Chapter 295: For You
3rd March 2013, Sayre Manor
(Jasmine Sayre POV)
I needed to talk to her, to confront her. I needed to know the truth. This wasn't even about Rose anymore. Her loss from my life, while regrettable, can be dealt with. But Selene betraying me is simply unacceptable.
My thoughts were interrupted by noise from outside the door, and I realized that I had stayed staring at this husk of a body for hours without moving. Immediately, I wave my hand, and everything returned to the way it was, and I teleport home.
My mind was reeling with possibilities and justifications, but there was nothing concrete. I knew that there was something, that I was close. It was on the tip of my tongue, but I was just drawing a blank.
I made my way to our bedroom. Selene was sitting on our balcony, sipping her tea. I steeled myself and entered the balcony for our inevitable confrontation. I just hope that I wouldn't lose her by the end of it as well. The moment I entered; Selene looked at me.
She must have seen that something was wrong because she looked worried suddenly, "my love, what's wrong?"
I gave her a serious look, "We need to talk."
If she was perturbed by my statement or tone, she didn't show it. Instead, she gave me sad smile and spoke up, "It seems like we do…"
I sat in the seat in front of her, looking straight into her eyes, "It was you, wasn't it? You destroyed the Court of Shadows. You killed all those people."
Selene didn't even bat an eyelash when she said, "I didn't expect you to find out this quickly. I have to say even after so much time together, you still manage to impress me."
I gave her an incredulous look, "You used your signature ability. Literally, no one else on the planet can suck the life force so completely out of someone. You knew that I would investigate their deaths since they're supposed to be Rose's conquest. You knew that I would find out it was you without any problems. The only question is why did you do all of this?"
"You really don't know, do you? You haven't figured it out when it's right in front of you. I knew that you would find out that it would be me, but by the time you do, it would be too late. It is too late for you to take it back. The ink is dry, and the past is set. I have won."
"You're not making any sense Selene." I protested.
"No, my love, I'm making perfect sense, you just don't know it yet. Do you have any idea how much effort it took to track down every single member of the Court of Shadows and mark them so that they would all be part of a global ritual, at the exact same moment, on the exact same day? I spent months preparing for this and looking at you, I'd say that it was more than worth it."
I raised an eyebrow, not understanding what the hell she was getting at. But what I did gather was the fact that what she was planning concerned me in particular, "So, it wasn't about Rose, then? You weren't jealous or anything?"
Selene scoffed, "Why would I feel jealous of that little entitled mortal girl? She's barely more than a pet. In a blink of an eye, she will wither and die, as all mortals do. I only have to wait for her inevitable death if I dislike her. And believe me, I do dislike her. She might have been your family once, but we both know how entitled she was becoming. I don't mind the other two; at least they're respectful and understanding.
"But that former sister of yours, she kept complaining about things that any mage in the world would kill to have and demanding that you be part of a family you dislike. She irked me, but not enough to do anything about it. However, I can't deny that I didn't enjoy seeing her get out of your life permanently."
"So, you didn't want to ruin my plan for her?"
My wife snorted, "That wasn't a plan, Morrigan. You were just hoping for her to take over a position that you stopped wanting but were too stubborn to leave."
"I did not wish to abandon the magical world…"
Even to me, the argument felt weak. She was right, I did force myself to accept the position as the guardian of the magical world because of my guilt for not acting to protect it when I was still in the time loop. In the end, the witch hunts had to happen so that the Statute of Secrecy could be put together.
It was history, a fixed point in time that I couldn't change. That was the worst of it, seeing the hundreds of thousands of children screaming while being burnt just for the sin of being wizards and witches. I couldn't save any of them. I was forbidden. I was bound by the chains of time and fate. And I hated it. It was one of the darkest moments of my life when I came the closest to breaking entirely. Selene had comforted me, and consoled me, while I was slowly coming apart. I can see now that I was mistaken, that my affection was illogical. What happened to these people was illogical, but there was nothing to feel guilty about. It wasn't my fault. I physically could not help them; hence the blame cannot be put on me. This also meant that it was a lie, my entire devotion to the magical world, to the legacy of Atlantis, was a lie.
It felt oddly freeing to admit this. The magical world was not my responsibility, it was never my responsibility, and the role I took upon myself to protect them was unnecessary. I had taken into account that as long as the Earth still has magic, mages and humans will remain in separate worlds. I cannot keep babysitting them. It was time for them to deal with their messes.
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Selene's voice broke through my thoughts, "You don't believe that."
I nodded, "You're right, I don't. What I did was as meaningless as it was illogical. But not all things are rooted in logic, Selene. You should know that."
For the first time in this conversation, Selene sneered at me, "Don't give me all that about love. I know that love is as beautiful as it is painful. Do you realize how much it killed me to see you always keep your hopes up with one mortal after another, losing bits and pieces of yourself after every death, natural or not? And here I was always picking up the pieces. I love you, Morrigan, but loving you hurts a lot more than it should."
Stunned into silence, I thought back to her words and sighed, "I can see your point, but we're not here to talk about the past. I am no longer bound by the time loop and have no desire to meet with mortals. You're changing the subject. Tell me, why you would do this to Rose?"
The black witch snorted, "You still haven't realized, have you? Rose was never my goal. Yes, it might seem that way, and she was a pawn in my plan, but the endgame didn't have anything to do with her, not at all. The endgame was always you, my love."
"I don't understand."
Selene burst into laughter, "That's fitting isn't it, for you to be on the other side of things. For the first time, the mighty Morrigan finally accepts the fact that she doesn't know better. I never cared enough about Rose Potter to do anything about her. I disliked her on principle, but she was no better than your usual mortal. She was greedy, prideful, and full of anger and Jealousy. It wasn't that big of a deal. No, what mattered was who she was to you. She was your sister and you truly had accepted this fact."
"Yes, she was. But what does that have to do with anything?"
My wife gave me a gleeful smile, "Everything. I wasn't even involved in the mess with the British branch of the Court of Shadows. But I saw a plan forming. The girl was ready to snap while blaming you for everything that went bad. All she needed was one last push for her to fully despise you. I didn't even mean for her parents to die; it was just a lucky coincidence. I only needed her to think that you were a monster who killed the Court members. And don't kid yourself you've done far worse things than that."
I did do a lot worse things in my time as the Avatar of Death, but those days were behind me now. But what was disturbing was the fact that Selene didn't care about Rose, she just wanted me to feel her betrayal.
I looked her straight in the eye and spoke in an even tone, "Your plan was for her to betray me, to denounce me as her sister?"
She nodded, "Yes, it was."
"Why?"
Selene chuckled at that, "Why indeed. The funny thing is that the fact was staring at you right in the face. I wanted you to feel betrayed by your own kin. You're such an emotional being, even if you try to hide it, you feel so deeply. With that betrayal, you would let go of your control, of your powers, especially of the cosmic core that you barely know how to control."
It did make sense. I did feel my powers rage and boil from my emotions back then. But my wife wasn't done, she continued, "I wanted you to feel a deep grief, and finally let go. More specifically I wanted you to lose control over your Death powers."
I could see where this was going now, and muttered to myself "No, you wouldn't."
The Black witch cackled, "I would, I definitely would. You spent hours looking at her unconscious body with your Death perception and with it, you were slowly losing your humanity. You're no longer shackled now. You realize it don't you, that you were so clinical and logical ever since yesterday, ever since you set Rose aside and denounced her as your sister. You've been calmer and more collected. Even now, in the past you would have been screaming at me, cursing me for the horrors I committed. You would have been horrified by the people I killed, the people I drained. Hell, you would have even been horrified that I started draining people again. I didn't even do it because I needed the life force, I didn't need this much of it. No, I did it because I liked the feeling and missed it. Talk about hitting three birds with one stone, I got rid of that whiny little mortal girl, I destroyed the organization that could have complicated things for us, and I finally got you to grow up and accept the fact that you're not human anymore."
She was right. Looking back, I was overly clinical when I tracked down the Potters' killers. Hogwarts must have realized it during my visit. I scanned the energy left in me by Erebus. There was still a good chunk left, but most of it was gone now. My Celestial side was showing, and I didn't know what was happening.
I will admit that I am not human anymore. I cannot even pretend to be one now even if I wanted to. I was something else, something more, on a fundamental level. But even with the muted emotions I could still feel the sting of the betrayal that my wife had committed, "Why would you do this to me?"
"To you," she exclaimed, "I did it FOR you. You can't even judge me for it. After all, you're just like me now."
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