Chapter 13: 13. Out of Sight, Out of Mind

"Meeting went ok. On my way back home now. Tell you about it when I get there."

I had mixed feelings as I read Stacey's text. It was only about half past ten Tuesday morning, and despite his claim that his meeting was ok I couldn't help worry things didn't go as well as we'd hoped.

"Thanks babe. C u soon!" I texted back, then I put my phone down and sighed.

He was supposed to be meeting with his manager and someone from HR, and I was positive if it was just a routine trans coming-out-at-work thing then it should have been a non-event. The fact that they were sending him home instead of letting him get on with his work day could only mean trouble, as far as I was concerned.

Unfortunately there wasn't anything I could do about it, apart from waiting patiently for Stace to get home and fill me in on the details. So I tried to get back to what I was doing before I got his text, but it wasn't easy to stay focused after that.

I was still looking for work, and I wasn't going to give up this time like I did last year. I wasn't going to settle for another dead-end job I hated. I was determined not to get lazy or complacent either, I didn't want to treat this as a vacation or let myself get used to not having a job.

My plan was to make looking for work part of my daily routine. I wanted to stay in a working mind-set too, so I promised myself I wasn't going to spend my days sleeping in till noon or lounging around in a nightshirt all the time. This morning I got up with Stace, took turns in the shower with him, got dressed with him, and I had breakfast with him. Then after he left for work I checked my email got online to resume my search for any new openings.

And when that came up empty I tried not to let myself get discouraged. Instead I opened up some of my old college documents and lessons and started reviewing that, to make sure I hadn't forgot all the stuff I learned. I figured I could even re-do some of the old assignments or projects, to brush up on my graphics design skills. That way I wouldn't be completely stale and out of practice when I did finally get some interviews.

Except now that I was waiting for Stace to get home I had a hard time focusing on last year's college course material. I tried to get back into it, but ended up killing time on discord instead.

At long last I heard the apartment door open, and I practically jumped out of my chair and dashed out of the office to go meet my boyfriend. And even though it wasn't even noon yet he already looked stressed and a bit weary, which only added to my worry.

I wrapped my arms around him in a tight hug as I asked, "So how did it go? What happened?"

"Let me put the coffee on then we can get comfortable and I'll tell you all about it," he replied with a sigh.

"You sit," I stated as I let go of him. "I'll take care of the coffee."

"Thanks cutie," he smiled as he moved to the sofa.

It took me a minute or two to get the machine set up and started, then I hurried back to the living-room and cuddled up against Stace's side. I tried not to sound too anxious or uneasy as I asked him, "So what happened? Why'd they send you home?"

Stacey sighed again, "So like I said earlier, the meeting was supposed to be with my manager and someone from HR? They were probably expecting it to be fifteen or twenty minutes, tops. They've done this sort of thing before with other trans employees, so they know how it goes. They thought the old me would show up and talk about being trans, we'd discuss the company policies on the subject, review the health plan coverage for HRT and surgery, all that kind of thing? Needless to say, that's not how it went."

"We ended up spending the first fifteen or twenty minutes with me just trying to get them to believe who I was," he grimaced. "I finally convinced them, but it was awkward as hell. Then my manager called his boss into the meeting as well, and I had to go through that whole thing again. So basically the first thirty or forty minutes were just establishing who I was. Then we could finally get on with the actual conversation."

I knew it had to be really stressful, I could hear it in his voice and feel it in his body as I cuddled against his side. I probably sounded anxious as I asked, "You said it went ok though?"

Stace nodded, "I still have a job, that's the most important thing."

"The meeting was kind of all over the place though," he continued after one more sigh. "All three of them were freaked out by the fact that I'd completely transitioned over the weekend? And they were even more freaked out by my ears and tail. The HR guy especially, he started worrying about whether I had any special needs or if the company would face any accessibility issues? Like obviously they don't have anything in the HR handbook about handling employees who aren't completely human?"

Both of us couldn't help smiling at that point, like it was such an out-there thing and I'm sure neither of us even thought of it from that angle, but of course an HR guy would be thinking about that side of things.

My boyfriend got serious again as he got back to the story, "One thing he was worried about was if I'd need special tail-friendly chairs? Not just in my cubicle, but in the lunch room, the meeting room, or anywhere else? Like if I was called to a meeting in my manager's office and the guest chairs weren't tail-friendly, would that lead to problems down the road?"

"Meanwhile my manager was worried about how the rest of his team would handle things," Stace frowned. "Not about me being a guy, the company policies are pretty good and I think most of my coworkers are probably decent enough folks not to flip out over a trans colleague? But again, it's the sudden transition and the fox stuff that had him worried. Which is why I'm home now instead of at work."

His frown got a bit deeper when he got to that part. "So I'm on leave the rest of this week, I don't know yet if this is going to count as vacation time or if it'll count against my sick days? But my manager's idea, and both his boss and HR went along with it, is I'm now on their work-from-home program. Either tomorrow or Thursday a courier will drop off a company-issued laptop and whatever else they want to send me. Then Friday someone from IT will get on a call with me to get that set up here and hook me into the company's VPN and stuff. So next Monday morning at nine I'll be reporting to work from here."

By the time he was done the coffee was ready, so I got up to go deal with that. At the same time I asked, "You sound unhappy about this Stace? Isn't it a good thing though? I mean, you're still employed, and you get to avoid the commute? Isn't that win-win?"

"Maybe?" he responded. "That's the optimistic way of looking at it anyways. I guess I'm being a little more wary, or maybe I'm just a bit pessimistic about it? I can't help worrying though, that sending me to work from home is the first step in getting rid of me. You know, out of sight out of mind kind of thing?"

I frowned as I returned to the sofa with two mugs of coffee, "Do you really think that? Like they just came up with a plan on the spot to get rid of you?"

"Thanks Meg," he smiled as I handed him his mug.

He took a sip of his drink then shook his head, "And no, I don't think they somehow came up with an elaborate conspiracy to get rid of me on the spot. Getting me to work from home makes HR happy because it means they don't have to panic over the potential accessibility question. It makes my manager happy because he doesn't have to worry about the rest of his people freaking out that there's a real live foxboy on the team. And I assume it makes the boss happy because he doesn't need to worry about any of those things either."

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"Except like I just said, I'm worried that getting me out of the office is the first step to getting rid of me completely" he added. "If I'm the only one on the team who's working from home it means I'm out of the loop. Easy to overlook and forget. It means I'm going to be overly sensitive about missing meetings, but it also means I miss out on the camaraderie and random talk with my coworkers. It's easy to talk to the guy in the next cubicle, or have the stereotypical chat around the water cooler or in the break room? Now if someone wants to talk to me they'll have to pick up the phone or send an email, so I probably won't be included unless it's something official or a situation where they specifically need me."

I sighed, "I'm sorry Stace. Hopefully this is just temporary though, right? Until they sort things out?"

He had some more of his coffee then nodded, "That's what they said, that's the plan. They didn't set any deadline or target date for when I'd be moved back into the office though. I guess I'll just have to keep pushing and reminding them that this is only temporary. But you know there's a saying about temporary solutions becoming permanent."

I nodded slowly, then had some of my coffee as I thought about everything he just told me. I finally asked, "So most of the issues came down to being part fox? They didn't have any problem with you being trans?"

Stace shrugged, "Not as such? There were a few things but very minor compared to the rest of it."

"They said they'd update my info in the employee database," he added. "The HR guy suggested I should get my legal ID updated as soon as I could though, incase there were any questions down the road. So that's something I need to start working on now I guess?"

"How?" I asked. "I mean until we hear back from your dad we don't even know if we'll be able to get new ID, so how are you going to work on that?"

He drained the last of his coffee then reminded me, "It's more than just getting a new picture on my drivers license. For one thing I need to update the gender marker right? I know you had to get a letter from one of your doctors for that, but I have no idea what I'm going to do. Like it doesn't make much sense to tie up a spot at that clinic when I've already got my magical transition. So I need to do some research and figure out what other options I have for that."

"And I want to put some more thought into my name again," he continued. "I know I said I was ok with Stace for now, but if I have to go through all that paperwork and stuff anyways then I may as well put some thought into whether I want to change my name? Maybe I should find something that's less ambiguous. Like even if there are some guys called Stacey, I think it's a lot more common as a girl's name these days."

"Ok babe," I said as I hugged him. "I get that. I've wanted to be Megan for years, but I know some folks go through a few different names before finding the one that works for them. And if you're comfortable being Stacey then please don't feel you have to change it for the sake of other people. Especially not because someone in HR said so."

Stace smiled, "I know cutie. Thanks though."

The conversation tapered off there for a bit, and we just cuddled quietly for another minute or two. Then I got up and took the coffee mugs back to the kitchen to rinse them out. I called back to my boyfriend, "Do you want more coffee?"

"Sure," he replied. "Thanks Meg!"

When I returned to the living-room with both mugs refilled Stace asked, "So now I've updated you on my morning, what have you been up to today?"

I sat cuddling with him again and the two of us enjoyed our coffee while I told him about my morning. Not just my ongoing efforts to find a job, but also about my plan to keep myself busy and brush up on my design skills until I actually got a good job.

"Good girl," he said with a smile after I was done. "That sounds like a really good plan."

I teased, "Of course that was before I found out I'd have you loitering around the apartment all day long. It's going to be tough focusing on anything job-related when I've got my gorgeous hunk of a boyfriend nearby."

Stace chuckled, "I was just thinking the same thing cutie. How am I ever going to get any work done if I'm sharing an office with my cute sexy girlfriend?"

"Sounds like we're both going to struggle with temptation," I grinned. "And you know, we're heading into the hottest part of the summer. Will you be able to control yourself if I'm lounging around the apartment in nothing but a bra and panties?"

My boyfriend rolled his eyes as he fired back, "I don't know Meg? Will you be able to handle it if I stop wearing pants? Work will never know, any video conferences will just be from the waist up."

I gave him a wide eager smile as I pointed out, "I'm small enough to fit under your desk Stace. Will my pantsless boyfriend be able to keep a straight face in the video conference when I'm down there using my mouth to -"

"Ok you win!" he laughed.

"Play your cards right and we'll both win!" I quipped, but the joke had pretty much run its course by that point.

Stace smiled and shook his head, "We're both going to be awfully tempted, but we can't just goof off all day long. Even if I'm home I'll still be 'at work'. And you'll be sticking to your plan until you land a job."

I nodded, "Yeah. Maybe we can goof off at lunch though? And at least you won't be wasting an hour or more every day on the commute."

"I'm sure there'll be pros and cons," he agreed as he finally got to his feet. "Thanks for the coffee Meg. I'm going to email my folks and let them know about the situation with work. And see if dad has any suggestions or ideas yet about what we can do for ID."

"Ok Stace," I responded as I got up as well.

He went to his computer in the office while I took our mugs back to the kitchen, then tidied up a bit.