Chapter 202: 202

Chapter 202 Two men and a dog

 

There was now such a small thing in the family, and they were both unaccustomed to it. They liked it, but a puppy isn't a human, and it needed to be trained.

 

Tian Yuan was busy, but Pan Lei appeared to have become much more leisurely once his military rank was raised. At the very least, he no longer had to rush back to the army. He'd been with Tian Yuan for more than ten days this time. Tian Yuan enjoyed receiving a good morning kiss as soon as he opened his eyes, and then acted coquettishly by asking Pan Lei to carry himself to the toilet to freshen up before savagely tossing Pan Lei out when Pan Lei sought to do him.

 

Pan Lei also began a major project: dog training.

 

He used to go to the training grounds to observe the dog handlers teach Black Lady and other puppies when he was in the army. He immediately applied all of his knowledge to Jindou'er.

 

On the first day, he instructed Jindou'er not to urinate or defecate anywhere it pleased, as well as not to piss on their slippers.

 

Tian Yuan snacked on fruits after dinner. He was accustomed to sitting cross-legged on the sofa, eating fruits while watching TV and relaxing peacefully. Jindou'er enjoyed following Pan Lei. Pan Lei was mopping the floor, so it chased the mop. When it got tired of playing, it trotted over, searched around, and finally located a decent spot, which was Tian Yuan's slippers, and then peed on the slippers.

 

Tian Yuan was completely unaware. He was engrossed watching TV and laughing as he rocked back and forth. It was Guo Degang’s[1] crosstalk show, and he was telling the story of how six popcorn machines rang together and shattered his house's glass. Tian Yuan laughed and smacked his thigh.

 

Pan Lei arrived at his side, bit an orange segment from Tian Yuan's fingers, laughed with him, held the puppy and placed it on the sofa, and continued to mop the floor.

 

He then proceeded to clean the mop. Tian Yuan wanted to put on his shoes to throw out the trash, but when he stretched his feet, they landed in a puddle of chilly urine-smelling water.

 

Every doctor is, to some extent, obsessed with cleanliness. Tian Yuan jumped and flung his feet like crazy just thinking about having stepped on dog urine.

 

"Pan Lei, Pan Lei, hurry up! Bring me a basin of water quickly! This little ba$tard pissed on my slippers, and now my feet are covered in dog pee! It’s revolting!"

 

Pan Lei dashed over with a basin of water and supported him with his hand.

 

"Watch it! Don't trip. Sit down, sit down. I'll wash them for you."

 

Tian Yuan swiftly removed his socks. Pan Lei drew Jindou'er over and whacked its buttocks a few times. A puppy must be spanked in order to learn its lesson. However, it is not abuse. You cannot slap the dog so hard that it collapses and is unable to get up. Pan Lei lightly hit it before grabbing it by the scruff of its neck and bringing it up to his eye level.

 

"You are not allowed to pee wherever you like. Isn't there cat litter in the toilet? That's your potty. If you do this again, there will be no food for you."

 

Tian Yuan remained queasy and scrubbed his feet frantically. He had goosebumps because it felt so strange. Tian Yuan hastily held Jindou'er in his arms after seeing Pan Lei spank the puppy and flick its nose, causing Jindou'er to whimper pitifully.

 

"Don't bully him."

 

Tian Yuan scratched its chin. Even if it had done something bad, it was still their dog son, and he was reluctant to punish it.

 

Pan Lei squatted at his feet, carefully rubbed them, took out the soap, washed them three times, drew them up, and sniffed them.

 

"They don’t smell. Do you want to check?"

 

Tin Yuan's feet were wiped clean by Pan Lei. He didn't mix up the face towel and the foot towel this time, or Tian Yuan would have kicked him in the face. He would have been cursed and thrown out.

 

Pan Lei kissed his instep while holding his ankle.

 

"Would you like to go for a walk? Take a stroll while conveniently walking the dog?"

 

Pan Lei kissed Tian Yuan on the lips after he nodded. Then two men and a dog went for a walk together. Going for a walk with the dog... This kind of simple life was ordinary, warm, and full of exquisite tenderness.

 

It was everyday trivia, yet this was life.

 

This was the most normal, practical, and steady way of life for them now that they lived together.

 

It seemed like any other couple bringing their kid for a walk after supper. They had eaten enough and headed down to walk the dog together.

 

Pan Lei went in search of Tian Yuan's socks. They didn't collar Jindou'er and tie a rope around its neck to pull it since they thought it was still young and unlikely to hurt anyone.

 

Pan Lei took Tian Yuan's hand and headed downstairs after closing the door. Jindou'er dashed ahead, gingerly making its way down. Before climbing down, it probed each step with its front paws. Jindou'er's steps were unhurried, as were theirs.

 

Jindou'er had a good time when they arrived downstairs, completely letting loose.

 

Pan Lei also brought a Frisbee from home, which he had purchased as a gift for Jindou'er.

 

Pan Lei tossed the Frisbee, and Jindou'er dashed for it. The poor animal was too young to deal with human pranks. Tian Yuan grabbed the Frisbee and tossed it to Pan Lei. Jindou'er simply raced between the two of them, chasing the Frisbee. It began panting in exhaustion after a few times of dashing back and forth.

 

Tian Yuan burst out laughing and bowed, his hands on his thighs. Poor Jindou'er didn't even get to hold the Frisbee once. Maybe it was tired, maybe it was angry. It simply landed on its stomach in the midst of the playground, directly in the center of the two men, and refused to get up no matter what they said.

 

It resentfully lifted its eyes to gaze at its Little Dad, then at its Dad, and stretched out its limbs with its stomach and chin on the ground, unwilling to get up.

 

Tian Yuan laughed so hard that tears welled up in his eyes. He'd never seen a dog so cutely haughty.

 

Pan Lei knelt alongside it to talk to it.

 

"Not cool, son, not cool. You shouldn’t imitate your Little Dad. He is simply lazy and doesn't exercise. Look at his small physique! You must get up and exercise in order to protect your Little Dad in the future. I'll kick you out if you get too fat."

 

Jindou'er turned its head away, not sparing Pan Lei a glance. This action was also learned from Tian Yuan. Tian Yuan turned away and scoffed dismissively whenever Pan Lei provoked him.

 

"I'll buy you ice cream."

 

The little ears moved, and it finally looked at its Dad with longing in its eyes.

 

"You little chowhound."

 

Pan Lei stood up, helplessly flicking its nose. Jindou'er sat up as well, its small tail wagging madly and barking loudly.

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"Okay, I've got it. I'll go and get it for you."

 

Tian Yuan sat on his knees on the playground, rubbing his son's hair.

 

"I want milk-flavored ice cream."

 

"You had diarrhea yesterday, so don't eat it today."

 

Tian Yuan glared at him. Why didn’t he explain why he had diarrhea! Didn’t he get diarrhea because this ba$tard didn’t wish to wear that thing[2]? Besides, he had taken medicine and was already feeling better.

 

"Okay, ancestor. I’ll buy the milk-flavored one. Neither of you listens to me. I'll throw you both out if you have diarrhea."

 

Pan Lei surrendered. He felt helpless against these little ancestors.

 

Tian Yuan kept petting Jindou’er. While these two lords rested on the playground, Pan Lei walked to the supermarket.

 

"Don't worry, your dad just talks. If either of us lords falls sick, he’ll be the most nervous."

 

Jindou'er leapt onto his legs and sat on Tian Yuan's lap, licking his face. The two lords played together happily.

 

Pan Lei only bought two ice cream cones. He ripped apart the wrapping paper on one of them and took a big mouthful, almost swallowing half of it, before passing it to Tian Yuan.

 

"Eat away. Now you won't get diarrhea."

 

Then he repeated the process with the other ice cream, biting off about half of it before giving it to his dog son. With this, he no longer had to worry about Jindou'er being too young and getting diarrhea if it ate too much ice cream.

 

He held the ice cream for Jindou'er, who licked it and wagged its tail. Pan Lei stole a bite from Tian Yuan's ice cream.

 

Two ice cream cones for a three-person family. They ate and shared it; how awful delightful! There were other folks out walking in the neighborhood. Some were repulsed, some were used to it, some went by completely unconcerned, and some girls on the side peered at them as the couple fought over an ice cream cone.

 

Their intimacy was a world that no one could enter. Whether others envied or despised them had nothing to do with the couple. It was enough to be immersed in their own world, to live only in the world that they had created.

 

That was the sum total of their mutual joy. Having one another was equivalent to having everything.

 

They will be unaffected by anyone's meaningful glances or opinions. Why should they care about people that are irrelevant to them?

 

They ate ice cream and got adequate rest. Jindou'er appeared to be happy, so Pan Lei decided to get some exercise.

 

"Run a few laps with your Dad, son, and show your Little Dad what a real man is. He’s a little man at best, not a manly man."

 

"Oh? Then, in ten minutes, run twenty circuits around the playground. You are not permitted to return home today if you do not complete the run."

 

Humph! You said I’m not man enough? Fine, then. You’re a manly man, aren’t you? Go on, run. If you can't finish running, don't even think about going back.

 

No big deal! Pan Lei shifted his weight and whistled.

 

"Son, son, keep up!"

 

Pan Lei took off ahead, while Jindou'er extended its short legs and pursued him. Tian Yuan squinted at them, a small smile on his face. How nice. This simple life can only be described in one word: beautiful.

 

So what if they didn't have any children? They didn't need that kind of person between them. They were together, and as long as they loved each other, as long as they continued to love each other without wavering, it was enough for a lifetime.

 

Some people come to this world to pass on their genes and finish their mission. Many people come to this world on a chance visit; they see the sights, savor life, and enjoy life. Some individuals just stand and look on indifferently. Yang Liping[3], the Peacock Princess, once stated that she came to this world to take in the landscape, to watch dew condense and clouds descend. Everyone has their own true meaning of life and way of life. "I came to this earth to wait for him and to be with him," was the true meaning of Tian Yuan and Pan Lei's lives. For them, being together was wonderful and this was a perfectly satisfying way of life.

 

Pan Lei would come over and kiss Tian Yuan on the cheek after each round. This was a behavior developed while watching Pan Lei jog. Pan Lei would use this kiss as motivation to sprint faster on the next lap.

 

Tian Yuan grinned.

 

"Hey, there are still three laps left! You have less than three minutes. You'll be sleeping on the streets tonight if you don't hurry."

 

Pan Lei ran over, pressed the back of his head, and stole a deep kiss.

 

He didn’t bother waiting for the tired Jindou’er. What a joke! What would he do if Tian’er insisted he sleep on the street? Pan Lei took off at full speed.

 

He went all out to be able to sleep with his arms around his husband tonight.

 

There's no need to emphasize a special forces soldier's incredible physical strength. There were still five seconds to go after these three laps. He ran the laps in one go, tugged Tian Yuan's wrist to check the time, and exhaled deeply. Whew! I don't have to sleep on the sidewalk tonight.

 

"I want to shower and change."

 

Tian Yuan gave a nod. Then let’s get home.

 

"You must help me bathe."

 

Rogue!

Footnotes:

[1] Guo Degang is a Chinese crosstalk comedian and actor.

[2] For my innocent munchkins (if any exist): PL didn't wear a condom. My sincere advice: A condom is your BFF. Use it. It bugs me when authors write about this as if it were a romantic thing. It isn't. Particularly for a gay couple.

[3] Yang Liping, dubbed the "Peacock Princess of China," is a Chinese dancer and choreographer who rose to prominence in 1986 after choreographing and performing "The Spirit of Peacock." Click here to see the video on YouTube.

Translator:

 

PL has been promoted! From now on, he'll be serving two ancestors~ har har

Jindou'er is a "he," but I'll refer to him as "it" in the translation. I don't want to add another "he/him" to the mix. Please let me know if you find it jarring to read. Mandarin is a contextual language, so I'm already typing TY and PL's names in a lot of sentences to make it obvious to the readers who is being referred to. (Heck, that's not even the worst of my troubles with this author. If you've MTLed the raws, you'll understand what I mean.) Just thinking about having to type Jindou'er more than necessary makes me wanna cry...

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