Chapter 1: The Offer

''WELCOME, SOUL OF DANTE!''

Was his name Dante? He didn't bother to remember, the only thing he remembered was a loud bang, then dead. Simple enough, nothing to talk about.

''Your name is now Dante!''

Cool

''YOU HAVE BEEN CHOSEN, DANTE! TO TRAVEL THE MULTIVERSE WITH A SYSTEM, FOR THE AMUSEMENT OF MYSELF, A GOD!''

A god they said, meaning there was more than one... What the fucks is a system?

''A system is a... Mm, I've never had to explain it, usually, people just know... Fuck.''

''TAKE THIS!"

Suddenly, he knew a lot more than he wanted to, a lot about these so-called 'Systems'. If he had a head it would be positively throbbing.

''Heh... throbbing.''

''BEHOLD YOUR SYSTEM!''

Suddenly, a screen appeared within his view, it wasn't exactly fancy, but what it did have was the simple words of 

M.I.L.F.S IOS V 0.5

Milfs? Now that's a word he remembered... Was his job to hunt milfs?

''YESS! I mean... Ahem... Your job is to travel the multiverse, hunt Milfs, make milfs, fuck milfs, care for milfs, to create a massive following of milfs!'' Near the end, whoever this god was sounded near breathless, it was a woman's voice at that.

There were a few moments of silence before the God spoke

''So?''

Oh? Was that it? So all I've got to do is... Make, Bang, and care for milfs?

''YES!'' Another statement with far too much excitement... Another cough to clear the air.

Well, sure. Not like I'm going to turn down a life of Milf hunting.

''THANK YOU!''

Suddenly, he was blasted with knowledge, his appearance, his abilities, and where he would be heading first. A world called 'Naruto'

Revolved around Ninja, and whole countries full of them, something like that.

His name was Dante because that is who he would 'become' Dante, a Demon Slayer, the 'Strongest Demon Slayer'

He also had an Alias, another name to go by if he ever wanted to. ''Anthony Redgrave.'' mostly going by Tony.

Despite the many abilities available to the man, he would have none of his gear, only his body for the beginning, and only would him laying, playing, making, or caring for milfs would make him stronger, as well as unlock more of his talents.

As he began to disappear, all the knowledge he needed crammed into his head he began to vanish, before he vanished entirely.

''There goes my Milf Paladin, TAKE THAT ASSHOLE! I KNEW I'D GET ONE FIRST!''

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Suddenly, he was surrounded by death and chaos. Massive flames and jutsu flew around him in a storm, someone seemed to notice him and without thinking moved to attack him, raising a hand. Like plucking a flower he suddenly grabbed the man by the throat in a strong grip, lifting him off the ground easily as he stared at him. He took note of the forehead protector and clothes of the person. ''Look, man... I mean all the best, but if you attack me first, that will decide whose side I'm on.''

When he had to slap a kunai out of the man's hand he nodded, before he punched the man directly in the stomach, blood rushing out of his mouth and spraying Dante.

''Oh god, it's already happened.'' Dante through the man aside, sure that in the middle of a battle that man wouldn't get healed he began to look around, noting each side as they fought he suddenly grabbed another person wearing different colors.

''Which village do you fight for?''

''KONOHA!'' The boy screamed at him with pride before he took off, not even questioning the random man grabbing him.

Dante grinned before he spread out his arms, his voice suddenly thundered outwards across the field. ''FOR KONOHA!''

He then kicked off the ground and sped forward, only to catch a flaming fireball directly to the chest that quickly consumed him, only to appear on the other side as the flying superman punched the non-Konoha guy directly in the face.

His feet slipped out from beneath him and he did a cartwheel before his head slammed back into the ground.

Dante began to cross the battlefield, helping out the people who seemed to be struggling, punching those who needed a good thrashing.

The rain didn't stop around them, only slightly annoying as it appears that he wasn't given clothing when he 'appeared'.

Yes, he was fighting naked. But, aren't we all fighting naked on the inside?

Seeing a large battle take place further in the distance he ran towards it. When he noticed who was fighting, his eyes laid on a beautiful blonde woman, and the gods had blessed him because by the headband she was also from Konoha.

Dante jumped from the ground, seeming to blur across the field before he appeared to land a solid hit to the gut of the man the three of them fought.

He put a lot of strength behind it but he noticed a difference between the ones he had fought before. That didn't stop him however as he pushed further and threw the man across the field towards the tree's suddenly.

Jiraiya roared as he saw the man. ''HE'S FIGHTING NAKED?!''

Orochimaru chuckled softly, shaking her head. ''Better yet... He just punched Hanzo and threw him... Did anyone else see him get here, or did it feel like he simply... Appeared?''

''Bingo my fine new friend, the name's Dante.''

Tsunade suddenly stepped forward, her face serious as she put her hands on Dante's shoulders. ''Are you on Konoha's side?''

''Yeap, hired Merc.'' Dante stated without batting an eye, a few looks of confusion passed between others close enough to hear it, but then the tight Tsunade had on him hardened. ''Can you push Hanzo further back? We need to get him away from the battlefield.''

''For a kiss? I'll push him into the sea.''

Tsunade didn't even hesitate, kissing Dante's cheek. ''Just another few hundred meters, we'll join you... Right after I heal these two idiots.''

Jiraiya watched, gobsmacked. Tsunade just kissed another man without hesitation... What was going on, was this all a really bad dream?

Dante winked to Tsunade before he turned, running forward again as he traveled his form began to blur once more, Orochimaru's gaze locking onto the man's bare back. ''He's fast... Really fast, but I don't sense any chakra.''

''We don't have time, both of you come here! Hanzo's poison has already started to affect you two... I'm hoping the guy can last long enough against the poison.''

Both Orochimaru and Jiraiya made their way to her, letting her begin to heal them. Orochimaru was... Interested in the new appearance, never having heard anything about a hired mercenary... Especially not one strong enough to push back Hanzo the Salamander.

Jiraiya was lost, confused about the turn of events. The three of them had been struggling against the man... Then a naked guy appeared, got a solid hit in and threw him away, then got a kiss from Tsunade like it was just that easy?

Tsunade was worried, she bet everything on a single man, despite her always having shit luck, she was praying to everything she could this would be the one time it was fine... She had already used a lot of her life force to keep these two healthy, and it was only getting worse... Those who were affected by it beside them didn't have a chance, the bodies that had piled up were already too high.

 

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