Chapter 3: Chapter 2: Nightmare

Susan ends up leaving not long after I agree with her. She said it was getting late and wanted to meet someone. Perhaps it is her boyfriend. Soon after she leaves, I get a call from Kyle after an hour or so.

“Hey man, how are you?” I ask him. There’s an awkward, looming silence over the phone call.

After what feels like an eternity, he finally starts speaking.

“Is she still with you?” Kyle asks me.

“No, she left not long ago.”

“Oh, what did she say? Anything important?” His tone is more nervous than before, don’t tell me he is still rearing to go for her even now.

“Sorry to break the news to you buddy, but the girl has a boyfriend. Your chances looking kinda slim here.” What ends up coming back through the other end is not a voice of frustration or anger, but a sigh of relief.

“Good, that’s good,” Kyle says as if it appeases him.

“Why the hell is that good? Don’t you care about who the school idol is dating?” I ask that question. I am letting my frustration get the better of me. Still, I refer to her as the idol since I didn’t want to expose my earlier relationships with her.

“The girl sounds like bad news to me. Call it intuition, but I know my women very well. Mike, this is not something you can just deal with half-heartedly.” Hearing him, I couldn’t help but laugh.

“Man, you sound like one of those guys in the movies. Get real. She isn’t even aiming for me in the first place. And you know I am not one of those half-hearted bastards. If I do something, I commit to it.” Talking to Kyle like this made me feel a bit better, letting me take my thoughts off of depressing matters.

“I don’t know, Mike. Just be wary of her for now. If possible, cut all contact with her.”

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“Dude, are you still aiming for her even after she got a boyfriend? My ‘advice’ to you is that you don’t even think about it, otherwise I will be the first one to beat you up.”

“Mike, is she that important to you?” The constant serious tone of Kyle is getting on my nerves. He is making it a bigger deal than it is supposed to be.

“Just keep what I said in mind. If you need me, then I’ll be there for you whenever and wherever.” Kyle says as he closes the call. I am not sure what is going on in his mind. This isn’t like the usual Kyle I know. Normally, we’d be joking about the situation by now, messing with each other. Maybe Kyle is just that serious about getting along with her, but I knew Kyle isn’t the type to try and steal someone else’s girl. He was a man of morals.

“Ahhh, fuck this,” I tell myself. The entire day has become a lot more painful to bear. I hit the sack and let some steam off my mind. Otherwise, I’d be the first one to go through the experience of balding in school. It doesn’t take long for me to fall asleep, I am tired. But it doesn’t seem I can rest easy.

Soon after I wake up, I realize I am in school. Was everything that happened a dream? That is some vivid nightmare I had. Turning in front, I realize I am all alone, except for two more people. It is Susan and Kyle. They are hugging each other. Kyle smirks towards my direction while Susan is apathetic to me. She turns towards Kyle and puckers her lips. Kyle leans in for the kiss as his eyes keep staring at me like he is flaunting his new girl. I want to get out of here, but it feels like I am restricted by something. I couldn’t move my body as I want to, I just keep looking at them as they continue to mind their own business.

I suddenly jolt out of bed. My heart is palpitating like anything. My clothes are covered in sweat. It seems like it is nothing more than a nightmare. Though I tried to get it out of my mind, I just couldn’t. We sometimes consider nightmares as the realization of one’s inner fears. I couldn’t agree more after what I went through. It makes it more apparent that I have regained feelings for Susan, even though I am not planning to get her to be with me.

I hate people cheating each other, no; I abhor it. Even if I were to die, I would rather not break someone else’s relationship just to satisfy my desires. It went against my code of conduct as a man. I need to straighten these feelings of mine before they spiral out of control. I got up from my bed and start playing games by myself. It is the middle of the night, but I had nothing better to do. I couldn’t get into the mood to play though, the thoughts of Susan keep plaguing my mind.

Tomorrow is the day I go on a date with her. It is surely a date, but it is going to be one with no genuine feelings, it is only practice. Susan isn’t my woman, she belongs to someone else. Why am I so pathetic to let the love of my life be taken so easily? Maybe if I spent more time with her and didn’t try to distance ourselves… it is too late for regrets, but… if only I got another chance.

But that is all wishful thinking. Susan has someone else whom she holds dearly in her heart, and I knew she is serious about it. The passionate gaze in her eyes is enough for me to understand how important this relationship is to her. Those feelings of unwavering affection of hers, that loyalty, I couldn’t help but appreciate those feelings. It is rare to see women who were these devoted in today’s time, where illicit relationships were the norm. The birthing of children is prioritized over one’s feelings. This led to both men and women being loose towards whom they bedded. Girls like Susan were one of a kind.

“I’d be lucky to get a girl half as good as her,” I say to myself. Slowly, as I progress through the levels, I become sleepy again. It didn’t take long until I fell asleep in front of my computer.

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