Chapter 66: Ch. 65 – What If We All Punched at the Same Time?

The birds kneeled, heads down, with their handcuffed wrists raised towards Momo.

“This feels weird,” Momo mumbled. “The bowing is a bit much.”

“We’re not bowing, we’re protecting ourselves. In case your weird black magic goes awry, I’d rather only be missing hands, not my head, too,” the goth bird explained, an eyebrow raised. Momo gulped.

She didn’t plan on beheading anyone today.

Momo took the paintbrush and doused each of their handcuffs with Nether.

“I’ll start with yours,” Momo said, eyes narrowed in focus. “Now stay still.”

Momo focused her mind once more. Okay brain, do the thing again. Sensing the Nether’s faint hum, Momo tapped into it. Like igniting a car engine, as soon as she could feel it – she felt everything. She could operate the Nether like a finely tuned metal machine, her mind’s eye cranking levers and spinning gears.

Now, if I could just make it act like a key…

The Nether began to solidify, gripping tighter to the surface of the handcuffs. As she strained her mana, she forced the Nether to shrink. It slithered into the keyhole of the handcuffs, and then Momo let it expand. If she could make it mimic the shape of the key, and then turn it…

A faint click sounded, and the handcuffs fell to the floor.

The bird raised his head, eyes wide with surprise.

“You actually did it,” he mumbled, completely shocked.

“Me next! Me next!” the bird to his right commanded. Momo laughed. The other one was younger, and considerably more excitable. The goth bird sighed, and got out of the way so Momo could proceed with his colleagues.

After the handcuffs were taken care of, the bird thieves shook their feathers, and faced Momo.

“Thank you,” the bird with the bangs said, doing his best attempt at gratitude. It didn’t suit him very well. “Now that we can properly shake talons, I suppose we should introduce ourselves. I’m Corv. I specialize in pickpocketing and ranged attacks. This is Salvo, our [Materialmancer]” he gestured to the younger, brighter one, “and this is Geff. He likes hitting things.”

Geff grunted. He was a bird of few words.

“I’m Momo. Nice to meet you,” Momo said, limply shaking his hand. She tried to avoid getting impaled by any of his extremely long fingernails. “Now, can you all take care of the rest of the cages? All this Nether-bending drained the hell out of my mana. And I assume you have some sort of lockpicking skills…”

“Sure do,” Salvo grinned. “Unless the locks on these cages are magically sealed…”

A loud, guttural noise turned all of their heads in the other direction. Several locks clattered on the floor, thieves rejoicing as they escaped their cells. Geff hadn’t stayed along to strategize, instead making quick work of the cages. He held two bars with his bare hands.

“I guess that answers my question,” Salvo muttered. “Slow down, Geff, you always get to do the fun part!”

Salvo raced after the bigger bird, the pair of them joining forces to combine dexterous skill and brute strength to empty the cages. As they did, the prisoners assembled in huddles. While they seemed briefly placated by making it out of the cells, Momo knew it’d only be a little while longer before they started darting out of the place. Momo would have to act fast.

The only way they were going to make it past Sera’s defenses was if they came at her in overwhelming numbers. Some of them would undoubtedly be re-captured, but if she played it right, Momo could manage to slip away during the chaos…

She frowned. Who did she think she was? She'd never just 'slip away' while someone else was getting turned into Sera's new flower vase. She’d be haunted with a guilty conscience forever if one of those silly birds caught a stray [Abysmal] bullet.

But it isn’t like their chances are much better rotting away in here, Momo thought.

She sighed. They’d have to do something. She’d have to do something.

“Can I have everyone’s attention?” Momo said, using her outdoor voice.

No one turned to look at her. In the cacophony of competing voices, Momo’s was barely a gust of wind. Her [Burgeoning Confidence] had certainly helped her hold a conversation with a few people without wanting to cry, but there was no way she was ready to command an army of criminals. That was some Valerica type stuff.

She’d need to outsource this [Army General] requirement, and fast.

She looked over towards her personal legion – five wolves and an unseen cat. Hm. She couldn’t imagine any of them giving a rousing speech. Maybe if someone could translate meows into battle cries… Ugh. Momo didn’t have the time to develop that sort of technology. She surveyed the room, already seeing a few groups of criminals pointing towards the exit.

She looked upwards, back towards Vivienne’s platform. That’s when something caught her attention. The light in the room – it originated from a stained-glass window sitting just above that platform. Remembering the architectural plans that Nia showed them, that window had to face the south, the opposite side of the building to the Knight’s Quarters.

There were no exits on that side of the building. And if there were no exits, then there would be no reason to post guards there…

Momo had an idea.

“Mr. Corv,” Momo cleared her throat. The bird remained by her side, apparently uninterested in joining his two companions on their chaotic quest to pry open the cages. “Do your wings work? Or are they just for show?”

He scowled at her. “What kind of question is that? Of course they work.”

“Sorry,” Momo turned red. “I’m new to all this.”

“To manners?”

“To bird manners,” Momo sighed. “Look, I need a way to get everyone’s attention, and my voice doesn’t exactly reach a level above ‘moderately quiet’. Do you think you could fly up and make an announcement?”

He considered it, and then rolled his eyes.

“Fine. I can use my [Call].”

Momo didn’t dare ask what that was – at risk of appearing even more rude.

“Okay – yeah, sure, do that. Tell everyone that if we can break that window up on Vivienne’s platform, we could escape out that way. Pol left the ladder there, so it’ll be an easy climb up. It’s probably a bit of a long way down, but anything is better than running straight into Sera’s lap. Plus, half of you have wings.”

He hummed, emitting a gurgling sound from deep in his throat. Momo took that as the bird version of a nod. Within seconds, he was shooting upwards. Momo gaped, staring in awe as he glided effortlessly above the crowds.

It dawned on her that she had never seen any of the bird halflings fly. Watching Corv swim through the air like it was nothing made her immediately jealous. Why couldn’t Valerica have given her wings? She was entirely sure the Necromage knew how. It was just one of those things that Valerica would say. Like, ‘oh, did I forget to give you your cool raven wings? My bad!’

Momo grumbled. It would have made deliveries so much easier.

She was internally assembling a list of complaints for when she returned to Brulane. She was confident that she would share approximately zero of them outloud.

Once Corv was sufficiently high above the rest, he opened his beak and let out an alarm bell of a sound. It was a sharp, staccato cry that accomplished exactly what Momo wanted – every single face turned to him, many with hands over their ears.

“The painter girl who freed us carries a message. Apparently, the woman who the metalheads intended to trade us for has become free. If the girl is correct, this woman, an Excalibur necromancer, has ousted the King’s regime, and overtaken the government. She tells us that if we leave the way we came, there is a chance we could be killed on sight.”

Fear once again took hold of the room. The low chatter turned to a high pitch, each clique of criminals looking more desperate to leave. With a groan, Corv let out his [Call] again, at an even higher frequency this time. Momo felt her eardrums bleed a little.

“She says our best bet is to leave through that window,” he pointed a talon towards it. “The knights conveniently left a ladder for us to climb, so let’s single-file out of this Netherhole. I suggest we do this quietly, so we don’t attract any unneeded attention.”

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The room calmed down once again, relief washing over them. The crowds immediately started walking chaotically – but quietly – towards the ladder, not leaving a second to chance. Momo ran after them, not wanting to be the last one to escape. She was sure that one of Sera’s lackeys would catch on pretty quickly, and Momo wanted this to be her last prison break of the month.

—

To absolutely no one’s surprise but her own, Momo was the last person to make it up to the platform.

Every type of rat, snake, and thieving bird shoved their way in front of her. Apparently, her quick tour of admiration and respect ended as soon as the criminals were free to do what they pleased.

By the time she had joined the rest, they were already busy throwing everything they had at the window. It was surprisingly resistant – and definitely not made of regular glass. It seemed to be doing more damage to the criminals than they were doing to it.

Geff looked down sadly at his talons, which were inflamed red.

“Window hurt my fist,” he grumbled.

Salvo gave him a protective pat on the shoulder. Her expression of pity quickly turned to anger, eyeing the window as if it had attacked Geff and not the other way around.

“You think you can knock about my brother, huh, window?” she squawked at the inanimate thing. She raked her talons across it, testing the material. Despite the intense pressure she put on it, it didn’t crack – not even the streak of her claws left a mark.

She turned to Momo.

“It’s made of magically-refined sandstone,” she told her. “It’s an incredibly durable physical material, resistant to both physical attacks and to most elemental magics. It would take an [Expert] level attack to saw through it.”

Momo huffed. None of the captured criminals seemed any stronger than an [Intermediate], and Momo supposed that was on purpose. Lower level criminals were good to have around if you needed mindless servants, not would-be revolutionaries and escape artists.

She racked her brain.

“What if we all just… hit it at once?”

The criminals turned to her with stupefied expressions on their faces.

Momo turned red as a tomato. Sure, it wasn’t Einstein levels of smart, but it was the best she could come up with.

“I mean, have you tried that?” Momo squeaked. “You all just seem to be hitting it randomly. No offense! That’s a great strategy. But… maybe if we just took one huge, big sling at it…”

They just blinked at her, expressions unmoving.

“All punch at once,” Geff nodded, shaking out his talons. “I like.”

“From my understanding of the material, an overwhelming blunt force attack might just work. But the key would be to hit it in succession, at the same place,” Salvo said, thinking aloud. She drew her finger over the glass, highlighting what she believed was the weakest section. “So if everyone lined up, punched their best punch at the weak point, and then let the next person give it their go, then we might be in business.”

“Yeah, that’s exactly what I meant,” Momo said, laughing nervously. “Let’s do that.”

Geff was the first in line.

This time, Momo didn’t mind waiting her turn. She queued in the back as she watched the criminals charge up their attacks. Several bandaged their fists, others took out handaxes. The sharp tools were put aside, daggers stowed in exchange for gauntlets. If this had been a collection of knights, the glass would have cracked in no time.

But this was a bunch of light footed thieves, whose individual physical strength was akin to a gang of mice. Even so, if the mice targeted their attacks just so…

“I heard a crack!” Salvo cheered, just as another fist smashed into the hardened glass. Salvo had posted herself by the front, her finely tuned eyes and ears keeping an eye on the window’s stability.

“[Pinning Blow]” one thief screamed, rocketing a magic-tipped arrow at the wall. It bounced off like a boomerang, soaring overhead. The crowd booed.

“Next! Come on, blunt attacks only!” Salvo yelled.

Momo laughed. Salvo was really getting into this.

Thief after thief landed their blow, and the cracks started spreading like tree roots. Luckily, the Banquet Hall's walls were well-insulated, so none of the cheers and boos seemed to escape back to Sera’s domain.

The slivers of broken glass only grew deeper as the minutes went on, but the criminals were growing exhausted. They were taking turns in rapid succession, barely taking a moment to breathe before getting back in line for another go.

“Come on, Momo – let that vile window have it!”

Salvo’s green, passionate eyes bored into hers as she reached the front of the line. She had been so busy tracking the progress of the crack that she had failed to notice that she had made it back in front. She had let Dusk get the first few swipes, trusting that the cat’s muscle was probably greater than her own.

But maybe...

“Wait, you said it resisted elemental magics, right? Does Nether count?”

“Nether?” Salvo’s eyebrows rose. “I don’t know.”

Momo gritted her teeth. There was a good chance [Abysmal Blast] would either tear right through the glass, or bounce back and tear right through a few criminals. She put her fists together.

“Everyone, get to the sides!” she shouted.

Or at least she thought she shouted. Her voice was still not loud enough to interrupt the normal volume of conversation, and she sighed.

“Salvo, can you tell everyone to –”

“Everyone get to the sides!” Salvo roared, an unprecedented volume coming out of her shallow beak. The criminals quickly and fearfully obliged, rocketing to the sidelines as Momo inhaled.

If I use my new cultivation ability to supercharge the Abysmal Blast…

She had no idea if that would work, but she had learned one thing about life in Alois – it was best to improvise.

“[Abysmal Blast II]!”

 

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A shoutout to my author friend Enigma, for his new story on SH: Born for the Apocalypse: A Dao Apocalypse LITRPG

https://www.scribblehub.com/series/679749/born-for-the-apocalypse-a-dao-apocalypse-litrpg/

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