Chapter 5: 5

Volume 1, Chapter 5: Relationships

 

The morning greeted me as usual, but now I had given everything up.

When I opened my eyes and stared at the ceiling for a while, I felt that this place wasn't my home. It couldn't be.

 

I had no one to call my family. That only person I could call that was my late father.

My father really cared about me. Even though he was always working so late, on days off, he would definitely take some time to play with me and Nana.

 

We were still kids back then. Which was why I was really happy that Dad entertained us, and we used to get so excited.

Dad...

 

I felt so nostalgic that I unexpectedly started to cry. I couldn't go back to that. Back to those days.

 

Actually, I just wanted to roll over my bed without doing anything today, but I couldn't do that because I had school.

All right, I should get up.

 

As I went down the stairs, my usual routine unfolded.

One woman moved busily around, and another sat sleepily on a chair.

 

"Oh... Good morning, Manato."

 

One woman called out me.

 

"Good morning to you, too. Maki-san."

 

I replied back to Maki-san who greeted me.

Maki-san was the one who was supposed to be my mother.

 

"!!! M-Manato?"

"Is there something wrong?"

 

Maki-san looked terribly upset. Did something happen?

 

"Eh, O-Onii-chan?"

"What is it? Nana-san."

 

I replied to Nana-san, who called out me next.

 

"W-what happened? You're talking like a stranger..."

 

What were these people so surprised about?

 

"What, you say, I just don't have a family to call my own."

 

When I told them this, their faces contorted in sadness.

 

"H-hey, Manato. What's wrong?"

"Y-yeah, Onii-chan. Stop talking like that."

 

There was nothing I could if you tell me that, because there was no bond that connected us anymore.

 

"It’s just that I realized. I've never been loved by anyone."

"Why would you think that?!"

 

Maki-san asked, raising her voice.

 

"Why, huh. Maki-san showed it to me numerous times. You always put work before me. Nana, as well. You've been ignoring me for the past six months."

"That's not it, Manato! That!"

"I-I didn't mean to ignore you...!"

"Rest assured. I don't care about you two anymore, so you don't have to try and mend things now."

"! Please, Manato, don't say that..."

"Onii-chan, it's all my fault! I'm really sorry, so please stop!"

 

These people didn't know how to listen...

 

"Please calm down. I understand. I won't bother you two, so I hope you let me stay at this house. Please."

 

They were both saying that out of concern for me. I knew that. I knew that, so bowed deeply and requested that of them.

 

"You don't have to do that, this is your home!"

"Please go back to how you always were, Onii-chan!"

 

...The usual me, you say. The me who never got to be loved by anyone, but kept on trying miserably, huh. I would never go back to that kind of me. Because I had come to know that from these past days.

That no matter how hard I tried, I would never be loved.

 

There was a saying in this world that hard work paid off, but that wasn't true. In fact, there were probably even more unrewarded efforts. I was one of those people. That was all there was to it.

 

"The usual me...what kind of person was he."

 

I couldn't figure that out myself.

 

"I'm going to school now. Oh, I'm grateful to be allowed to stay here, so I don't need money for breakfast."

 

After saying so, I made my preparations for school and headed out the front door.

 

"Wait!"

"Onii-chan!"

 

The two were calling out to me, but that was probably just on the surface. Deep down inside, they were most likely relieved that I, a foreign object, had disappeared from the family. Looking back at it, I seemed really comical for trying to hold on to this thing called family.

 

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"Good morning, Manato."

 

How many times did this make it? With that same line, Sayaka greeted me.

 

"Good morning."

 

Then, we started walking towards school.

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"Huh? You didn't buy breakfast at the convenience store today? Ah, maybe you ate properly today?"

"No, I haven't eaten."

 

I answered briefly.

 

"Eh?! Are you fine?"

"Oh, I am."

 

I said so without stopping my strides.

 

"...If anything happens, I'll listen to you, okay?"

 

Sayaka came up next to me and gave a worried look.

...I wished she stopped doing that kind of thing.

 

"I'm fine. Nothing's wrong."

"But you don't look like that, though?"

 

Moreover, Sayaka moved even closer to me. To be exact, she was close enough that our bodies were touching each other.

Like I said, I wished she would stop it.

 

"If I can help..."

"Haa."

 

I let out a big sigh.

 

"M-Manato? What's wrong?"

"Hey. Sayaka, you said you have someone you like, right."

"Eh?! Y-yeah."

 

Sayaka blushed to show her affirmation.

 

"If that's the case, then I wonder if you can please stop doing this."

"W-what do you mean by 'this'[1]?"

"Don't carelessly shorten the distance. For the most part, the person Sayaka liked was that senpai you talked to a lot, right?"

 

There was no doubt about this. I had never seen Sayaka's eyes glimmer like that before.

 

"...Huh? T-that's not it!"

 

She was in denial because I was right, but she was too embarrassed to admit it.

 

"I understand already. I'm going first."

"W-wait!"

 

Sayaka stopped me from behind by grabbing my shoulder.

 

"H-here."

 

Sayaka then held out a wrapped box in her hand.

 

"What's this?"

 

I asked.

 

"Manato, it was your birthday yesterday, right? That's why I gave you this as your birthday present."

 

...A day late, huh.

 

"...Thanks for the gift. But why today?"

 

I hated myself for asking this, but I wanted to hear.

 

"T-that's..."

 

Sayaka stammered. I stared into Sayaka's eyes.

Perhaps feeling pressured, Sayaka replied honestly.

 

"I forgot..."

 

...It was like that, as expected.

 

"Is that so."

 

I was sure she gave me the gift out of obligation as childhood friends. I didn't need such sympathy.

 

"Sayaka, from today onwards, we'll live as strangers."

"Huh? W-why?! Why are you saying that?!"

 

Sayaka greatly lost her composure.

 

"We've been together since we were kids!"

 

Right. Childhood friends. So, this childhood relationship was tying Sayaka down, huh.

If so, I should just cut off the source.

 

"Then, let's stop being childhood friends starting today. That way, Sayaka won’t have to worry about me anymore, right?"

 

I said that and started walking away.

 

"Why, for what reason..."

 

Sayaka was hung up behind me.

 

On this day, my relationships had changed.

 

Authors Note: 

What does he do for lunch and dinner other than breakfast? There was a question like that, but Manato withdraws money off an ATM and bought from the convenience store.

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