“You told me to strip!” Mu Ssang complained and pulled his underwear up his legs.
‘No! Am I crazy? I kicked away a jewel that tumbled my way!’
Jin Soon screamed internally but the deluxe willy had already disappeared. Jin Soon reminisced about the genetically improved eggplant growing between rows of peppers. Among tiny green peppers, the big purple eggplant evoked certain lewdness. She greatly missed the purple eggplant that disappeared into his underwear. Her dreamy eyes chased the afterimage.
‘Will it fit? A baby comes out of it. Surely we will be able to adjust to each other.’
Her mouth filled with saliva and her loins burned. The sound of her swallowing her saliva thundered in her head. She flinched at the sound.
‘I must be crazy!’
Jin Soon took a deep breath and blinked her eyes. Her blurry vision came into focus. She wanted to go back in time but if she asked him to whip it out, she would look crazy.
“You are driving me crazy! You did it on purpose.”
She regretted raising her voice. Many feelings like longing, attachment, and regret were mixed into a certain awkwardness. It was the self-consciousness of a virgin.
“What are you even saying? Do you think I am a flasher?” Mu Ssang jumped.
“Hng. Do you remember when you smashed the chamber pot in my house with an iron?”
“You remembered quite a detail. I wanted to know which was stronger, the chamber pot or the iron.”
“When my aunt tried to tell you off, you abruptly exposed your penis. My mother and aunt were taken aback and could not tell you off. Instead, they laughed out loud. You seem to have used that tactic today too.”
“Did I do that? Those were the happy moments.”
Mu Ssang smiled. Those were the happy moments in which their souls were not contaminated. He understood Jin Soon’s sentiments. She must have cared for him a lot that she wanted to check it with her own eyes.
When Mu Ssang opened his arms, Jin Soon was drawn to him like a neodimium magnet. Her massive breasts applied a pleasant pressure on him. Mu Ssang’s penis squirmed at the scent of the body of a healthy young woman.
‘Hers are bigger than Edel’s!’
When Mu Ssang was immersed in the thought of the thieve, Jin Soon’s world was swirling with colors. With her sight disabled, her faculty of touch, smell, and hearing heightened. Two hearts beating like a drum battered their souls.
The intense scent of a male and the familiar scent of her hometown friend rushed to her like water from a broken dike. No other chest in the world could feel as safe and comfortable. Jin Soon, unconsciously caressed Mu Ssang’s back as smooth as ceramics, and muttered.
“Thank God!”
The world, a gray hell a few minutes ago, turned into iridescent heaven in an instant. Jin Soon’s system of perception was simple. If there was Mu Ssang, that place was heaven. If there wasn’t, that place was hell.
“Jin Soon, don’t worry. I don’t even have a scratch. Shall I tell you a cosmic secret?”
“What is it?”
Jin Soon looked up at him.
“I am immortal.”
“What?”
Jin Soon let out a long sigh.
“Why are you sighing?”
“I am scared that you may ascend into heaven in a flash.”
“What are you talking about?”
“The word ‘immortal’ seems ominous. Your skin doesn’t even have pores. It must be a divine body, not a human one. All of your scars have disappeared too.”
Jin Soon, with trembling hands, caressed the scar on the left side of his cheek that was fading. The deep cross-shaped scar that deformed his cheek was fading.
“Even bullets fly past me. Do not worry too much.”
“I am glad but also worried. I want you as a human not as an immortal god.”
Jin Soon’s voice took on a certain sadness. She wished for Mu Ssang to be an ordinary office worker or an owner of a fried chicken joint. Even an owner of a noodle stall would be better than a mercenary.
“Useless words. Teacher is more likely to ascend in a flash, not me. I bought some land in the Bulro District and have begun construction. Have you ever met a god who buys land and builds a house?”
“Land? Really? How wide is it?”
Jinsoon’s eyes widened. It was always Mu Ssang’s dream to have a tile-roofed house with a wide garden and to eat bowls of rice plentifully with beef soup. It was also her wish too. She was happy. Her boyfriend finally decided to settle down. Her prowling mind did not lose a chance.
“It is wider than a soccer field.”
“A soccer field? Are you being metaphorical?”
“No. I bought an entire neighborhood and made an area as wide as a soccer field.”
“Oh my god. Have you laid down the foundation?”
“For sure. The land is almost prepared. Carpenters are preparing lumber according to the schematics.”
Mu Ssang answered without thinking too much.
“What? You only came back to Korea a few days ago. Sure, you would have gone to visit your monk teacher. But in just a few days, you bought many houses, prepared a field as wide as a soccer field, made schematics, and received permission for construction? Are you the president? Are you the king of ghosts?”
Jin Soon’s eyes had a sudden glint.
“…”
Mu Ssang frowned, realizing he was caught in her misleading interrogation. He was just trying to pamper to her but did not know it was too much.
“Tell me honestly. When was it you really came to Korea?”
Mu Ssang saw an illusion of a mistletoe, barely registering what she said.
“One month!”
Mu Ssang closed his eyes firmly and owned up.
“One month…?”
Jin Soon drawled. Mu Ssang closed his eyes firmly. Now he had to endure a flurry of punches from her direction.
“One month? Do you have an explanation for it?”
Jin Soon gave Mu Ssang the stink eye. She was about to inflict a frontal kick and a straight kick.
“Ugh, stupid fellow! To think that someone who cannot eat the treat dangling in front of him is my student…”
A lament was heard from the inside of the sanctum of the mountain. Monk Dae Woo, immersed in a meditative state, slapped the bamboo door and awoke. When his student took out his willy, and they started cuddling and caressing, he expected the “weather” to turn turbulent soon.
But his student ruined it all. His clairvoyance was ruined because of his anticipation. Priest Dae Woo, versed in many things, could not figure out his own student well.
“He did such a good job! Such a good job! He does not know when to conserve his energy and when to spend it! I even sent Kamdoong who was still recovering. Tsk, tsk!”
Priest Dae Woo was feeling impatient. Mu Ssang, apt at handling all matters, did not know much about women. The Buddha said one should sow three seeds in one hole.
Jin Soon was quite fertile soil, so to speak. Only one seed would suffice and thrive. But his stupid student did not even think to till the land, let alone sow any seeds. If he kept snooping on him, the anticipation was going to kill him. At this rate, he was not sure if he will be able to procure an heir before he died.
“If a monk is not able to shave their own hair, they must ask someone else. Should I summon some kind of mythical succubus for him?”
Priest Dae Woo grumbled and wore his rubber shoes and went out of the sanctum.
Something glimmered at the corner of the room. His haughty friend was getting his share of beating from a female human. Kamdoong felt like a resentment of 150,000,000 years was being flushed at once. He loved his friend but it was still fun.
‘Eh?’
The movement of the air was as minuscule as the fluttering of a fly’s wings but it still did not fool the senses of Mu Ssang. Blade-like energy slashed the empty space. The sound of something clashing into another and a scream. Kamdoong, ambushed by a strike of Billion’s Water Armor, was hit in the head without any chance to evade it.
“What is it?”
Jin Soon held a wooden stick and approached the corner of the room. Jin Soon was bold enough to bring water from a source in a deep mountain valley at night where wild beasts roared.
“Hey, you said you urgently needed to regenerate your energy. What are you doing here?”
Mu Ssang scolded him. The corner of the room shimmered. Kamdoong revealed himself. As Sunday Leopard, the human form, he could not let light pass through. He needed to assume his leopard form for that.
From inside the space, a big front paw appeared. A head and a trunk followed. In an empty space, a giant black leopard appeared magically. The black trunk was like a piece taken from darkness itself and a human-like eye with the distinctive white and black pupils shined white.
“It’s a ghost!”
Jin Soon scared, hid behind Mu Ssang’s back. Any human would have been scared.
“There is no need to panic. He is a friend of mine.”
Mu Ssang patted Jin Soon’s shoulder.
“A friend? Oh, my God!”
Jin Soon was dumbstruck. Uncle Samdi was an incredible being by himself but he was still human. To say that a leopard bigger than a tiger was his friend! It was absurd.
“My friend, I am sorry I interfered with your pleasant time. I simply followed Master’s order.”
Kamdoong, reading Mu Ssang’s mood, excused himself. Even the dinosaurs in the underground world become irate if you interfere with them when they mate. He figured he merited some punches for interfering with his friend’s mating process.
Jin soon’s eyes widened. A talking leopard! It was getting even more and more absurd. Can the oral structure of a leopard produce human language?
“Master ordered you?”
“Yes. He told me to tell him if you were going to make offspring.”
‘Ugh. Wretched old man!’
Mu Ssang was appalled by Master’s interference. He was about to shout “Pervert!” but also felt sorry for him. He was already ninety years old. His student-to-be-heir was like this, maybe he was not fit to inherit the temple. He even sent Kamdoong.
“Hey, humans need privacy. It is wrong to snoop on others.”
“I am aware of that. If I don’t obey his order, he suppresses me with a boulder. I have no other choice. I will go now and you shall continue the work that you have been doing.”
“What work? Jin Soon is my sister.”
“Do not lie. The human female is secreting noradrenaline, oxytocin, and estrogen in great amounts. You also produced a lot of oxytocin. This kind of reaction cannot happen between a human brother and sister.”
“Ugh!”
Mu Ssang was appalled further. Jin Soon snuck out her head.
“Mr. Black Leopard is right. My name is Cho Jin Soon, Mu Ssang’s future wife.”
“You are unlike most human women with your clear speech and expression. My leopard form is called Kamdoong and my human form is called Sunday Leopard. Master gave me a name of Gonggong. You can choose any of the three to address me.”
“I will call you Kamdoong. Nice to meet you.”
“I don’t quite understand the feeling of ‘nice’ but it feels nice. I existed for 153,763,225 years but that time was quite meaningless. You do not need to use honorifics.”
Jin Soon, astonished, looked back at Mu Ssang.
“Kamdoong is right. He is very old.”
“Oh, my!”
Jin Soon was awestruck. She became aware of the fact that Mu Ssang lived in a different world. Kamdoong held out his paw as if to shake hands.
“Jin Soon. I like the name. My friend’s wife is my friend.”
“She is not my wife. She is my sister!”
Mu Ssang clamored but Kamdoong did not listen. Jin Soon grabbed his giant paw. At that moment, a line of blood shot from Jin Soon’s wrist. The blood evaporated and went into Kamdoong’s nostrils. Before Jin Soon had time to be startled, her bleeding stopped and the wound healed.
Jin Soon, dumbstruck, looked at Mu Ssang. Mu Ssang smiled and nodded.
“He seems to like you. You got lucky today.”
Jin Soon could not understand what he meant. As she was about to open her mouth to ask, Kamdoong’s body faded.
“Master, no, Teacher is calling me. Mu Ssang, Master said that a man who brings tears to a woman’s eyes is not a man.”
“Kamdoong, I like you a lot. If we meet next time, I will cook you a nice meal.”
Jin Soon waved. Jin Soon’s ability to adapt was unmatched. Kamdoong’s eyes showed a faint emotion.
“I cannot absorb biomatter directly but I am grateful, Jin Soon. Human emotions change so quickly and abruptly. Before I met your husband-to-be, I spent so many years in darkness. It was because I had no ego. A being with ego can forge their own destiny.”
Leaving mysterious words, Kamdoong disappeared into the thin air. He had appeared like a ghost and disappeared like a ghost. Jin Soon stared at the empty space. Sang Cheol had referred to Samdi as a ghost but Kamdoong was the real ghost.
If it were a common person, their eyes would have gone all white and they would have fainted, but Jin Soon adjusted to it quickly. Indeed, Jin Soon had quite a resolve.
“He is gone!”
Mu Ssang muttered mindlessly.
“Mu Ssang!”
Jin Soon yelled.
“What?”
“What? Is this something that can be explained with a ‘what’?”
“The world has an invisible part. You do not need to be aware of the world I live in.”
“What do you mean with ‘I got lucky’? Why did he take my blood?”
“Kamdoong can communicate telepathically and teleport. He took your blood because he needed some medium for the connection of psychotic waves. When you run into some ordeal, call upon him by focusing your mind. I don’t know the exact range but Kamdoong will help you.”
“That can’t be! So you are saying that he will come to save me like superman when I am in some kind of danger.”
“Yes.”
“Is he stronger than you?”
“He may be a close match to me.”
“Really? Whoa!”
Jin Soon clapped and jumped joyously. If someone as powerful as Mu Ssang could protect her, she did not need to fear anything in the world anymore. She liked her new bodyguard but the joy of finally joining Mu Ssang’s world was greater.
“What did he mean by ‘change the rule of the game?'”
Jin Soon muttered. Kamdoong’s words swarmed in her head. Something flashed in her head.
“I will go for a walk for a while. The outhouse of the neighboring house is empty.”
Jin Soon opened the door and went out of the room.. Mu Ssang was confused.