I Tried Becoming a Cupid, But Why do the Girls I Find Always End Up As Yanderes?!

Chapter 1: Obligatory Prologue where someone gets killed


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"Amano-kun!"

"Y-Yes!!"

Under the orange glow of sunset, behind the gym. One could say that it was the perfect place for a confession.

A boy and a girl stood face to face, looking into each other's eyes. 

The atmosphere was great, and the two were flushing red, impassioned gazing back into each other's eyes. Truly a testament to the existence of true love, a showing of youth.

Unbearable. Exhilarating, heart-pounding! What fervent passion! What intensity! I writhed happily in wait for the confession scene.

I'm so proud of you guyssss!!

Crying out internally, I grinned excitedly as I lay hidden behind a wall, watching and praying for their success.

Yes, the pair would become another couple amongst the many that I've brought together in this school.

Fufufu...

As expected of me, I expect nothing less from a genius (not self-proclaimed) like me!

Rigging their meal times, their bus seats, and even the time they spent during the holidays... it was all for today!

I spied at the awaited moment of truth in anticipation—

Ahhh, I can't take it anymore. Hurry please, the two of you. Just kiss already~

The girl looked away with hints of red on her face, her lips just opening and closing hesitantly.

It was the look of a maiden in love.

Finally, it seemed like she had decided to pull up her courage. 

The girl clenched her hands together at the front, and repeated: "Amano-kun!"

"Y-Yes, Sayuri!"

"The truth is... I..."

The boy gulped. 

I knew what he was thinking. Going out with the most beautiful girl in school, that was a dream come true. But don't be dismayed. You're definitely not dreaming. I've made it a reality for you, so grab that sweet future with your own two hands!

It's a done deal, I thought. Another couple formed under the guidance of this matchmaker.

I was already preparing a guts pose when it happened at that moment...

"—Um, I hope you'll stop touching me with those disgusting hands. And also, please die for me, will you?"

"E-Eh?"

The boy widened his eyes in horror, and looked down to his lower half.

A knife was plunged right into his stomach.

The white summer uniform was slowly stained in dark red. 

I...

"W...W-W-W-W-W-W-WHAT?!"

I stepped out of my hiding spot, a head full of retorts.

The boy glanced at me for a moment, before he collapsed to the ground, motionless. His eyes were wide open, shocked with disbelief.

The murderer herself yet seemed to be extremely calm on the contrary.

"Sayuri-san! Y-You..." I looked at the girl who was holding a bloodied knife in her hand.

Why did it all go so wrong? The confession scene wasn't supposed to end like thissss!!!

Sayuri's shoulder twitched as I called her name, and she slowly turned around, an expression of rapture...?

"A~h~ Senpai, so you were there!"

Somehow... I had a bad feeling from this girl...

"Kyaa, I'm so embarrassed, you had to see all of that!"

Her dead eyes had returned to a spark of vibrancy, and she walked over to me with light steps. I could've sworn she had stepped on the corpse with a little bit more pressure when she passed it.

 Even then, her sweet, effeminate voice was poorly contrasted with the splatter of blood that had dirtied the side of her face. Hugging me from the front, Sayuri rubbed her nose left and right, inhaling deeply to my scent with an euphoric expression. My clothes were inevitably tainted by the blood on her hands, and the smell of iron drifted into my nose. I staggered back unsteadily from feeling nauseous, but the girl stuck closely to me not wanting to let go.

"You came, as expected! Sen~pai!" Sayuri smiles sweetly at me, and the back of my spine shivers.

"W-What... Sayuri... what did you do?!"

I pulled her away from me roughly, and the girl steadied herself after staggering back a few steps, as if she didn't understand why I had pushed her away.

Sayuri tilts her head, and places a finger on her pursed lips.

"Ahahaha... what? You mean, killing Amano-kun?" 

"...Eh...?"

Her eyes laid on the knife, and her smile grew even wider.

"Amano-kun is just a hindrance... the truth is... I LOVE YOU, SENPAI!"

"W-What...?! I don't... understand..."

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I collapsed onto the ground weakly.

"It's okay senpai... you don't have to understand me. As long as you're with me, that's all that matters."

What...? She had... feelings for... me? A huge miscalculation... what a huge miscalculation...!

"But what abou—"

"—Ah, that water flea huh." 

W-Water flea...

"Amano-kun just doesn't get it... really, things wouldn't have to come to this... it's Amano-kun's fault you know? That disgusting person keeps following me around always... always, always, always...!!! I can never catch a fucking break! I hate him because he keeps trying to take the time we have together away, Amano-kun is a fly... a shitty fly clinging on to me. Ahhh, my head... it's so noisy... I can never relax when Amano-kun keeps coming to see me. Even during Golden Week, Amano-kun didn't let me go."

... That's not it... I told Amano...

"I wanted to see Senpai, I wanted to be lovey-dovey with Senpai, but shitty fly keeps buzzing around. Looking at me with lecherous eyes, but it's okay if Senpai sees me in a lewd way! But Amano-kun is an insect, I feel uncomfortable when he looks at me. 

Isn't that disgusting? Even though the one I love is Senpai? He should've known his place, but it's no use..."

The girl stared down at me with ecstasy-filled eyes as she keeps talking continuously. Her words were unhinged and bloodshot.

"I don't know why he brought me to this place, but I finally had an opportunity to get rid of him! Ahahahaha, now... we're free to love each other, Senpai, isn't that great?!"

She bent down and straddled my body. 

Coming closer to my face, the girl blew into my ear and looked at me longingly. 

"S-Stop...Sayuri-san!"

"Aaah aahh~ I'm not going to stopp!!! You have no idea how long I've waited for this! From now on... we'll be together... forever, okay~?"

"No..."

This is a nightmare.

"Nooo.... NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

 

 

...THUMP. 

My eyes opened to a familiar ceiling.

A painful sensation was felt on the back of my head.

I realized groggily somehow, that it really was a nightmare.

I put a hand over my face, and sighed heavily.

"Shit... what the hell was that."

 

I could hear running footsteps coming up the second floor.

A few moments later, the door to my bedroom slammed open. 

A girl wearing a pastel yellow apron looked around worriedly, before settling down on  me who had fallen right beside the bed. 

"Kyou! W-What's wrong?!"

"...Ahahaha... I fell down. Don't worry about it, Mari-chan." I laughed wryly while scratching my cheeks awkwardly.

"...That so. Please, even if you're doing that, please do it in moderation. To even fall off your own bed while taking your morning load out on tissue paper... that's a new low, Kyou."

"..." My dear sister, can you please not look at your brother with that kind of face? It sort of hurts my soul.

The twin-tailed girl, Tachibana Mari left after confirming that I was alright.

"Anyway. You're up just in time. I made breakfast, so hurry up and come down before it gets cold."

"A-Ah, right! I'll be right there." I responded to the voice in the hallway outside.

I scratched my hair and yawned. Looking out of the window, I realized that the sun was already starting to rise.

It was a little early, but I figured that I might as well get up now.

"After all... today is my first day in a new school!" I muttered.

And a new school term also means the start of new romance. It's the free season of love, with me of course, as its most loyal advocate!

I opened the door with a refreshing smile, and came down the stairs while brushing my bed hair with a comb.

Never too late to prepare myself mentally, and physically, because first impressions are always the most important!

"Kyou, why are you talking to yourself again... gross."

"..."

 

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