Chapter 34: Chapter 30: Bonny’s Armor and Rules of the Game

I felt like it’d been days since I’d heard from Etherea, and as I stepped inside of Bonny’s dwelling, I understood why. The luscious Elven maiden’s hands emanated glowing energy that seemed to pulse out of her in waves, distorting the air around her as sweat spilled from her brow and her teeth clenched and ground against each other.

I said nothing at first, just watching the two women at work. Bonny raised her head to acknowledge me with a cute, slightly buck-toothed grin as I walked through the door with Sprinkle leaning against my shoulder.

“Mr. Drake!” Bonny said, holding the breastplate in place as it seemed to shudder and quake on the worktable as though it were resisting Etherea’s enchantments. “We’re almost done here, just have a seat.”

I obeyed without a word, sitting on the one stool by the door, and Rainbow Sprinkle quickly helped herself to my lap. I tried not to get a chub as I smelled her sweet cotton candy musk and felt her wriggle her butt against my crotch in an innocent attempt to make herself comfortable.

After several more minutes of Etherea grunting and sweating as magical energy spilled out from her blue palms, she finally collapsed backward onto another bench, panting like a dog at the beach. “Hero,” she grinned at me. “You came just in time.”

“How did you know we were finishing up here?” Bonny asked as she inspected the shimmering piece of armor for flaws.

I shook my head. “I was just looking for Sprinkle,” I said. “I noted she was gone and so I went out looking for her while I was touring the town with Aldon.”

“Aldon?” Etherea perked up. “Who’s that?”

“Another Apex Hero,” I said. “He landed just last night. I’m sure you’ll meet him later.”

“Interesting,” she said, a bit of mischief in her eyes. “If they’re all like you, I’d be thrilled to make his acquaintance.”

“I met him,” Bonny said without looking up. “Don’t get your hopes up.”

I cocked my head sideways. “Why does everyone react so differently to him at a glance? He seems like a fantastic guy to me,” I remarked, genuinely perplexed.

Bonny shrugged and sighed. “I’m sure he is,” she said. “Your sister-in-law seems to adore him, at least.”

I blushed to have her essentially call Autumn my wife by proxy, but I didn’t acknowledge it. I figured that’s more or less how they viewed the relationship an Apex Hero had with his catgirl, and it made a kind of sense to me.

“So why the lukewarm reaction from my girls and you?” I pressed further.

She shrugged. “Different girls’ cores prioritize different things in their mates. I’d say the majority long for a sweet guy with unlimited reserves of affection and devotion, like me, and I think that’s why most of our ovaries get so inflamed around you.”

What a vulgar way to put it. “And Aldon doesn’t represent that to you?” I asked.

“He’s just not our type,” Bonny answered, her nose twitching as she inspected the last detail of the breastplate. She lifted it up suddenly for my inspection. “Here, look at this,” she said.

The breastplate's design was simple but elegant--a polished silver-looking chest piece, slightly convex on the outside but curved to accommodate the shape of my chest within. It had been engraved with an elaborate pattern of interlocking hexagons, some filled in with unfamiliar runes that glowed with the energy of Etherea's magic, others left empty for contrast or, perhaps, future expansion. It looked pretty badass, if slightly over-designed.

“And Vale’s working on a cloak for you that’ll have additional enchantments,” Etherea said. “Just as soon as I recover from these.”

I looked upon their handiwork in awe. “Thank you so much,” I gushed, unable to believe it. “What enchantments does it have?”

Etherea and Bonny exchanged a nervous look as Sprinkle started giggling madly. “Well, it contains the base enchantments you’d expect of any magical armor,” the moon elf started. “Namely it gives your body a stoneskin-like quality, making it resilient to the elements and physical damage.”

“My whole body?” This would nullify my need to get barkskin from Ivy, which was awesome. I wouldn't have to spend any points on protection.

“Your whole body,” she repeated, nodding, “But the effect originates from the chestpiece, so its potency is diminished in extremities further removed from it--”

“Mainly your feet,” Bonny said.

“Right,” Etherea nodded. “Your feet are still slightly more vulnerable. I should caution you, though, this doesn’t make you impossible to injure. It just makes it much, much harder.” She grinned proudly at that. "Only the blow of a general or a queen would likely be strong enough to break it outright."

I grinned right back. “Fucking incredible,” I said. “I had no idea you were capable of this!”

“Many moon elves have the ability to enchant items,” Bonny said. “And we've been hoarding the ingredients for these things for a while. I wouldn’t expect you to know about this, but now you do. Keep it in mind next time you need some equipment made! We still have a few tricks up our sleeve.” She giggled proudly.

However, Etherea sighed. “But give me some time, please. These rush jobs are killing me.”

I apologized profusely, but she wouldn’t have any of it. I tried on the armor and immediately felt the power coursing through my body. What a fucking rush it was.

“Any other enchantments I should be aware of?” I said, looking back at Sprinkle as she chortled and snorted with suspicious self-satisfaction.

“Umm,” Etherea said, looking at Bonny and then back at me. “Yes. Sprinkle added her own enchantment--with my help, of course. She couldn’t do it on her own, but she harnessed her own spirit and her connection to you to invent a charm I’ve never seen before. It really is impressive, first of all. Let me start with something positive.”

I eyed her worriedly. “What do you mean by that?”

“Well,” she smirked, “It sort of--Sprinkle honey, forgive me, but it sort of feels like it’s more for you than Bucky.”

She frowned. “What do you mean? He will love it!”

“What does it do?” I asked.

Bonny winced, but she was the one to finally offer the full truth. “When you pierce or slash an enemy with a weapon while wearing this armor, it triggers a far greater loss of blood than what would be normally possible. It’s a... blood spray enchantment.”

I groaned. “Why am I not surprised?”

Sprinkle suddenly looked like she might cry as she studied my expression. “My Bucky?? Did I do something bad?”

I sighed, smiling weakly at her. “No, sweetheart, it’s fine. Is there a way I can turn it off, though, when I don’t want to murder someone by accident?”

Etherea answered. “Just cover up the rune shaped vaguely like a drop of blood in the hex underneath your ribs on your right side. Smear it with something, like mud, and that ought to do it.”

“It’s that easy to remove a charm?” I asked.

“It’s temporary, and only you can do it,” Etherea nodded, “But yes. Once it’s cleaned off, though, it’ll be activated once more.”

I beamed at Sprinkle. “Well, there you go, then, babe. No harm no foul.”

She grinned. “My Bucky! I knew you’d love it!” She jumped into my arms, and I caught her and kissed her deeply, dodging her horn.

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“Does she have any idea how lucky she is?” Etherea groaned jealously.

Bonny giggled musically, her bunny ears going lopsided as she considered the question. “I think she knows exactly how lucky she is, by the look of things.”

I started toward the door with Sprinkle cradled in my arms, but then I pivoted at the last minute as I remembered something. “Oh!” I said. “Daisy asked me to take you to the forest with me today. Something about a game?”

Bonny’s eyes went wide. “How much did she tell you?”

“Not much,” I shrugged. “Sounds pretty fuckin’ sus, though, I’m not gonna lie.”

“It’s perfectly innocent. Just playful fun,” she insisted through a wide buck-toothed grin. “I’ll meet you at the cabin in thirty minutes. I just need to clean up around here.”

Sprinkle frowned. “I cannot go with you today,” she pouted.

“Why?” I asked, suddenly shocked. She had the battle armor and gauntlets and everything, and despite my lingering trepidation, I was actually kind of excited to see her go buck wild on an ogre or something with those badass claws.

“I promised Daisy I would play with Gumi. She says she needs a break from the slime girl.”

I nodded defeatedly. “True,” I agreed. “Gumi can be quite possessive of Daisy. But you’d better come with me next time.”

She squealed with joy at being invited. “I will, my Bucky! I promise!”

My high spirits were jolted out of me when I suddenly locked eyes with the elfmaid across the room and realized there was something I needed to do. "One more thing, though," I said as I pecked her cheek and set her back on the ground. "Etherea, can I speak with you for a moment?"

Her eyes went glowy and wide as she nodded. "Privately?" she asked.

"Kinda of," I said, and I escorted her outside while Sprinkle and Bonny waited, staring at each other awkwardly, no doubt.

"Don't be long, my Bucky!"

I looked at Etherea, then scanned the neighborhood. Aldon was chatting up Scalia as she swept her doorstep by the inn. They were getting along well enough by the looks of things, which was a relief. Aside from that, no one was around, but I still instinctively kept my voice low. "Did Ivy ever mention the possibility of a spy to you?"

Etherea nodded. "Of course," she said. "But I've been investigating very carefully, looking for any signs of suspicious activity. I found nothing. Granted it hasn't been long at all," she admitted. "Why do you ask? Do you have news?"

"Sort of," I said. "I spoke with Darkmaw last night. I'll be calling a meeting about that soon. But suffice it to say, we do have a pair of leaky lips in town, though I'm not sure that the word 'spy' signals the right intent."

She clenched her jaw and furrowed her brow. Even then, she was gorgeous. "What does that mean, hero? I'm not following."

"It means just keep listening. And let people know I'm planning a meeting soon. About Darkmaw. Maybe that'll make the spy do something noticeable, I don't know," I shrugged. "Thanks, Etherea."

"Not at all, hero. I hope we have a chance for a... private meeting sometime soon," she winked, even despite the gravity of our conversation. Incorrigible woman.

Sprinkle and I headed back to the cabin. It was a pretty normal day, everyone chipping in and doing their chores. Gumi appeared to be in a mood, completely engulfing Daisy's legs, making it hard for her to stand back up as the poor holstaur counted bottles of milk.

It was more like forty-five minutes before I saw Bonny again, but she did eventually show up outside the cabin door, and I slid it open, wearing my breastplate and wielding my lance, as I beamed at the bunny girl.

“Looking pretty sharp with all the high-level gear, Mr. Drake,” she winked. “You must have an amazing blacksmith.”

“A shockingly sexy one, too,” I grinned. “Come on, let’s get to work.”

We walked to the edge of the woods together, and I could practically feel Daisy’s gaze on our backs.

“So,” I started, looking around for any traps or surprises as we entered the forest. Given all this anticipation about the so-called game, I half expected something like a surprise party at this point. "Tell me what's going on?"

She giggled. “It’s really very simple, Mr. Drake. Every day when we go into the forest together, we’ll kill as many monsters as we can. The winner is the one who lands the most killing blows.”

“That’s it?” I asked, kind of disappointed all of a sudden. “That’s hardly the earth-shattering reveal I was expecting.”

“There’s more,” she said, her ears and cottontail twitching excitedly as she pressed on. “This part was Daisy’s idea.”

“Oh. Here we go,” I said, swallowing hard with brimming trepidation.

She laughed at me and grabbed me by my wrist, stopping me to face me and explain things clearly. “Don’t be so nervous. It’s really straightforward. At the end of every day in the forest together, we have sex. The winner is on top, setting the pace. The catch is this: I’m very fertile, and if I can get you to finish inside of me, I’ll almost certainly be pregnant, and the breeding program will have to begin based on the promise you made to Daisy.”

I groaned. Now it all made sense. That fucking stupid promise I made. Still, I couldn’t even be mad. I was actually a little proud of my holstaur for her craftiness.

“But there’s one thing she didn’t count on,” I chuckled.

“What’s that?”

“I could just refuse to play,” I pointed out. “What’s stopping me?”

“Daisy said you would say that, and she told me to tell you that if you love her, you would agree to the terms.”

My face sank, but then I laughed. “Ah,” I said. “So it’s emotional blackmail, then. Nice.”

She grinned back at me, her stupidly sexy buck-toothed bunny grin lighting up her face as her nose twitched and the breeze flapped at her loincloth enticingly. She was just waiting for the inevitable.

“Alright,” I said. “Fuck it. Sure. But no leg-locking me in!”

What difference did it even make? As long as she didn’t cheat I was sure I could just pull out at the last second. It wasn’t a one hundred percent safe method of contraception, but it never failed me before.

“Excellent! Oh, yes yes yes, Mr. Drake! Oh, we’re going to have so much fun!” Bonny said, hopping and clapping.

“I’m going to kick your ass in this so-called game,” I said, fully accepting the challenge. “Get ready to go raw.”

“I’m counting on it, Mr. Drake,” she grinned. “Now, let’s find some monsters to kill!”

She disappeared into the shrubbery in an instant, a competitive glint in her eye and a spring in her step that I’d never seen before.

It was at that moment that I knew I was fucked.

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