs from my coat, and motioned the Deputy Minister to detain the subordinate with one of the cuffs.

I myself took down Ben Pedro after kicking him in the knees in a swift motion and cuffed him because he was offering a bit of resistance.

The subordinate just complied with the Deputy Minister."

As I looked around, I saw that the receptionist who lead my way was in the room due to the commotion.

"Get the Academy Security team."

"Got it."

Without much questions, the Receptionist started running.

"You think you have the right to detain me? I'm the 13th son of a Marquess!!"

Ben Pedro, who was a bit silent up till now, started breaking down after he saw that the situation would ruin his life. (And neck)

But 13th son?? Damn. The Marquess in question sure had a shit ton of happy times.

But after the number 3, being a son of a highly noble family doesn't bring that much benefits.

"Really?"

"Yeah!"

"Don't give a shit."

I then knocked Ben Pedro out with a quick punch to his chin.

The Deputy Minister, who was anchoring his knees onto Menslow Mane, Ben Pedro's subordinate, looked at me as if I was crazy.

But what can I say?

Working for the government does wonders.

Especially working for the Inspectorate Office.

 

---

note: this is the rank structure of the government

 

 

 

 

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