Chapter 60: 59

“Please don’t get me wrong, madam. That doesn’t mean I’m trying to blame them. They were all very nice people before I met them. ……It was me who made them like that. Wearing this mask was actually the advice of Duke Alberton. He said that my face and Odd Eye have a curse that incites a lady’s greed. He said that in the future, Leon also would grow up and become like me.”

Grace bit her lower lip at the name of her father, Duke Alberton, mentioned again in Arthur’s mouth.

‘Again that man, father’s name.’

To what extent did that person deeply involved in this matter? Grace called his name looking at him with eyes full of complicated resentment towards her father and sorrow for Arthur.

“… … Arthur.”

“So, to be honest, I’m a little scared. I’m afraid that the curse on this face will hurt my wife too.”

“… … Aren’t you afraid, like with other young girls, that I might endanger your life just because you looked elsewhere and smiled at Leon?”

Arthur shook his head firmly and answered Grace’s question.

“I am not at all afraid of getting hurt or dying at the hands of my wife.”

“Are you sure?”

“What I fear most is that my wife does not love me and that you’re afraid of me.”

As Arthur answered, a tear fell under the mask.

Until now, he has seen countless times that humans relentlessly throw away things like love for the sake of intense greed. He has witnessed countless disgusting things such as a lord who sacrificed all his beloved daughters to an old 90-year-old king for power or selling his beautiful wife to a wealthy imperial family to pay off his debts from the war.

In the face of intense greed, love collapses endlessly.

Arthur was afraid that Grace would also lose to such greed. Or in order not to lose to that greed, in order not to go crazy, he was afraid she would stay away from him.

So, even when he first confessed his love to her with greed, he didn’t take off his mask cowardly. Because he wanted her to love his weak self first, who was completely trapped in this shell.

Arthur shed tears from his other eye too and spoke to her as if confessing.

“……I’m a coward. I’m a coward, but I’m greedy as well.”

“……Arthur.”

“Honestly, I wasn’t confident. No, I think it would be right to say that I didn’t fully trust you even though I loved you. It was because I knew well what it was like to own and have a person like a jewel. ………The moment I saw your portrait sent by the Alberton family, I broke my decision not to get married again and became greedy.”

Grace, who was listening to Arthur, felt her heart pounding uncontrollably at the situation.

She knew that Arthur had also accepted this marriage under the emperor’s power, but she didn’t know there would be such a situation. Grace smiled softly at Arthur, who bowed his head in front of her and let go of her hand. Arthur gently resisted as if he wouldn’t let go, but Grace relentlessly pulled out her hand.

After that, Arthur’s shoulders, which were enough to be twice as wide as her own, drooped blatantly. Seeing that, Grace swallowed a laugh, lifted Arthur’s chin with both hands, made eye contact, and spoke brightly.

“It’s okay. Arthur. I’m not a perfect person either. Everyone is cowardly, there’s a part of you where you’re a coward, right? So do I.”

“…….Madam.”

“You said it so solemnly. But is that what you were hiding? So there’s nothing more you have to hide from me?”

“……That’s right. Now, really, there is nothing hidden in front of you.”

“……I see.”

Grace also decided firmly as she saw Arthur waiting earnestly for his disposition, telling her all the secrets he had.

If this person has revealed all of his weaknesses, then she can tell him the biggest “secret” she has.

‘Actually, I’m a little afraid, but I still have to be brave for this person who gave me courage.’

Grace said, moistening her dry lips.

“Then I’ll tell you about one secret that I’ve been hiding from you all this time.”

“What is it?”

“…..So, actually. ……I died once.”

“… … What? What are you talking about? My wife died once?”

Arthur held her shoulder tightly with a surprised face at Grace’s shocking confession.

Grace smiled softly at Arthur’s continued gaze, holding her shoulders tightly.

“… … I know you can’t believe it. It would be hard to believe. But, it’s true.”

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“… … How… … .”

“I don’t know either. Well, before I die, I’ll call it my first life. At that time, I hated marrying you more than dying. So, I refused to marry you, which was recommended by His Majesty and my family and went into a monastery recklessly. I’d rather be a new priest than marry you.”

“… … Did you?”

“Sorry. Are you upset?”

“……No, I understand. You wouldn’t have wanted to marry a monster like me.”

At Grace’s confession, Arthur looked down again with a timid look. Thinking it was cute because it looked like Leon when he was scolded, Grace gently brushed Arthur’s cheek with her fingers and said.

“If I had known you were such a person back then, I wouldn’t have done it, but I just thought I didn’t want to die then. No wonder, for me, my life as Grace Alberton has been a series of terrible days that felt like death every day. I’ve lived my whole life like that, and all I felt was that I couldn’t die in vain by marrying the rumoured ‘monster duke’.”

“… … So, you went into the monastery to avoid marrying me, but somehow……. Is that what happened?”

Arthur asked back as if he didn’t even want to use the word “death” on her.

Grace replied with more courage at Arthur’s sweet and full of love words.

“My mother, Duchess Alberton, sent me a poisoned birthday cake.”

“Did my wife eat that?”

“Yes. It was the first ‘birthday cake’ I’ve ever received in my life. Now that I think about it, won’t the mother would be the one to send such a thing to me who was so stubborn about not wanting to marry you. But back then I was just as happy as a fool that my mother did something to me for the first time. So I pushed it into my mouth without any doubt, and I died.”

“…… Why on earth did Duchess Alberton send such a hideous thing to you?”

“I think it was probably because I have turned into a hindrance. She must have been concerned that the Alberton family would fall out of His Majesty’s eyes because I had dared to disobey His Majesty’s orders. … … If only I disappear in that situation, it would be good to make excuses to His Majesty in many ways.”

Grace deliberately spoke lightly as if nothing had happened, but Arthur’s expression when he heard it was severely distorted.

Then Arthur looked at Grace with eyes gleaming with guilt and remorse.

“I’m sorry, madam. If I hadn’t accepted His Majesty’s request at that time, my wife wouldn’t have been poisoned.….”

“Why are you apologizing? It was Duke Alberton and his people who drove me to death. And they were the ones who would mercilessly get rid of me whenever the value of my use disappeared. For Duke Alberton, my presence is not of a family, but a good hand for a ‘political marriage’. It was nothing more than that.”

Grace comforted Arthur, who apologized again, in soft words. Arthur said, feeling sorry for Grace’s calm confession of situations that would have been extremely painful for her.

“… … Wasn’t it painful?”

“It was painful. It was in vain. I felt so sorry for myself that I was dying alone, vomiting blood alone in a narrow and cornered monastery room, and I dared to resent the god who designed my destiny like this way.…… So as I was dying, I prayed hard. At any cost, rescue me from this terrible death. But no one seemed to hear that prayer, and I lost my breath as it was. ……I thought so.”

“… … ?”

“I woke up, and when I opened my eyes, to my surprise, I was back to where I was before I refused to marry you.”

Grace continued to talk, recalling the moment that still felt like a dream.

“I couldn’t believe it at first. It felt like I was dreaming. Then, the moment I realized that coming back alive was the reality, the first thing I did was to accept the marriage with you.”

“……Accepting marriage with me would also not have been a very good choice for you, my wife.”

“But rather than refusing to get married again and dying in vain as in the first life. Well, I’m sorry. Rather, I planned to be the wife of the cursed Duke and buy some time. And… … . Umm, I’m sorry to you.”

“It’s okay. Please tell me.”

“… … To be honest, I tried to escape using your curse. ‘A woman who has a relationship with Duke Felix must die or go crazy within a year’. So I tried to run away from you by playing crazy woman before I die. I tried to act like the crazy princesses in all legends, where they let their hair loose, put on a torn dress, and disappeared into a snowfield of winter without fear or voluntarily walked into a dangerous forest.”

“…….”

“I tried to ran away like that, hid in moderation from people who came to find me, and when the world forgets me, I secretly run away to a foreign country where there is no ‘Alberton’ or ‘Felix’ and live as a woman named ‘Grace’. So I always took a walk around Felix Castle without you knowing, looking for opportunities. Searching where should I run to… … Honestly, if I hadn’t met Leon on my first walk. And if you hadn’t come to get me that night, I’d probably have carried out the plan.”

Just a few months ago, the plans that she had sincerely tried, Grace told Arthur everything.

Arthur listened to her words with a calm expression. Grace read the calm submission in Arthur’s eyes.

She was convinced that if she had told him all her plans honestly at the time, he would have given her a new identity and a horse that could run hundreds of miles for her.

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And perhaps even now, Grace could see that if she really wanted it, he would cry and beg, but eventually, he would let her go.

Just as expected.

Arthur said, staring at Grace with dark shadowed eyes.

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