Chapter 1: Just VA Things

“You’ll never stop me now, hero! The Princess is mine, and soon, all of Rose Kingdom shall be under my control!” This was it, everything I had worked for. Everything I had prepared for came down to this final moment. If I failed now, all of my efforts would be in vain, and there’d be no hope of ever achieving my dream. I took a deep breath, “Mwahahahahahahaha!” I released the greatest evil laugh I had ever managed to produce. 

There was no greater feeling than pulling off the best villainous laugh at the precipice of the plot point in anything, much less a brand new video game that was sure to be an instant classic. I caught my breath and took off my headphones, catching a deep whiff of the stale air in the foam lined booth, before turning and seeking reactions from the developers watching me through the small window. They all looked confused. My evil sorcerer voice had left them stunned no doubt. 

I let out a sigh of relief, holding my head high with delight and satisfaction as I exited the booth and went into the control room to graciously, yet humbly accept the offer for the main antagonist role. Okay, it was time to put my game face on. Pun intended. As I entered the control room, everyone was already looking in my direction. I had it in the bag. The gig was as good as mine. 

The lead casting director, who also doubled as a game dev, stepped forward. “So Kris, that was a really great set but um–we already cast the evil sorcerer. I thought someone had told you.” 

Oh, well that was certainly an unexpected turn of events. “Wait, it's already been cast? Then why did you even ask me to come in?” I had spent the past week memorizing the lines, rehearsing in my room and making sure all of the influxes were perfect, just for this audition. 

“We thought that you were going to audition for some of the other characters. There’s a lot of voices we still need. Adam was supposed to have given you the update. I’m really sorry.” He stuck his hands in his pockets. A nervous habit I was all too familiar with. 

My soul dropped through the pit of my stomach, descending past the floor and into the world of Hades. But not the homoerotic Hades with hot furies and the half naked protagonist. The bad Hades, with eternal torture and whenever they talk about Hades, they say “Hey deez nuts”.

“Okay, that’s alright! I can do plenty of different characters. What about the Hero? I had to study his lines too when I was practicing the villain.” I just had to keep calm. No reason to cry or anything. I could still land a main role. 

The looks on their faces combined with the awkward silence, told me everything I needed to know. There was no hope of getting a big part. All my effort and time had been flushed down the drain. Like a kid with a hurt leg getting sent to a world with kangaroo warriors to defeat the overtly queer coded villain. How virtuous. 

“Here.” He picked up a piece of paper with a list of names on it and handed it to me. “This is a list of all the characters we haven't cast yet, and the types of voices we want for them. I just got a call this morning that there’s a bug we need to fix before anything else can happen. So we’ll give you a call in a couple weeks. The link we shared with you before has all the lines you’ll need to run for all the character auditions. You’re not bad. Just take the time to practice.” 

I managed to make it all the way back to my car before letting the tears flow. How could I have been so stupid? To think that I’d get my big break so quickly. What if Mom and Dad were right? I should’ve just gotten into the family business. Maybe then I could weld the broken pieces of my dreams back together. 

After driving home, crying some more, eating an entire pizza, and remembering how much I fucking hated metalworking. I decided to look over the list of characters for another shot at redemption. They were all nobodies! The butcher Delaney, The blacksmith Monroe, and farmer number four. I wanted to be a breakout character. Not another forgotten NPC who sends you on a fetch quest. That was all I had done. Looking over the list, the only main character left was the Princess. I laughed to myself, imagine me as a princess. A big flowing dress, elegant heels, a regal crown, and a fierce hairstyle to greet all the subjects as well as the hero who approaches my kingdom. The Hero would seek my hand in marriage, but I, the strong independent Princess, don't need no man. But ho, the hero removes their helmet to reveal long curly locks, and admits that she’s actually a girl! And I would have to accept her offer because who could deny the affection of such a tough strong woman who could easily pick me up and twirl me around……

I stopped and realized I had let my mind wander way too far off course yet again. I shook my head to try and snap myself out of my weird thoughts and decided it was probably best to go to bed and start fresh in the morning. If I was going to win over the casting director, I was gonna need some help. 

Making my way downtown, walking fast, faces past, and I'm fucking late! My lungs were working overtime as I raced down the street. Living in the city had plenty of advantages. I, however, was at a disadvantage, due to my severe lack of regular exercise. I would have normally taken the bus, but time, as well as every other force in the universe, seemed to be against me, and I missed it by two minutes. 

 It was my own fault. I had called every voice coach I could find online, and this one was the only one with any openings. They were unfortunately two miles from my apartment, and the only opening was at nine in the morning, you can imagine my panic considering I called at eight-thirty.

Sweaty and by some miracle only five minutes late, I burst through the door of the–dance studio? Doing my damnedest to catch my breath, I collapsed on the floor and looked around the spacious room. It was a much larger space than I was expecting. Horizontal ballet barres lined one wall with large mirrors behind them, while another was made up of just mirrors. In the center was a girl sitting in a chair staring at me like I had just burst in and keeled over like the disaster I was. Which, to be fair, was exactly what I had done.

“You okay there?” She said, with a perplexed look on her face.

I nodded and stood up. “Yeah, sorry I’m late. I missed the bus and had to run the whole way here.” 

“Oh geez. Well, here. Drink some water and take a seat. You’re gonna wanna stay hydrated.” She handed me a water bottle and gestured to the seat across from her. 

I wasted no time accepting, and proceeded to down almost the whole bottle before remembering that I, as a human, needed to breathe. I gasped for air as I realized my initial impression was probably not coming across as, how the kids say, “poggerific.”

She pulled out her phone and started typing, “So, What’s your name and pronouns?”

“My what?” 

“Your name and pronouns. How you would like to be referred to.” She gave me a look that wasn’t quite a glare, and wasn’t quite confused, but somewhere in between. It was like she was trying to size me up or something. 

My brain was trying to process the question. I knew pronouns were a thing, but no one had ever asked me about them before. I gave her my name over the phone, so why was she asking me again? Though, I suppose all kinds of people go to voice coaches. Not just nerds like me trying to land a role.

She sighed, “My name is Melanie, She/They pronouns. You can call me Mel though. So, what’s your name and pronouns?”

I got the feeling how I responded would greatly affect how this entire ordeal was going to progress. “Uh, my name is Kris, He/Him I guess? My friends call me Krissy.”

Mel raised an eyebrow, “He/Him, you guess?” 

Ugh, she was right, or wait, they? Both? Either way, it was weird saying out loud. That’s why I never bothered with pronoun stuff. It always felt wrong or confusing.

She began to type what seemed like a college dissertation into her phone before looking back up at me. “Alright, you said on the phone you wanna practice range and using different voices?”

Whew, thankfully all the awkwardness was out of the way and we could get down to business, to de-feat, the Huns. Except I wouldn't be the one dressed up as a different gender for my training montage. Who’d ever want to dress up like a guy anyways?...And fight people. That’s a very important addition to that thought. Yeah. 

“Yup, I’m a voice actor! And so far I’ve only gotten minor, bit roles. There was a huge opportunity for a new game coming out and I kinda missed my chance for the leads. But I want to be able to leave an impression and get something bigger than farmer number four. Your reviews online were all good. So here I am.” I reached in my pocket and pulled out the list of roles the dev had given me. “All the ones without lines through them are bigger, or characters I’d be okay with voicing.” I handed her the paper. 

She looked over the list for a moment, then typed up more things on her phone. “Okay, so we can start with some warm ups, try and gauge where you’re at and where you want to be. When is the deadline for this?” 

“In two weeks.” 

She looked up, her eyes told me that one of us was in over our heads, and I don’t think either of us knew which. “Alrighty then. I mean, I can help, but two weeks isn't a whole lot of time. Usually people come once a week or so for a few months.” 

My determination knew no limits. I had to lay everything on the table. “It’s either this, or go to work with my Dad trying to weld his broken dreams back together. And trust me, once I figured out we couldn’t make a real Iron Giant, I lost all interest in the business. So I’ll come. I’ll come every day. I’ll come twice a day. I’ll come anywhere and everywhere I need to. I’ll even come on the weekend. Whatever it takes to get better, I’ll come and do it.”

“Oh god, fine, sure. Just please stop saying the word, come. Now all I can think about is someone coming on The Weeknd, and that’s just–not the mental image I expected to have this morning.” She messed around on her phone again. “I have slots open at nine in the morning all this week and next. We can do it if you want. But I can’t guarantee any miracles.”

Mel set her phone down, and our session began. We started with some vocal warm ups. Going through the vowels in different tones and pitches. She had me run through some sample lines, gauging where I was in different ranges. I performed some of my best monologues. A few clips from roles I had landed, some movie quotes, even the Glad0s revival speech. All my best, out on display.

Mel sat there, thinking to herself for a moment. She typed some more into her phone, I assumed it was where she made notes. Probably about how well I was doing. I was definitely going to get a good grade in voice lessons. Something that is both normal to want, and possible to achieve. 

“Okay, it sounds like you’ve got the basics of altering pitch down, but we need to work on your resonance and comfortability. You can get into the voice, but you need to learn how to keep it consistent and really make it yours. So, I’m gonna rattle off some lines and voices for a few characters, and I want you to repeat the lines, in your best imitation. I think it would be best to narrow it down to just a few to aim for. If you try for all of them, things are just gonna get a bit jumbled. Plus we wanna make sure you’re not over exerting yourself.”

I nodded in agreement as I gulped down water like it was the greatest thing I had ever put in my mouth. 

“Welcome weary traveler. You’re sure to be Inn for a treat during your stay.” She recited the line in a surprisingly gruff voice. 

I cleared my throat and repeated the line, “Welcome weary traveler. You’re sure to be…” I started coughing up a storm. 

Trying to do the deep raspy voices had always messed with me. I loved my Batman impression, but it was always so hard to do without hacking up a lung. Mel shook her head and made a few marks on the paper I had given her. She waited for me to catch my breath before resuming.

We went through several characters, going over how they would sound, what little tricks I could do to keep an accent or voice steady. Mel sure had a lot of range. I mean, I assumed she knew what she was doing considering this was her job. But I had never met a real voice coach before, so I didn’t have much in the way of comparison. 

“Okay, last one…I’m a pretty princess. Save me, hero!” She let out in an overtly feminine voice I had not heard from her so far. 

“I’m a pretty princ–wait, what?” Where the hell did that come from?

“What?” The smirk on her face was something that made me feel lots of different things. But I was too thrown off to notice what those feelings were. “You said, all the characters not crossed off were ones you wanted to try. The Princess is very clearly not marked out.”

“But–well–I mean, come on. That’s a girl character. There’s no way I’d be able to pull off a convincing girl for that long! The most I’ve ever done is a few phrases!” I turned around and covered my mouth. The weight of my unintentional admission coiled around my chest, and dragged me down to the dark abyss below. 

 “But you have practiced it?” The tone of her voice made it apparent that any excuse I could come up with would be taken with the largest grain of salt. “I’m sure you would make a very convincing girl if you tried.” 

There were countless studies on language theory, and how different accents and pronunciation could drastically change how the same language is spoken. But, there was no dialect in the world that could decipher the attempt at words I tried to make. I could’ve slammed my hand on random letters on a keyboard and it would have made a more cohesive sentence. 

“Though, for someone with such confidence as a ‘He/Him I guess’ like you, I’m sure you wouldn’t be interested at all in being a princess. A regal woman with gorgeous flowing hair, and any outfit in the world to choose from. Having to be saved by the hero who scoops you up in your gown, and carries you off to safety.” 

I couldn't see her face, but there was no doubt in my mind that she was making a sadistic grin. Who wouldn't want that? To be the damsel in distress, and be held in someone's arms and told everything was going to be okay. To be able to dress however you like, and have your own style. But we couldn't all have that. Some of us weren’t allowed to. Some of us were just–

My incessant gushing was interrupted by the sound of Mel’s phone beeping up a storm. The session was over. I took a moment to compose myself before turning back around to Mel.

“You doing okay there?” She asked as she silenced the alarm.

My heart was pounding, my cheeks were red, and I had butchered the English language worse than a minion. I was pretty far from okay. “Yeah, I’m doing fine!”

“Right…” Her voice was dripping with sarcasm. “So if you were serious about–for the lack of a better term–coming every day this week, I have open slots at nine in the morning.”

 “Yup, sounds good. I’ll see you tomorrow.” I quickly stated, as I started to head for the door. 

“See you tomorrow then Krissy. Remember to stay hydrated. Or else.” Mel called out as I closed the door to the studio behind me.

 

My thoughts moved faster than my feet as I made the trek home. Why did the thought of being a convincing girl make me feel so weird? And what did she mean by “or else”? Was I going to get in trouble for not staying hydrated? Wait, no, that’s stupid. It’s just so my voice won’t get all fucky. She had a point though, the Princess was the last real main role that was available. Not to mention, I would be more useful as a voice actor who could pull off both genders. Maybe I could try out honing my girl voice…for no other reason than to land the part and make money. Yeah, it was for my career. The buzzing in my chest and weird tingling in the rest of my body was just excitement for this to be a launching point. Plus, imagine all the surprised looks on everyone's face when they realize the super cute girl playing the princess is actually me. I wonder if they’d have me cosplay as her at the release, or a convention? 

My flesh vessel halted in its tracks. What the hell was I thinking? Was I actually considering this, actually getting excited about it? Why does my mind keep going back to such thoughts? I needed to face facts, I’m a guy. The weird fantasy about a dude being able to pass himself off as a girl was something that only happened in stories, on sketchy sites that you have to clear your browser history after reading, right? Or–was that something that could actually happen? Ugh, of course it wasn’t. I just needed to drop it. 

 

The clickity clack of my keyboard rang throughout my room as I had in fact, not dropped it. After indulging in some chocolate I stole from my roommate, I started to look up pronoun stuff. I was halfway into the bag of decadent delights, as I read countless pages and posts about pronouns and gender identities. It really makes you wonder about yourself. If so many people felt they were different from how they were born, or perceived, then why doesn’t everyone just try out whatever they want? Why wasn’t it normalized in our society for people to dress and present however they wanted to? To be who they wanted to be…Oh right, the bigots. People who had blatant disregard for those they didn't understand or viewed as different. 

Fuck, that’s when I realized I had barely referred to Mel as “they” the entire day. They had said “She/They” pronouns, but what did that mean? Was it a half and half situation, or just to be used interchangeably? Research had only told me that it was different for everyone in what they preferred. I could ask the following morning though, I just needed to not be an asshole about it. 

 

I was violently interrupted by my roommate flinging open my door. "Yo Kris, have you seen my chocolate?"

Well, fuckle. 

"What the hell dude?" He snatched the bag off of my desk. 

“I can explain. It started out with a kiss.”

“Well, how did it end up like this?”

“It was only a kiss!”

"Oh, it was only a kiss?" He held up the half empty bag.

I was caught red handed. “I’m sorry, I start to snack when I get anxious.”

He started to look at the browser on my screen, to which I had panic-closed as soon as he burst in. I’d been caught off guard enough times that it was a reflex at this point. 

“What’s got you so out of whack? Did the audition thing not go well?”

“Yes and no.” I ran my hands over my face in frustration, remembering my valiant effort that had been in vain. “I put on my best performance as the villain. I was going for Skeletor, but sexy.” 

He gave me an all too familiar look of perplexion, disappointment, and the slightest hint of trying not to laugh. “Well how could they not love that?”

“I know right?” I immediately responded, ignoring his obvious sarcasm. “Bone Daddy would’ve been proud!” 

“Aaaaaand you made it weird. Just do me a favor, next time you wanna gorge on candy, buy your own.” He got up and proceeded to leave me to my own cursed thoughts.

In his defense, I did have a tendency to exist outside of normal dude behavior from time to time. But that was because I had talent, and talented people always pushed the boundaries of what’s normal. Right?

 

The next morning came like the food at a failing restaurant, suspiciously too quick and wildly underwhelming. I’d expected to wake up feeling charged and ready to start my next session with Mel, but I had a sense of dread hanging over me. I couldn’t quite nail down what had me out of sorts. Though I wasn't about to be late again. I had a mission, to be the very best, like no one ever was. 

 

Walking into the dance studio humming the Pokemon theme song to myself, I was greeted by Mel sitting in one of two chairs just like the previous day. “Good morning sunshine! I see you decided to be on time today. Did you decide on which voice you want to focus on?” They shot me a smirk.

“Um, yeah. I did.” My stomach began to knot up. “I think I wanna go for the main castle guard, and the blacksmith.” 

Mel pulled out their phone and typed up a storm. "Okay then, let's get started."

"Actually, before we do that, I'd like to apologize."

They looked at me quizzically. 

"I know I kinda fumbled around with pronoun stuff yesterday and pretty much only referred to you as she and her, even after you stated you also use they. I did some homework and research last night and I just wanna make sure I'm being respectful."

They smiled, "Thanks Krissy. I appreciate it. You can use she and they interchangeably. Or one, one day and the other the next. As long as people try I'm generally happy." 

Part of the knot in my midsection unfurled. But there was still something eating at me. If only I could pinpoint what it was. 

 

After warming up, we got to work on nailing down the voices and accents. Mel was really tough with the adjustments. I never realized how much slightest tone or pitch change could make or break a good character voice. Maybe I wasn’t as great as I initially thought. 

“No, you need the changes to be more subtle. You want to alter your regular voice, not always change it entirely.” Mel said while sitting down and reaching for their water.

I let out an exasperated sigh. She was right. I was going to burn out quickly if I kept up the voices for these characters too long. “I just want them to be different–distinguishable, you know.” 

“You can do that with just minor changes. You don’t have to overhaul each one to be so distinct. Things will be a lot harder for you if you do that for every voice.” 

 “But, when I do different voices–I don’t sound like me.” Maybe it was because I was getting frustrated, maybe it was because I was so unsure of myself, maybe there was something about Mel I felt like I could trust. I’d never actually admitted that to anyone before. 

They gave me a look, one I couldn’t really place. I began to look around the studio, trying to stare at anything but Mel. The barres along the side wall, the mirror that was the back wall, the piano in the corner. The acoustics in the space were truly superb. I suppose that’s why she used it for this kind of stuff. Finally, I turned my gaze back to her. She opened her mouth to say something, right at that moment the alarm went off. 

I scooped up my bag and headed for the door. 

“Krissy…” Mell called out.

“I’ll see you tomorrow.” I said as I hurried out and down the stairs. 

 

“What the hell am I doing with my life?” I muttered as laid on my bed, staring into the endless void that was my ceiling. 

The entire point of voice acting was to take on a role. To become someone else for a while. To not have to be yourself. Wasn't it? Method actors did it all the time. They disappeared into the roles. Though, it’s weird how no one ever method-acted a kind person. None of that explained why I was so fucking bummed about settling for the minor characters. I tried to convince myself that it would be just as good, a stepping stone in my career. But, there was something bugging the hell out of me. I lifted the paper up and stared at it until my vision went blurry. My eyes came back into focus on one spot, one line. Princess Rose. 

You know that feeling when something startles you? And your skeleton briefly tries to escape your meat suit and wreak havoc on the unsuspecting and squishy mortals of our realm. That was me when my phone rang, causing me to jolt upright. 

“Hello?” I said in a panic. 

“Yo Kris! We’re hittin up the weed bar, High Spirits. Come hang bro!” My already intoxicated friend blurted through my phone. 

I contemplated joining them, nothing like hanging out with friends to take your mind off things right? But…I couldn't help it. I held up the paper once more. “Sorry dude, but I’ve got some things to take care of. Have fun.” I hung up.

You are reading story Just VA Things at novel35.com

In, and out. Air filled my lungs as I took deep breaths preparing myself for what I was about to do. The repercussions would certainly come into full swing at some point. But I had a mission, and I was going to accomplish it. 

“Save me hero…save me hero…Save me hero! I am Princess Rose and you will not speak to me with such impugnance! I am Princess Rose….I am Princess Rose…” My most valiant effort at a girl's voice came out. I would get a main part in the game, no matter what.

 

The rest of the week went by seemingly in a blur. I’d show up on time, Mel would be sitting, waiting for me, and we’d begin the lesson. She kept pushing me, but in a good way. Not the physical, shove you on the ground and stare down at you, way. Well, I guess good isn't the right word in that comparison. I definitely wasn't thinking of things like that or anything though. She just–had a way with what she was doing. I kept getting nervous and asking about raising my inflection and pitch in a comfortable way. I couldn't let them know I was secretly practicing Princess Rose at home. I always got the side glance, the weird knowing stare. But that was just the energy they exuded. I’d ask my little discreet questions, and they’d be none the wiser and I’d get a perfect girl voice in no time!

 

The following week, I felt like I had a good traction going. My voice was getting better and girlier with each day. Not to mention Mel had really stepped up her game with the tips. I learned about resonance, and even how to keep it going for an hour at a time. I also played a clip for my roommate and he said it just sounded like a girl. But the truth was, it was me! I couldn’t stop blushing the entire night after he had said so. It was really affirming to know that I was finally able to pull off a real role. Just like a plan to kill an emperor, it was all coming together. The problem however, was that I was doing it so much, my body decided to betray me. 

“The castle gates are secured he-RO…” My voice, like the shell of an egg, cracked right in front of Mel. My hands covered my mouth faster than my mind could even react to what had just happened. 

For how embarrassed I was, Mel didn’t seem to care, considering she had a giant grin  plastered on her face. “That was certainly something. But I’m not sure the castle guard would say it quite like that. Maybe if you went a few octaves higher. I mean, while we’re at it, we could practice another role entirely. What do you think, princess?”

My cheeks became a literal definition to the phrase, beet red. “What?! How? How did you know?” 

They rolled their eyes, “I mean, I wasn’t entirely sure until just now. But come on, Krissy. You’ve been asking for tips to raise your voice, every day you come in with a slightly higher inflection. And just now, your voice cracked exactly like mine did when I first started voice training. Toss all that together with the general vibe you put off and it’s not very hard to see you're, at the very least, questioning your gender identity.”  

What the fuck? I mean, yeah I had been googling a lot of stuff, learning about pronouns, gender, and trans people. But I was just trying to be a better ally. Sure I related to everything and may have gotten really excited over the fact that I was sounding like a girl. But I wasn’t questioning anything! I was just trying to not think about the fact that I wanted to be a girl…

“Fuck.” I slumped down in the chair. 

Mel sat across from me, typing in their phone like they always do. “So,” they looked up at me, “my next couple appointments just canceled. Why don’t we take a break and go get coffee? My treat.”

I nodded my head, we gathered our things and walked to a small café down the street. My mind was trying to think of any excuse as to why I couldn’t be a girl. By the time we entered the shop and were blessed by the sweet roast of the gods, I had only thought of one reason, it’d be scary to come out. To actually face my problems instead of trying to funnel it into a character or angsty fanfic.

We gave our order and I awkwardly sat down across from Mel. Trying my damndest to keep my composure. She seemed content to sit in complete and utter silence as I began to wrack my brain trying to figure out a way out of this situation. But I suppose the truth was, that there was no way out of it. Only to work through it. 

“You were right.” I finally broke the silence between us.

She gave me another wide grin. “Right about which part?” 

I threw up my hands in a slight huff. “All of it. You were right about everything. I’ve been practicing my girl voice in secret so I could try out for the princess. I thought I was doing a good job of keeping it hidden, but I kept doing it more and more until it bled into my regular voice. Not only that, I kind of like it. Ever since we met I’ve been trying to do more research on pronouns and gender so I could be a good ally. But I ended up staring down the barrel of the truth that was right in front of me all along.” 

“...and that truth is?” Mel made a ‘please elaborate’ gesture. 

I let out a long and deep sigh. “That I want to be a girl. I’ve never been particularly happy as a guy, but I always had an excuse. Plus I could always disappear into a character or role to play. I think I’ve known for a long time, I just couldn't face it. I didn't have the words for it. But now, doing all this, seeing how confident you are in everything, and the glowing my cheeks do when I hear the recordings of myself. I can’t deny it anymore.” 

She reached out and wiped the tear from my face I hadn't even realized was there. Then placed her hand on mine. “I’m proud of you for being honest with yourself. I know it’s not always easy, but now you can focus on being who you want to be.” She smiled even more, “Plus, now I can be extra tough with the vocal training. We’ve got less than a week and I need to see where you’re at so we can turn you into a proper princess.” 

My audible flustered noises were interrupted by the barista bringing our order to the table. “One cappuccino for Mel, and a flat white for Krissy.” The overtly cheery voice was always unsettling considering I knew first hand that most baristas prayed for death on a regular basis. 

“Um, speaking of which, I have a confession to make.” I stammered out. Mel looked at me with an interested eyebrow raise. “None of my friends actually call me Krissy. They just call me Kris, I tell new people to call me Krissy cause it’s more feminine sounding.”

They stifled a chuckle, “Jesus, you adorably dense bitch. You’re gonna be so fun to tease.” 

My face was going to shut down from all the overheating it had been doing in such a short time. Did Mel really think I was adorable? I could only imagine what teasing was going to be like. She had already been poking fun here and there. The way she stared me down, or got in close to run her fingers on my neck to help me know where to adjust my voice. Not to mention the one time she shoved me against the wall and…wait, that was a dream I had. Fuck, I had to focus, I was rambling in my own head again. 

“I guess the real question is, what do you wanna be called now? There’s no rush in picking out a name, I went through a few until…”

“Kristal!” I blurted out before I even had time to think. 

Mel giggled, “Oh you have thought about this a lot, huh?” 

I took a large sip of my coffee, “Maybe. It was the name I always used in video games whenever I could pick a girl character.”

“I hope you realize how dorky that is and I love it! I think this is gonna be great, Kristal. Let’s take these drinks back to the studio, I’ll get a good listen to you and we’ll go from there. Sound good?” 

 My heart fluttered, my eyes watered, my hotel trivago’d. Hearing someone say that name out loud felt like taking a bath in pure serotonin. I nodded, things weren't going to be easy peasy lemon squeezy. In fact, from what I read online, things were going to be difficult, difficult, lemon difficult. But I knew it was the right choice. And I was lucky enough to have someone as cool as Mel to give me some tips. 

 

During the walk back to the studio, it was as if a giant weight had been lifted. I could actually imagine a future that didn't involve wasting away in the family business. There were options. Even if the voice acting thing didn't work out, it would be okay. It wasn't either or, it was just–different. I had a whole new life to live. Once I nailed this princess of course…I would have to work on my phrasing though. 

We entered the studio and Mel had a different air about her. She was excited, like it wasn't just a lesson anymore. She snapped her fingers which immediately had me at attention. I would also have to try and learn how to exude that type of well earned confidence. Not my usual fake facade I put on all the time. 

She instructed me to recite the lines in my newly acquired girl voice. I happily yet nervously obliged, it was the first time actually doing it in front of someone. Once my performance was over Mel took down more notes, then began to go in depth about resonance and the difference between pitch and tone. Once the lesson was over we ended up talking for a little bit. She gave me some info for local LGBTQ+ groups and centers. We talked about games, music and movies. The thing that threw me off though, well, not just threw me off, more like ejected my body into the stratosphere. Was when she ruffled my hair and told me that I had been a, “very good girl.” 

 

Sleep avoided me that night. Like the Jacksonville Jaguars avoided winning. I couldn’t get that interaction out of my head. They way Mel looked at me, and called me a good girl. It sent chills throughout my body. I’d never been so incredibly flustered in my entire life. It had taken hours for my cheeks to return to their normal color. But one thing kept me focused, the fact that I was sounding more like a girl! I was going to give it my all, even if I didn’t get the part I could be proud of how amazing my voice was. 

The next few days went about the same. I’d show up and Mel would coach me, I’d get all flustered by something she would say or do. Like moving in real close and looking down at me, poking fun at how unmasculine I’d been, and when she said that I could probably make all kinds of fun noises. Not to mention my lighting up at every time they called me Kristal. Truly, I was a mess of a girl. Hehehe, I was a girl. Nothing could ever take that away from me. 

 

In the blink of an eye, the day of the audition came up. The lead dev had texted me the time and place. The bundle of nerves I called a body made its way up to the recording studio and into the booth. Long gone was the cocksure Skeletor impersonator that was standing in that very spot just a couple of weeks before. Now there was only a girl, standing in front of a microphone, begging to be saved by the hero. 

“Save me Hero! You’re my only hope!...You’ll see, the Hero will come and, sniffle sniffle, he’ll come and rescue me…How dare you speak to me in such an arrogant tone! I am Princess Rose, and this is my kingdom. If the Hero won’t stop you, I will!...AAAAGGHHH!” 

I’d given everything I had. My absolute best. I took off the headphones and made my way into the control room, this time not daring to look directly in anyone's eyes. I was so nervous as to what they would think. 

“So, Kris, that was–um…” 

Time is relative. Maybe that’s why it always seemed to elude me the way it did. Some days felt like minutes, while sometimes, seconds could feel like an eternity. Time never meant much to me before. Everything was predetermined. It would happen one way or another. Get a job, get a wife, have kids, eventually die. But I no longer felt tied to that anymore. While the moment seemed to last a lifetime, I still had a lifetime to live. That gave me hope. I looked up at the dev.

“That was surprisingly well done. I have to admit I was not expecting you to audition for the princess. But, well, you gave us a pretty damn good princess in there.” He looked a bit nervous and shocked himself. 

“Oh gosh! Thank you so much. I’ve been practicing and really putting in the effort to nail the princess–role.” Damn me and my poor phrasing. 

The dev chuckled. “Well you certainly nailed her alright. I will have to talk with the rest of the team about having a guy voice the role, But I’m sure they will consider it once they hear the recording.” 

My stomach knotted up. I took a deep breath, I could do it. “Um–actually. About that. I’m uh, actually not a guy. I’m transgender. I kinda just figured it all out so I’m still learning a lot of stuff. But, my name is Kristal now and I use She/Her.” Internally, my entire soul was screaming and begging to be released from its meat sack. 

There was a short pause. “Oh, well that’s cool. Congratulations. We do try to take pride in working with a diverse staff. I’ll be sure to update your name on our file then. It’ll be another week or so as we have a few more people to audition. But we’ll let you know as soon as the decision is made.” 

He reached out his hand which I awkwardly shook and made my way out of the building. Once outside I quite literally jumped for joy and let out the deepest sigh possible, releasing all of my tension. My body was alight with nerves but I had never felt more proud of anything before. He liked it, he liked my voice! My girl voice! I quickly pulled out my phone and texted Mel giving her an update. She responded almost immediately with a bunch of emojis and offered to take me out to dinner to celebrate. No one had ever offered to take me out before. I mean, surely she was just being nice, considering how much she helped me with my voice, right?

 

A week went by at light speed. I’d been so absorbed with the process of figuring out all the next steps I needed to take with being a girl, the call took me by surprise. I answered and was greeted by the voice of the casting director/game dev. 

“Hey Kristal! We finished the auditions and after heavy consideration with my team, we’ve decided to move forward with you as Princess Rose. If you’re still interested of course.”

There’s a moment when you start vibrating with excitement and energy. Like when you’ve drunk four cups of coffee and wind up being walked home by a really pretty girl, you stare into each other's eyes, wondering what’s going to happen, right when she leans in and kisses you. That kind of excitement. 

“Yes! Absolutely yes! Oh my gosh, thank you so much!” My voice hit a higher pitch than I was expecting it to. 

The dev laughed, “Great, we’ll send over details and an official offer in the morning. Congratulations.” 

I hung up and did a stupid little happy dance. I didn't even care that I was in public. I was going to be in a lead role in a video game, the lead girl role! There were so many people I had to tell…and have awkward conversations with about my gender identity. But first I had to tell Mel. I practically jumped up and started heading towards the dance studio. 

So, speaking of girls who make you feel all floaty and energetic. That kiss had happened between Mel and myself. During the week we’d gone out almost every night. Talking, having fun, learning about each other. Their friend actually owns the dance studio, she just lets Mel use it for voice lessons during off times. We also shared a lot of interests, music, games, some hobbies, and it was just really nice. Not to mention I had the distinct feeling she was flirting with me, but I didn’t want to be presumptuous. That is, until I essentially melted in their arms as we kissed. My cheeks were getting flushed just thinking about it again. 

Bursting into the dance studio, Mel was sitting in one of the chairs typing in her phone. She looked up at me.

“Hey cutie, this is a pleasant surprise.”

I took a second to catch my breath and also not blush too hard at the compliment. “I got the part!” 

“Fuck yes! Way to go Kristal!” They jumped up and ran over to give me the biggest hug. “I’m so proud of you!”

There was nothing I could do but giggle uncontrollably. It was amazing, I had my dream job, I was in the arms of the cutest girl I knew, and…my thoughts were cut off by Mel’s lips pressing against mine. Everything washed away as I began to turn to putty in her hands. My arms wrapped around her. I couldn't help but make slight whines as her hands slid up my sides, to my neck, and around my face. 

Mel pulled away from the kiss, “You’re so incredibly adorable. I hope you know that.” 

A sound came from me, something I never once thought possible. I was purring, like, legitimately purring at the notion that they found me adorable. “M-m-maybe.” I managed to squeak out.

The delightfully sadistic giggle from Mel only reassured me that I was becoming cuter by the day. “Well, I think we should have a proper celebration. What do you say?” I felt their hand lower down my back and squeeze my ass. “Unless, you don’t want to get too physical. I completely understand either way. You can always say no.” 

God I literally wanted nothing more than for her to push me around and step on me. There was no denying it anymore. I wanted to be a girl, with a girl. I nodded, “Y-yes please. I’d like that very much.” 

“Mhmm, good girl. Follow me.” 

Mel grabbed my hand and led me over to the ballet barres that lined a wall of the studio. “Now, on your knees.” Her tone was sharp. 

My body complied before my mind had even processed the command. I sank to my knees and looked up at Mel, a devious smirk plastered on their face. 

“Shirt, off.” She said as she walked over to her bag by the chairs. 

I did as was told and tossed it aside. My body was trembling with anticipation. The sound of clinking metal drew my attention to Mel walking back over to me and dangling a set of handcuffs. My eyes grew wide and I held my breath as she approached. 

“Hands up, pretty girl.” Her voice, fuck that voice. It made me weak in the best way.

I lifted my hands up. Mel promptly took them and handcuffed me to the ballet barre. 

“God you’re so fucking easy. But I suppose a princess like you is used to doing what you’re told.” Mel was using a villainous voice. Holy fuck was this what role playing was like? 

Damn I have to keep up. “I-you’ll never get away with this you fiend! You can do whatever you want with me, but I’ll never break to the likes of you.” 

Her hand cupped my face as she stared with burning intensity into my eyes. “Oh, anything I want, hmm? Gladly princess.” Then she let out a low growl that shook me to my core. 

Mel’s lips met mine in a heated embrace. Her hands tracing my chest, teasing my nipples, clawing my sides. I had died and gone to heaven. Nothing had ever felt so intimate before. My eyes closed as I let everything happen. The sensual touch, Mel’s tongue running over my body, the only thing I could do was moan in ecstasy. And wow, was my moan something. I hadn’t realized how much my voice actually changed. It sounded like a girl was getting fucked in the room. And she was, she was me. But I actually sounded hot! I finally stopped holding back and let it all out. 

“What a fucking slutty little princess. Moaning like a whore just from some light teasing.” Mel slapped my chest, “God you really are a subby royal bitch, huh?” Her words were like amplifiers. Only adding to the growing pleasure through me. 

“Mhhmm, y-yes. I’m a slutty p-princess.” My chest was on fire and my pants were getting tighter by the second. I couldn't remember the last time I had been so turned on. 

The sensation of teeth sinking into my neck made me erupt into a chorus of whimpers that echoed almost perfectly in the room. 

“Ffff-fuuuuuck! Please, please I–I want…” I was doing my damndest to catch my breath.

Mel looked me in the eyes again, “Hmm? What does my sweet princess want?” 

My plea of desperation came from a place I hadn’t realized I had. “Fuck me like a good princess.”

Another bite landed on my shoulder before Mel pulled away, “With pleasure your highness. Anything to help secure victory over this kingdom.” 

She laughed as she unlocked one hand from the cuffs and turned me around faster than I expected. Then, they reached back up and secured me to the barre once more. My pants and underwear were expertly torn off of me and discarded. So I knelt there, handcuffed and naked, staring directly at myself though the mirrored wall. 

Mel began to unzip their pants and slide their underwear down. I began bucking my hips back towards them. I wanted them, I wanted it all. It was at that moment I felt a firm smack across my ass. 

“Aaahh!” I yelped. 

“Just giving yourself to me entirely huh? Fucking bottoms, I swear. Don’t worry princess, you’ll be begging for mercy soon.” Mel reached into her discarded jeans and pulled out a small bottle and began lubing herself up, as well as my ass.

People always talk about how some foods are better than sex. They moan and make orgasm sounds from spooning some overpriced food into their mouths. But there’s not a single fucking taste in the cosmos that could compare to the feeling of being penetrated by a girl. Feeling her every inch ease inside you, forcing you to moan like a bitch. To see the look on your own face as you’re fucked like the obedient princess you are. Put that on a fucking milkshake description and tell me how it goes. 

I continuously reached new heights as I was railed like the Island of Sodor. Never before had I loved my voice, than when I called out for more as Mel happily pounded me even harder. My entire body began to shake and tremble, yanking at my restraints and coming so close to the edge. 

Mel grabbed my hair and pulled my head back. “Fucking come for me princess. I can feel you getting close. Cum for me like the good royal whore you are.” 

I gripped the barre, no longer able to form words, just sounds and whines as my legs tensed. There was no holding out any longer. I released the breath I had been keeping in, and painted the mirror in front of me. I shook in Mel’s arms, waves of ecstasy rushing through my entire being in waves before losing all motor control and falling forward. 

Mel finished inside me, releasing a moan of her own. After a moment she picked herself up and unlocked the cuffs from my wrists. We both collapsed on the ground giggling and holding each other so tightly. 

“Fuck, you’re so beautiful Kristal.” She breathed heavily. 

“God you’re amazing Mel. Holy shit that was-that was…” I paused to catch my breath. 

“Now that, was podracing.” She said with an enormous stupid grin. 

The utter fucking audacity. She just came inside me and now she’s making Star Wars jokes?! “I could try spinning, that’s a good trick.” I fucking loved it. 

The both of us burst out laughing. It was the start of something amazing. And I was so excited for my future. Everything was coming up Kristal. Both figuratively and literally apparently. 

***

 

I took a deep breath. All my hard work had led to this moment. Nothing could stop me. Not even me! I adjusted my dress and double checked my wig. Everything was in place. 

“We are proud to bring out our next panel guest. Who will be a playable character in the next DLC, Rose Way! Kristal, our very own Princess Rose!” The announcer called out. 

I released my breath and stepped out on stage. Waving at the hundreds of people in the room. It had been some time since the game was released and everyone loved it. So much so that we had gotten invited to a slew of conventions. Which of course, one of the fan favorites, being me, was invited along. So I got to cosplay as Princess Rose, take pictures, sign autographs, and all kinds of amazing things. It was a dream come true. 

I waved and blew a kiss to Mel who was in a reserved seat up front. She decided to come dressed up as the villain from the game. Which may or may not have been used for several very “official” role playing purposes. Definitely not anything kinky. 

I had an actual career, an amazing girlfriend, and got to be a girl! Just your average voice actress things. 

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