Chapter 33: Understanding

 Dean: Incubus, mage. Has a soft spot for kind grandmothers? 

"More tea, dear?" I smile, and hold out my cup for a refill. Dru is like this really fluffy person, that you can't help but want to hug, and squeeze the life out of. 

"Thank you, Dru," I tell her, as she fills up my cup. When she is done, she turns to Augustine, who has just set an empty cup on his saucer. 

"More tea, dear?" Dru turns towards him next. 

"Oh, no. I can't drink another..." Augustine tries, but then Dru levels him with a glare. The mana around the walls flares to life. Ah, she might be a kind old granny, but she is also a dungeon core. Augustine smiles, and holds out his cup. 

"Take a cookie, dear," Dru tells him, when she is done filling his cup. "You look thin. Do you not eat enough? If it were anyone else, I'd say that you didn't like the food that you were served, but we are talking about you. You can cook so well, that my mouth waters just thinking about it."

"How about I make you some pork ribs? Do you have a grill?" I should have known that Augustine is going to catch on that little fact like a drowning man. 

"Are you saying that I need to be cooked for?" Dru snaps. Augustine shakes his head. Dru returns to being a kind old granny again. She turns to Vincent. "More tea, dear?" 

"Allan would like more tea. His cup is empty," Vincent throws Allan under the car, and I glare at him. Allan, bless his soul, holds up his cup without a protest. I can see that, whatever it was that he spoke with the guild master about weights heavily on him. He is sort of out of it. That, or he is still trying to come to grasps about the fact that there is a crater where the guild house once stood. Mostly because of him. 

Dru fills up his cup, and scans the cups of the rest of us. I humor her, and take a sip. She smiles at me, and fills up her own cup. I have noticed that she has been nibbling on the same cookie the whole evening. Which is fine, I guess. It is not like dungeon cores actually need to eat. Well, apart from when they overuse their mana. 

"It is so mean of that boy, Warren," Dru begins, and I have to chuckle at the way she refers to the guild master. I really have to see how he handles her in a conversation. 

He might try to rake in more insurance money. I wonder if she is accident-prone? 

"So, so, mean, to rank you D for Disaster. He could have ranked you D for Dicks. It is more logical," she says. I chuckle, but the rest gape at her. 

"Dru!" Atha, the prude that he is, exclaims. "What will Dean think of us, dungeon cores, if you speak like that?" 

"That you are a fun bunch? Honest, too?" I ask in a drawl. 

"Forget what Dean will say. He is old leather. What would Allan say?" Augustine says. I mock glare at him. Honestly, the crush he has on Allan is adorable. Still, will it kill him, to show the rest of us some love? Not that I am not happy about Allan, but ever since he came into the picture, Augustine has been panting after him like a bitch in heat.

Note to self: talk Allan into participating into an orgy, so I can finally see Augustine totally losing it. 

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"I can speak the way I want," Dru waves a finger at Atha, who holds up his hands in defeat. "I am older than you! When you were googo and gagaing, I was already in harems!" 

"He was gagaing just twenty-five years ago," Vincent says. That seems to depress Dru because her shoulders slump.

 Oh, hell no! No one makes my fun granny sad!

I round up on Vincent, and move closer to him. He eyes me with suspicion, but doesn't seem to want to react. In one slick movement, I get him out of his seat on the couch, and into my lap. I swat him on the sides, showing him how displeased I am with him. Then, just because his bum is oh so very soft, yet firm, I swat him again, and enjoy the bounce back. 

"Are you spanking me right now?" Vincent shrieks. Honestly, what a Drama Queen. 

"What are you going to do about it," I ask, and then turn to Dru. "Drusila, honey. There are plenty of hot single men around your age in this area alone. I can totally hook you up with a couple."

"There are men who are one billion years old?" She asks me. I rise an eyebrow at that. 

"Really? One billion? I wouldn't even give you fifty," the truth is, I'd give her a 100, but her smile is worth the small white lie. "Anyway, what do you say? Hot singles in your area? Yes, or no?" 

I wiggle my eyebrows at her, for added benefit. She giggles, and hides her mouth with her hand. 

"Oh, you devil. I am at that age, where even one man to go to sleep to will be good. I just want to snuggle someone, you know?" She says. Vincent turns to look at me. 

"If you don't find Dru a husband, I will never sleep with you again," he threatens. I think it is cute that he has adopted the dungeon core he attacked, not too long ago, as a grandparent. The entire party, even Allan, is giving me looks. I give them all one of my best winning smiles. 

"One sexy stallion for Dru coming right up! I know just where to look at. Dru, do you have a painting of yourself, that I can show Mr. Right?" I ask, and wink at her. 

"Oh, I do have one. A recent one. From my last harem member," she gets up, and comes back with a painting that resembles her current state. Still, I can see that the painting was done with a lot of love.

Her white hair is shining, a perfect play on shadows and nuances. Her blue eyes are made to sparkle. Not only that, but her laugh lines are made to make her face pixie like.

 I compare the woman and the painting, and see that, now that I am looking at all those things, I can see that Dru was a looker, back in her day. Those grandpas won't know what hit them.