Chapter 108: [Anxious Heart] [Permanently]

A/N

Chapter dedicated to  hasvu ^^

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Much love, my friends!

----

[Zoe]

[Anxious Heart]

"Where are you going?"

Estela grabbed my hand when I zoomed towards that boy with a black mask.

"I . . . I . . ."

I didn't look at Estela. My eyes lock on that boy, afraid I might lose him in the crowd.

When I saw him exiting the Casino, I panicked.

I shook my hand from Estela's grasp and ran towards the exit.

"I'm sorry, Estela! I have to go! Go back on your own! I'll call you!"

"Zoe!"

I didn't mind Estela's frantic calls, nor the people's curious stares, nor the mask which fell out of my face, nor I almost slid down from the stairs.

When the boy entered a car and drove off, I rushed to the nearest taxi stand.

"FOLLOW THAT FUCKING CAR!"

The driver must have sensed I was ready to kill him if he didn't listen to me as he quickly drove and follow the boy's car.

----

What am I doing?

I bit my lower lip. I was sitting at the lobby in a hotel, waiting for the boy to come out, ignoring all the glances thrown at me. They must be curious as to why I was in a peacock dress. I bet I look good in a masquerade party but look ridiculous in here.

You're not even sure if he's indeed THAT boy.

Even so. I continued to wait.

The boy's hair and built were the same as I remembered it.

It's my only lead. I'll have to see his face!

I was shifting from standing and sitting for some time. Unsure of what to do.

It was already an hour, and I sensed that anytime soon, the guards would shoo me away. They must think that I was crazy, hopping between standing and sitting while in a peacock dress. I might take wings and fly soon.

I don't care.

I don't care at all.

Eventually, I could no longer hold the suspense and agony anymore –– I walked towards the reception.

Just as I was about to shamelessly ask the room number of that boy, the elevator dinged, and my eyes flew to the young man who came out.

I was electrified, couldn't think as my heart beat faster and faster. My blood was out of control like my dizziness. My legs were paralyzed on the spot as my muscles tightened while my stomach and intestines were twisting like I had diarrhea, LBM, and constipation all at once.

When our gaze met, his deep brown eyes were surprised, yet it quickly returned to its calm, mysterious glint.

I thought my heart would leap out from my mouth, so I kept my lips tight.

He sauntered toward me. I was suffocating and realized I forgot to breathe. I didn't know what to do as I was having seizures at the moment.

"H-h-h-how . . ."

I didn't finish my sentence as he was just inches apart from me. He then turned to face the reception lady and gave out a card.

"Everything is done. Thank you for staying with us," the reception lady said, all smiles.

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The boy nodded and walked to a well-built man, and without even glancing at me, they left the lobby.

W-what happened? Didn't he recognize me?

Unable to accept the outcome. I sprinted out of the hotel and found the young boy together with his male companion inside a car and drove off.

Fudge!

I rushed again to the nearest taxi stand, roaring.

"FOLLOW THAT FUCKING CAR!"

----

[Zoe]

[Permanently]

After I called Leanna and Estela that I would be going ahead, back to New Haven, I looked at the ticket on my hands.

Izu Island

What am I doing?

I continued to lock my gaze at the young boy who was sitting, sleeping peacefully on the couch, ten meters away from me.

I sighed, remembering what happened.

Following the person who dominated my entire heart all the way into the airport was a shameless, desperate idea.

I can't help it! I'm going crazy here! I need to talk to him again.

When I saw he checked in on a flight going to Izu Island, I didn't have second thoughts. I bought a ticket, not minding the price for the abrupt booking. I sighed in secret that there was still a seat left.

Well, why wouldn't it have any seats left?

Izu Island is a luxury island. A favorite hangout place of the rich and powerful. Not many could afford the extravagant price for a night in there.

I wonder what he's going to do there? Vacation? Doesn't he have class?

Before I sat down on a couch in front of the boarding gate, I bought myself a shirt and jeans to get out of the ridiculous peacock dress. I was about to approach him when he closed his eyes and took a nap.

I didn't want to disturb him, so I contented to sat and gape at him from afar.

I sighed again, more heavy from the last.

I didn't know I could chase a man like this. No, a kid at that like some hormonal teenager stalking her crush. I didn't know that he could make me do crazy things.

He clearly saw me in the hotel lobby, but he acted like he didn't know me. His deep brown eyes didn't even hold recognition.

Am I just a passing woman to him?

I shook the idea off. I couldn't believe that he would forget me just like that.

But the thought that he did forget me ate away my heart, mind, body, and soul.

I held on to the note in my hand.

I didn't know what I wanted after meeting him again.

Was it to say hi?

No. I wanted more.

Was it to get to know him?

No. I wanted more.

Was it to be friends with him?

No. I wanted more.

I closed my eyes.

Fudge! I do know what I want.

The moment I gave my virginity to him, drug or no drug, that moment sealed everything.

I wanted him to be a part of my life.

Permanently.

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