Chapter 12: Chapter 11: Why are you so afraid?

As it turns out, there are a lot of rather serious problems with advancing way too quickly through the standard age benchmarks. Keeping the adults from noticing is a constant struggle, especially when we don’t talk the same language. We’ve made significant progress in our efforts to learn elven, but it’s still not enough to be able to tell whether or not their concerned seeming comments when they look at us have anything to do with them getting suspicious of our behavior.

One issue has been trying to imitate the normal crawling and toddling a baby would do when we are now so far beyond that. I have tried to teach the others to imitate it, me being the foremost expert in the group on how real babies act, but even I can’t imitate the hesitating hap-hazard nature of a baby’s crawling. Even when I imitate the earliest stages of crawling, where I allow my feet to drag behind me, there is still a definite sense of purpose in my movements rather than uncertain experimentation. It’s an imitation in form, but not in spirit.

To make matters worse, we’ve had a lot more adults coming in to visit our room lately. Fortunately, they do not seem very interested in us in particular. They are often looking at the talismans the doctor elf guy hung up, and their faces are an entire range of emotions. Some are excited, but others seem rather concerned for some reason.

Ultimately though, I decide it is a good thing. They are probably not thinking anything weird about us if they are looking around more at the room in general. I do catch them casting glances at the boys from time to time, though. That might be something to watch out for, but I think it probably has something to do with the increased spirit energy density Tia mentioned.

Given the situation, I decided the best approach would be to sit and listen with a curious look on my face to their conversations, hoping to learn some new words from them. My newest words I have managed to pick from the context are “Zattier,” which I believe refers to the barrier, and “Lati,” which I think might refer to the energy, but I’m having some trouble with that one.

So, one day, when the caretaker and the elf doctor guy are the only people in the room, I decide to approach them and try it out. I have learned from listening to conversations that the name of this elf guy is Ether… something. It sounds a little like “Erathinian” or something, but I’m pretty sure I’m getting it wrong. Levin decided to just call him “Ether guy” to make things easier, and Rolwen thought it was hilarious. Since then, that’s what the boys have both absolutely insisted on calling him.

As I approached “Ether guy,” the two adults stopped talking and looked down at me. I saw that this was my chance, and I lifted up a hand and channeled a large amount of spirit energy through my hand, accompanying it with the word “lati!”

Ether guy’s face paled in horror at that instant, and he literally dove on top of me and grabbed me by the shoulders and started yelling.

“Batu dir Asa!”

His gaze was scary, but it softened immediately. “Ah, lati dara. Batu lati! Batu! Batu!” he said.

Of course, I had to behave in a baby-like manner and start crying when he got that insistent with me. I screamed and cried and he immediately started whispering consolations, making for a very easy escape from this uncomfortable situation. Baby privileges, huh? Guess I should enjoy them while they last.

Well, at least the sentences he used were really simple this time. I actually understood every single word he used. So, ultimately, it was a good harvest in terms of information, meaning I'd actually made out like a bandit from this little exchange.

[Stop (that) now Asa! Yes, that is spirit energy. Stop (with the) spirit energy! Stop! Stop!]

It was really starting to concern me with how extreme his reactions were getting each time I used spirit energy like this. So, I decided I would have to ask Tia about it that night.

-

Tia’s answer was to start talking about that meditation he was trying to imprint into my mind that one day.

“You remember how I said the one he was teaching you was bad, right?” She asked one day “I thought you had rejected it at first because you really knew your stuff, but I’ve been finding out your understanding of meditative techniques is a little less informed, and more... intuitive.”

“Does this have something to do with why ‘Ether-guy’ always freaks out about my usual methods?” I ask.

“Yeah, going by what I can guess from his behaviors, I think the meditative techniques of this world are not as advanced as they were on Earth. Well, Earth’s situation is a little special, anyway. Earth is highly resistant to magic due to the extreme density of spirit energy there, so the meditative techniques necessary to even feel like your own energy is rising above the general din are far more advanced by necessity. Although, the trade-off is that this knowledge, as profound as it is, is not as wide spread. I mean, Levin and Rolwen lack any understanding about meditation at all."

“Anyway, the technique he was teaching you is fairly low-grade and involves just accumulating and focusing energy, and not letting it out of your body. It is a technique that was popular on Earth back in my time, before things changed.”

“You are saying Earth used to be different?” Well, that would make some sense. The stories about magic used to be a lot more common in the past. It would stand to reason that something would be causing magic to decay over a long period of time.

“Oh yes. But about the things that guy was trying to teach you… This world is somewhat similar to how Earth was in my time. In fact, the density of spirit energy might be even lower here. So, techniques like what that guy was trying to teach you might even be the extent of their understanding of meditative techniques here in this world.”

“I don’t think someone would try to teach a baby the pinnacle of the known techniques in the world,” I countered. That was probably an extremely simplified version, or beginner level at most. “This doesn’t explain why he was freaking out though.”

“No, what I meant is that’s probably exactly why he was freaking out,” Tia said. “It’s because he was freaking out that I don’t think their understanding of meditation goes that far beyond just accumulating energy. Maybe they have different techniques for handling it afterward that he wasn’t teaching you, but they likely don’t have your methods of channeling energy and allowing it to flow.”

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“Tia, you really are not good at getting to the point,” I tell her. “You keep beating around the bush with your justifications for what you are building up to. Can we just skip to the end now?” A goddess, huh? Guess she really doesn’t have much experience talking with actual people.

“Huh? Uhh… Ok, yeah. Well, if the only thing he understands is accumulating energy, then it probably scares him to see you pouring out energy the way you do. To someone with his understanding, it would look the same as someone with a bleeding open wound.”

I give Tia an appraising look. A baby’s face is pretty expressive, but it’s surprisingly hard to read the more subtle clues in regards to whether someone is lying or trying to hide something. Or, possibly just doesn’t know the answer and is bullshitting. I really think she’s being up front with me here and knows what she’s talking about, but, as someone who’s used to being able to read people, it’s a little unnerving to be so thrown off about things. Well, I guess if facial cues won’t cut it, I can still listen to her voice. Her voice seems stable and confident, so I guess she at least believes what she’s saying. If she’s lying now, then she’s an incredible actor with all that social awkwardness stuff she usually does.

Just in case though…

“And you’re sure he’s not the one who has the right idea, and you’re the one who’s missing something here?” I asked.

“Absolutely!” She said with full confidence. “You and the boys had spirits that were almost equal in strength when you first got here. You all started advancing further in your spiritual strength after you started walking and talking, but you have been improving faster than them. That’s because your meditation is really giving you the right stuff.”

Well, that settles it. 100% confidence in her answer. She’s not bullshitting. I also really doubt she would lie, so she’s probably telling the truth. Meaning, as Tia sayz,  Ether guy  just doesn’t know what he’s seeing and that’s why he’s freaking out..

“Ok then, I believe you. Good to know. But… something’s still bothering me. I don’t really think I know anything about you and your past life. You keep talking about ‘your time’ and all that. When was that exactly?”

“That? Umm… Well, I am not really good with time and dates,” she said.

Great job, Tia. You had a good image going for yourself with all that confidence a moment ago.

“Alright, then. How about some names? I think you said your name when we before, at the end of my life when you…”

“Uhh… yeah,” Tia said and got very awkward. “I, uhh… sorry about that.”

I sighed. “No, it’s fine,” I said. “We made a deal, and I took it. I’ve already settled my feelings on that matter.”

“Really?” she asked.

“Yes, really,” I told her. 

She’s my sister in this life, and she’s also the most reliable source of knowledge I have. Pragmatically speaking, it would be better to have good relations with her. Holding a grudge over her biting out my throat in front of my granddaughter would just cause a lot of unnecessary drama that I saw no need for.

“Anyway,” I continued. “It was a little crazy, so I can’t really remember the name you gave me. I think it started with an ‘A?’”

“Amashilama,” she said. “I was the adopted daughter of Ninisina, the goddess of healing.”

“Goddess of healing, huh? What were you a goddess of, then?” I asked. She was able to heal as well, as evidenced by Katelyn suddenly sitting bolt upright and crying about me as soon as my extracted blood touched her lips. If she was the daughter of a goddess of healing, it had to be involved with her mother’s divinity somehow. It’s probably not blood sacrifice. Maybe it’s just blood, then? Celebrating the life aspects of blood?

“I… wasn’t actually a goddess...” she said. “I was a divine beast. A leech that my mother kept for some of her treatments. I was fed the blood of several gods over the course of my life, so it gave me divine power, and I became as intelligent as one of the human gods. So, she adopted me as her daughter.”

I just stared at her silently for a while. A leech, huh? I guess that explains how she was able to adapt our elven way of feeding into the ability to bite other people’s energy. Must have been pretty instinctual for her. I’ve never had a need for that, I seem to get all my “food” from my meditation.

Now then, Amashilama and Ninisina. And Amashilama is a divine leech. I guess the association with the goddess of healing makes sense, given her explanation. The one problem is that, before meeting her at the moment of my death, I had never heard of Amashilama in my life. She was probably a fairly minor figure, so it makes sense, but this gets me no closer to knowing what pantheon she was a part of.

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