“…” I stared at the floor while sitting on a damaged sofa. I didn’t move an inch, and Hyehyun also seemed to have given up getting out of this room. He stared at me for a while then sighed. I think he might have said that we should just rest since I was tired.
I didn’t know where he found them, but he lit up a couple of half-melted candles. He dropped some wax on the side table next to me and fixed the candle there. The wick was so old that the flame went out quickly despite attempting to light it with a lighter several times. After a few tries, he lit up two candles.
It seemed like he brought the candles to save his flashlight battery. The candles flickered precariously before they found steadiness. Only then did Hyehyun turn his flashlight off. Another kind of light filled the room. It was a warm light that danced with the breeze.
In contrast, the shadows of people grew cold.
Hyehyun handed me a chocolate bar. He said that he brought it from the kitchen.
“Aren’t you hungry?” he asked, but the emptiness in my heart was vaster and more glaring than that of my stomach. I didn’t think I could stomach anything, so I refused. Hyehyun shrugged and shoved the chocolate back in his pocket. He found a place to sit across from me.
I had thought that we had gone a fair way down, but that seemed to be my mistake. The room we were in was small and filled with common items, so it was hard to tell which floor we were on. I only realized that it was the grocery store floor after Hyehyun said that he found a room with a bunch of fruits piled up but realized they were all fake.
The stairway that Raehee and I were in made us take the long way around, which I didn’t realize at the time.
I glanced at the spot that Hyehyun covered with dry items of clothing. Raehee’s hand was under that pile. Hyehyun said that he didn’t want to see the puddle of blood or the hand, so he piled up the nearby clothing on top of it. The mountain of clothes looked like a small grave for a doll.
I bit my lip hard.
“Run! Keep looking straight ahead! Hurry!” Raehee’s last words echoed in my head again. Miserable, I buried my head in my hands. I repressed the groan that tried to leak out, but I couldn’t do the same for my tears. A teardrop rolled down my cheek, and I gripped the cheek where it made its path with my fingers. I felt my guilt suffocating me.
“…Haeseo.” Hyehyun, who was watching me closely, approached me. He squatted down between me and Raehee’s hand, so I couldn’t see it any longer. He patted my back. “Don’t be so sad. You had only known her for two days. Rather than that, I’m glad that you’re safe. You’re not hurt anywhere, right?”
‘Damn it.’ I clenched my jaws at the words he called comfort.
I heard that anger and exasperation helped one forget the grief—it was indeed correct. I squeezed my eyes shut before opening them again. It was to shed the last of the tears that had welled up in my eyes. I wiped off the droplets that clung to my chin, and my indifferent eyes swept the floor.
Shadows from the candlelight danced on the floor which was covered with a blanket of dust. I felt irked by Hyehyun’s hands that kept touching my back. What angered me was that he was partially right. There was something more important to me than being sad. I still had things to ask. “…What about Hawoo?”
“Who knows?” Hyehyun hummed and pretended to think, rapping his fingers on my back. The places where his finger hit depressed slightly. It felt like a hermit crab with long legs was clinging onto my back.
“What about Seohang?”
“I lost him while we were searching for Hawoo Kang. I was alone before I knew it. He’s bound to be somewhere though, don’t you think?” He chuckled and added, “I was anxious being all alone, but I’m glad I found you. How did you come out from there?”
He didn’t ask why Raehee died. It didn’t seem like he avoided the question because he thought I was not in any condition to talk about Raehee. He just seemed disinterested. That secret passageway was unusable because the stairs were damaged. That was good enough for him.
What was the point of remembering and being miserable about a dead person from a bygone time? That was how he seemed to pass it off.
Hyehyun left the most messages on my phone after Yeonseon died. “It’s too bad for the dead, but Haeseo, you’re still alive. So, let’s meet up sometime. I’m worried about you.” The texts were noble, pure, and dutiful at first glance, but the hidden meaning was disgusting.
“…You didn’t see anything in the hallway?” I asked, turning to look at him. He didn’t seem to understand my question and tilted his head. Seeing that reaction, he must not have seen what Raehee and I had seen just yet. I remembered that Seogeung called me a “lucky b*stard” before he died. Who was the real lucky b*stard here?