Chapter 17: 17

My name is Takanashi Momo.

I am a junior high school student this year.

I have a secret that I can’t tell anyone.

I am a magical girl.

One day, I met a mysterious fairy who turned me into a magical girl.

Magical girl. I had seen them in manga and anime, but I never thought I could really become one.

The first time I transformed into a magical girl and used magic, I had so much fun that I spent the whole day in high spirits.

Lately, my mom and dad are worried about a ghost called “Wanderer”.

Now that I am a magical girl, I am sure I can protect everyone.

But even though I became a magical girl, I didn’t really know what to do.

After making me a magical girl, the fairy told me that I should go to a magical girl school and then went away.

I didn’t know where the magical girl school was, so I was at a loss, but perhaps my strong wish came true, and the door to the magical girl school appeared in front of me.

From now on, I would learn here, defeat ghosts, and be praised by many people.

I was filled with happiness.

I was clumsy and not very smart, and there were times when I made my father and mother feel sad.

Even if I, who don’t have any good points could still be useful to someone.

At that time, I had no doubt in my mind that it was my chance.

My life at the Magical Girl School was very fulfilling.

I normally went to junior high school and was a normal student.

On my days off, I went to a magical girl school to study magic and learn what a magical girl does.

Sometimes my mother asked me where I went on days off, but I kept it a secret.

I wanted to surprise her when I become a splendid magical girl.

Every time the senior magical girls reported that they had defeated the “Wanderer”, everyone would get excited.

Someday, I wanted to be a heroic and cool magical girl who could save everyone, just like my seniors.

My heart swelled with anticipation.

And finally, the time has come to learn how to defeat the “Wanderer”, which is very important for magical girls.

It was time to follow the magical girl seniors, see “Wanderer” with my own eyes, and learn how to defeat them.

I was, I was, terrified. I was scared.

I couldn’t stand the malice emanating from “Wanderer”, and I just held my head and trembled.

I couldn’t use purification magic, I couldn’t watch and learn from my seniors, I couldn’t do anything.

My senpai consoled me, saying that there are some children like me.

But, if I stay like that then there’s no point in me becoming a magical girl.

I, wanted meaning in me becoming a magical girl.

I had to defeat Wanderer, I had to save someone.

Because that must be the reason why I became a magical girl.

The opportunity came suddenly.

The “Wanderer” appeared near my junior high school.

It happened right in front of us on our way home from school.

When the red eyes covered in black slime stared at me, my legs trembled.

I felt sick, dizzy, and my teeth were chattering.

My friend next to me was also trembling and crouching down.

But this was also an opportunity.

The meaning of me becoming a magical girl had come to me on it’s own.

If I could overcome this, my mother, father, friends, and everyone at Magical Girl’s School will praise me.

It will affirm that the meaning of me becoming a magical girl lies there.

I psyched up myself, transformed, used all the magic, and I, I…

Lost.

I couldn’t do anything.

I did everything I could to protect my friends and everyone else, but the malice and madness that flowed through me when I touched “Wanderer” consumed me, and before I knew it, I was in the hospital.

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I was told that the “Wanderer” was defeated by a magical girl who entered the school at the same period as me.

The damage was minimal, and my senpai praised me for my hard work.

But it was different. It’s no good.

I, if I don’t save everyone, it’s no good.

Otherwise, there’s no point in me becoming a magical girl.

Why didn’t you save them.

Someone inside me is blaming me.

Why didn’t you save them.

I, didn’t have any kind of qualifications to become a magical girl.

Why, didn’t you, save them.

Someone, please save me.

After I was discharged from the hospital, I quit junior high school.

I couldn’t go to school anymore because they found out I was a magical girl.

I moved where I lived.

I became known as a useless magical girl.

Every day, I had no motivation to do anything.

People from the Magical Girl Committee often visited me, but I didn’t want them to care about a useless person like me.

Every time the adults looked at me with pity, I felt miserable.

Even though I became a magical girl, I couldn’t do anything.

Every day on the newspaper, I read about the things the magical girls achieved.

I also wanted to be active like them and praised by everyone.

I wanted a reason, a trigger.

I believed that there must be something that would move my legs, which were no longer able to move forward.

There were days when my mother and father weren’t around.

The usual newspaper was a special one that could be bought at a nearby convenience store.

I was afraid to go outside, but I wanted to see the newspaper, so I gathered my courage and went to the convenience store.

Today’s magical girl was one I had never seen before, but she was very pretty and cooler than any magical girl I had ever seen.

I couldn’t make out her face, and the only picture I could make out was her back, but even so, she looked confident.

I went to the counter to buy the newspaper, and just like with the other newspaper, I hoped that it would give me courages.

At that moment, I heard a happy voice from behind the counter.

I had not noticed before, but the clerk at the convenience store was a small child, about the age of an elementary school student.

Even such a small child can work, compared to that, I…

I almost felt self-loathing because I was comparing myself to a child younger than myself.

But when I noticed that she was reading the special feature on magical girls, I ended up talking to her.

“Magical girls, do you like them? You were reading the special feature right?”

I talked to her as if I was talking to a friend.

It was a mistake.

I didn’t mean to make her uncomfortable.

Just, if it’s this child then, she could teach me the meaning of me becoming a magical girl, is what I thought.

I thought she would affirm me, me who couldn’t move forward, me who is disqualified as a magical girl.

She listened to the words I had spoken out of self-loathing.

And she taught me.

She told me to cheer on, to support, the children who have failed.

Even if at that moment that child is disqualified as a hero, someday, surely that child will become a hero.

That’s why she told me to keep cheering them on.

Is it fine, for me to be a magical girl.

Is it fine, for me to keep walking on this path.

If even someone like me, can still call be called a hero then, someone, please give me, magical girl “Quartz”, your support…!

T/N: Sooo, there are a lot of subtle reveals and things to connect so far, here is the list

Roze lives in the development zone (the one for the Ministry of Monster Countermeasure) Magical girls are all kids (elementary to junior high school) According to the store manager the number of young students that came increased The newspaper with magical girl special feature is different from the normal one According to the Roze the words/comments used on the magical girl special feature in newspapers are all positive All the land in the development zone is bought or is receiving support from the government

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