Chapter 11: Chapter 11: Vanity Mounts

I loved horses. I’d always loved horses. Back in the early years of high school, I’d made some friends with the horse girls in class. At first, I was only slightly made fun of, called a cowboy and so on, by the guys. As time progressed, the attention I got from girls our age, as platonic as it was, became a point of jealousy, and jokes became insults, and the dynamics of high school taught my contemporaries that being around me was social suicide. But for a few years, at least, I’d found a small group of people who I could gush about horses to and with. If they could only see me now. Though I think they’d probably have other questions, before they got around to the horses bit. 

 

I strode across the stable yard to see at least a dozen horses being groomed. They were beautiful. The stable master, someone I hadn’t gotten around to meeting yet, was frozen in fear at my approach. While I wanted to reassure him of my good intentions, it was entirely possible that there was an intimidation factor to consider when wearing a combination battle-armor-and-dress. I merely held up my hand in what I hoped he’d take as a calming gesture. 

 

The horses were big. They almost came halfway up to my chest at the withers, and their forehead could easily touch mine. I almost cried as I saw them. They looked royal. Majestic. Most importantly, they seemed in no way threatened by my presence, merely looking at me with interest. I looked at the stable master. He still seemed scared. 

 

“Can I?” I gestured at the horses. That shook him a bit, and he looked at me in confusion.

 

“They’re… your horses, yer majesty,” he mumbled. “Y’dont need my permission.” He held his head low.

 

I had an idea that might put him at ease some, and if I was going to be talking to an honest to god stable master I was going to do it as equals in the domain of horses, damn it. “I’m asking for it anyway.” I looked at the magnificent creatures. “They’re amazing. You should be proud of them. I’m not going to touch them without your permission.”

 

He was completely taken aback. If pressed I would’ve had to admit that I got some pleasure from how surprised he was at my over show of deference. He clearly hadn’t expected me to treat him like a master of his craft. I suddenly dreaded what previous interactions I might’ve had with the man. Or his predecessor, knowing Queen Eliza’s temperament. In surprise, he’d raised his head, and now looked at me curiously.

 

“‘F course, yer majesty. I am. Very proud, I mean. They’re probably the strongest horses this side of th’ Dergow.”

 

I had no idea what the Dergow was. Or were. But I wasn’t going to let him see that, obviously. I was too focused on the horses to put a lot of thought into it anyway. I reached over to gently touch the horse’s forehead and it pressed its muzzle against my arm. Its soft bristles were an interesting sensation. Despite having always loved them, this was the closest I’d ever gotten to one. Being in the presence of what must have been a metric ton of muscle was intimidating, even as big as I was. It nudged my arm and I could feel its strength in that movement. 

 

“Magnificent,” I mumbled, and the stable master beamed with pride. I couldn’t help but smile at him. He seemed a lot more comfortable now that he saw the reverence with which I would treat his wards, I thought. He put his hand on the horse’s crest and looked up at me.

 

“Yer majesty…” he started hesitantly. I looked at him and nodded, encouraging him to continue. “If I c’n ask… why come down ‘ere? This is yer first time you’ve shown interest in our business. ‘M just curious is all, I don’t mean any disrespect,” he added quickly, but he sounded worried. Maybe he was concerned I was going to change things for the worse? I wouldn’t have put it past the old queen to give people the impression that things could always get worse.

 

“Let’s just say I’ve had a change of heart,” I said as I gently pet the horse. “I’ve rediscovered my love of horses. Though I’m too tall to ride. Obviously.” Sadly. “But don’t worry, dude, I don’t intend to change things around here. Unless you need anything…” I paused. “What’s your name?”

 

“Samuel,” he said. That seemed to be the whole of it. 

 

“Do you need anything down here, Samuel?”

 

He shrugged. “We c’n always use better boxes for the horses, ‘f course. And a bigger pasture for the colts. Training in the yard ain’t always easy, y’ken.”

 

I nodded. “Alright! I’ll talk to Kazumi about it.” I looked the horse in the eyes again. “They deserve a good home.” 

 

Speaking of which.

 

“What about you, Samuel? Are you… happy, around here? Like, satisfied?”

 

He shrugged again, fidgeting with the front of his shirt. He clearly wasn’t sure if what I was saying wasn’t some sort of trap. 

 

“Happy as can be, yer majesty. Can’t complain, leastwise.”

 

I put a hand on my hip.

 

“Be honest with me, Samuel. You look like you’ve got something on your mind.”

 

“Well… the roads en’t been maintained ‘s well as they could be. You pay us good, yer majesty, but coin can’t buy food if there en’t enough to go around, y’ken.”

 

At least she’d paid the people working for her, I thought. Still, every day I found out just how incompetent of a ruler Eliza had been. She’d mostly led through brute strength. The lands under her rule had clearly not been doing well. But from what Kazumi had told me, the soil here was fertile. So what changed? Why were my subjects -- it was weird to realize I’d started thinking of them as my people -- if not starving, then at least going hungry? 

 

“I’ll have a look at it, Samuel. Thanks for being honest with me, alright?”

 

He looked relieved. For all he knew, I was still the same person who might have flogged him for speaking his mind to me. It made me feel gross, and my determination to make a positive change only grew stronger. I stuck out my hand. He looked at it like I’d offered him a live badger. I couldn’t help but laugh softly.

 

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“Just shake my hand, Samuel. I’m trying to say thanks.” 

 

He hesitantly shook my hand and I made a big effort not to crush his hand to paste. Just then, Sabine and Kazumi arrived and they both seemed curious and interested. 

 

“Just meeting Samuel here. Oh!” I perked up excitedly. “Did you see the horses?! They’re so. Pretty!”

Kazumi smiled at me and her shoulders seemed to drop a little as she sighed. Sabine did much the same, and they looked at each other and gave a soft laugh. I assumed they’d been talking about something related before. 

 

“I’ve seen the horses, yes, Queen Eliza,” Kazumi said brightly. I was worried for a second why she was treating me with this much formality, but I realized we weren’t in private. Keeping up appearances was important, after all.

 

“I’m wondering, though,” I thought out loud. “I obviously can’t ride these horses. They’re much too small to r--” My voice caught in my throat when Sabine pointed behind me and turned to look at what I’d first thought was another building separate to the stables.

 

The carriage was huge. Monstrous almost. It was easily twenty foot tall. Probably more. The hitch in front of it was so large it was hard to imagine how many horses were needed to pull it. It was also longer than images I’d seen of carriages. If a traditional horse-drawn cart was a car, this was a limousine.

 

“No…” I gasped in amazement. 

 

“Yes,” Kazumi said with a grin. I realized that she’d probably been waiting to show me the thing. It was humongous. And, I saw as I got closer, exactly proportional to my height. I just couldn’t get used to how big I was. 

 

The carriage, or rather, The Carriage, was very simple in design. It was black, with black curtains and black wheels. It had clearly been designed to be imposing. Because of course it had been, because Queen Eliza had been predictable in her tastes if nothing else. There were small dragon embellishments everywhere. I wondered briefly by what margin her desire to cover the whole thing in gold paint had lost to her incessant need to be feared. 

 

I opened the door. The inside wasn’t what I expected. Instead of a standard carriage interior -- which television and comic books had made me intimately familiar with -- the back end of the carriage was occupied by a throne to my, to Queen Eliza’s proportions, because of course it was. Beyond that, benches that seemed to be more accommodating to the smaller races lined the walls. A single bench could easily seat a dozen people. Or one really relaxed Lamia, I thought as I looked at Kazumi with a smile. Behind her, I saw Erza arrive in the courtyard as well. 

 

“You sent a message. We’re ready to head out?”

 

“I did,” Kazumi said with a small wave. “Almost. We just have to wait for the Queen’s escort. They should be arriving here any moment.”

 

My what? I didn’t think I needed an escort. I was probably stronger than anything I’d need on the road.

 

“Is that really necessary, Kazumi? I mean, I don’t need much protection, right?”

 

She smiled. “It’s not about protection, Queen Eliza.”

 

Sabine stared at something towards the gate of the castle. I followed her gaze. The procession that entered through the gate took my breath away. 

 

Leading the procession were several creatures, maybe half a dozen or so, that I recognized as Minotaur. I only ever saw them as spiritualistic, animalistic creatures in the fiction I’d consumed back home, but these were well armored, with heads held high and horns adorned with colourful ribbons and jewellery. While they were only about a third taller than a human and I easily towered over them, they made up for this in steel-plated bulk. They wouldn’t have fit through a human-sized door. The leader of them, recognized by a banner affixed to their shoulder plate, had their head up high and proud. 

 

Immediately behind them came the Centaur. I’d always imagined them as human torsos on a horse’s body, but never considered how small of a horse you’d have to find to affix a human to it without being disproportionate. Instead, these Centaur were as tall as I was. It was strange to see people I was at all times level with. Their armor, in stark contrast to that of the Minotaur, was light and organic, and covered their horse halves as much as it did their human parts. It made sense for them to want to maintain their speed, which was probably their greatest advantage. 

 

Immediately behind them slithered a dozen Lamia -- or were they Naga? -- clad in white gold that glittered in the sun. I looked at Kazumi. If she was proud of her fellow reptilians, she didn’t show it. I was thoroughly impressed regardless. 

 

More and more of what I’d been thinking of as the “monstrous races” came through the castle gates, each adorned in beautiful armor and proud. Not one race seemed intent on being anything less than the others, as if they all had something to prove. From Kobold, Gorgon and Satyr to species I barely recognized, though Sabine softly nudged me to point some of them out and give me quick histories of all of them. I barely paid attention, I was so overwhelmed by everything I was seeing. Though I did pick up that the large human-hyena creatures were called Gnoll and the large birds were known as Kenku, wrapped in black cloaks so as to protect their wings from the jostle that came with walking in formation.

 

The procession began to draw to a close, capped off by the last species to enter the courtyard. They were adorned in armor just like the others were, but they had a different air about them. They seemed more somber, determined. I understood quickly why. Their scaled faces and curved horns didn’t leave much to the imagination. Not a single one of the Dragonborn looked my way, and I could hardly blame them. Queen Eliza had probably not done much for their reputation. 

 

All the races assembled, there were easily a hundred armed warriors in the courtyard, of all shapes and sizes, and their armor shone in the sun in a thousand different colours. It was a most impressive display. 

 

“It’s not about protection,” Kazumi repeated.

 

The Queen’s escort had arrived.

 

“It’s about being seen.”

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