“She must be proud of you, taking after her.” Galen smiled warmly.
Bell looked away.
“She was the first doctor I trained under,” she smiled. “From the time I was ten, I started going to the clinic with her and training every day. I was performing basic procedures on my own by thirteen.”
“That’s impressive.” Galen grinned slightly as he tried to imagine her at that age.
“It was necessary,” Bell replied quietly.
Galen looked at her carefully, there was something strange in the way she answered.
“Are you ok?” he asked.
Their eyes locked, he saw sadness, pain, and a longing. She saw empathy, protection, and care. Bell turned away from him, standing up.
“I’m fine,” she sighed, “my mom died. Both of my parents, actually, when I was fifteen.”
Bell moved over to the shelf, adjusting the books, fiddling with their order. Keeping herself distracted as she waited for the pity that Galen would no doubt pour on her.
“It’s an unfortunate thing to have in common,” Galen replied softly.
Bell turned to find him standing right behind her. She gasped and backed herself into the bookshelf.
“What?” she asked.
“I lost my mother when I was fourteen, my dad joined her three years later,” his voice was soft, comforting.
He moved closer to her, once more she tried to move back but the bookshelf was in the way.
‘Is he trying to kiss me? Now??’ she wondered to herself, while she did want to kiss him, the moment wasn’t right.
Just as she was about to put a hand up to push him away, he moved first. His warm hands touched her shoulders, ran down the length of her arms, and stopped at her hands, holding them gently.
“You don’t need my apologies, condolences, or pity. They don’t mean anything; they are just words.”
`I hate those words,’ she answered him in her mind. He understood the words people offered to comfort the one that remained. They were bitter, they were empty.
“It’s been a long time since I lost them, but I miss them and it still hurts. I won’t offer you pity, but I do offer my shoulder, my ear, my understanding. I am here for you, whatever you need. There is no expiration on grief.” He squeezed her hands and gave her a reassuring smile.
‘This guy is dangerous,’ she thought to herself as a warmth settled over her heart. Then, a different kind of panic began to grow.
She looked up at him, part of her wanting to wrap her arms around him and kiss him, another part still wishing to push him away.
“I’m going to go and let you have some time to yourself,” he whispered, leaning forward, and kissing her forehead softly. He pulled away from her and walked to the door.
The warmth of his lips lingered on her forehead.
“I’ll come by another time for that tour,” he said, before leaving and shutting the door behind him.
Bell exhaled roughly, as though she had been holding her breath without even realizing it. Her hand reached up to touch her chest, feeling the intense pounding of her heart. With her other hand, she fanned herself, feeling very warm all of a sudden.
‘This fool runs from a game of flirtation, but then leaves me hot and bothered by a kiss to the forehead!’ she laughed at herself. ‘Definitely dangerous.’
Pushing off the bookshelf she walked back to her desk, sitting down she pulled open the drawer. She reached in and grabbed the journal.
“Sorry Mom and Dad, a conversation about your death should not in any way lead to those kinds of feelings…”
Bell turned the book over in her hands, touching the cover gently. She opened it and flipped through the pages. She remembered watching her mother taking notes, writing down experiment results, failures, tips.
She could still remember the way her hair always fell over her eyes when she was focused on taking down her notes.
The old familiar ache in her arm returned, she quickly put the journal back in the drawer, closing it. Bell leaned forward, laying her head on the desk, she stretched her arms down towards the ground letting them hang.
She took deep breaths and tried to relax her body until the ache retreated.
A sound came from the door handle, she sat up quickly with a smile already on her face.
‘Is he back?’ she wondered with too much excitement.
The door opened and Bell was surprised to see not Galen, but Ashleigh.
“Hey lady,” Bell said, cocking her head to the side, it was strange to see her here. “I am such a popular girl today, to what do I owe this surprise?”
“Granger is an idiot,” Ashleigh said, slumping down into the chair Galen had sat in not ten minutes before.
Bell leaned back in her chair.
“Hmmm. Ok, I am going to need more information. I don’t want to walk into one of those traps where I agree with you, but you get mad because I talked trash about your boyfriend. Or where I don’t agree with you, and then you get mad at me for defending him.”
“Say you’ve never done that, I dare you,” Bell replied to the look.
“Fine.” Ashleigh sighed. “Granger was mad—”
“He’s been like that a lot lately,” Bell interrupted, thinking back over the past month.
“Yea,” Ashleigh said, the anger she felt starting to dissipate.
It wasn’t just her he had changed around. Others were seeing it. She couldn’t even explain that it wasn’t his fault, it was hers. They had sworn to keep it secret. She didn’t want to break her word to Granger.
“So, what was it?” Bell asked.
“What?”
“The fight? What was Granger an idiot about?”
“Oh,” Ashleigh said, shaking her head to refocus, “he was mad about the trip to Summer. We got into a fight before we each left, and I never got a chance to tell him I was going. So, he was mad and jealous. Making dumb assumptions about me and them.”
“Them?” Bell asked.
“Summer wolves,” Ashleigh said, keeping the particular wolf to herself.
“Wait, so when you say jealous, you mean like he was thinking you were cheating or something?” Bell asked, leaning forward over the desk.
“Yes,” Ashleigh said. “Then he was just saying stupid stuff without any proof.”
“Like what?”
Ashleigh sighed, looking back to make sure the door was closed she leaned forward keeping her voice low.
“He claims that someone told him there are reports of Summer using Fae magic.”
“Really?” Bell questioned. “That would be insane if it was true. But did he see those reports?”
“Not that I know of.”
“Then he better keep that to himself,” Bell said, shaking her head as she leaned back in her chair. “If Summer as a pack has a fault it’s their insane devotion to their honor. An accusation like that could lead to war.”
“I know, that’s what I said,” Ashleigh replied.
“Oh, Goddess!” Bell suddenly gasped, bringing a hand to her mouth.
“What?” Ashleigh sat forward, concerned.
“I just thought, what if Galen heard him say something like that… that would be…”
Bell trailed off, each of them giving a knowing look. Both women had gotten to know Galen to some degree, and both were aware of his loyalty. If he heard the accusations Granger had made to Ashleigh the night before, it would be his duty to defend his alpha and his pack.
Ashleigh sighed. She didn’t know how to convince Granger that there was nothing to the rumors, or to ease his mind on her choice. Was it even possible to make him understand?
“Ash?” Bell called to her.
“Hmm?” Ashleigh responded absently.
“Are you ok?”
“Yea,” Ashleigh said, “of course.”
“You know you can tell me anything right? Even if it's embarrassing, or it feels wrong, or anything. Don’t hold everything in.” Bell offered.
Ashleigh smiled. “I know, Bell.”
They sat around for another few minutes in comfortable silence with chit chat here and there. They each had something weighing on them, being in each other’s presence, was calming. But soon, Bell needed to return to her patients.
As they left the room, planning to go in opposite directions, Bell had one more thought to share with Ashleigh.
“I told you before, the mate bond isn’t perfect. The Goddess may have her reasons, and maybe the wolf part of us is perfect for each mate, but the mate bond is not infallible. And marking each other, that bond is for life, breaking it can kill you both.”
“What are you trying to say, Bell,” Ashleigh said, her heart picking up.
“I’m not trying to say anything. I am just reminding you, everything in your life is your choice.”
“The mate bond is a blessing from the Goddess,” Ashleigh replied halfheartedly.
“Yeah, but she must have left an out for a reason.” Bell smiled back.
Her smile was always so full of life, it was contagious, irritating even. But the smile on her face at this moment was sad. Ashleigh remembered the night of the sleepover, when they had briefly talked about the mate bond. The sadness she had seen in her eyes, it was this sadness. Bell started to walk away.
“Bell,” Ashleigh called after her, “when are you going to tell me what’s really going on with you?”
Bell looked back at Ashleigh, for just a moment she didn’t hide the sadness, but then the smile came back.
“You first,” Bell replied, with one last genuine smile before walking away.