Chapter 17: 17

Volume 1, Chapter 17: Why?

 

House, school, part-time job. It didn't matter where I was. Wherever it may be, I wasn’t going to receive any kind of love. I knew that. That's why I had given up on everything. I should have given up, but...I hadn't been myself lately.

 

Why was that? Why was I losing my cool? It should just be the same as usual. Wake up in the morning, go to my part-time job, return to my house and go to bed. That was all there was in my life. Just chugging along mechanically day by day.

 

With this kind of life, I should have given up on everything. I had wanted to be loved by my mother, Nana, and Sayaka. But that wish didn't come true. That's why I gave up. Right, I had given up on everything. I didn't want to be loved anymore. That should be the case.

 

That's why I just repeated my usual routine.

 

"...Good morning, Manato."

 

As I was heading to school, Ayano was waiting for me.

 

"Ayano? Is there something wrong?"

 

Why was she waiting? Now that I had broken our bond as childhood friends, she shouldn't have to deal with me anymore.

 

"...Like I thought, you wouldn't call me by my name."

"Did you say something?"

 

Her voice was too quiet. I couldn't hear well.

 

"...No, it's nothing."

"I see. So, why were you waiting?"

 

I asked her about what I wanted to hear the most.

 

"...I just thought I'd go to school with Manato."

 

Just why. Didn't she like that senpai of hers?

 

"...Why is that?"

 

I said what I was thinking out loud...

 

"Because I like Manato."

"Huh?"

 

I didn't understand what she just said.

 

"Like I said, I like Manato."

"...No, what are you talking about?"

 

What did she really even mean by that?

 

"I like Manato. How about you, Manato?"

 

If I was asked before, the answer to that would have been that I liked her as well.

 

"...I don't like Ayano."

 

But now it was different. Those feelings of love that I had for Ayano was completely gone.

 

"Why?"

 

What did you mean why?

 

"Hey, why don't you like me?"

"...Huh?"

 

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Why did she ask the reason why I didn't like her?

 

"Do you like that person after all?"

"That person?"

 

Who did she mean? Even when I racked my brains, I couldn't find the answer.

 

"That girl at your part-time job."

"...How did you know I was working part-time?"

 

Some kind of feeling sprouted inside my heart. A feeling of fear. How did she even know I had a part-time job? And about Hisai-san as well? I shouldn't have told anything to Ayano.

 

"That doesn't matter. So, you like that person after all."

 

I guess I was being misunderstood, but I didn't think anything of Hisai-san.

 

"I don't really have any feelings for her, though?"

 

I told her honestly.

 

"You're lying. Manato was smiling. You never smiled like that when you were with me."

 

Was I smiling? I couldn't remember.

 

"That's just a coincidence."

 

It was getting kind of troublesome...

 

"Then why did it have to be coincidentally that person? Not me?"

 

...

 

"Can I go now?"

 

Somehow, talking to Ayano was becoming a chore. And so, I asked her if she could let me go...

 

"Of course, not? We're not done yet, you know?"

"I don't have anything to talk to you anymore."

 

So I said as I turned my back to Ayano and started walking, but then she grabbed me by the shoulders.

 

"Hey, I told you not yet."

 

Ahh, what a pain in the ass.

 

"What."

 

I was a in a bit of a bad mood, and the voice of my voice dropped.

 

"D-don't get mad at me..."

 

Unexpectedly, Sayaka replied that.

 

"...I'm going."

 

I told her that and moved my feet again towards school.

 

"Manato..."

 

The girl behind him could only mutter so.

 

⸻⸻⸻ (ﾉ*ФωФ)ﾉ ⸻⸻⸻ TN Note: So, I saw a comment the other day that my translations weren't that great. That might be partly due to the author's writing style. He keeps on repeating words and phrases. Maybe it sounds better in Japanese, but it's janky and weird when translated as is.  There even times where that repetition spans multiple lines, and I'm already finding it hard to look for synonyms to those phrases so that the flow isn't too weird... （︶^︶） I might have lucked out a good writing style with Bad End Route.

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