As I finished my compulsory education and upgraded to high school, I became more and more conscious of being a homecoming member.
The elementary and junior high schools are basically within walking distance from each other, so the difficulty level of the homecoming mission is low. There is absolutely no risk factor when leaving school. And I, who have lived my life as a professional, yawn.
As a professional in the field of school homecoming, I often watch programs that let young children do the shopping alone, just for reference. The show has them take money given to them by their immediate families and run all over Japan to a specific store. The show is supposed to be emotional with the story of a tearful reunion with the parents, but I am not convinced.
Why are they so amateurish about coming home?
Because they are small is not a good enough reason. Why is it that even a cat can come home without crying, but a young Homo sapiens is so lost?
Conclusion. Parents have no intention to raise their children as homecomers.
If they educate them from the time they are born to become professionals like us, they can come home in a day even if they are sent to a certain planet in the Andromeda Galaxy. What? You said you don't want me to be a homecoming member? Don't ever show your face in front of me again. And your child will grow up to be a good boy. I seriously recommend it.
So I was running down the hallway after school, drooling like a beautiful girl on the verge of tardiness.
When I crossed a classroom of another class, my well-trained sixth sense appealed to me.
A human being is coming out of the classroom!
I knew it and braked hard. You're too naive to think you can kill me...you're 46 billion years too young!
Gosh!
What was that sound? Can a human make that sound?
A sharp pain shot up my right toe and through my body. The moment I stopped, all five toes of my right foot went off. I thrashed around in pain. I wiped the dust off the hallway with my uniform like a rag.
It hurts, it hurts too much. I'll die of shock if I don't get some morphine in me soon. I rummaged through my pencil box, saying to myself, "Oh no, oh no, oh no, there is no morphine. It would be bad if there was.
The one who appeared at the door was, I think, Arina Hinoha. He left with one word: 'I feel sick'. Who do you think is responsible for this?
Me. He just blew himself up.
The pain didn't go away, so I had no choice but to go to the infirmary. It's a shame for a homecoming club member who is made of steel to use the infirmary, but this time I was reluctant to do so because I was in real pain.
Even a homecoming member can act like a human being once in a while, right?
So I went into the infirmary.
'Oh, what's the matter?
His voice and appearance reminded me of a day I had spent with him.
'I heard this place is no longer ...... good.
When I told her this, she looked a little sad.
Even though I didn't listen carefully, the sound of gunfire was steadily getting closer. I think she knows. But she won't say it. Because if she did, she would have to make a decision to abandon her friends who are suffering here. So she pretended not to know.
Someone has to stay behind. Until they are wounded and taken prisoner.
But there are no guarantees. On the spot is more likely. I wanted to get her out. I wanted to take her out. I wanted to take her out for the hell of it.
I wanted to protect her so much that I didn't care about the country or the people.
I reached out to her.
Give me your hand, give me your hand--
If you hold my hand, I can run. I can be braver than anyone.
But she smiled and said.
We'll meet again.
The door blew open. I ran and ran and ran and cried all over the mountain.
The next time I saw her again, she had turned to white sand.
I sobbed in front of the cross until the sun went down.
'--. I---bu. Are you okay?
Shocked by the beauty of the health teacher, I caught a glimpse of a memory of my previous life.
'Oh, I'm sorry. I, uh, twisted my toe. ......'
I'm back to being a pure bug-catching boy. This is impossible. Boys turn back into babies when they see a pretty girl or a beautiful woman. Bub.
Sit over there then?
I got a high from the ridiculously exciting aroma coming from the lab coat. What a wonderful scent. I want to sleep peacefully in it. I want to vacuum-pack it and store it in the freezer.
I was in a comatose state and stared at the doctor's back, forgetting about the pain in my legs. Can I stay here for a while without any treatment?
The doctor brought me compresses and ice and said to me, 'Well, take off your clothes,' which was not good for my education. I was about to get completely naked when I finally realized that he meant to ask me to take off my socks. Oh no, I almost had my name on the national news. I mustn't let my sister feel small.
'Yes, I'm done.
''Thank you very much.''
The teacher smiled and began to clean up.
That signaled the end. What a sad goodbye. I must have been like this in a previous life. It's too painful.
I left the infirmary as I was told, just like in my previous life.
Mizuki Akakusa.
An underworld informant has provided me with the teacher's real name.
What a ...... beautiful name ......!
Thin reddish hair like a tulip, red lips like a lulip, ...... teacher like a tulip, you are a tulip.
I had a slight dislike for the faculty members who disrespect the homecoming club, but I think I'm about to change my mind.
I started to gather information about the teacher.
I have been searching for the history of Mr. Akakusa, such as his tenure, status, relationships, favorite foods, hobbies, and so on. Why did I search? The information on the subjects we risk our lives to protect has to be exhaustive. When the members of the club are on guard duty, they are taught to 'protect them as if they were your wives'.
However, the age of the teacher could not be identified. The protection is so tight that the National Security Agency or the Cabinet Intelligence and Research Office is probably working behind the scenes. Therefore, his age and date of birth are unknown. From his appearance, we can guess that he is probably in his twenties. ...... Oops, someone has arrived.
We also got information that a male teacher is targeting Mr. Akakusa. He seems to be approached by a male teacher because he is single and has no boyfriend. Especially, the gym teacher is very interested in him. This is seriously unacceptable. Just put up with the illustrations in the health textbooks.
What? Are you running for the health committee?'
Makoto Takane replied disinterestedly.
''Yes.''
''That's surprising. Comets don't seem to be interested in committees. He doesn't join club activities, but he does join committees.
'I feel like I've heard the word "homecoming club" my whole life.
Don't look so bad. I'm going to run for office, so give it to me.
'I have no intention of joining the committee in the first place. ......'
Then fine. High school students these days have no knowledge of special weapons. I'll join the health committee and teach them from scratch. I'll start with a basic knowledge of NBC weapons.
'Shirana, how can you talk to such a freak? ......'
With a distant look in his eyes, he covered his ears and rejected my voice. Oh dear. Makoto, you don't have to cover your ears. I've already torn your eardrums.
Well, it was all a joke. I'm really just trying to get close to the archangel Mizuki Akakusa. If you break a bone or vomit blood yourself, you can get in touch with her legally, but what hurts hurts and takes time to regenerate, even if you're a homecoming boy. The best thing to do is to join the health committee. The president of this organization is Mizuki Akakusa, the hope of all mankind.
As I had planned, I was successfully elected as a member of the health committee.
What? Are you crazy?
At the first health committee meeting of the school year, a second-year girl who happened to be sitting next to me accused me of having a strange brain structure. Can you say that in front of my mom and dad?
You're the one who's crazy. I've never spoken a word to her. I mean, I'd never even spoken to her before, and suddenly she's all, 'Are you nuts?
I froze, and then replied in a slurred voice.
I froze, and then replied in a terse manner: 'I don't know what you mean by ......'.
Hm? I thought I smelled something crazy.
'No, no, no, what does it smell like?
'Hmm, I wonder what it's like. I can't explain. So why did you join the health committee?
'You're incoherent. You should reboot your brain.
'It's for the teacher, isn't it?'
Did he-- did he read your mind?
A senior happily stares at me when I'm upset. He's smiling and testing me to see how I'll react.
But this situation is nothing but a crisis. I'll tell you a secret. When you're in trouble, acting like a freak usually solves it. I've been saved from many a crisis that way.
No, sir. I joined the health committee to tell high school students about the dangers of constipation.
'Heh~'
You said you didn't get a reaction. A normal high school girl would have said, "Oh my God, Sakakiki-kun, you're so hot! And you're angry. So why is this senior boringly drawing a picture of poo on my right hand with a permanent marker? Why--why--why? Certainly poop is an important word in communicating with elementary school students. If you call it repeatedly for a while, they will start imitating you like a nine-headed bird and you will become friends with them. I was once revered as the "king of poop" by elementary school students for this method.
I was once adored as the 'king of poo' by an elementary school student. I just thought maybe you're on the same wavelength as me.
'...... How do you know my name?'
'It was on the wanted list at the police station.
'Wow, I'm surprised.
"Charged with theft of ten-yen gum.
'You are a small person, aren't you?
I see, similar wavelengths indeed. This guy gets the joke.
The atmosphere was still joking and battling, but it was interrupted by the arrival of the goddess, Mizuki Akakusa. I was liquefied and my memory was lost in the face of such godliness.
When I regained consciousness, I checked the situation. It seems that I was being spanked by my senpai. It seems that he is beating my liquefied state and hardening me.
The committee meeting is over.
'Are you serious? I knew you were an angel, Mr. Akakusa.
I knew you were after the teacher.
And so I began my work as a health committee member.
My senior was named Aki Mine, and to put it simply, she was a person who was moderately screwed up and crazy like me.
Let's call him a weirdo, since the word "crazy" might be misinterpreted. A weirdo is a name given to a person who has the ability to change the world. It is always the weirdos who change the world. Ordinary people blend in with the masses and remain silent. But the weirdo does not like to blend in and remains independent. That is why change is only possible for the weirdo. They always give us new values.
I enthusiastically supported Dr. Akakusa.
I assisted him with health checkups, conducted health-related educational activities, replenished toilet paper, maintained the sanitation of the environment, and performed other duties even when he was not looking. It worked, and the teacher actively chose me and offered to help me.
I understand. I'm just a useful student. I can't shake that fact.
Comet, thank you for that time.
What are you talking about?
'You know, when Suzudo, the chemistry teacher, collapsed.
He told me this story when I was helping him prepare for a physical examination as an assistant. I remember it as I was moving the measuring instruments around.
'Oh. You mean that time?
Yes, yes, yes. Mr. Suzudo, he was very grateful to you.
During chemistry class, Mr. Suzudo suddenly collapsed. The class was in turmoil, wondering what was going on, and I rushed to the staff room to ask for help. None of the students, including myself, knew that Ms. Suzudo was pregnant, so it was no wonder that we panicked.
The combination of the fact that she was a member of the health committee and a professional homecoming club member made it possible for me to do what I did.
But I was surprised, wasn't I? When he suddenly came into the staff room, he said, 'Sir! Come here!" Loudly. I thought I was going to be kidnapped.
'I'm sorry. I was upset.
'No, no. I'm proud of you. The teacher still thinks it was a good thing that comet-kun had a strong sense of responsibility.
'Well, call me if you need anything. We'll get most things sorted out. I'm the best homecoming club member.
'Oh, you can count on me. Well then...''
The teacher was about to say something.
'What is it? Are you in trouble?''
'--No. But I may eventually ...... ask a favor of Comet eventually.'
'Feel free to do so. I'll take care of it. I'm a professional.