Chapter 120: Chapter 119: Don’t Tell Deckard

Drunken Filly, the inn, was in much better shape than Broken Mug, larger too, and yet the place seemed full. If I had to guess, it was due to the clever placement across the street from the barracks. Hats off to the owner.

It didn’t change the fact that I didn’t even know how I got here. All the way here, my mind was wrestling with my jitters. Hell, my palms were sweating so much that my new shorts were already showing stains where I’d wiped them on. I was actually trembling, so I didn’t find it strange that my instincts were telling me to run as if I was facing a powerful monster.

In fact, I would rather face such a beast than this inn full of strangers who want to toast with me. And hopefully, just a toast. The thought of anything else made me even more anxious. What if someone wants to dance? All I knew were the moves from parties and clubs, not a real waltz and stuff. Would that meet with understanding? I bet these party dance moves would make me even more of a weirdo. Not to mention, even in those moves, I was rusty.

“Are you going in? Or are you gonna stand here all night?”

Swordmaster Blaine, his voice coming from behind me, made me jump a little. “Evening...” I greeted him, puzzled when I realized I didn’t know how to address him. Rayden introduced her lieutenant to me by name. However, he was sort of my superior...in a roundabout way.

“Relax Grey. We’re not in the barracks, and I’m not even your commanding officer. Blaine will do. Swordmaster, if you must.”

“Oh...okay, thanks,” I said, feeling the awkwardness of the situation, not knowing what to say next. “Korra, I don’t mind if you call me Korra.” Awkward, I know. I should have said it right away.

“Don’t mind if I do, then.”

After I gave him a smile, an uncomfortable silence fell between us. “So...You don’t have a last name?”

“Orphans hardly ever have.”

“Sorry...I didn’t mean to...”

He held up his hand to stop me. “You don’t have to. I have no memories of my folks. And what you don’t remember, you can’t miss.”

“I don’t think that’s true.”

“Whatever...” he said with a shrug. “I’m surprised Deckard didn’t tell you.”

“About what?”

“About me and the others being orphans of the war.” Orphans of war? Mind Wars?

That gave me pause. “What about Captain Rayden? She has a last name. Did she get married?”

“Traiana’s tits, no!” he said, seeing the idea was utterly ridiculous. “She’s older than the rest of us, just a few years. Enough to remember her folks, though. For reasons, the old man couldn’t give us his family name, so at least he made sure she got to keep hers.”

“Ah...wait, Deckard is an orphan too?”

Blaine laughed. “It took you a while to figure it out. Frankly, I’m amazed you didn’t ask him.”

What can I say?

“Yes, he is, just like the rest of us. Why do you think everyone calls him Deckard?”

It made more sense to me now, but... “Well, I thought he was just famous. Some sort of celebrity, you know.”

“I don’t know how he would take you comparing him to theater performers...he is surely well known, though. How to say it? Well, he has a certain charisma...”

“Isn’t he famous for being strong?” I would not call that charisma.

Blaine nodded. “That’s only part of the picture. Over the years as an intelligence officer, I’ve learned that strength isn’t everything, Korra. It’s also about how people perceive you.” He paused, thinking of examples. “Strong but humble. Powerful and kind. There are many ways you can impact people. Many powerful individuals suffer from arrogance, pride, and superiority. Not the ones ordinary folk like to deal with. When they see you as cheerful, many doors will open for you. People themselves will want to talk to you, despite your tremendous strength.”

“Deckard is not cheerful,” I objected, thinking about him. “Rather carefree.”

“Isn’t he...quite easily approachable with his laid-back attitude, right? But trust me, when the shit hits the fan, he can be dead serious and the man you can count on.”

I would add strictness to that. The words ‘can’t do’ were not in his vocabulary when he trained me and was in his drill sergeant mode. Don’t get me wrong, I may have had the determination, but I needed that sort of coaching nonetheless.

Anyway, what Blaine told me cleared up a lot of questions that were on my mind and raised new ones. Like why the hell was he telling me all this? We weren’t exactly friends, more like acquaintances.

“I see. I won’t pry into your shit, so don’t pry into mine. You’re the kind of person, eh?”

Shrugging at first, taken aback by his question, I gave him a nod when I figured there was no point in denying it. “What made you say that all of a sudden?”

“Oh, in all the time you’ve known Deckard, you’ve never once asked for his last name. Besides, after what I told you, I expected more questions, much more. I can see your curiosity, yet you’re holding it back.”

There was no doubt that even in the gloom of the evening, he could read my body language and thus my interest in learning more about Deckard, Rayden, and the others. After all, they were the people who decided to help me. I wanted to understand why. There had to be more to it than me being Deckard’s apprentice. So...

“Sorry to disappoint.” No, he guessed me right. Personal questions made me uncomfortable, so I didn’t ask them either. When you pry into the privacy of others, you are expected to reveal something of your own. That could have dire consequences for me.

He smirked. “Not disappointed at all. You are who I thought you were, so far.”

“Hell! Did you come up to me to test me? To see who I am?” I asked, pissed but careful not to think of Earth, the place of my origin.

“See, that’s how I impact people. A habit of the profession,” he said tiredly, with a hint of dismay in his voice. “No...and yes, I saw you standing here when I came out of the barracks, fidgeting nervously with your tail between your legs, staring at the Filly. I just figured it was a good time to talk to you.”

Did I really have Sage between my legs? Fuck, I did. Feeling awkward, I considered just entering the inn without another word and hoping he wouldn’t take it too badly. Yet I found the courage to stay.

“Why?” I asked instead of running away. “Then why did you want to talk to me?” Why, if not to find out information about me, to get more out of me? The question I didn’t voice out loud. Without a word, he took out a Silencer similar to the one Deckard had lent me earlier and activated it. With the magic tool silencing our words for the ears of others on the street, I knew that what I would hear was not for anyone else to hear.

“I didn’t handle it well at all, did I?” Blaine said, more to himself than expecting an answer from me. “I meant to pique your curiosity about Deckard’s history. You should have asked, and I wouldn’t look like an idiot telling you about his past. Nevertheless, Deckard, Rhys, Janine, Marcus, Sanysia, and I were orphans taken under the wing of the late Lord Egerton. He took care of us, trained us, made us a family.”

When he paused, I waited in silence, not daring to say anything lest I make the whole situation even weirder.

“We became very close, brothers and sisters that none of us had. Some, like Janina and Marcus, got closer than others, but no kids. And now you’re here.”

“I’m not a child!” I objected, not wanting another one calling me a girl.

“No, you’re not. What you’re is Deckard’s apprentice. He took you in, made you his responsibility, just like the old man took care of us. In my books, it makes you part of the family. Wait... before you start arguing otherwise, let me tell you, that’s how I see it, that’s how I’m gonna treat you. I don’t expect you to feel the same. After all, you got to remember your family. Are they...?”

“Still alive the last time I saw them...except for my mom,” I said, sorrow seeping into my voice. This conversation and his question brought back sad memories. Why the hell did I even tell him?

“She lost her life during your kidnapping...” he asked carefully.

“No,” I said with a shake of my head. “Illness.”

“Ah, a foe on whom it is hard to fix one’s rage.”

The understanding in his voice made me ask. “You’ve lost someone close to you.”

“The old man, late Lord Egerton. His subordinate mortally wounded him.”

“So you had a face to throw your anger on.”

“At first,” he said, admitting. “After all, the woman was a victim, too. The actual killer was a mind mage, a powerful one that broke through her mental defenses. It took us years to get him, and we’re not really sure he was behind it.”

“...okay...” I said hesitantly, nodding slightly. “...so it could have been one of the mind mages trying to get me?”

“It might well be one of them. The problem is, it’s hard to tell. Mind mages hardly ever fight directly. If anything, you’ll clash with their underlings, mind-controlled humans, and monsters.”

Really? “Then why was Morton in the barracks?” Yay, I finally stopped thinking of him as Agent Hal. Plus points for me.

“It was because of Denholm. We made some of his underlings talk. He wasn’t as confident in the attack on the barracks as people might believe the Beast of the South was. He used Morton to get in and wanted to use him to distract us if things went wrong...and keep his cash cow by his side when he was risking so much.”

“But don’t worry,” he said before I could answer. “You’re part of the family now. We’ll do all we can to make sure no one gets to you, whether it’s a mind mage or the bastard who made you.”

“T-thanks, but...why go to such lengths for me?” It was baffling. He could say whatever he wanted, but I was essentially a stranger.

“What I’m about to tell you, don’t tell Deckard. He’d kill me.” At my nod, Blaine went on. “He’s a very caring guy. Deckard tries not to show it, hide it behind his laid-back attitude, though he cares about you, about us, and his promise to the old man. You know, it wasn’t just Sanysia who swore to the old man we’d take care of his city and his children. We were all there when he died.”

More and more perplexed, I had more and more questions. Deckard was caring? It was hard to imagine. Besides... “Why did he leave the City Guards, then?”

Blaine laughed. “Honestly, we all should. He just had the balls to do it. Look, we’re stagnating here. We grew up in war, we were trained for it, not for...this. There’s a limit to how much you can bend your class, and so while our enemies grow stronger, we sit here with our thumb up our asses trying to keep young Egerton in his position.”

“You do? I thought Rayden would be happy to get rid of him.”

“Him,” said Blaine, giving me a smile. “...him, for sure. He should never have been given that position. His sister Margaret could have done the city better. Unfortunately, she was never interested. Now her children have grown up, and San is pinning her hopes on them. Just so you know, one of them might join your squad. After all, you’re still one member short.”

“Are you serious? Lordling?”

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As soon as I said it, I realized my blunder.

“You shouldn’t judge a book by its cover.”

“Yeah, I know. I’m the best example.” Slave and terran at first glance, the killer beast within. Sorry, the whole killing thing was fresh on my mind. Putting that aside, while they were the City Lord’s nephews and nieces, they may have been quite different from him.

Blaine smiled. “That you are. You’d pass for a terran, but I felt your presence, and from what I heard, it became even stronger.”

“The room shook.”

“Wow, a physical manifestation. That’s quite a feat.”

“Hmm,” I hummed, not really taking it that way. “Not if you achieve it without effort.”

“Yeah, I know the feeling. Doesn’t make it any less of a feat.”

Giving him a shrug, I went back to what we were talking about before, the nephews and nieces of the City Lord.

“How can Rayden be sure the Empire won’t appoint someone else from the nobility?”

“The Emperor and Empress prefer to preserve the old lineages. Partly because there are ancient ties between them, magic ties etched into the blood passed down through the generations, and partly because change brings uncertainty.”

“Change can be a good thing,” I said, only to pause. What about my change? Was it good? Taken out of my world, away from my family. Did it help me? I was definitely someone else now, and I didn’t just mean my changes, my mutations. Never in my wildest dreams did I think I’d be able to kill an animal, let alone a man, and with my bare hands. With my bare hands!

“You don’t have to tell me that. Whether in combat, recon, or playing cards, if you stay true to the few tricks you’ve learned, you’ll never get far. That’s why I envy Deckard, and I understand his excitement at finding you after being stuck for so long.”

“Then why don’t you go to Fallens Cry with him?”

Blaine smirked. “He asked me the same thing. He asked every one of us, even begged.”

“And...?”

“I may sound like I miss the fight, old times. The truth is, I like the peace. I’m tired of fighting, of having to look over my shoulder and wonder when the friend you share a tent with is going to turn on you, controlled by a mind mage. The others...they may tell you they have obligations, that they have no one to hand their work over to, or whatever, but they’re all just excuses. At the core, they are all tired of fighting.”

It was unsettling to hear about the people whose help I counted on. On the other hand, it was quite understandable.

“It’s not like we won’t fight when it comes down to it,” he said, seeing my reaction. “We will, and we will fight to our last breath. We just don’t have that spark to keep us pressing forward anymore.”

“Like Deckard has?”

“No, like you have. Don’t be mistaken. Deckard is as tired of the war as we are. As I said, he’s a caring guy and took it upon himself to keep the peace we found ourselves in here. He’s getting stronger to face threats we won’t be able to.”

“Ah...” So it wasn’t someone driven by a desire to become stronger, but a desire to have the power to protect others. His motivation was certainly more classy than mine. All I cared about was myself.

“Glad I got you to talk.”

I raised an eyebrow. “I haven’t said much, though.”

“I admit I’d prefer to know more about you, but there’s no need. Deckard told me you confided in him. Don’t worry, he didn’t tell me more than to trust his judgment that you’re not a threat. Though I would hate to see him...let’s say disappointed.”

Was that a threat? What happened to being part of the family? “I don’t know how to help him with his bottlenecks.”

“I’m not talking about that. That’s his problem to solve. What I meant was not to be disappointed in you for who you are.”

I got it. “Fuck! You’re afraid I might stab him in the back, aren’t you? Of using him to my own gain and getting rid of him when I reach my goal, right?”

“Something along those lines,” he said with a nod, calmly expecting me to refute him.

I took a deep breath. “Let me tell you, such thoughts have never crossed my mind. When I first saw him in that clearing in Esulmor Woods, I had no idea who he was, why all of a sudden he decided to save me. Fuck! I thought he was just another goon trying to get me, that his help was some kind of sick ploy of his to get me into his clutches.” I paused, realizing that for what I said, Deckard would have rubbed my nose in it. “Don’t tell him that!”

“You don’t tell on me. I won’t tell on you,” Blaine said, calm despite my raised voice.

“Look, I didn’t ask him. He was the one who suggested to me the apprenticeship, and it made me damn grateful for it.”

“Just grateful? If it were anyone else, they would be beside themselves.”

“Well, I’m not anyone else. If the memo didn’t get to you, I’m not from around here. Deckard is not a legend to me, but a man who offered a helping hand when I needed it most. He offered me a way out, and I accepted.

Yeah, Blaine, I see him as my opportunity to become stronger, but so does he. It’s a mutual contract. You were there and signed it too, so you know that either of us can end it.”

“True,” he said with a cool calm and a hint of amusement on his face that made me even angrier. “Thanks for your honesty, Korra.”

That gave me pause. “Did you say all that on purpose to provoke me?”

“Everything I said I meant and is true. The timing and tone...can do wonders. For example, it got more than a cautious response out of you.”

Yes, it did. Fortunately, nothing I regret came out of my mouth.

“Are you really just a Swordmaster?”

“Same back to you. Are you just a Slave?”

“Not anymore, but I’m sure you know that...ah...”

He smiled when he saw the understanding in my eyes. It was about how he used his class. Thinking about it, it didn’t tell me much, though. He couldn’t have been Swordmaster since he was 16, could he?

“That’s something I’ll keep to myself, for now,” he said when he saw my questioning look.

“Come on, you know damn near everything about me.”

“Just because I told you about my past doesn’t mean I’ll tell you everything.”

“Not fair.”

“That’s life.”

C'est la vie, huh? Harsh truth.

Not knowing what to think of Blaine, I trailed off. On the one hand, he messed with me, on the other hand, he seemed concerned about his friends, his family. It wasn’t hard to see why he wanted to find out more about me, the stranger in their midst. Although his way of getting to know me was awkward at the very least.

With the moons hanging high above my head, I found myself feeling sympathy for him instead of hatred. I still didn’t like how he deliberately baited me, but I got why he did it.

“Blaine, I hope we can get along,” I said, offering him my hand.

He looked at me, a hint of surprise in his eyes. “I thought you’d be pissed.”

“I am, come on...don’t leave a girl hanging.”

“Let’s get along, then,” he laughed and shook my hand. “That earned you a drink from me. Basilisk’s Kiss should do for your Constitution.”

What the hell does the Constitution have to do with drinking? I realized how stupid that question was as soon as I thought of it. My health was more robust, my resistance higher.

“Shit!”

“You realized that getting hammered wasn’t going to be so easy for you now, huh?”

I gave him a scowl, thinking. “My Constitution is now in the 100s.” Sooner or later, he’d read a report, anyway.

“Wow,” His whistling made my ears twitch. “Dragon Fart it is, then. I hope you have good resistance to pain, though.”

“Yeah, about that...” it wasn’t a bad idea to ask someone else about possible skills. Not when it looked like I was going to get a chance to train some of them tonight.

 

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