Chapter 60: Nine

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“Wow,” Everette says as he gets off his bum and uses a nearby tree to help him stand up. His eyes are fixed on the spot where the troll used to be. Technically it’s still there.

For once, you sort of agree with the boy. Abigail really did a number on the troll. You can still see most of its body. The arms and legs aren’t too badly mangled. The torso isn’t doing so well, though, what with the three new tree trunks growing into and then out of it.

You can’t help the wash of pride at the sight. It looks exactly like how you would get rid of the monster with your own tentacles, but this was all, or mostly all, Abigail’s work. “Good job!” you tell your summoner.

“Th-thanks,” Abigail says. Her eyes are very wide as she stares at the troll that is now part tree.

“Do you want to eat it?” You asked. It’s only fair that she gets the first choice of that yummy looking meat. Of course, Abigail could never eat all of that on her own, and you did help a bit, so you should get a share too. A big share... Most of it.

Daphne steps up next to Abigail, then wraps an arm around her shoulder and steers her away. “Dreamer, can you take care of that for us?” she asks before bringing Abigail away.

Well, if you’re being asked to eat the troll you won’t say no.

“Actually, can I have a bit?” Everette asks. “Just a, ah, haunch or something.” He pats Wuffles who has rejoined him on her big furry head. “Wuffles needs something to eat, you know.”

You huff. “Fine, I’ll share,” you say. This will be paying Wuffles back for all the times you napped while hugging her big fluffy sides.

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Summoning a bunch of tentacles, you concentrate until their sides are nice and sharp, then begin carving through tree and troll meat. The way bits of troll fly all over and flop against the ground with delicious meaty noises is very fun.

You flick aside one of the trolls thighs, bone and all, for Wuffles who catches it out of the air and growls playfully as she tears into it, both paws working to keep it pinned as she tears chunks of it apart. She’s a very messy eater. You take another bit and bring it over to Charlotte who found a place to sit on one of the branches that Abigail made.

“I’m more of a cooked meat sort of girl,” Charlotte says.

“It’s for your whip,” you explain.

She stares with one eyebrow rising, but takes out her whip and pokes the meat with it. A small seam along the whip’s side opens up, revealing a bunch of teeth that grab onto the meat and start gnawing away at it. “Well, that’s certainly going to handy next time I need to tell a boy to back off,” she says.

You shake your head. Any boy that wouldn’t be impressed by Charlie’s whip probably doesn’t deserve her attention in the first place.

Your tentacles set all of the meat aside into a big pile, then, because you’re a well mannered familiar and also the best, you pull out your plate and start shovelling the meat onto it while tipping the plate back so that all the giblets fall into your mouth. A couple of small tentacles pat the meat that’s going off course back towards your mouth.

Troll tastes a bit like the way farts smell, but more meaty. It’s not that bad, but you decide that you like the yummy food at the inn a lot better. You stop eating when you get to the yuckier bits of the troll meat and push those into the ground to feed the planet. You kind of took some of its energy after all, you should repay it at least a little.

“Okay, I’m done,” you say as you leave the grove that’s still filled with wild branches and go find Abigail who is waiting with Daphne rubbing her back.

“Dreamer,” Abigail says. She sighs. “Come here.”

You come, and then Abigail whips out a handkerchief and starts rubbing at your face while you make protesting noises. You know that if you don’t let her wipe your mouth she gets all huffy and then she’ll run after you if you try to avoid her.

“Such a messy eater,” she mutters.

“I used the plate,” you complain. She has no right to judge your eating habits when you’re eating with the same tools as her.

Abigail rolls her eyes, but there’s a smile tugging at her lips. “This is the part where I would usually say something like ‘don’t change’ but really, using a fork and knife wouldn’t be the end of the world.”

“It might be,” you sulk.

Daphne shakes her head. “We should head back.”

“No,” Abigail says right away. “We should keep going. Those bandits, they’re, well, they’re bandits. If we can do something to help, then it’s our responsibility to at least try.”

You’re pretty sure it’s not, but if Abigail says so, who are you to disagree? “Okay. I’ll go get the others.”

“Oh, I’m ready,” Charlotte says as she walks over. She’s wiping her hands on a bit of cloth. “I looked in the troll’s cave. Turns out my whip can glow, which is handy. Nothing but scraps I’m afraid. Not that I was expecting any great loot.”

“We’re ready to head out,” Everette says as he too comes over, a very full Wuffles by his side. She’s panting happy doggy breaths all over, a long troll bone still in her mouth where it’s getting covered in a steady stream of drool.

“Do you want to come with us, Daphne?” Abigail asks. “We could bring you back to the farmer’s place?”

“No, I’ll come with you. I’m an idiot for doing it, but I will,” Daphne grumps.

You grin at the lot of your friends, and Everette, then nod. Time for bandits.

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