Chapter 108: Then I'll help you

Shishio then stood up, taking off his track pants, showing his boxer to Shiina, but unlike the normal harem protagonist or Sorata on the story, where they were quite flat on their nether region, when he showed his boxer to Shiina, there was a huge bulge that couldn't be hidden there, and let him remind everyone who read the chapter that he wasn't hard and his dick was at a soft state at this moment.

Even though Shishio was an adolescent boy and he was at puberty, which caused his hormones to be very hard to control, it was hard to treat Shiina as a girl, especially when her expression was so pure, staring at him like a pure angel. He felt that if he showed a reaction then he would be a sinner, which was why he tried very hard to control himself.

After he took off his pants, Shishio looked at Shiina's reaction and felt a bit surprised when he saw her in a daze, staring at his lower body. "Have you seen enough?" He was full of a tease when he asked this question.

Shiina wasn't sure, but she felt that her face was very hot and she somehow understood the difference between a male and a female, and at the same time, she also understood that Shishio's body was exceptionally good. She didn't ask about the big bulge on his boxer, after all, even though she didn't have common sense, it didn't mean she was stupid and she also understood some difference between a male and a female, but...

"Shishio, did you get hard?" Shiina asked since she felt that the bulge was quite big.

"...." Shishio was speechless and somehow understood her question. He shook his head and said, "No, I don't get hard."

"But I have heard that boys will get big when they're excited," Shiina asked.

"Well, mine is big, even though it isn't hard," Shishio said simply, and at the same time, he wanted to know where this girl learned that kind of knowledge before.

"....." Shiina blinked her eyes and somehow felt quite confused.

Shishio sighed and said, "You should know that among girls there are some who have a big and a small chest, boys are also like that, some of them have a small dick and some of them have a big dick." He felt that he needed to be straightforward when he talked with Shiina, after all, this girl still lacked some knowledge so he couldn't explain in a more polite way since she might not understand him, but somehow he really wanted to beat himself up when he explained all of that to her.

Shiina nodded and understood, after all, she also understood that some girls had a big chest, and some girls had a small chest, but she didn't expect for a guy to be the same, but no one could blame her, after all, unlike girl's chest that could be easily seen through clothes, a guy's dick was hidden on their pants.

"So is this enough?" Shishio asked again since he wanted to wear his clothes again, after all, even though it was spring, it was still very cold for him.

"Can you lay on your bed?" Shiina asked.

"????" Shishio raised a question mark on the top of his head, but he nodded and laid on his bed.

Shiina then, without hesitation, followed Shishio and was about to straddle his waist, but his reaction was very fast, and he quickly stopped her by holding her waist before her butts touched his nether region. Even though he had said that he couldn't treat this girl like a girl, she was still a beautiful girl, and if she really sat in his nether region...

"What are you doing?" Shishio quickly asked and there was sweat on his forehead since he was a bit overwhelmed at that moment.

Shiina didn't answer Shishio's question immediately, after all, when he held her waist, she felt that there was a jolt of electricity that ran through her entire body. She looked at his hands that were on her waist, holding her, trying to stop her, which caused her to ask, "Your hands."

"You can't sit on my waist," Shishio said and put this girl on his bed. With his strength, it was very for him to carry this girl, after all, Shiina was quite thin.

"Why?" Shiina asked with a confused expression.

"My dick might get hard," Shishio said with a blush. He knew that he couldn't lie and needed to be straightforward, but still, he felt embarrassed. He also let out a long sigh, wondering why he needed to say something like this.

"I don't mind," Shiina said and thought that Shishio was quite cute when he blushed.

"....."

Shishio wanted to say something but closed his mouth again. In truth, he wanted to say that there was a monster that was sleeping inside his boxer at that moment and if Shiina wasn't careful, then she might be eaten, but he knew that he couldn't say that. He took a deep breath, trying to calm himself, then stared at Shiina. "Mashiro, you should remember that you shouldn't say that. I know that you might have a good opinion of me and I also care about you, but you also need to know that we have only met each other for the past few days, our meeting is too short so you shouldn't believe in me so easily. I'm also a man and you're a charming girl, if you keep tempting me, then we might do something that we might regret in the future."

"Will Shishio attack me?" Shiina asked while looking at Shishio's face.

"...." Shishio was lost for words and shook his head. "No, I'm just telling the fact that you're a charming girl, and you should be careful around boys."

Shiina nodded and said, "I'll only do this with Shishio."

"......." Shishio simply gave up. "Just be quick, alright?" He might not be able to control himself if Shiina sat on his nether region so he moved her to his stomach. He could feel her soft butts which made him raise his eyebrow and knew that his will was being tested at this moment.

"Um." Shiina nodded and sat on his stomach while watching from above. She touched Shishio's body again and said, "Your body is very good, Shishio."

"Hmm..." Shishio twitched in the corner of his mouth and stopped Shiina's hand that was about to touch his nipple again. She tried to touch his nipple again, but he stopped her again, so she simply gave up.

"Did you do any sport?" Shiina asked.

"I do Bajiquan," Shishio said simply.

"Bajiquan?" Shiina titled her head.

"It's a martial art from China." Shishio didn't seem surprised by Shiina's reaction, after all, this martial art was quite uncommon.

Shiina nodded and asked, "Why did you learn it?"

"So I can become strong," Shishio said.

"Why do you want to become strong?" Shiina asked.

"So I can protect my loved one better," Shishio said with a light smile.

"..." Shiina stared at Shishio for a while then asked, "Then are you still learning?"

"No, I have stopped," Shishio said while shaking his head.

"Why?" Shiina was confused at why Shishio stopped.

"It's like you, who have decided to become better at your painting by drawing a manga." Shishio gave a light smile and said, "I'm also the same. I feel that I can't get strong enough just by practicing bajiquan."

Shiina was surprised but nodded in understanding. "Are you going to learn another martial art?"

"Yes, after all, Bajiquan isn't a perfect martial art and it has a weakness too, so I'm going to learn a martial art that can complement this martial art," Shishio said. Even though he said that he didn't intend to learn another martial art, rather he wanted to fight someone strong, so he could become stronger, but there was no way he could say that to Shiina, right?

Shiina nodded, then after she touched his body, she looked at him and called out his name. "Shishio."

"Hmm?"

"Can you hold me?" Shiina asked.

"...." Shishio stared at Shiina for a while, opened his arms, and said, "Move closer."

"Um." Shiina nodded and felt his strong arms gently wrapped around her body. She felt that her heart was beating very fast and her body was very hot, but she might feel addicted to it. "Tighter." She could feel that the force around his arms became tighter, that it might be hard for her to breathe, but even so, she didn't want him to stop and wanted this to continue. She looked up at him and saw that Shishio just happened to look at her eyes. "Shishio..." She called his name softly and looked at him with blurred eyes as if she was drunk at this moment.

Shishio quickly woke up when he heard his name being called. He quickly let go of his arms and said, "Let's stop here." He then quickly separated from her, turned around, and tried to calm his state since he knew that he might do something that couldn't be undone if he didn't stop.

Shiina felt a slight loss when Shishio let her go, but at the same time, she understood why he said that his thing was big since she caught a glimpse of his hard thing which somehow made her feel her body was burning. She looked at his back and called out his name again. "Shishio."

"Hmm?" Shishio was quite wary since he was afraid this girl might ask him some strange request again.

"Have you ever had sex?" Shiina asked.

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"......"

Shiina didn't receive an answer from Shishio, but she wasn't sure why it made her heart feel tight. "Have you?"

Shishio turned around and nodded. "I have." He felt that he couldn't lie to this girl.

Shiina lowered her head and asked, "...With your girlfriend?"

"No, I don't have a girlfriend," Shishio said while shaking his head.

Shiina looked up and asked, "With who?"

"A girl." Shishio looked out the window and somehow his chest tightened when he remembered that day. "Anyway, you should go back now. It's very troublesome to explain to someone why you're in my room tonight." He then wore his clothes again, with his back facing Shiina, but then he heard her voice again.

"Shishio."

"Hmm?"

"Let's have sex."

"...." Shishio frowned then turned his head, looking at Shiina who was staring at him. He then walked toward her, then flicked her forehead without hesitation.

"Ouch!" Shiina held her forehead and cried a bit, staring at Shishio in grief. "It hurts."

"Just bear with it, it's still better than the regret that you feel if you really have sex with me." Shishio then squatted down, then raised his head slightly, looking at Shiina's eyes while holding both of her hands tenderly. "Mashiro, please promise me that you shouldn't say something like that so lightly."

"Why? You have done it with a girl, but why don't you do it with me?" Shiina asked like a child that wasn't allowed to play a game by their parents.

Shishio let out a sigh then asked, "Mashiro, do you understand what love is?"

"Love?" Shiina wanted to nod, but she shook her head, but then she frowned. She might understand, but she didn't fully understand what love was.

"What you're doing right now is just an impulse." Shishio felt that regret so he didn't want Shiina to feel the same feeling that he felt. "When someone has sex with each other, they need to feel in love with each other first. As for now, I'm not sure whether what you feel toward me is love, impulse, lust, or another feeling, after all, we have only met each other for few days, but one thing for sure, we can't have sex now."

"When can we have sex?" Shiina asked.

"....." Shishio was dumbfounded and asked, "Do you love me?"

Shiina thought for a while and nodded. "I might be."

"Might?" Shishio raised his eyebrow.

"I don't understand my feelings very well, but I know that I want to be with you," Shiina said softly.

"...." Shishio wasn't sure what to say since he didn't feel the same feeling toward Shiina.

"Shishio, what about you? Do you love me?" Shiina asked softly, but her tone was slightly tense.

"....." Shishio knew that it might sound cruel, but he couldn't be indecisive and said, "I don't love you, but I care about you." If he didn't care about Shiina, then he wouldn't stop her from contacting Sorata, after all, he didn't want to be dragged down by that scumbag, but for love? He felt that it was too early and he couldn't say something like that to a girl that he had only met for a while.

"....." Shiina didn't understand, but she felt her heart was hurt that it made her want to run, but when she looked at him, she felt quite unwilling and decided to ask him again, "Then... do you love someone else?" She wanted to know who was the person that had made him fall in love.

Shishio hesitated, but when he saw Shiina's pure eyes that were mixed with some sadness, he then said, "I might not be able to fall in love with someone now."

"Why?" Shiina asked again softly, wanting to understand him better.

"I have to say goodbye to someone properly and before that, I don't have any intention to fall for someone right now," Shishio said, after all, even though he had said that he wanted to have a girlfriend or he didn't want to let go both Nana and Miu, he didn't have an intention to do both of them right away. He still couldn't let go of his past, clinging, remembering his days with his girlfriend, family, and friends in his previous life. It might sound pathetic, but he couldn't throw away and forget his memories from his previous life so he could live happily in his new life, right?

"Then I'll help you. I'll help you to say goodbye properly," Shiina said while looking at Shishio, then patted his head, feeling that it might make him better, after all, she felt better when he patted her head so he would feel the same, right?

Patting his head, Shiina could see some sadness in his eyes and she didn't want to see him sad. She also didn't know why, but when she heard his reason, there was some relief and light appeared once again in her eyes.

"..." Shishio was in silence, staring at Shiina's eyes who also stared at him without, looking away, and all he could see that she really wanted to help him. He then smiled gently and said, "You should go back now. I want to sleep." He felt that he might not be able to control his emotion if she stayed here any longer.

Shiina nodded and took her drawing book and pencil, then walked out from his room, but before she went out, she stood in front of the entrance of his room.

"What's wrong? Did you forget something?" Shishio asked.

"Kiss," Shiina said.

"...Kiss?" Shishio was lost for words.

"Rita has always kissed me on the forehead before I go to sleep," Shiina said.

"...You want me to do that?" Shishio asked inexplicably.

"Um." Shiina nodded and asked, "Can you?"

"....." Shishio raised his eyebrow, twitched his lips, and let out a sigh. "Rita that you mentioned before is a girl, right?"

"Um, she's a girl." Shiina nodded.

"I'm a boy." Shishio was lost for words.

"I don't mind," Shiina said.

"......"

"Can you?" Shiina asked.

"Come closer." Shishio gave up, feeling that he was facing a little girl, rather than a normal girl.

Shiina nodded with a slight smile in her eyes as if she had won something then without hesitation she moved closer.

Shishio was just right at the entrance of his door, his hand lifted Shiina's bangs gently, lowered his head, then kissed her forehead. He then patted her head for the last time, then said, "Good night."

Shiina touched her forehead that was kissed by Shishio. She wasn't sure why, but she felt very warm, shy, and various mixed emotions, but one thing for sure, she didn't hate this feeling. She gave him a smile and said, "Good night."

Shishio looked at Shiina's smile and couldn't look away, then he watched her slowly disappear from his sight then touched his face, wondering why he had done all of that before, after all, even though she was like a little girl, they were the same age. He let out a long sigh and felt quite complex. He shook his head and decided to sleep since somehow, he wanted to calm himself now since he knew that he had become a full-fledge scumbag.

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