Yet, Ashleigh’s body reacted with an entirely different thought in mind. The warmth from Caleb’s hand was enough to set her ablaze.
She closed her eyes and turned into his hand, feeling the rough skin of his palm against her soft cheek. A gentle smile spread across his lips.
“I’m here,” he whispered.
‘I’m here with you, Ashleigh.’ Caleb’s voice called out to her from the hated dream. Ashleigh gasped and pulled away from him, drawing her hand to her chest as though she expected to find the knife.
“What’s wrong?” Caleb asked, worried.
Ashleigh didn’t respond, taking another step back from him.
“Why do you run from me?” he asked with disappointment and concern.
“I’m not running,” she insisted.
He took a step forward, and she, a step back. Caleb stopped and looked at her carefully. He didn’t want to push her any further away than she had already pushed herself.
“I’m not going anywhere,” he said simply.
“You are not my mate,” she said flatly, “Granger is.”
Caleb took a deep breath, calming his temper. Even the mention of that bastard’s name was too much to handle.
“I am your mate, as much as he is,” Caleb growled softly.
“No,” she said, shaking her head. “He’s been my mate for two years. We have loved each other, made promises.”
Ashleigh hugged herself as she spoke.
“We have…” Her voice trailed off as the tears fell from her eyes. “…done things.”
Ashleigh sat down on her bed as images of all the times she and Granger had pushed the limits of their physical relationship flowed through her mind. The way he would grab at her, the marks that she would later see in the mirror. She clenched her jaw, trying not to let out the sob that welled in her throat.
‘I made that choice. I told him it was ok….’
Back then, Ashleigh had felt differently about it. She just wanted to make him happy. Granger had been so scared of losing her. She thought that sharing these intimate moments with him would bring them closer.
It wasn’t like she hated it. On the contrary, sometimes, she even enjoyed it. But if she took even a second to honestly reflect, she would remember. Every time she sat alone in her room after Granger had left, she regretted what they had done.
‘It’s too late to regret it now,’ she told herself sadly.
But what happened today… If Caleb had not come, would Granger have forced himself on her? Would she have let him?
‘Does he know that I didn’t fight back?’ she thought to herself, looking towards Caleb with a panic. She tugged harder at the robe, trying to hide her shame.
Caleb observed her carefully. The expressions on her face made it clear her heart was in turmoil. When she tugged at her robe, he wanted to look away, afraid she thought he was staring. But before he could turn away, he saw one of the red marks on her chest, staring back at him, mocking him for being unable to protect her.
He wanted to kill Granger for laying his filthy hands on her. For hurting her. Caleb swallowed down his rage. It wasn’t time for that.
He took a step towards her; she didn’t move away. He took another.
Ashleigh looked up at him as he stood beside her bed. She was fighting the urge to cry, wishing she could tell him to leave. But she was also afraid to lose the warmth she felt when he was near.
Caleb knelt in front of her, keeping his eyes on hers as he moved. He reached his hand up to her cheek once again.
“Even with all that…” he whispered softly, smiling at her tenderly. “I am still your mate,”
“You promised…” she said, her voice cracking, “you promised you would let me go.”
Caleb nodded, still smiling.
“And I would have kept that promise,” he said, “if I thought, even for a moment, that he could make you happier than I can. That he could cherish you.”
Ashleigh closed her eyes, letting the tears she held back fall.
“I would do anything to make you happy, Ashleigh,” Caleb smiled brightly at her, running his thumb gently along her cheekbone.
“You can’t,” she whispered through tears.
“Why?” he asked.
Ashleigh thought of the differences in their packs, their lives. The people they loved and how much they hated each other. Her father, his father, and the questions she still had about what happened between them.
“We aren’t meant for each other,” she answered.
Caleb let out a chuckle. “The Goddess disagrees.”
“Well, she gave me Granger too!” Ashleigh replied, feeling irritated and angry.
“Do you think he can make you happy, Ashleigh?” Caleb’s voice was low. It vibrated against her skin in a way that made her tremble.
“He does,” she lied.
“Liar,” Caleb whispered.
Even knowing it was a lie, it hurt Caleb to hear it. He wanted her to acknowledge him, to accept him.
‘It’s now or never,’ he thought to himself.
Caleb took a deep breath.
“I came back to Winter, intending to leave my feelings buried here. Of seeing you for the last time and never daring to think of you again.”
Ashleigh opened her eyes to find him looking directly at her. He stared at her through tears, with a pain written in his eyes that she recognized, as much as she denied it.
Caleb smiled at her, a lopsided, half-hearted smile. She could see how hard he was trying to keep it up for her.
“As you said, the Goddess gave us both to you,” he whispered, “so it’s your choice. Truly.”
‘What is he saying?’ she asked herself.
“I was willing to step back and let you make that choice without any pressure. I tried to respect your wishes, to let you be. But I can’t do that anymore.”
“What do you mean?” she asked.
“I don’t want to sit around and wait for that day to come anymore,” he said sadly, tipping his head to the side, “The day when you marry him. Completing your bond and severing ours.”
Caleb reached up, placing a hand on either side of her face and holding her gently. He rose to sit on his knees, closer to her now. Their eyes met, both filled with tears and misery.
“Ashleigh,” he began with a smile, “you say he makes you happy. So he, and only he, can be your mate, right?”
Ashleigh swallowed, unable to speak. She nodded.
Caleb pursed his lips and nodded with a sad smile.
“Then it’s simple,” he said.
Fresh tears filled his eyes.
“You’ve always had a choice. If you’re sure that I’m not your mate, all you have to do is make a choice.”
Ashleigh felt a tight grip on her heart, her throat was unexpectedly dry, and her stomach was turning over and over.
Caleb ran his thumbs lightly under her eyes, wiping away the tears, only to be replaced by fresh ones.
“Reject me,” he whispered.
Ashleigh’s heart stopped; her lungs refused to work. Her stomach felt like a lead ball had been dropped inside it. Every part of her was in utter shock.
“Right now, out loud.. An oath to the Goddess, reject me, Ashleigh,” Caleb cried out through anguished tears. “Cut our ties and free us both!”