Because it was night, the traffic was not congested, so he arrived at the office earlier than usual. As soon as he parked the car where he always parked and turned off the ignition, the phone rang. It was text
“Who is it?”
The moment he checked the text message on his cell phone, Inseop doubted his own eyes. The sender of the text was Lee Wooyeon.
“I have an important request, so please come now.”
It was rare for the word “request” to come out of Lee wooyeon’s mouth, but when the word “important” was added in front of it, it seemed that something had happened.
Choi Inseop hesitated. If he went to Lee Wooyeon now, he would have had to change clothes without sleeping for even an hour. He could also pretend that he didn’t see the text message. However, Inseop thought that Lee Wooyeon must have a reason for calling him.
Inseop started the car again. He parked the car and took the elevator up to the floor where Lee Wooyeon lived.
When he rang the doorbell, Lee Wooyeon opened the door without asking who it was.
“Sorry. You must be tired.”
There was no sign of urgency unlike the text message he sent at this time to ask for help on the smiling face.
“No. What’s going on?”
“Come in at once.”
Lee Wooyeon stepped aside, telling him to come inside. Choi Inseop hesitated for a moment, then entered the front door. This was the fourth time he had been to this house. It was easy to get used to, but he couldn’t help but feel nervous every time he came in.
Taking off his shoes, Inseop thought it was fortunate that he came wearing clean socks today.
“What would you like to drink?”
“I’m fine.”
“If I don’t give anything to my guest, I would feel sorry Can I get you some juice?”
“Then I would like a glass of water, please.”
Lee Wooyeon took water from the refrigerator. Inseop took the cup with both hands and said thank you. After taking a sip of water, Inseop asked him why he called him.
“What do you want me to do?”
“Can you give me a shoulder massage? My shoulders are tight, but I can’t reach them.”
At Lee Wooyeon’s absurd request, Inseop made a bewildered expression for a moment, then sighed and approached behind him.
“Where are you uncomfortable?”
With a small fist slightly clenched and a serious face asking, Lee Wooyeon couldn’t hold back his laughter and bent down.
“Ha ha ha ha ha.”
“…”
“Ha ha ha ha ha. Sorry. Do you really think I would have called my manager to give me a shoulder massage?”
“… you didn’t?”
“Do you think I look like that kind of asshole?”
It was a voice that sounded friendly even when he cursed. As Choi Inseop could not answer and stood muttering, Lee Wooyeon approached him and stretched out his hand. Every time he touched his body, he felt Inseop twitch.
Lee Wooyeon smiled and picked up the script that was on the table.
“Please read the opposite.”
“What?”
“I’m trying to rehearse the scene for tomorrow, but I can’t feel my emotions.”
“… So, are you asking me to read the lines of the other actors?”
Choi Inseop’s expression hardened coldly. It was as if he had heard a curse that he shouldn’t have heard.
“Yes. That’s it.”
“Someone like me… do you think it will help?”
“I called you because I thought you would be helpful.”
Lee Wooyeon answered shamelessly and sat down on the sofa. Choi Inseop stood with the script and looked at Lee Wooyeon.
“Are you serious?”
“Yes. I’m serious.”
He hadn’t gone to an academy that helped him distinguish between jokes and seriousness, but now he knew that those words were sincere. Inseop had no choice but to open the script.
“Sit down, here.”
“I will stand.”
“Sit down please. It must be difficult.”
Lee Wooyeon forcibly grabbed Inseop’s hand and pulled him to sit next to him. Inseop deliberately pretended that nothing was wrong and fumbled through the script and asked.
“Where do we start?”
Seeing him looking at the script with a serious expression, Wooyeon had to hold back his laughter. Anyone would be annoyed if he called them to read a script at this time, but Inseop didn’t have that.
There was a plan, but basically the person named Choi Inseop had a good personality. Lee Wooyeon, who was watching what Choi Inseop was thinking as his manager, caught his eye these days.
He suddenly thought that it would be great to get rid of the unexplained plan. If he fully poured his loyalty into himself like a kind person, he can use him for a long time as CEO Kim said.
But for some reason, Choi Inseop’s attitude was very questionable.
“From there on page 8, line 5. Would you like to read it?”
“… ”
Inseop’s face, who was holding the script, went hazy. Lee Wooyeon pretended not to notice and urged him. Choi Inseop’s eyes turned red. He looked like he was about to cry.
“From here.”
Lee Wooyeon pointed out which lines to read with his fingers, but Inseop couldn’t speak easily. Hesitating, he cast a hesitant look at Lee Wooyeon.
“What?”
“… I… This… ”
“As I said before, I have a weak understanding of love. It’s been a while since I’ve been in a proper relationship because I’ve been busy with acting. It’s a big problem.”
“…”
There was nothing wrong with Lee Wooyeon’s words. He did not have a proper relationship, but he just met girls.
“So please help me.”
It was a polite but earnest request. Choi Inseop had to recheck the lines that Lee Wooyeon pointed with his finger. Just reading it with his eyes seemed to raise his body temperature by several degrees. The line that started with the master was followed by embarrassing words. The lines made up of elegant old sayings were as sweet as the scent of flowers. No matter how many times Inseop read it, he didn’t have the courage to say it out loud.
As Choi Inseop sighed, Lee Wooyeon blinked slowly and asked him.
“Can’t you?”
“…”
“You can just read it. Like you bought a coffee machine and were reading the instruction manual.”
He didn’t know if any coffee machine instruction manual contained the phrase, ‘Master, please understand my heart’, but Inseop decided to think about it that way for now.
“young…mas… ter.”
It felt like a hundred eons had passed before he could say that one word. He felt a cold sweat.
“What next?”
“… Can’t we just go ahead with what I said?”
“I can’t. Then I would’ve done it alone. Why would I request the manager for help in the middle of the night? Please. Read.”
When the word “request” came out of Lee Wooyeon’s mouth, Inseop let out a big sigh. He had never felt as arduous as today. He opened his eyes and stared at the script. Just reading the letters on the paper made the hairs on his body stand up.
“Young… young master. Girl… in the mind of … so that day… . From that day…”
Inseop stuttered and read the lines like a child who first learned Korean. It was pitiful how much he stuttered and his voice trembled.
Lee Wooyeon looked at the script with a serious expression on his face.
Calling Choi Inseop back to his house was ridiculous even now.
As soon as the face of the manager, who had been trying to go to his house where a bitch named Kate was waiting, came to mind, Lee Wooyeon felt annoyed. He didn’t like the manager’s choice to go home to her to spend less than two hours with her.
He was putting up with Choi Inseop, who had a plan, but he was going to give the woman water? The most disturbing thing was that he had said that he was going to water her in front of him. Inseop, who looked clueless and used such vulgar expressions, offended the mood of Wooyeon.
As soon as he imagined the scene where the innocent manager gasped in front of the body of a woman, he texted Inseop to come here. He was going to send him home after disciplining the son of a bitch a few times, but when I saw Inseop trembling like a drowning puppy, he changed his mind.
All night long, he’ll have to read the script.
“Read more. There’s a long way to go.”
“… I can’t.”
Inseop put the script down on his lap and wept. Lee Wooyeon felt better whenever Choi Inseop cried. He liked that close-up look that looked like he was going to burst into tears at any moment.
He preferred a frown on the other person’s smile if he had to hide his anger. His expressions of sadness, pain, or distress caught his attention.
He overheard his doctor explaining to his parents that it was a common occurrence for antisocial disorder and sadistic tendencies to coexist. He said he was still young, so he couldn’t make a diagnosis, so he told her to keep an eye on him.
His mother, who had grown up without any resentment, came to the bedside of her sleeping son every night and cried and prayed. She wanted her son to get better.
Every time her son showed a different side from others, his mother held his hands and told him over and over again. It’s not that he was bad, it was that he had a disease in his mind. Just as the body suffers from diseases, the mind also suffers, but this was by no means a bad thing. It was a little worse than the others, but he can fix it, so not to worry, his mother used to tell him as if she was making a promise to herself.
As a child, he listened to his mother and thought.
‘So, does that mean my mind is sick? Fuck, what a relief. It’s hard to hide physical pain!’
From that time on, he began to observe and imitate the attitudes of ordinary people. The habit of the body made Lee Wooyeon who he is today, but he could not completely erase his natural tendency.
He felt good when he looked up at Choi Inseop who had an expression that said he was uncomfortable. Inseop’s brown eyes with slightly raised eyebrows made Lee Wooyeon satisfied.
Like now.
“You can just read it. You know how to read Korean.”
“…”
“Don’t think that you’re saying it, just read it. It’s convenient if you think you’re reading to someone other than me. Like Eunbyul.”
Inseop read the lines in the script again and took a deep breath.
Choi Eunbyeol, who took on the role of Lee Soohyun, who was the opposite of Lee Wooyeon, was a new actress who had just turned 20. Because of her excellent acting skills in the Oriental Beauty Award, she received people’s attention when she was cast for the role of Soohyeon. Lee Soohyeon, played by Choi Eunbyeol, was Lee Wonsik’s younger sister, and was not the traditional female figure of the Joseon Dynasty, but an enterprising woman. She was the heroine who actively confesses her love to Kim Youngha, played by Choi Inseop, expresses her heart, and creates her own destiny. Conservative Kim Youngha initially resented her, but gradually opened up to her, but eventually came to a tragic end due to differences in status and faction problems.
“Have you seen Eunbyul acting? You can think of that image and do it.”
“… ”
Looking at Lee Wooyeon, he remembered the face of the actor who played the role that ended in a tragic love. It became even more difficult to read the lines.
Inseop licked his lips a few times and finally shook his head.
“Sorry. Really… I can’t.”
When he was in school in the United States, he participated in a play only once. It was the role of a standing waving leave from behind without dialogue. In fact, there was one line, but the teacher removed the line in consideration for him, who was shaking like an aspen tree.
“Really? Then there is nothing we can do.”
Lee Wooyeon showed a slight disappointment and put the script in Choi Inseop’s hand on the table.
“I’m going to be a little lost tomorrow. I can’t sleep all night, so I’ll have to practice the script. Then go in first.”
Lee Wooyeon smiled and said. With that lonely smile, Inseop couldn’t get up from the sofa. Whatever the reason, he had to be Lee Wooyeon’s capable manager now.
“You may go, Mr. Inseop. I’m sorry for asking too much.”
Lee Wooyeon was a natural actor. With that single word, it naturally made the other person feel remorse.
“ … that… excuse me… then… I’ll do it.”
Instead, Choi Inseop immediately added a condition.
“I will look back. I hope Lee Wooyeon will turn around as well.”
That was the greatest consideration that Inseop could do.
Just reading the lines made him cringe to death, but it was impossible to do this face to face with someone.
Besides, it was Lee Wooyeon, not someone else. He couldn’t say anything to confess his love for Lee Wooyeon.
“Are you going to do facing back?”
It was a disappointing proposal for Lee Wooyeon. He wanted to see the scene where Inseop trembled and spit out girlish lines that didn’t suit him.
“Yes… If you’re okay with this.”
If he spoke with his back turned, he could have imagined that it was not Lee Wooyeon. Inseop believed so.
“If Inseop is like that, I can’t do anything.”
Lee Wooyeon sat down with Inseop’s back turned away from him Choi Inseop picked up the script on the table.
“From the beginning of page 3.”
“All right.”
It was better not to see each other face to face. Inseop thought that the person behind him was someone other than Lee Wooyeon. At times like this, he was grateful for his rich imagination.
Inseop read the lines slowly, as written in the script, in a dry tone like a person reading a coffee machine instruction manual.
“The Threefold Path says that a virtuous woman should follow, but the girl…”
Inseop coughed in vain.
“The girl has already decided in her heart who she wants to follow. So, my brother…”
“Wonshik, are you there?”
Inseop couldn’t help but be surprised by the voice he heard from behind. It was said that historical dramas differ from modern dramas in the tone and vocalization of their voices, but when he listened to them so closely, he felt like a completely different person.
Inseop eagerly began to find his lines and read them.
“Do, the master…”
Even if he tried to think that he was just reading a novel, he was worried about the name Lee Wooyeon called behind his back, so he started stuttering again.
“Uh, for some reason, I’m here…”
“The next line is from Kang Youngmo, so I’ll move on.”
A strong voice followed the soft voice.
“I’ve come to you with something to share with you.”
From then on, it was a scene where Kang Youngmo and Lee Wooyeon had a verbal battle. Inseop, wondering what to do now, held his breath and waited for Lee Wooyeon’s instructions.
“The lines start on page 5.”
Inseop hurriedly turned over the script. From there, it was a scene where the two shared their hearts in the backyard.
“Gi, girl…, gi, girl…”
The person behind his back is not Lee Wooyeon. It’s not Lee Wooyeon. Not Lee Wooyeon… Even though it was Kim Youngha, his heart was pounding. His tongue did not move freely. Inseop sweated and read the lines slowly.
His stuttering can be frustrating, but Lee Wooyeon quietly waited for Inseop’s line to end.
“The girl… Ma, Master… Le, let me tell you…”
“I will be waiting here, so please speak slowly.”
Inseop felt guilty as he suddenly seemed to have made the other person’s role stutter. He doubted whether reading these lines would be of any help.
“I have someone in my heart…”
He could feel Lee Wooyeon slowly nodding his head from behind. It was a move according to the script. Choi Inseop read the lines written in the script. It was a scene where Soohyeon showed the thimble she received from Youngha when she was young and said that there is only one Jeongin in her heart.
“This insignificant thimble is a sign that my heart belongs to him.”
Having said that, he had to smile while putting the thimble into his finger.
It was nothing but a line. He could read the text without emotion, but his hands were shaking. Choi Inseop grabbed the script with all his might. I thought it was fortunate that Lee Wooyeon, who was sitting back to back, did not see that his hand was shaking.
He was hopeless. Sitting like that, with a cold sweat from a single line with no meaning.
Reading this didn’t mean he was speaking his heart.
‘No, my heart is already dead…’
“You can read the next line.”
His face heated up at the calming voice he heard from behind. It sounded like an interrogation to reveal the truth quickly, so he couldn’t even raise his head.
Why the hell was he here? Maybe he was fulfilling his greed under the pretext of sacrificing for Jenny.
Inseop stared at the letters on the script. He held back tears from welling up.
These words were not his heart. His heart was no longer here.
Because he had to hate Lee Wooyeon. No, because he hated him.
Suppressing his emotions as much as possible, Inseop read the lines.
“This insignificant thimble is my heart… uh…?”
The next words did not continue. Choi Inseop quickly covered his nose with his palm and tilted his head back. Lee Wooyeon turned around.
“What’s wrong? Do you have a nose bleed?”
“… Yes.”
“You can’t tilt your head like that.”
Lee Wooyeon took a tissue and put it under Inseop’s nose and said.
“The blood runs all the way back. Lean forward like this.”
Choi Inseop bowed his head forward as Lee Wooyeon told him. Dark red blood quickly dripped onto the tissue.
“I;m sorry. On the script… ”
Inseop pointed to the blood that had fallen on the script.
“If you have time to worry about that, take more care of yourself.”
“I’m sorry.”
“If you say you’re sorry one more time, I won’t make you the fan club president.”
Making light threats mixed with jokes, Lee Wooyeon pulled out more tissues and wiped Inseop’s face.
“I am…”
“Stay still. The blood is still flowing.”
Inseop quietly waited for the nosebleed to stop. It was a nosebleed after a long time. In the past, there were times when he woke up with a nosebleed and his pillow was soaked with blood.
“It still hasn’t stopped.”
“Yes…”
“Lie down.”
Lee Wooyeon grabbed Inseop’s shoulder and pulled him back.
“No, just…”
“Lie on your side. Like this.”
It was impossible to overcome Lee Wooyeon by force. Inseop was forced to lay down on the sofa.
“Are you tired?”
“I’m fine.”
It was probably a mental stress issue rather than fatigue. Inseop had always been like that. The next day, when he had an important exam or something he didn’t want to do, he would have a nosebleed.
“You know what doesn’t look all right?”
“…”
“Your face has turned white, your eyes are puffy, and your nose is bleeding. Isn’t this how Inseop will fall? I don’t know if I should ask to change you with someone else.”
“No! You can’t.”
Inseop jumped up and desperately insisted that he was okay.
“The nosebleed is not because of tiredness, but because of stress. It’s really ok. I can work.”
“Stress?”
“…!”
“Do you bleed when you are stressed? So reading the script here right now was very stressful, you mean?”
“That, that…”
“In what scene? The scene here where you put the thimble on your finger and kiss the cheek? Or is it the scene of hugging Kim Youngha’s back as he turns around?”
“… Are there scenes like that?”
The nosebleed, which had barely stopped, dripped again. Lee Wooyeon clicked his tongue, pressed Inseop’s nose with a tissue, and laid him down on the sofa.
Inseop closed his eyes as Lee Wooyeon looked down at him. He was terribly ashamed. The fact that he was stressed enough to bleed from just reading the script. And the fact that he recognized Lee Wooyeon as well.
It was miserable because the harder he tried, the more messy it seemed. As he closed his eyes, he felt a rush of tiredness that he had forgotten.
“But when you’re really stressed, does your nose bleed?”
“…sometimes.”
He used to get nosebleeds a lot when he was a teenager, but as an adult he didn’t bleed so much that he forgot that he had this condition. He thought it was a thing of the past, but over and over, the old faces of Peter suddenly appeared here.
Choi Inseop had to admit that he was now confined to his mental limit. It was so lonely. It was lonely and difficult, so he was mentally exhausted enough to want anyone to be by his side. The energy left in his body was used to hate Lee Wooyeon, so he didn’t even have the strength to lift a finger.
Tiring.
As soon as he realized that, fatigue came over him like death.
“Did you hate coming here?”
“Of course I…”
“It’s the manager’s duty, something like that. When I called at this hour, you didn’t want to come, did you?”
Normally he would have answered no. It’s nothing, it’s not a big deal if he didn’t sleep for a day, and that he could endure even more difficult tasks. He had to say it was nothing.
“…Yes. I hated it.”
When the honest answer came, Lee Wooyeon smiled a little. Inseop wondered what kind of expression he was making. He had to open his eyes and look at him, but lifting his eyelids was so difficult that it seemed impossible now.
“Why are you sitting still when you’re stressed out like that?”
“…”
It would be nice if that could be the case… He wanted to leave. He wanted to go out… But why does Lee Wooyeon’s voice sound so sweet? He loved it…
Due to extreme fatigue, Inseop could not contain the thoughts that came to his head and left him there.
“You can leave.”
Lee Wooyeon patted Inseop’s shoulder with the palm of his hand and continued.
“If you don’t like it that much, you can just turn your back and walk away.”
It was a soft voice, as if whispering a lullaby into a baby’s ear. Every time Lee Wooyeon touched his palm, he could feel Inseop’s shoulder twitch. So he didn’t stop patting.
From the day that Lee Wooyeon realized that the way he felt was different from other people, he made no effort to understand others. It was enough to memorize behaviors that were not understood.
However, the person named Choi Inseop was someone he could not understand. He couldn’t figure out whether he liked him or hated him. He was too sacrificial to a person he didn’t like, and his attitude toward him was disappointing for a person he did like.
He thought he would be able to distinguish them clearly if he put them next to each other, but it became increasingly difficult to judge them.
The fact that the manager, who was so sacrificial that he ran here without expressing disgust at a single text message, was so stressed that he had a nosebleed made him feel uncomfortable.
He felt like he was in a bad mood.
“Mr. Choi Inseop. If you don’t like it that much, just quit and leave.”
“…”
Lee Wooyeon grabbed Inseop’s slender shoulder with the palm of his hand, as if hugging him.
If Choi Inseop said he was leaving, he was going to fire him today. He didn’t want to hold onto someone who hated him so much.
He liked that Choi Inseop made a troubled expression towards him or felt embarrassed, but he didn’t want him to seriously hate him
He knew it didn’t exactly make sense, but it did.
Lee Wooyeon was determined to get rid of Inseop before it got more complicated. It was a pity that he’ll miss coffee and food brought in every morning according to his taste, and perfect song selection that seemed to fit the mood of the day. Also the meticulous workmanship that never made a single mistake.
Most of all, it was a pity that he could not see the big, frightened eyes that looked carefully at him again. But he hated him so much, he didn’t need to be patient anymore.
“You can answer honestly.”
However, the answer did not come back after a long time.
“Mr. Inseop. Are you still thinking?”
Lee Wooyeon bowed his head and looked at the manager’s face. It wasn’t long before Inseop, who he thought had just closed his eyes, confirmed that he had fallen asleep.
Amazing.
How could a person who was bleeding due to stress fall asleep in such a situation?
“haha… Ha ha ha ha ha… haha, …Well, this bastard.”
The laughter didn’t stop. It was just absurd to be in an unpredictable situation.
He got up from his seat and swallowed a smirk , then looked at the manager’s face again. He felt like an idiot for thinking about things that were not right for even a moment.
“Fuck, Choi Inseop…!”
Lee Wooyeon stretched out his hand to wake Choi Inseop from sleep, and then opened his eyes slightly. Choi Inseop was crying. His long eyelashes were tangled with tears.
It was a pitiful appearance that aroused cruel curiosity.
Lee Wooyeon suddenly remembered the poor puppy he had picked up out of curiosity when he was young. It was not known whether it had been abandoned or left the house, but the dog, deprived of love, was trembling with fear. He was intrigued by the little creature’s grunt, trying to get sympathy for his existence.
But the curiosity didn’t last long. The dog had been crying all night and had trouble sleeping. Eventually, at dawn, he took the dog and put it back where he had found it. The next morning he went to the place where his sister was having a riot and found the dog dead. He was not surprised. Because it was a natural result. It was raining and it was a cold day, so it was quite predictable.
But within that day, the younger sister cried as if the world had ended. Besides, the younger brother shouted that his brother had killed the dog.
He did not fully understand his sister’s accusations against him.
It wasn’t his fault, and it was the criticism that he couldn’t understand at all about what a big problem it would be to put back something that he had been holding for a while.
In the end, his sister did not speak to him for a month after that day. He also had to listen to a lot of admonitions about responsibility from his parents.
There was definitely a lesson to be learned at that time.
‘Do not pick up anything on the road. And once you pick it up, you must not let it go until you die due to the problem of responsibility.’
The problem was that his curiosity quickly cooled as he waited for the animal to die naturally. The only way to get rid of boredom was to kill animals. However, he never picked up an animal after that day, knowing that the nagging and post-processing that followed would be a nuisance after killing an animal. Even when he was dating a woman or sleeping with them, he never did anything that made him responsible.
Seeing the manager crumpled up like a mop and sleeping on the sofa, Lee Wooyeon remembered the wet dog crying in the rain. He memorized the human face. He did not forget the expression he had seen once because it was a training he had been repeating since he was young. He didn’t know if he knew, but that was exactly what Choi Inseop was feeling right now. The fear of a young puppy abandoned by the world.
Seeing the manager sleeping on the sofa trembling, Lee Wooyeon thought.
‘Did I pick up another son of a bitch?’
A complex emotion, neither particularly pleasant nor unpleasant, crossed over him.
The good news was that this bastard was trembling with fear, but didn’t cry.
Instead of waking him up, he wiped the tears from Inseop’s eyes. Choi Inseop curled up like a shrimp and wrapped his hands around his shoulders.
“… chu…”
In his sleep, Inseop muttered a little and crouched down.
Lee Wooyeon took a blanket from the bedroom and put it over Choi Inseop’s body. Now it was the best kindness one could give to a puppy.