Chapter 7: 7

The level of awkwardness has increased as much as the prolonged silence. I chose to answer for now.

 

“Oh… Yes, thank you for the meal.”

 

“That’s a relief. I especially invited the Imperial Patissier.”

 

“Is that so?”

 

I responded to him in moderation, but I was confused because I couldn’t get used to it at all.

 

Our mealtime in the past usually ended in a few words. ‘Delicious’, ‘Thank you for the meal’.

 

Other words never came up to the table unless I mentioned them first. Even so, as the number of meals decreased, even listening to greetings became an annual event.

 

Is this person right in front of me a completely different person from the old Leopold? Then maybe it’s easier to let go of everything. Sadly, the person I loved doesn’t exist here.

 

“I skipped lunch because my meeting got longer. Thanks to you, this meal is quite satisfying, how about you?”

 

“……it’s delicious.”

 

However, contrary to my answer, I felt like I couldn’t taste the food.

 

I don’t want to talk and share my daily life to him as if we were an ordinary couple. This is a shortcut to hell.

 

I loosened my lower lip, which I had bit slightly, and asked him with difficulty.

 

“By the way, Leopold. Can I eat quietly now?”

 

“Oh, did I say too much nonsense? I’m sorry.”

 

“You don’t have to be sorry.”

 

In the dining room, only the sound of the bowl and glass bumping into each other was left. Fortunately, I was able to finish my meal calmly in the familiar silence.

 

Now it was time to tell the story I had prepared.

 

“Leopold, I have something to say–“

 

“Let’s start with dessert.”

 

He cut off my words in a soft tone. After nodding my head, I once again organized what I had to say as I saw the dishes being removed.

 

Anyway, it’s nothing urgent because I only have to inform him before I leave the dining hall.

 

However, something unexpected came up on the clean table.

 

“What… what is this?”

 

The wedding vows were placed on the table with the dessert. That horrible piece of paper that I wasn’t able to sign until half a year later in my previous life.

 

He answered sincerely even though he knew it wasn’t a question I made because I didn’t know.

 

“Since we have become a married couple, we should put our signatures on the pledge and get approval from His Majesty on paper.”

 

I glanced down at the marriage vows. The name Hazel Lawrence, written side by side next to my husband’s name, was surprising.

 

‘Leopold, Mother asked why you haven’t signed our marriage vows yet. I didn’t even know there was such a thing……. To put me on the family tree, I need a pledge with His Majesty to seal the deed.’

 

‘Oh, I forgot because it wasn’t important. I’ll tell Peter to get it ready sooner or later.’

 

However, after some time, the butler never asked me to sign it. Eventually, I visited him again and repeated the same words, and only then did my husband give out the marriage vows with a reluctant face.

 

I didn’t ask him to marry me, but I was hurt for no reason. What a bitter smile he had when he said it wasn’t important.

 

“I won’t sign it.”

 

Leopold frowned slightly at my calm but firm answer. I quickly added a backstory as if I hadn’t noticed.

 

“And this marriage, let’s pretend it never happened.”

 

His beautiful green eyes shook endlessly like a typhoon in the forest. Why do people who have never been shaken by anything in their lives look like they don’t deserve it? A strong wind seemed to be blowing in my heart.

 

“……I don’t want to.”

 

“I’m not asking for your consent. If I don’t sign the pledge, I won’t be officially recognized anyway, so if I leave, time will naturally solve the rest. It won’t be a problem to marry someone else. But I’m sorry to tarnish the Lawrence family’s name in this way.”

 

I quickly poured out what I had to say and lowered my eyes. I wanted to make eye contact, but as always, I felt like his cold eyes were going to freeze everything.

 

“Why…… tell me.”

 

Leopold asked with difficulty. He must be holding back his anger because I’m talking like this when we just had a big wedding.

 

I wanted to tell him the truth that it’s all because of him, that I’m leaving because I’m afraid of hurting him again, but that relationship has already ended in the past.

 

“I want to live freely. The status of a duchess is too restrictive. And….”

 

I looked up again and looked at him. Leopold, as I thought, seemed angry. His piercing gaze felt aggressive. I went on without paying attention.

 

“We don’t love each other. I’m not going to play with emotions like love in the future.”

 

“……play with emotions?”

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“Yes, at least to me. And I know it sounds funny to you, but I think I should marry someone I really love. It should not be politically arranged by others. It’s hard for me to change that old-fashioned way of thinking, perhaps because I was born lowly.”

 

“You, what are you saying?”

 

“It’s true.”

 

I stood up from my seat after pouring out what I wanted to say.

 

“I don’t think I can eat dessert.”

 

“No.”

 

“Haven’t you finished eating?”

 

When I asked back in wonder, Leopold swallowed his breath once and said as if throwing up.

 

“If you want to live freely, do so. I’ll build you mansions all over the empire. You can go abroad if you want. Take Jayden with you. You don’t have to stay in the duke’s mansion. But… you can’t get married.”

 

“Why?”

 

“That’s…”

 

He gulped down the wine without further ado.

 

He just came up with the conclusion that I can’t get married without bringing up any particular reason. He’s an aristocrat, too. What others see is the most important category.

 

“Is reputation so… so important?””

 

But like a fool, I asked to be sure.

 

He’s been friendly for a day, so I hope he had a little heart for me in that friendly act.

 

No, it’s okay if he doesn’t have a heart for me. I might change my mind at once because I am weak to him just by him playing the beat with his empty words.

 

“……Yes.”

 

But my husband couldn’t come up with the answer I wanted. Such a dreamy answer that he can’t let go of me because he loves me is impossible even in my imagination.

 

Oh, really stupid Hazel. What the hell do you expect after all that?

 

My lower lip, which was unknowingly tightly bitten, tasted like blood. A familiar taste of despair

 

“Okay, I’ll sign it eventually. It’s not that urgent.”

 

It doesn’t matter if Leopold doesn’t agree with me. He’s a busy man, so I’ll have plenty of time to sneak away. Besides, once he’s gone, my husband won’t bother looking for me. Such a ‘trouble’ doesn’t fit Leopold’s character.

 

Anyway, I thought I would consider it a strange stubbornness to just move my hand a few times, but this method was the best right now.

 

And… he did it to me, too. This pledge doesn’t matter.

 

Leopold waited for an answer with mixed feelings, enduring what he might not know and wanted to add.

 

“If that’s the case, I’ll give in now. But it shouldn’t be for too long.”

 

He seemed to be thinking for a moment, but he said softly. A beautiful low voice has stuck deep in my heart. Emotions that have been hidden are slowly dug up.

 

I thought all my lingering feelings had disappeared, but I didn’t know I would be so disappointed because he didn’t rush me to sign. I felt bitter like a dandelion seed floating without taking root anywhere.

 

Trying not to be dominated by emotions, I changed the subject.

 

“Oh, there’s something I want to check. I mean, your physical condition. Can I take a look?”

 

“Are you afraid that I will get sick anywhere? Thank you, but I’m okay.”

 

He chuckled a little. That’s understandable, Leopold was born strong and told his mother that he had never had even a minor illness since he was young.

 

But I didn’t mean to let it slide. If I leave something to worry about, I will think of him again and again even after I leave.

 

“It will only take a little time.”

 

Leopold, who had been hesitating with a slight roll of his eyes, nodded in agreement. Then he got up straight and came up to me and asked.

 

“Like this?”

 

“Yes, I’m just checking. Please excuse me.”

 

I tried to get up from my seat to match his height, but Leopold’s movement was faster. He bent his upper body forward towards me. His face was really close to my nose. As if nothing had happened, I put my hand still on his wide chest. Perhaps because I had rarely touched my husband like this, my arm became stiff with tension.

 

“Don’t move because it doesn’t hurt.”

 

I even seemed to be trembling, so I hid my feelings by taking out words that I didn’t have to say on purpose. I was wondering if I hid it properly.

 

A bluish light flowed from my fingertips and began to be absorbed into Leopold’s body. I closed my eyes and carefully examined his body around the heart along the flow of light.

 

Contrary to my concern, there was nothing wrong. No memory of the problem area has been read. Rather, I was surprised to see how healthy a person could be.

 

“You’re in good health, I’m glad to see that.”

 

The burst of relief made me laugh quietly.

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