Chapter 180: Chapter 179 [Barry]

Barry stood in front of the room where Kajou and Pan were imprisoned. The door was closed, so he couldn’t hear what was going inside, but he could readily enough guess that the guards were putting both maidens into the same restraints as the previous time around. His thoughts turned to the piece of paper in his hand, a full page of densely packed words and black smears. The eighth draft he’d been working on all night.

He hadn’t been able to sleep, not when his thoughts went straight to Pan and Kajou.

It had been a long night of mad scribbling on the paper, trying desperately to put into words the things that were needling at his mind. The fear, the anger, the… everything. A desperate dash with charcoal stained fingers, an attempt to rip the things inside his mind and plaster them on the paper, to get rid of them for good. But now that he stood in front of the door, he was of half a mind to start running and never turn back. But the image of Embla raising her axe and bringing it down on the two sisters turned into a knot in his gut.

Was he doing this for the Court? Embla? Kajou? Himself?

Barry couldn’t find the answer by the time the doors opened. With a heavy breath, he stepped inside. Pan and Kajou were in the same chairs as the day prior, only their sides had been switched. They both glared at him, one far more intense than the other, but there was an unfriendly edge in their eyes all the same.

“I… I’m going to remove the gag.” He said, approaching Pan. “And… you can say whatever you want. Okay?”

She had no answer, only a glare and a snarl.

“Okay, then.”

Reaching for the gag, he tugged at the knot, letting it fall from her mouth.

“You should be the one tied up, not us.” She spoke with a dark, slow hiss to her words.

“Yeah, well, that… is a valid opinion to have, and I respect it.” He coughed, shifting his gaze to the papers. “I… I wanted to tell you something, so I’d…”

“I hope your soul burns along with the other human filth. You are just as bad as all the other humans.” She spat.

“That’s… that’s wrong, but coming back to the-.”

“You tricked Kajou, played her for her kindness. You used us just so you could trick the Court.”

“H-hey, that’s not a-.”

“And that’s what you do. That’s what all humans like you do. You are weak and pathetic, so you pretend to be harmless.” She pressed on. “But you aren’t, are you? You just look for the opportunity, when they lower their guard, when they’re defenseless, and you stab them in the back.”

Pan glared at him. Her gaze was fury and flames, she might have been bound, but the power behind those eyes would have turned him to ash there and then. Barry took half a step back, hesitating.

She didn’t stop.

“That’s what you are, filth. You betray everyone. You don’t know what loyalty is, you don’t know what love is. You slither and only see how to get what you want.”

The image of Veronica flashed across Barry’s mind. His eyes widened, a gasp escaping his lips and a cold sweat running down his back.

Pan was emboldened by his stunned silence. “That’s right, I can see through you. You might have tricked the others, but you’ll betray everyone. Like all the other humans, you’d kill your own family if-.”

Her words had come to an abrupt stop as Barry’s hand slapped her clean across the face.

There was no wound, no redness in her face. Yet it was hard to discern who of the two was more surprised.

The Valkyrie took it as vindication, sneering. “See? In the end, you are all the same.”

“What would you know about family?” Barry’s hands clenched. “You, you of all people.”

“Don’t you-.”

“No, SHUT UP!” He roared, stepping towards her. “You don’t know what loving your family means. I saw you, I saw it with my own two eyes. I spent weeks in that hellhole you made for me and the only thing I saw from you was disdain and hate for your own sister!”

“Liar.” She hissed.

“Really? REALLY? Because I remember Kajou being terrified of you, afraid that you would attack her or abuse her physically if she said something that would push you over the edge.” His voice was shaking as his tone voice. “That’s not love, that’s control. You’d attack your own sister over a disagreement.”

“I’d never kill her.”

“AND WHO GIVES A SHIT!?” He screamed. “You can heal her back up, so who cares? Just cut and cut and cut and cut her some more. Carve everyone into tiny little pieces. So long as you can put them back together. WHO CARES!? There’s no scar, no wound, no bleeding, so of course it means nothing. CUT THEM UP, WHO CARES!? JUST TORTURE THEM FOREVER!”

The color was draining from Pan’s face. “I-.”

“You know who gives a shit? I do!” Barry’s hands were shaking. “You are a horrible person. You made me spend every waking moment in that forest fearing for my life! I should be ecstatic to see you die, to be rid of the nightmares of you stabbing me through the fucking heart like I’m some glorified pincushion!”

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“You d-.”

“SHUT UP! SHUT UP! SHUT UP!” His ears were ringing, his chest hot. “Justice isn’t killing everyone you don’t like! Fairness isn’t determining someone’s merit based on what they are! Having the power to shut up the people that don’t agree with you isn’t being right. It’s being a tyrant!”

Barry panted heavily, glaring. Every part of him was alight with adrenaline. His whole body practically trembled under the sheer emotion and pressure that was exploding out of his chest like a sun.

“I’m fed up with this as much as you.” Speaking with a shaking whisper, he shook his head. “No one deserves to be treated like they’re trash or expendable. No one deserves to be oppressed or mistreated, even less just because they were born a certain way. I just want to help fix this. Is that too much to ask?”

“Then why save me?”

Pan whispered the question. Her eyes held a glare, but she looked as drained as he was.

“I don’t know.” Barry’s shoulders slumped. His throat felt hoarse. “I just… I don’t think Kajou deserves that.”

As he spoke the words, a jolt ran through his body. The sensation was one he was growing to recognize, of a bond forming. Confusion crossed his features as he stared into Pan’s eyes. She looked back at him, but there was no recognition or reaction, only a long distant look, as she was lost in thought.

Barry turned to look at Kajou, her face contorted into shock as she met his eyes. The cloudy, unfocused edges were gone entirely. She was bonded. And that only confused him.

“A bond, at its core, is a connection.”

The voice came from the entrance of the room, all heads turned. Embla stood at the door, arms crossed. She was not wearing her armor.

“It requires both parties to be willing to reach out for one another.”

“I didn’t…”

“Barry, you’ve had your hand extended to both these girls.” Embla stepped closer, looking at Pan and Kajou. “All they had to do was reach out for you. And one of them has.”

“Kajou?” Pan’s voice trembled, pain clear in her eyes.

“No, Pan, I-.”

Pan shook her head, snarling. “You… you’ve betrayed me!”

Barry froze, reaching out and grasping Embla’s hand. “Don’t. Please don’t. Don’t kill her.”

“She has time to change her mind, if she so wishes.” She replied, though she did not move.

“She might be a bad person, but she doesn’t deserve to die.”

Embla tightened her grip on his shoulders. “I gave my ruling, it will not change.”

“So she just gets to suffer your cruelty?”

"If she does not accept your kindness, then she will, yes.”

Looking down at Barry, her thumbs slowly traced circles on his shoulders, ignoring the screaming sisters behind him and focusing on his eyes.

“I am strong. This is how the strong rule.”

Barry moved to speak, to say something, but did not find the words. He barely got the strength to frown at her. And in return, Embla smiled, a soft, lonesome smile, a mere hint within the corner of her lips and a glimmer of something in her eyes.

“Take the throne from me. Only then will you be able to make the decisions.” She let go, turning to leave. “But the Valkyrie’s time will run out before then.”

He flinched, lowering his gaze. “What… what should I do?”

“Kindness is a powerful tool, and she’s clearly turned it down.” She whispered, leaning down, kissing the crown of his head tenderly. “What remains are unkind things.”

Letting go, she turned to leave.

With a gesture of her hand, the guards entered to release Kajou from her seat. The Amazoness didn’t put up a fight. Tears streaking down her cheeks as Pan hurled insults and screams, thrashing against the bindings of her chair furiously.

Everything grew silent when the door closed shut.

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