"Whu... What happened?" I asked, struggling to get up.
Ahsoka walked up to me, the first signs of the blue rash becoming visible on her cheeks.
She coughed, hand over her mouth, and leaned on the trees beside me, before extending a hand and force lifting me out of the mud.
"Thanks. My legs almost fell asleep in there." I said, only to recieve a smile and another cough.
"No reinforcements yet?" I asked.
"No." She replied, "And Offee... She hasn't woken up. This doesn't look good. I don't know if .... we'll make it out of here." She said, hopeless.
"Not if I can help it." I said, scraping off the mud from my jet exhaust, and gestured at the overturned ship.
"Cut out a part of the hull. I need some components. I'll repair my ship, and go bring you the cure."
Of course, my ship was completely fine. But she can't know that. I'll just make some idle replacements before I mosy on off to get the macguffin, one I had already kept at a ready weeks ago.
But what I was really going to get was something else. Or rather someone else.
General Grevious. He had been my captive for months now, but only after this official mission could I leverage him to the highest extent.
And so, as I searched Iego for the root, I would 'coincidentally' run into Grevious in one of his droid factories on the planet and after a bitter battle, I would end up killing him, rendering a great service to the republic.
Now that I was an official part of the republic forces, I was also liable to get medals and such for my services.
Medals that the politicians would likely milk for as much propaganda as they can, given that general 'Hunt' is giving them an 18 incher up their ass.
And these medal giving ceremonies will also include meetings with said politicians, giving me access to the senate house. Just as desired.
And once I'm in the senate house, well, that's that folks. The end of the jedi and the republic. The penultimate step of my plan fulfilled. With the relevant parties being none the wiser.
I picked up Offee, setting her inside the ship to keep her safe, while Ahsoka opened up the engine with her lightsaber.
After the engine was opened, I messed around within, acting like I was looking for something in particular before I picked out a random part from it, and walking over to my ship, stuck it in.
I pretended to check the engine, before making it 'miraculously' work, as the ship lifted off the ground.
"That's it then. You guys hide inside the ship now. And wait for help. I'll go get the cure." I said, cheekily, "And if I don't return, because you know, Iego of a thousnd moons is a planet with just that sort of a reputation, remember, the cure to the virus is the Reeksa root, found on Iego, deep within the separatists heartland. But I think that if they search the Coruscant botanical gardens, they'll probably find a cultivable sample. Even if they can't help you, they'll be able to help anyone else who gets the virus, from any other labs the separatists might have." I said, giving her clear instructions.
"Don't." She said, weakly, grabbing my gloved hand, "Don't talk like you're about to die. Please....." She coughed.
"Please come back to me."
"I'll try." I said, putting on a sincere face and pulled away.
My ship lifted off, and I put the metal to the pedal, rising out of the atmosphere, before I warped away.
Moments later, I arrived at the edge of the Naboo sector, scanned the surroundings.
No ships, no lifeforms, no signals.
Nothing.
Good, I thought, before I opened a portal, passing through it, appearing in the shadow of the Deliverance.
Another portal, and a simultaneous disguise later, I emerged from within my room aboard the Deliverance, as the Mon Calamari ace of the separatist armada, General Hunt.
I grabbed one of the many lightsabers I had looted from Grevious's hideout. This blue lightsaber, appropriately named LongShlong, with it's, let's just say 'mushroom-shaped' hilt, made from a dark brown Brylark wood casing.
Attaching it to my belt, I walked through the ship, first to the storage, grabbing a handful of Reeksa root, and then to the holding cells.
There lay before me two of the leaders of the separatist forces, both silent and compliant, though for entirely different reasons.
Count Dooku, was sedated and lobotomized, laying prone in one corner, while the other one, Grevious, had been disarmed, literally, by removing all his prostheses. Of course that wasn't enough to shut Grevious up.
No, that particular achievement came from months of malnourishment and sensory deprivation.
I walked into his cell, removing his sensory deprivator helmet, something I had made myself, and slapped him back to his senses.
"Good morning, Grevious. It's a beautiful day today, isn't it?" I greeted, but there was no response.
Woah. Did I seriously break him?
Great hunter Grevious, done in by a little starvation?
He wasn't dead, was he?
I went to check his breath, two fingers to his nose, when his eyes suddenly snapped open, and he jerked forward, chomoing down as hard as he could, trying to rip my finger off.
Too bad for him, I had a forcefield on 24/7. A better one, that pushed back twice as hard.
His jaws cracked back, flying away from each other like magnets with the same pole pulled close, and his nose bled, his sinus cracked from the impact.
"Tch tch tch!" I wagged my finger at him like one would at a dog that had just pissed on the carpet.
"Bad Grevious. Bad. Grevious."
"Kill me..." He finally begged, eyeing the liggtsaber on my hip, "Kill me already! Let me die a warrior's death!"
"What? No! Why would I do that? No no no no, you Grevious, will go like the dog you are." I said, picking up a syringe from the desk beside me.
"Euthanised when you are no longer worth keeping alive."
I pushed the needle into his neck as he shouted and writhed, as much as anyone in his position could at least.
"Please!" He cried, "Have some honor! You monster!"
"Honor is for fools and dogs. And you are both, Grevious. Goodbye." I said, my voice cold and cruel.
I injected the mixture into his veins, and I could see it take effect, as his eyes widened, fear and despair dripping rich from them, while his body seized, thrashing about violently.
For close to a minute, he struggled, suffering the worst pain of his life. His nerves burned and chilled at the same time, his guts roiled within him like a boat in a storm.
A severe urge to vomit took over him but his mouth would not move.
His body was his cage and he had become it's prisoner.
Not for long though, as before, the thrashing became weaker, the muscles torn and separated from fiber to fiber.
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And death came for him, in agony and relief.
I placed the syringe back onto the desk before pulling off the lightsaber.
Carefully, I sliced off the connectors of his prostheses, the ones where they met the joint, had they been there.
Then, I added another few nicks and notches on his torso, for flavour. Easier to make others believe it was a hard fought battle this way.
Then, with a form hand, I levelled the lightsaber at his throat and burned it through, leaving a smouldering hole in it's place, flesh scorched black as coal.
Then, it was my turn.
I took the saber to my armor, carving two good chunks of plating off of it, leaving grave scars, alongside another three dozen or so minor scratches.
Next came the hard part.
I popped in what passed for a painkiller in this universe and took a deep breath.
This was going to hurt.
I turned the lightsaber to myself, and positioned it next to my left rib.
I have to do this.
This is all for my future.
I have to do this.
I repeated to myself over and over, building up resolve.
Then, I shut off my forcefield, steeled my will and with a firm grasp, I pressed the lightsaber to my sides.
The armor began to melt, and my sides burned, the skin boiling off beneath the melting plate.
"Yrraaraaaaargh!" I groaned in pain, trying to keep my voice as low as possible.
But the pain was too much, and the saber fell from my hand, landing on the floor, burning through it, saved only by it's curvature, the penis shaped handle catching on the floor in a delicate balance.
I, on the other hand slumped against the wall, waiting for the painkillers to kick in, bring me some relief.
I popped another two just in case hoping to accelerate the effect.
I can always heal the wounds with Claire's blood. I told myself.
This is necessary. There can be no doubts.
There can be no chances.
A droid woke me up next, hours later, concerned at my state.
"You need treatment, general." It said in it's dull robotic voice, helping me to my feet.
"No. No. I ..I just need....call some droids over. Bring ...the prisoner to....actually, you know what? Just leave me. Get out." I ordered.
The droid's face flashed concerned lights before the programming kicked in and he got up, and turned around, leaving, with their signature, 'Roger, Roger."
Once it was out of sight, I picked up the lighstaber from the floor, shutting it off, and stood back up straight.
The painkillers were helping certainly, because I wasn't feeling the pain any longer.
It was almost too peaceful. It felt odd.
Not bad, just odd, like something was off.
Hehehehehe....
I giggled for no reason, before reason returned to me.
What? Was I just giggling.
I shook my head.
Maybe three painkillers was a bit much.
I brought up my hand, and checked the time. 17 hours had passed since I had come here.
Fuck!
How long did they have now? I remember the blue shadow virus kills within 48 hours. That's....uh...another 20 or so hours.
Eh, good enough.
I yawned, stretching, before the wpund on my chest ripped, scratching against the melt of my armor.
"Tsss!" I hissed, "Motherfuck-"
I took several deep breaths, pushing against the urge to rip the armor off and scratch at the burns, before hoking the lightsaber on my belt, and pulling out my portal gun.
I opened a portal beneath Grevious, before undoing his clasps.
He fell through the portal, landing in the backseat of my van, before I jumped in myself, slipping out the back, and entering back from the front.
Reeksa root? I patted my pocket and felt the roots within.
Check.
Dead Grevious? Check.
Proof of battle.....I could feel it on my side, scratching up beneath my melted armor.
Check.
The things I do for power!
I sighed, starting the engine.
Now then, let's get me some medals.
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