Chapter 43: Hooked on a feeling!

Waking up the next morning was...a sight.

Offee's face snuggled into the nape of my neck her dark purple hair tickling my nose was uncomfortable.

The movies really make this look cutesy but really, my arm had fallen asleep with Offee's weight on it and the stink of ... well sex isn't exactly pleasant. I don't get why people hold this as a sacred act. It just feels disgusting. Or maybe that's just post nut clarity at work.

I gently pulled my arm from under her and scooted out of the bed, dragging the blanket off of her, as she stirred to wakefulness.

"Uhnm~" she stretched.

"Where are you going?" She asked, grabbing me with the force.

"Offee, let go. I have work to do." I said.

"No!" She pouted.

I sighed. This is exactly why I never got into a relationship. Women are just a fucking chore!

I rubbed my temples and looked at her now naked body in full view against the morning sun and I have to say, dating a warrior has one perk. They are in ridiculously good shape.

But work needs doing and duty calls.

I tore my eyes off of her and coughed.

"Ahem. Look I will be back sometime later. And ....yesterday was...."

"It was good. Better than I have ever felt before. So come back to bed. Let's...try it again?" She gave me those puppy eyes again and.....ugh.

I hate that it's working!

It took ungodly amounts of willpower to resist the urge, but my mission comes first.

"Offee." I said, stern, "I am not in the military any longer and I have things to work out before I get my ship seized as 'discarded stuff'. And I have other duties. Salvage contracts to fulfill. Gotta make money somehow, you know?

Besides, don't you have jedi stuff to do?"

"I actually....." She took a deep breath and made a decision.

"I am going to leave the jedi order."

"Exactly- Wait what?!" I did a double take.

"I am going to take voluntary exile. The jedi order has failed me. I don't want to be part of it any longer. I think a lot of jedi are thinking the same. And this way, I can be together with you!" She explained.

"Offee, this...I don't know about this. What even are we?" I asked.

"I don't know." She replied, straightforward.

"See. I think you're just feeling under the weather and maybe the stress got to-"

"But I know what I want!" She interrupted, a lovestruck look on her face.

This is getting annoying.

"I want you! I love you! I want to be with you!" She said.

There we go!

I'm officially fucked.

I rolled my eyes at her, and she took it with a pout.

"Besides, I will get a tidy sum from the order as compensation when I leave the order, so you don't have to worry about money." She added.

"I'm not taking your money, Offee. I don't need your money. I have plenty of it to go around. And anyone who would love you only for your money doesn't truly love you!" I said, sitting back down.

I better deal with this now rather than have a love crazed psycho on my trail across the galaxy. I lied to myself.

"And... I'm sure that if you reflect on your actions and your feelings, you'll find that this is just .... I don't know."

I could see her eyes, so...pure and so full of ....fuck.

Fine. It pays to be honest sometimes.

Why deny the pot of gold that has fallen into my lap?

It's not like I'm good with women anyways. This might be my only chance to get a girlfriend!

And I don't want to grow old to be like Rick, sad and pathetic, hiding behind an armor of lies and sarcasm.

"Offee, this was my first time. I don't... I don't have any experience with love and relationships. And I'm afraid..... I'm scared I will mess this up. That I will hurt you."

Again.

"I don't want to take that chance. I don't like taking chances." I laid my soul bare and opened up for once in my life.

Offee sensing my distress, just took my hand and held it tight.

For some time, we just sat there quietly soaking in the moment.

"Then let me take that chance for you.....for us." She said finally, leaning into a kiss.

And for that moment, I wanted to believe her. And I buried that cynical, realistic part of me that was screaming to me that this won't end well. I buried it deep, and gave in.

My last mistake in this world.

As we parted, me going to the military office while she went to the jedi service core for her exile application, I put on my nekomimi headphones and Hooked On A Feeling by Blue Swede started playing.

There was a song in my heart and a skip in my step as I made it to the hangar that day. I was high on love, as corny as that sounds. I didn't care.

Even though deep down I knew that statistically the honeymoon period of relationships last all of four or five months and soon it would devolve into boring old routine. But in some ways I was looking forward to that too.

I was just that happy. Besides, I might as well enjoy it while it lasts. No sweat off my brow if the relationship fails.

I shrugged.

Once, I had finished with the paperwork and requisitioned my ship and odds and ends back, it was time to leave.

Offee met me at the cruiser pad outside the jedi temple holding up a holo scroll and a gold credit slate, a big smile plastered on her face.

"You got it!" I smiled.

"I got it!" She said, just as Anakin, Padme and Ahsoka walked out from the temple too.

Ahsoka was the one to spot us first and ran over waving.

"You promised we would talk after the assembly, but then just disappeared! That's some way to keep a promise." She huffed.

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"Sorry. It was a heat of the moment sorta decision." I laughed awkwardly.

"You're pretty shy for someone who just disbanded the jedi order less than a day ago." Anakin said, walking up.

"Your speech was inspiring, commander Walker." Padme praised.

"Please, it's just Walker now." I said.

"Oh right. You quit the military, didn't you? That's a shame though. You earned a soft spot in the hearts of many clones yesterday. You could have been promoted if you had stayed." She said, as I spotted her holding hands with Anakin.

That was when I noticed the same holo scroll and gold slate in his and Ahsoka's hands.

"You guys left the order too?" I asked.

"Yeah." Ahsoka chirped.

"You showed us the truth and after that we just couldn't stand it. Besides I was never well suited for the order anyway." Anakin said.

"Neither was I!" Ahsoka added, tapping her feet.

"What will you do now though?" I asked.

"We were actually hoping to charter a vessel to take us to Naboo. Padme and I are getting married. Then, we'll finish Ahsoka's training there for a few years. Afterwards, we'll see." He explained.

"I could get you a job with the royal guard." Padme suggested.

"Maybe." He replied, "But first let's get a vessel chartered."

"Actually." I interjected, "We were going to Naboo too. If you want, you can come along."

"Really? That's convenient." Padme said.

"Surprisingly." I replied.

"How much for the ride?" Padme asked.

"Nonsense. I'm not charging my friends for a ride. Hop in." I said, jumping into the driver's seat.

"I don't feel right doing that. Now that you're out of the military, you'll need the money too, won't you? We already owe you so much after you saved our lives, twice even." 

"Look Anakin, just relax. Don't mention it. Besides, the first time I got paid with a salvage contract so we're pretty even on that. Not to mention that helped me build up quite a nice nest egg. So I'm not strapped for cash right now. You two on the other hand are going to need it a lot more. Especially you newlyweds. Marriages tend to be expensive affairs." I said.

"I still feel bad." Ahsoka insisted.

"Then how about this? I'm going to go exploring west of the core for the ancient site of Mortis, home to the force gods. I could use a couple extra force users on hand. And you two could use an adventure."

"That sounds great!" Ahsoka replied instantly.

"Thank you." Anakin added.

"Don't mention it pal. There's no thank yous and sorrys between friends." I said, starting the engine.

Once we were up in space, and Coruscant was disappearing behind us, I saw them looking back at the planet they had called home for ever a decade, with nostalgia and a mild tinge of regret.

That's not worrying at all. I thought.

Setting the coordinates for the warp, I set it off on autopilot.

Now with time on my hands, I spotted the crease on Anakin's brow and asked.

"What's eating at you, Annie?"

"Nothing.....just, we left in the middle of a war. I wonder if it was the right thing to do? I mean I am a general and the soldiers, they trusted us. Admiral Yularen and Commander Rex even came to see us off. And...."

"Annie.... listen here. The world doesn't revolve around you. You are not the centre of the universe."

He raised an eyebrow at me as I continued.

"And I don't mean it in a bad way. It's...a freeing concept actually. The world, the galaxy, it was here doing just fine before you came, and trust me, it'll be fine long after you're gone. That gives you a certain amount of freedom, knowing that you'll be forgotten in the sands of time.

You don't have to worry about someone a thousand years from now cursing your name and saying, 'Oh that Anakin Skywalker! He ruined our lives. If only he had or hadn't done this or that, we'd be just fine!'

And besides, even if they do, what's it to you? You'll be dead and they would've cursed your name regardless.

And I know that doesn't sound very appealing. Not until you consider this.

You won't change the galaxy. No one will remember you. And you know what that means Annie?

You're free to do what you want, free to live a simple life with the ones you love, without having to worry about every last thing going on in the galaxy.

Free to carve out a little slice of heaven to call your own and start a family.

This exile is a second lease at life for you. So relax. Don't mess this up with unnecessary worries. Everyone else will be fine. So focus on the present, and on Padme beside you. After all, as they say, 'Happy Wife, Happy Life'. And you really don't wanna see what the alternative is. My father did, and he did not like it. Hence the orphan bit on my little backstory." I joked.

"I'm sorry about that!" Padme comforted.

"Eh, don't weep for the stupid, you'll be crying all day. As I said, it's lost in the sands of time. Forget about it." I replied.

"Thanks, Jay." Anakin replied, "You've given me something to think about."

At that I turned back and smacked him in the head, causing Ahsoka to chuckle.

"Thinking about it is literally the one thing I just warned you about and here you are!" I laughed, "Just take a deep breath, and relax. You'll need all that brainpower to plan that wedding. We're here, after all." I said, as the ship exited the jump, putting us outside of Naboo orbit.

I drove us down into the atmosphere, close to the surface.

"You're fine if I park it at the Naboo royal palace right?" I asked.

"Sure. We can make- hold on!" Padme realised.

"Is that why you are here?" She asked.

I gave her a cryptic smile and replied.

"What do you think?"

"After all that talk about relaxing and not worrying about everything, you are here to do exactly that!" She said.

"In my defense, that advice was for him and not me. Besides, someone has to do it. If not me, then who?"

"What are you talking about?" Anakin asked, confused.

"Yeah. What are you here to do?" Ahsoka asked too.

"It's quite elementary, my dear Ahsoka! I'm here to....."

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