Is this Hero for Real?
Is this Hero for Real?
Chapter 23
[Act 7] And Your Reputation?
Male Earthling Kang Hansoo, age 17.
Day 10 of getting drafted in a fantasy!
I’d finally, finally arrived in a civilized city after suffering from monsters and savages.
“Nice.”
It wasn’t picture-perfect like the scenery in fantasy genres, but it went beyond my expectations.
“You don’t look nice at all.”
“It’s because of the stench.”
“That’s from the humans all living near the city gates. Besides, we’re no different. Think about how long it’s been since you bathed.”
“Aha!”
“You especially stink, you took a bath in orc’s blood every chance you got. I’m saying the language barrier wasn’t the only reason people avoided you.”
“You really know how to hurt someone with words, don’t you?”
“Not as much as you!”
It would have been nice if I could wash up as soon as we reached the city, but I had a lot of livestock from the orcs.
“Mooo~”
“Baaah~”
There were merchants waiting to buy those trophies at the city gates.
‘Maybe I should also get rid of the stuff I hoarded from the gnolls.’
“Leave the gold. This is where you get rid of the things you can’t bring to the center of the city.”
“I can tell.”
There were humans selling a living, green pig.
And there were humans who were willing to buy it?
I thought things would get taken care of quickly thanks to those merchants, but the mercenaries I thought I befriended were already leaving.
‘How rude!’
“Don’t be too disappointed. The mercenaries go where they are assigned, so you will meet again soon. In guilds, bars, inns, stables, workshops, mills…”
“Why mills?”
“…Nevermind.”
[A certain god says eunuchs don’t need to know.]
‘The gods and demons are coming together to make me stupid!’
I wanted to say something, but that feeling went away as soon as I saw the heavy pouch of money and street food.
[Outsider]
I didn’t need to eat thanks to my Blessing, but I still had cravings for good food.
The smell of savory bread and cooking meat, the sound of oil popping, the array of fresh fruit…
Even the foreign fantasy language I didn’t understand!
“$ %$ #$~!”
“@$~! ^$~!”
“$, %@# $~!”
I felt like a foreign tourist.
I was getting excited, but the demon poured cold water over my mood.
“Wash up first. Even the most ill-mannered and uneducated mercenaries follow that etiquette.
“Did I say I wasn’t going to?”
Demon Kogmos had been holding his head high ever since we entered the crowded city.
His nerve!
It wouldn’t be pretty for him if word got out that he was a demon, but he was natural at pretending to be human.
That wasn’t all, either.
“We’re going to the tailor after we get a room and wash up. I need a spare set of clothes because of the Saintess, and I’m not even gonna get started on you. You looked homeless from the beginning.”
“You made a plan and everything.”
“You didn’t even know what a mill is, don’t think of me the same as you.”
“…”
I made a blatantly uncomfortable face, but the demon kept going.
“But before that, we should listen to what business the ladies have with us. They’ve been waiting for us this whole time.”
“They have.”
I could see Ladies A and B approaching us after paying for the luxurious carriage like a taxi.
“Kang Hansoo, $, Kogmo, $. @% ^% *%, (#& $# $?”
“Hm. May I first ask my buddy here?”
“$#.”
‘Ask me what?’
“They say they want to pay you back for saving them. For now, they asked if they could get the same inn as us.”
“All the better for me.”
[A certain god complains it’s not better at all.]
It looked like god was displeased again, but they’d loosened up quite a bit after learning I was a eunuch.
It was a relief, but upsetting.
[Outsider]
I was falling into depression, but it was even more upsetting because I felt completely fine. With my head, not my heart.
“Then it’s decided.”
“What about the mercenary guild, then?”
“Do as I say if you don’t want to get kicked out as soon as you step foot in the guild. Bathing and clothes come first.”
“Hmph.”
And so we headed to the most expensive inn in the city.
* * *
* * *
Slave…
It was the most degrading status to an Earthling, where even criminals had human rights.
It was obvious from how many works of literature criticized slavery in fantasy genres.
Then what about in real life?
“Woah…”
Oh Hanwoo couldn’t keep his mouth closed at the slave market in the middle of the city.
It resembled a superstore.
As big as it was, there were various ways in which slaves were displayed.
“It’s so big…”
“Oh! It got bigger!”
“Ahem!”
A young, muscular, dark-skinned man looked far in the distance.
Besides his handcuffs and collar, he didn’t have a single thread of clothing on him. On his neck were a price tag and a few lines of background…
But the female customers only seemed to care about his bottom half.
“How old are you?”
“Say something, anything.”
“…”
A gorgeously dressed beauty was sitting as still as a mannequin.
If it weren’t for the shackles slightly showing under her dress, she would have passed as a resting noble lady.
Next to her was a warning sign that read “you will be fined for touching!”
“Hurry up and get in.”
“Do you want another beating?”
The slaves with a good commercial value were generally treated well. The more rebellious or lethargic they were, the more miserable they became.
“Get out, kids!”
“How dare a beggar…!”
“Hey, you, stay still!”There were jacked guards and merchants bustling around everywhere.
And no minors allowed!
Fortunately, in this fantasy world, Oh Hanwoo was an adult who didn’t have any trouble getting in.
“Oh yeah! I don’t have a lot of time.”
It didn’t seem like he would get tired even if he looked around all day, but he had a clear goal of building a ‘harem’.
He had no determination or ideology to liberate the poor slaves. He only thought to buy pretty slaves.
[Special]
He didn’t have the eye for people or expertise in this area, but Oh Hanwoo didn’t have a care in the world.
As the main character in this world, he was sure of himself as long as he could find a diamond in the rough.
[A certain god of wind watches intently.]
[A certain evil god suggests a simple bet.]
[A certain immature god of dice agrees on the bet.]
[A certain god…]
Did the gods care at all that he gave up being a ‘Hero’?
Amidst all the divinities watching him, Oh Hanwoo busied himself looking at the slaves.
Nothing to see for the handsome boys…
But it wasn’t easy for him to find a female slave that fit his standards and preference.
“Oh? Look, it’s Oh Hanwoo.”
“You’re…”
Two boys walked straight towards Oh Hanwoo as soon as they found him.
“Are you here to buy a slave, too?” One boy amiably asked.
“Yeah… pretty much.”
“Haha! We thought the same. You left with money because you didn’t like the training, right?”
“It’s a secret.”
It seemed the boy didn’t know that he didn’t get trained at all since his first day.
The boy was acting friendly for the moment, but that meant he didn’t care about him.
That’s why Oh Hanwoo gave a sharp answer.
“Relax. We’re in the same situation, we gotta stick together. Oh! I’ll give you some useful information.”
“Useful information?”
“That old guy over there is the man in charge. If he finds out you’re a Hero, he’ll show you all the high-end slaves that aren’t on display.”
“Do you have a death wish?”
There was a warning on the contract that calling yourself a Hero meant a death sentence.
The boy waved dismissively.
“Of course not. But there’s nothing you can do if others peep at your status window, right?”
“Huh?”
“Your Hero’s Blessing will be exposed on its own, do you really need to call yourself one? It’s a contract loophole.”
“…I see.”
Just realizing you could peep at others’ status windows, Oh Hanwoo pretended to be calm.
“What slave are you going to get?”
“It’s a secret?”
“Oh really? I have a rough guess…”
“Is the man behind you yours? What a unique preference.”
The man looked like a bandit leader.
His aura was overwhelmingly intimidating, but it had to be all fake. This was a fantasy world.
The status window was the only truth.
“…Haha! Let’s see who you get.”
“Sure. Watch me.”
‘I’ll make you crazy jealous!’
“Come to the inn closest to the city East Gate if you wanna show off your slave. We’ll be waiting there.”
“Alright.”
Oh Hanwoo ran straight to the man in charge of the slave market the boy told him about.
***
The luxurious inn was more state of the art than most hotels on Earth.
A slime living in a big cauldron in the corner of the room was cleaning and doing the laundry on its own!
And it cleaned my body, too.
I didn’t need to bathe. All I had to do was lay down near the cauldron and the slime would come and eat up all the dirt and grime.
‘This slime… I want it.’
“…don’t even think about stealing it. Slime as well trained and smart as this one are extremely expensive.”
“How expensive?”
“Worth their weight in gold.”
“Damn.”
I poked the trained slime with my fingertips.
Jiggle jiggle?
It jiggled side to side as if to ask me what was up.
“Heh~”
Maybe it was just in my head, but was the texture on the slime a bit different than normal…?
Knock knock.
“The clothes you ordered are here.”
The demon slightly opened the door as soon as he heard the soft knocking and gave the worker a small tip for the pile of clothes.
Why would he do that?
“Kogmo. Didn’t you say we were going to go to a store in person later?”
“Change of plans. It’s rude to make them wait when you’re staying in this inn for free.”
“You mean the ladies?”
“Don’t tell me you didn’t even memorize the ladies’ names.”
“Uh… no.”
“You’re ruder than a demon! At least memorize the names of the ladies who paid for your expensive room.”
“You’re rude!”
How could he call me ruder than a demon?!
It was true I approached them for that intent, but I didn’t think we’d stay together for that long after being stuck in that carriage all day.
Instead, the mercenaries that I had actually tried bonding with were gone…
How upsetting.
“Just hurry up and change. Gentlemen must wait before their ladies are finished getting ready.”
“…”
“What?”
“I don’t know how you’re still not married.”
“Are you enjoying making fun of me?! Do you really not know?”
I knew he couldn’t get married because he was too weak, he told me himself.
That’s not what I was asking.
“Why don’t you marry a human?”
“…”
“Don’t cry.”
“That’s the worst! How far are you going with this?! Do you seriously marry your pet animal?”
“Of course I don’t.”
“Then shut up. If I was going to marry a human, I wouldn’t have risked my life to leave my hometown.”
“Alright.”
After getting changed, we waited for Ladies A and B to come to the inn lobby.
…They were taking forever.
Demon Kogmos was lightening up the mood, surrounded by ladies who worked at the inn.
“Hoho!”
“Oh my!”
And he still thinks of humans as pet animals?
I wished him divine punishment.
[A certain god looks displeased at the full wolf.]
“I completely agree with you, god… oh, they’re here.”
“Wow!”
“Woow…”
Ladies A and B walked down the stairs, waving towards us with the eyes of every man in the lobby facing them.
“%#$.”
“% #$?”
Demon Kogmos, who came back next to me, greeted them respectfully with a bow.
“Don’t worry about us. We just arrived as well.”
‘Wrong, you demon!’
We had waited forever.
“Tell them we want to eat first.”
“…We haven’t had a proper meal yet due to our long travels, would you like to dine first? I know a place you ladies would like.”
“$#. %$, Kang Hansoo #$ %.”
“$. @#$ $#, Kang Hansoo $ %$ #@.”
The ladies each said something while mentioning my name.
‘What about me?’
The demon was giving me a weird look.
“What?”
“…They said they’d like to dine, but they want to go to where you wanna go first.”
“Ooh!”
Leave the judgment to the demon who sees human ladies as pet animals!
“Humans or demons all go for the powerful… damn this world!”
“Kogmo! Let’s eat first!”
I was starting to like this fantasy world a little more.
____
____
Chapter 23: 23
Chapter 23
[Act 7] And Your Reputation?
Male Earthling Kang Hansoo, age 17.
Day 10 of getting drafted in a fantasy!
I’d finally, finally arrived in a civilized city after suffering from monsters and savages.
“Nice.”
It wasn’t picture-perfect like the scenery in fantasy genres, but it went beyond my expectations.
“You don’t look nice at all.”
“It’s because of the stench.”
“That’s from the humans all living near the city gates. Besides, we’re no different. Think about how long it’s been since you bathed.”
“Aha!”
“You especially stink, you took a bath in orc’s blood every chance you got. I’m saying the language barrier wasn’t the only reason people avoided you.”
“You really know how to hurt someone with words, don’t you?”
“Not as much as you!”
It would have been nice if I could wash up as soon as we reached the city, but I had a lot of livestock from the orcs.
“Mooo~”
“Baaah~”
There were merchants waiting to buy those trophies at the city gates.
‘Maybe I should also get rid of the stuff I hoarded from the gnolls.’
“I can tell.”
There were humans selling a living, green pig.
And there were humans who were willing to buy it?
I thought things would get taken care of quickly thanks to those merchants, but the mercenaries I thought I befriended were already leaving.
‘How rude!’
“Don’t be too disappointed. The mercenaries go where they are assigned, so you will meet again soon. In guilds, bars, inns, stables, workshops, mills…”
“Why mills?”
“…Nevermind.”
[A certain god says eunuchs don’t need to know.]
‘The gods and demons are coming together to make me stupid!’
I wanted to say something, but that feeling went away as soon as I saw the heavy pouch of money and street food.
[Outsider]
I didn’t need to eat thanks to my Blessing, but I still had cravings for good food.
The smell of savory bread and cooking meat, the sound of oil popping, the array of fresh fruit…
Even the foreign fantasy language I didn’t understand!
“$ %$ #$~!”
“@$~! ^$~!”
“$, %@# $~!”
I felt like a foreign tourist.
“Wash up first. Even the most ill-mannered and uneducated mercenaries follow that etiquette.
“Did I say I wasn’t going to?”
Demon Kogmos had been holding his head high ever since we entered the crowded city.
His nerve!
It wouldn’t be pretty for him if word got out that he was a demon, but he was natural at pretending to be human.
That wasn’t all, either.
“We’re going to the tailor after we get a room and wash up. I need a spare set of clothes because of the Saintess, and I’m not even gonna get started on you. You looked homeless from the beginning.”
“You made a plan and everything.”
“You didn’t even know what a mill is, don’t think of me the same as you.”
“…”
I made a blatantly uncomfortable face, but the demon kept going.
“But before that, we should listen to what business the ladies have with us. They’ve been waiting for us this whole time.”
“They have.”
I could see Ladies A and B approaching us after paying for the luxurious carriage like a taxi.
“Kang Hansoo, $, Kogmo, $. @% ^% *%, (#& $# $?”
“Hm. May I first ask my buddy here?”
“$#.”
‘Ask me what?’
“They say they want to pay you back for saving them. For now, they asked if they could get the same inn as us.”
[A certain god complains it’s not better at all.]
It looked like god was displeased again, but they’d loosened up quite a bit after learning I was a eunuch.
It was a relief, but upsetting.
[Outsider]
I was falling into depression, but it was even more upsetting because I felt completely fine. With my head, not my heart.
“Then it’s decided.”
“What about the mercenary guild, then?”
“Do as I say if you don’t want to get kicked out as soon as you step foot in the guild. Bathing and clothes come first.”
“Hmph.”
And so we headed to the most expensive inn in the city.
* * *
* * *
Slave…
It was the most degrading status to an Earthling, where even criminals had human rights.
It was obvious from how many works of literature criticized slavery in fantasy genres.
Then what about in real life?
“Woah…”
Oh Hanwoo couldn’t keep his mouth closed at the slave market in the middle of the city.
It resembled a superstore.
“It’s so big…”
“Oh! It got bigger!”
“Ahem!”
A young, muscular, dark-skinned man looked far in the distance.
Besides his handcuffs and collar, he didn’t have a single thread of clothing on him. On his neck were a price tag and a few lines of background…
But the female customers only seemed to care about his bottom half.
“How old are you?”
“Say something, anything.”
“…”
A gorgeously dressed beauty was sitting as still as a mannequin.
If it weren’t for the shackles slightly showing under her dress, she would have passed as a resting noble lady.
Next to her was a warning sign that read “you will be fined for touching!”
“Hurry up and get in.”
“Do you want another beating?”
The slaves with a good commercial value were generally treated well. The more rebellious or lethargic they were, the more miserable they became.
“Get out, kids!”
“How dare a beggar…!”
“Hey, you, stay still!”There were jacked guards and merchants bustling around everywhere.
And no minors allowed!
“Oh yeah! I don’t have a lot of time.”
It didn’t seem like he would get tired even if he looked around all day, but he had a clear goal of building a ‘harem’.
He had no determination or ideology to liberate the poor slaves. He only thought to buy pretty slaves.
[Special]
He didn’t have the eye for people or expertise in this area, but Oh Hanwoo didn’t have a care in the world.
As the main character in this world, he was sure of himself as long as he could find a diamond in the rough.
[A certain god of wind watches intently.]
[A certain evil god suggests a simple bet.]
[A certain immature god of dice agrees on the bet.]
[A certain god…]
Did the gods care at all that he gave up being a ‘Hero’?
Amidst all the divinities watching him, Oh Hanwoo busied himself looking at the slaves.
Nothing to see for the handsome boys…
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Obviously nothing for the handsome men as well…But it wasn’t easy for him to find a female slave that fit his standards and preference.
“Oh? Look, it’s Oh Hanwoo.”
“You’re…”
Two boys walked straight towards Oh Hanwoo as soon as they found him.
“Are you here to buy a slave, too?” One boy amiably asked.
“Haha! We thought the same. You left with money because you didn’t like the training, right?”
“It’s a secret.”
It seemed the boy didn’t know that he didn’t get trained at all since his first day.
The boy was acting friendly for the moment, but that meant he didn’t care about him.
That’s why Oh Hanwoo gave a sharp answer.
“Relax. We’re in the same situation, we gotta stick together. Oh! I’ll give you some useful information.”
“Useful information?”
“That old guy over there is the man in charge. If he finds out you’re a Hero, he’ll show you all the high-end slaves that aren’t on display.”
“Do you have a death wish?”
There was a warning on the contract that calling yourself a Hero meant a death sentence.
The boy waved dismissively.
“Of course not. But there’s nothing you can do if others peep at your status window, right?”
“Huh?”
“Your Hero’s Blessing will be exposed on its own, do you really need to call yourself one? It’s a contract loophole.”
“…I see.”
Just realizing you could peep at others’ status windows, Oh Hanwoo pretended to be calm.
“What slave are you going to get?”
“It’s a secret?”
“Oh really? I have a rough guess…”
The man looked like a bandit leader.
His aura was overwhelmingly intimidating, but it had to be all fake. This was a fantasy world.
The status window was the only truth.
“…Haha! Let’s see who you get.”
“Sure. Watch me.”
‘I’ll make you crazy jealous!’
“Come to the inn closest to the city East Gate if you wanna show off your slave. We’ll be waiting there.”
“Alright.”
Oh Hanwoo ran straight to the man in charge of the slave market the boy told him about.
***
The luxurious inn was more state of the art than most hotels on Earth.
A slime living in a big cauldron in the corner of the room was cleaning and doing the laundry on its own!
And it cleaned my body, too.
I didn’t need to bathe. All I had to do was lay down near the cauldron and the slime would come and eat up all the dirt and grime.
‘This slime… I want it.’
“…don’t even think about stealing it. Slime as well trained and smart as this one are extremely expensive.”
“How expensive?”
“Worth their weight in gold.”
“Damn.”
Jiggle jiggle?
It jiggled side to side as if to ask me what was up.
“Heh~”
Maybe it was just in my head, but was the texture on the slime a bit different than normal…?
Knock knock.
“The clothes you ordered are here.”
The demon slightly opened the door as soon as he heard the soft knocking and gave the worker a small tip for the pile of clothes.
Why would he do that?
“Kogmo. Didn’t you say we were going to go to a store in person later?”
“Change of plans. It’s rude to make them wait when you’re staying in this inn for free.”
“You mean the ladies?”
“Don’t tell me you didn’t even memorize the ladies’ names.”
“Uh… no.”
“You’re ruder than a demon! At least memorize the names of the ladies who paid for your expensive room.”
“You’re rude!”
How could he call me ruder than a demon?!
It was true I approached them for that intent, but I didn’t think we’d stay together for that long after being stuck in that carriage all day.
Instead, the mercenaries that I had actually tried bonding with were gone…
How upsetting.
“…”
“What?”
“I don’t know how you’re still not married.”
“Are you enjoying making fun of me?! Do you really not know?”
I knew he couldn’t get married because he was too weak, he told me himself.
That’s not what I was asking.
“Why don’t you marry a human?”
“…”
“Don’t cry.”
“That’s the worst! How far are you going with this?! Do you seriously marry your pet animal?”
“Of course I don’t.”
“Then shut up. If I was going to marry a human, I wouldn’t have risked my life to leave my hometown.”
“Alright.”
After getting changed, we waited for Ladies A and B to come to the inn lobby.
…They were taking forever.
Demon Kogmos was lightening up the mood, surrounded by ladies who worked at the inn.
“Hoho!”
“Oh my!”
And he still thinks of humans as pet animals?
[A certain god looks displeased at the full wolf.]
“I completely agree with you, god… oh, they’re here.”
“Wow!”
“Woow…”
Ladies A and B walked down the stairs, waving towards us with the eyes of every man in the lobby facing them.
“%#$.”
“% #$?”
Demon Kogmos, who came back next to me, greeted them respectfully with a bow.
“Don’t worry about us. We just arrived as well.”
‘Wrong, you demon!’
We had waited forever.
“Tell them we want to eat first.”
“…We haven’t had a proper meal yet due to our long travels, would you like to dine first? I know a place you ladies would like.”
“$#. %$, Kang Hansoo #$ %.”
“$. @#$ $#, Kang Hansoo $ %$ #@.”
The ladies each said something while mentioning my name.
‘What about me?’
The demon was giving me a weird look.
“What?”
“Ooh!”
Leave the judgment to the demon who sees human ladies as pet animals!
“Humans or demons all go for the powerful… damn this world!”
“Kogmo! Let’s eat first!”
I was starting to like this fantasy world a little more.
____
____
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