"I still don't want to talk about Canada but I still want to inform you of something I have decided to do and I want you to keep an open mind."
"Fine. What do you want to talk about?"
"I want to adopt Nolani as my kid and I know what you are going to say, I am too young to be a father and I am jumping into something, I have no business jumping into" Jason was suddenly nervous but not for himself but for Nolani. He wants her to have a relationship with her grandma but it won't happen unless Elixir accepts her into the family.
"I wasn't going to say you are too young. After all, when I was your age, you were six years old"
Elixir saw a bench that was not too far off from them and she took a seat. It was a conversation one has to have sitting down. Jason sat beside her.
"What are you thinking? Do you think I am way in over my head?"
He wondered why her opinion matters to him that much. Maybe, he knew that she wouldn't approve of bringing some child into their family. A child that he almost died saving. Or maybe, she thinks it was unwise bringing an innocent child into their crazy family and drama.
"What I think doesn't really matter, Jason. I know I am too youngish to be a grandmother but I have always wanted a bunch of them! And I would have preferred you do it the right way but what the hell, who cares" Elixir crossed her legs. Maybe her choice of clothing for the stroll wasn't a good one since she was already feeling cold. The sleeveless black gown wasn't a good idea but it was gorgeous and fancy. She tucked her hands neatly under each other and kept speaking.
"What I think doesn't really matter, Jason. You sound like you want me to talk you out of the adoption. I just want to know why"
"You are cold, Mom. Let's get you back to your room"
"No, we can't have this conversation with Nolani and John within hearing distance. I am fine"
Jason took off the Jacket he was wearing. Leaving just the blue V-neck shirt he still had on and handed the Jacket to his mother.
"Jason, you need the Jacket. You are sick, remember?" Elixir pushed it away.
"The doctor gave me a clean bill of health. You are the one who won't stop fussing and hovering over me."
Jason presented the jacket to her again and he could see she was about to make a smart remark and decline.
"Mom, it's either you take it or we go back inside…your choice"
Elixir thought about it for a minute before she took the Jacket and wore it.
"Thanks, baby" she muttered.
"I don't want you to talk me out of it.....right?" Jason sounded uncertain now. Maybe he did. He just doesn't know anymore. It was a crazy idea. He was a twenty eight years old bachelor and he wanted to adopt a three year old girl. It was unheard of. And the bloggers back home would have a field day with the story.
"You do. First, you framed the question in a definite way because you know I would argue with you since I would want to know why I wasn't included in decision making process. Tell me what is really bothering you, sweetheart"
Jason should know now that Elixir could see through him and see the real question underneath. He took his time to construct his questions. It wasn't every time he allowed the woman that raised him see him vulnerable.
He squeezed his palm together and took a deep breath.
"What if I am like James? What if whatever he is I have it in my genes? And I go ahead and adopt this kid and just treat her like James"
Elixir always wanted Jason to stop referring to his father by his name. It wasn't just disrespectful to James but to her also and if it was any other time, Elixir would call him out on it but it wasn't and her son was in crisis and needed her help.
"But what if you are like me, Jason?" Elixir asked out of nowhere "What if you fall hopelessly in love with your kid the first time you held him? What if you were dazzled the first time he smiled at you even though there was a possibility that he was just releasing gas? What if you promise to love him to world without end? What if you will do anything to protect your kid? Don't forget Jason, I am your parent too"
"I know, mom. I didn't mean it like that"
"I know you didn't but I want those questions to come to play in your mind whenever you think about possibility of becoming your parent."
Jason thought the conversation was already over. He didn't get the answer he needed or wanted but he decided not to push the matter further.
Elixir cleared her throat.
"You are not like James. You are not like me either. I can learn a thing or two about being good and kind and selfless from you. I mean you saved a little girl from a burning building. I wouldn't have done that. The only way I would is if you were inside. You are nothing like James and I think you be a great father" Elixir encouraged.
"You think so?"
"I know so. And whenever in doubt just remind yourself or better still, call me. And Jason, don't run into a burning building ever again. I can tell you with certainty that if something should happen to you, I...I simply won't exist. I would stop functioning and I won't.... exist" Elixir was surprisingly supportive and calm.
Jason wondered whether he should tell his mother that she was the first person he thought of when he was in the burning building.
"I love you, Mom" he said instead.
Inside, Elixir was ecstatic and overjoyed; if Jason gets a new daughter then he would want a wife. He was not the type of man to raise a kid all alone without help. She sensed that in a not too distant future, she will be getting a daughter in law and she will finally be able to get rid of James for good.
"I love you too, baby. So.... does that mean I can get my lawyers to start the adoption process?"
"Yes. Yes except I will get my lawyers to do it and you will stay out of it" Jason narrowed his eyes to make sure she knew how serious he was.
"Sure thing"
Elixir took out her phone in his presence and texted her lawyers.
"You are not going to stay out of it, are you?"
Elixir simply smiled "Nope. If I want things done right, I do it myself"
Jason simply shook his head and smiled too.
"Okay, I will be leaving tomorrow. My flight is by 3pm.... don't smile like that or I will extend my stay.. Now, that part of the Orphanage is gone, you have your work cut out for you. And it needs to be done in two years"