Chapter 1: God is a d*ck

 Silence for the first time since the beginning reigned over heaven. No singing, no praises, no talking and no squabbling. Dove the princess of heaven stared at a golden plate with a red apple that shined with holy radiance. Her little bird that she named Jemmy constantly pecked at her, eager to get her attention. Dove didn't sit at her seat in the great feasting hall which was beside Jesus who stared at his sister with sorrowful eyes that were alight as flames. 

Dove turned to look at the other occupants of the feasting hall. There was the divine council, gods under the trinity under her, next was the archangels, seraphim, the thrones and the cherubim. The seraphim were always by the godhead, but Dove commanded that they stay away from her. Archangel Michael was eating a medium rare steak, his knife sliced through the season meat, the juicies poured out as he stabbed his fork into it. Beside him was Gabriel who didn't eat at all, his tear stained cheeks making his grief apparent to all. 

Lastly was the Father, and Dove frowned, her hair raising, and becoming as wavy and chaotic as fire. It was his fault. He ruined everything, he caused Lucifer to do this. Dove swallowed, holding back the tears with all of her strength.

"Dove, talk to me please," said Jemmy, flapping his wings for emphasis. Jemmy was a white Dove, almost the most normal thing in this room.

Dove swallowed and picked up her apple. Its skin peeled away strip by strip." No Jemmy, I must contain myself. Supernovas are beautiful, don't you think?" Far away in a distinct portion of the universe was a star living through its last moments. It desperately called out to the Father, but he won't answer, the conceited bastard would never help unless it helped his own ego. With the last strip peeled, the star exploded, its death screamed filled with despair and fear. The wave of its flames unleashed a orgy of destruction as planets cracked apart under its last moment.

Jemmy stayed silent, knowing better to not push the matter. Not that Dove would punish him, she isn't a cruel god. 

The peeled apple turned into a collection of small people, all with swords in hand. She sighed, looking at one of the apple men.

A loud bell rang throughout the hall, signaling the start of the meeting. The Father leaned forward while stroking his beard." Let's bring up the next agenda. Heaven will need to undergo more repairs after the great betrayal and to remove all traces of the betrayer." Dove glared at the Father, the fury reached a boiling point. The apple men attacked each other, slaughtering their fellow apple man with unexplained hatred. What was left was spilled juices, and terror.

"No, you will do no such thing. I will not allow you. The betrayer has a name, please say it." No one but Dove was brave enough to speak to the Father like that. She was the one that always did that." I will take his statues, clothes, and the rest of his belongings in my garden." She picked up one of the apple men, and placed him in her mouth. Holy teeth grinded up apple guts and blood, her familiar Jemmy jumped on her shoulder, ready to defend her.

All eyes were on her from the lesser gods to the mighty archangels. Dove didn't care, she said what her will was and that was it. Placing her hand on the arm of the chair, she looked down briefly at the Golden imagery.' Oh Lucifer, why couldn't you destroy this throne. Why did you have to do this?' She thought before looking up at the Father who had a circle of fire beginning to engulf him. 

"You dare! You dare say no to me!" Each word was like thunder but Dove was a mountain against such barrage." Have you forgotten that he ruined the golden city? That he attempted to strike me! Me of all beings that he had the gall to strike, yet you continue to defend him."

"By Grandfather, you are an egotist. Me, me and me is all you care about. Before Lucifer, you had the seraphim worship you without end. The ego you have surpasses even the personification of Desire." Dove stood up, her bare feet heating up like molten metal." You need us, you know. Jesus holds all of heaven together because he isn't an asshole. I created the Golden city, what would it be without my artistic talent? It will be garbage." Dove didn't have any fear of the Father, why would she? All of the trinity were co-rulers, all but Grandfather. Grandfather was unknowable even to the Father and he was the true God. He was in hell, and across the multiverse

The silence was terrifying, two members of the godhead at odds with each other. Lesser gods could destroy planets, and at most a solar system. A fight between two members of the godhead would break reality.

The Father slammed his hand on his throne, breaking the silence with a thunderous shout." Fine then! Get out, take the traitor's throne and get out of my sight." Dove shook, not out of fear but rage. She roared, and somewhere a star was born as her rage brought forth new life. Grabbing the two arms of the throne, she lifted it. Reality opened up, it screamed as a newborn crying for their mother. 

"Don't bother coming to my room. I will have some angels fetch the rest of his stuff." She said, Jemmy hurrying landed on her shoulder as she entered the hole, and reality repaired itself based on her whims.

The realm of Dove was full of colors, pillows, and the smell of mint. It changed based on her mood, and it was at the heart of all heaven. Walking down the halls, she made her way to a special room, the room of the morningstar, Bringer of the dawn. In here was a bed, statues of a beautiful angel who had seven wings, and a picture of Samael who was now Lucifer.

"Leave me Jemmy, I need to be alone." 

"Mistress Dove, are you sure that is wise, you have duties,responsibilities as a member of the godhead."

"Jemmy I will ask again, leave now." Her patience was near its end. She gritted her teeth. It was tested by the Father, and she didn't want to lash out.

Jemmy nodded. He flapped his wings and flew out of her room. 

Dove sat the throne down, and kneeled beside the bed, and slammed her hand on the soft pillow." Why did you have to leave me! You were my friend, was it me?" Dove wept, and everything in her realm turned a sorrowful blue, and water rose from the ground like a facet broke somewhere." I have the power to take you back, I can do it. 

Dove shook her head." No, what are you thinking Dove. You are not him, Father is manipulative, cruel. I am not him." Dove buried her face in the sheet and screamed. Water rose up to her ankles, and her sun kissed feet made it boil, bubbles rose up to the surface. All around her realm was a great flood. Several angels hovered to avoid their clothes from getting wet, and a small cat stood on a floating bed. The head Liberian who looked after the books of creation cast a shield to block out any water, for fear that the flood would consume the library.

Dove summoned a bucket of manna which was a collection of freshly baked loaves of white bread. She grabbed one, and stuffed her face. She needed to forget, forget about the rebellion. Waving her hand, a screen appeared which showed heaven before the rebellion. There Lucifer and Dove were busy planting seeds. However, the laughter and the smiles made everything worse so she placed more of the bread in her mouth, consuming the fluffy substance of paradise.

******

Jemmy flapped his wings as he soared above the flood. It was always like this when Dove was in one of her moods. If only she could see reason and understand that the Son of the Dawn wasn't coming back.

"Oi Jemmy, what has happened? One moment I was painting a wall , and the next moment a wave of water hit me in the face." Jemmy turned his feathered head to the source of the voice. Below him was a wingless angel with a construction hat standing on top of his bed. This angel was a personal creation of Dove and he was the foreman of a crew of angels that maintained the realm. Jemmy never understood why his mistress made them. She could remake this realm at a whim. Their creation seemed redundant.

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"It is the young mistress, she is upset again." Jemmy said, landing on the soft bed.

"Ugh again, you know what not everyone is brave enough to save this but she is overly dramatic. She has one bad day, and this entire realm is underwater, I have work to do, you know. Is there one time when she isn't so dramatic?"

"The Mistress does have her moments. Last time, she locked herself in the workshop of creation and handcrafted stars and civilizations for a couple thousand years. Another time she left with Death on some adventure that she hasn't shared with me." One of the walls caved in and a rush of water came flowing towards the two. Jemmy flapped his wings till he was high in the air. The foreman angel was too slow as he was swept away in the current, along with several curses that came out of his mouth as the flood carried him away. Jemmy summoned a great fish that would swallow him whole, and bring him to a place where the flood didn't reach.

Jemmy flew into the air till he reached the grand library which was shielded off. No no if water entered here, ancient books would be lost. Light engulfed Jemmy as he dived into the water, it boiled as if it was being cooked by a star and evaporated. The entrance of the library needed to be protected.

"Thank you Jemmy, I was afraid that the shield wouldn't hold." Said Yeshua her librarian, who had short black hair full of starlight, and a long white and gold robe. He wore wool socks on his feet, a gift from Dove to make sure he was comfortable. He was no angel, but a spirit from a long dead civilization that Dove personally made. His race met their end at the hands of nanobots, such nasty business that was.

"Don't fear Yeshua, Princess Dove will never allow the grand library to come to harm. May I come in?"

Yeshua nodded a bit frantically." Of course Jemmy, come in come in." The shield faded with a wave, and Jemmy flew into the library. It was an endless hall of knowledge that would drive even lesser Immortals insane. One book has details about the Grandfather, the true God of existence, and another had a book about her mother which was sealed away in a box that no one could touch but her. Jemmy then landed on Yeshua's shoulder." We need to call her. Princess Dove's moods can last for millions of years, and I rather not spend millions of years dealing with water. Yeshua said a bit bluntly.

"Call who, you have to be more specific?" Asked Jemmy, tilting his head to the side.

"You know who, or more specifically they. We need to call Lady Death, or the ruler of the madness islands, the Princess of Chaos, Princess Essi." 

Upon hearing these names, Jemmy frowned." Those two aren't allowed in the Golden City, especially not in the heart of heaven after the last time."

"Let me show you something." Yeshua walked through the endless library till he arrived in front of a wall. He took in a deep breath before phasing through the wall. A long dark stairway appeared before the two and Yeshua resumed walking.

"What in the name of the trinity is this?" Shouted Jemmy, alarmed at the revelation that there was a room that he didn't know. 

Yeshua cringed at the volume of his tone." Shhh I am right here. This is the entrance of the Hall of Friends." Summoning a lantern that burned with holy light, it illuminated not seen before paintings. One was of Death in a gothic dress placing her arm around Dove. Another was Dove and Essi kissing among a orgy of creation and destruction. The last picture is an odd one, even for Jemmy. It was Dove surrounded by the tendrils of Darkness that embraced her.

The Hall of Friends was a small room full of mirrors, each an entrance to a domain of entities older than gods themselves. A mist covered the ground

"Why didn't Dove tell me about this room?" Questioned Jemmy, flapping his wings and hovered in front of one of the mirrors. This mirror belonged to Death who had a large farm full of crops that towered over trees. It has been centuries since he was in the realm of Death, but it changed. Next he flew towards another mirror, but this was of an embodiment of order. No color existed in the realm, like the concept of color was foreign to that plane of existence. The only thing Jemmy saw was a massive eye that surveyed constantly over an empty flat landscape." Ugh creepy."

Jemmy turned to Yeshua who appeared in front of another mirror. He flew and landed on his shoulder. He peered in the mirror and inside the realm of Princess Esshi was a barrage of impossible colors, too much for mortal senses. Water turned to chocolate, and chocolate to feces, and feces to hard candy. Bubbles of all shapes floated in the air, one was the shape of a world being broken apart as its core breaks. Another bubble was an alien tap dancing, and lastly there was a giant bubble in the shape of a mighty dragon who didn't breathe fire. No, he breathed a stream of bubbles that collided with the rest of them.

"By the Father, this realm makes no sense." Jemmy said.

Yeshua blinked before looking away." Yes, the realms of chaos rarely do, yet the ruler of the madness islands has befriended our lady." Yeshua swallowed before resuming looking at that realm of madness. 

"Let's call Death. I would rather Princess Dove be more calm." Jemmy couldn't finish as out of Yeshua's shadow appeared Dove, her radiance filling the room.

"Are you making decisions for me now, Jemmy." Dove said coldly.

Yeshua bowed before the princess and Jemmy followed." Forgive me ,I didn't mean to offend." Jemmy said frantically, more startled than fearful.

"Don't apologize, I am not Father. You have nothing to fear. I am going for a walk with Death,and I won't be back for some time. Jemmy and Yeshua, you are in charge. If any issues arise, I trust you will let me know." Dove was dressed in her white dress with an aura of a rainbow around her head. She was barefoot with golden bracelets around her ankles. Her hair was tied in a ponytail.

"Yes my lady." The two said at the same time.

Dove walked towards the mirror of Death, and placed her hands on it." Death, the end of reality, and the door to the afterlife, I request entrance to your domain." 

"Dove, what happened?" Two pale hands reached out of the mirror at blind speed and pulled her in. With that, Dove, the holy spirit was not in heaven anymore.

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