As soon as Amelia groaned, disgusted, Alan glanced at her and gasped. “A-Amelia, you look extremely pale! Are you feeling…? Are you… Are you puking a rainbow?”

“That is one of the many ways Users can customize their avatar,” Consteline said, giggling. “Doesn’t it look cute?”

“The sickly sounds say the opposite…” Alan muttered while rubbing Amelia’s back.

“Something like that happened to me when I overate. It was not pleasant,” Ashley said from her place at the dinner table, while continuing stuffing her mouth with cookies.

“Don’t overeat then.”

 

***

**

*

 

Three non-digital years ago.

"Please, no! Don't hurt her!" a girl cried while a security guard pulled her by the arms. In front of her, another guard had tossed her service automaton to the ground.

"Hurt her?! This is just a toy, brat! Earth is getting fucked by dolls like this, and you brought one here?! This is a controlled environment!"

"I'm sorry! Just turn her off and seal her away somewhere, but don't…!" The girl lost her voice at the sight of the guard pulling out his handgun.

The automaton looked up at her, as if it wanted to express that everything was alright. "Ast--" Two gunshots later, it stopped moving.

"You're going to pay for this!" the girl cried, while the other guard struggled to take her away.

A young employee pushing a cart full of scrap metal watched it all with a shocked expression on his face.

"You, technician," the guard who pulled the trigger called. "Take this junk away."

"Y-yes!" the boy said, while he still could hear the enraged cries of that girl.

 

***

 

"I have already talked with the chief of security, and they'll offer a formal apology tomorrow morning," a man in his late forties said while serving himself a glass of scotch.

The fifteen-year-old girl sneered from her seat. A wig was resting on the desk in front of her, looking like a flat, lifeless ginger cat. "That won't be necessary, dad, I don't hold a grudge against that guy."

The blonde man with icy blue eyes turned to her, frowning. "You're not mad about what that guard did to your maid-bot?"

"I'm not a kid anymore," the girl grinned. "I know why he did it. We're all a little anxious lately about this global crisis, so it's understandable why he acted like that."

"You're telling me you're fine." The man approached her and leaned on his desk.

"Yeah!" She chuckled, shrugging.

The man took a long sip without taking his eyes off her. "Promise me you won't make a scene then."

"No."

"Excuse me?"

"I can't promise you that, dad. Today I feel fine, but tomorrow may feel completely different. You can't control raw emotions, you know."

The top executive stared at her eyes before exhaling deeply. "Just be careful, honey."

 

***

 

The next day, the raw emotions told her it was not over yet, for the reflection in her restroom's mirror showed her a restless girl.

She stared at her skinhead hairstyle and caressed her head, feeling her skull. The wig waiting in the sink seemed to mock her. She hated the thing.

I'll use you one more time.

Before going out, she applied pink gloss, checked how her bosom looked with that push-up bra and tank top, and put the wig on.

Five long minutes later, despite the facilities' maze-like corridors, she arrived at the lobby easily, although she had only been there once.

And there he was, pretending to be busy.

The guard acted reluctant to talk to her at first, thinking she had come to whine and bicker about last day's situation, but after two minutes of her leaning forward so that her pressed breasts looked like bursting out of her clothes at any second, he became friendlier.

He even let her get inside the office to show her the security monitors. Every time he joked, she corresponded with childish giggles, even though her body had fully developed, which captivated him. 

That allowed her to get close enough to unbutton his gun belt and snatch the weapon. She knew how to unlock the safe, and shot at his right thigh without flinching.

"What the hell, brat?!" The man fell from his chair, and before he could cry for help, she quickly crouched and put the gun's fuming cannon in his mouth, burning his tongue and palate.

She whispered in his ear: "This is for abusing your power. I've investigated, and you didn't have the right to dispose of private property. Legally, bots are not alive, so you didn't commit a crime. And technically speaking, it would be stupid to trade your life for hers. So I think this will suffice to get even, you and me. This company has a great risk insurance, so they'll heal you quickly. Now, I'll leave quietly, and let's forget that we ever crossed paths, okay?"

She grabbed her wig and threw it along with the gun in the trash can before slamming the door. There was no need to escape running. She just strolled while hearing other security guards rush in the opposite direction.

The void in my chest… Hasn't gone away.

A boy his age passed her by, and his backtracking steps were loud and annoying. "You're that girl, right?" he asked, getting his feet in her field of vision. "From yesterday in the lobby?"

She looked up to glare at him. She did not have the energy or the patience to deal with anyone. But when he reached out his hand to show her something, she frowned. "What the hell is that?"

"Take it," he insisted in an almost demanding tone. "It's a pendant I crafted with a piece of your maid-bot's memory drive."

After hearing that, the girl's eyes opened widely, observing the strange fake jewel, recognizing its metallic material. She accepted it and inspected it. It was pretty in an awkward kind of way.

"You loved your maid-bot, right?" he asked.

"Her name was Miss Cooper," she corrected, acting upset, "and yes, she was my friend."

"I'm so sorry that this place's rules are so strict. I was the one in charge of dismantling her and…" he paused after seeing the appalled expression on her face. "...And I swear that I treated her in the most humane way possible!"

"Humane?" she sneered. "Are we still talking about an automaton?"

He folded his arms. "Are you going to keep that or not?" he asked impatiently, meeting her cold eyes.

"Yes, this belongs to me anyway."

"Good," he smiled, satisfied.

"Alan," a woman wearing a lab coat called aloud from the far end of the corridor. "Your lunch hour is over!"

"Y-yes, boss!" He turned back without saying goodbye nor waiting for gratitude, which felt wrong to her.

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"Wait!" she cried, making him stop midway through. Great! What do I say now? He looked in a hurry, and she hated being pressured. "How did you recognize me? I'm not wearing my…" She unconsciously raised a hand close to her scalp.

He stared at her face before his eyes darted to her chest. He blushed immediately. "T-there's not many Tandem in these facilities, you know? And you're the only new face around here! Anyway-seeya-takecare-bye!"

Astrid stood in her place looking at him go, while the pendant on her hand told her everything was somewhat alright.

 

***

 

I stayed in Kintech for just one month, and I never saw him again.

I roamed the corridors in my free time, and went to the cafeteria at different hours of the day, but nothing. And I was too stubborn to ask if someone knew about him.

Why did I want to see him again, anyway? 

Once I moved to the Caelum headquarters, I wished to forget all about his annoying, persistent memory…

But how could I? I was surrounded by adults… Scientists, engineers, programmers… And the only guys my 'age' were others in the Somnium Project. Cocky, whiny, spoiled brats. So his stupid memory became a nuisance! Please, just get out of my head already!

Six months later, I could not even remember his face or the name that woman called him.

I was free.

Until I saw him arrive at Caelum, 1 year and 7 months later. There he was, applying for a chance to board the Santa María in the booth beside mine. What were the freaking odds!

Destiny, was that you?

I recognized him right away, despise lying to myself that I wanted to forget him. His presence became a distraction, an obsession all over again. Why did I feel that way?! 

I had spent most of my life glued to pods and stuck to machines, growing up in fake environments, testing whatever the developers had invented that week, getting mentally older inside those virtual sandboxes while my body remained in its teenage years. I was too occupied to even think about getting close to someone!

I desperately needed to know how it felt being close to anyone…

Maybe trying it out with him would satiate this freaking, aching feeling.

Days passed, and finding him became difficult again. The anxiety was eating me inside. I was afraid of not being able to see him outside The Novus, because I wanted to talk and see him with my own eyes, not through the system’s.

After learning that he had volunteered to help inside the facilities, I knew how to reach him, and I waited in that corridor like a predator. Maybe my father was right when he used to call me a lioness.

But… oh, no, anxiety again! Was I acting too stalkerish?! No, bad Astrid, don't think like that! It's too late now! There he is! No time for cowardice now! Go, lioness, and devour him whole! 

I Intentionally crashed against him, forcing him to help me collect what I have ‘accidentally’ tossed, and… Wait, no, no! I wasn't ready yet! While his eyes were too busy grabbing the blankets, I quickly hid the crafted pendant inside my clothes.

Stupid, stupid me.

He didn't recognize me; I realized it immediately. I had finally let my hair grow after protesting with the Caelum engineers that shaving my head again would not improve their readings anymore, now that The Novus was at its final Beta build.

Our first talk after two years...

I smiled at him, shyly at first, and I noticed that his eyes looked absent, the same as mine, before imposing myself on this secret mission. Could it be that he had also been chained to a lab or workshop, forced to grow up to meet the expectations of a selfish adult?

Maybe we had more in common than I expected.

 

***

 

We spent a week knowing each other, sharing the same table at the cafeteria, and messaging us when we had to go to our quartets.

And I'll never forget those days…

Even though my mind was that of a thirty-something, he made me feel seventeen again. I could be as childish and immature as I wanted, and he would find it adorable. He made me laugh, and I made him uncomfortable every time I held his hand.

Even though we were both tech-savvy, we rarely talked about the subject. We would rather spend our free time imagining what a dragon wearing a tuxedo would look like, or wondering if pegasus and unicorns really existed. According to our research, yes, they were as real as something called platypus.

On the seventh day, when we boarded the Santa María, I realized that we were now alone. I remember myself grabbing his hand as he gave me words of encouragement.

I had been surrounded by adults my whole life until turning one, and now, when the spaceship left Earth's atmosphere, I only had him.

I felt happy for having him by my side and sad about leaving everything and everyone behind.

Never in my entire life had felt that way.

I asked him to be my boyfriend just before getting into the Cryo-Chambers, demanding that he should find me inside.

Later, when he woke me up in the Renovatio Caves, I cried and hugged him. I wanted to bang my head against those rocky walls for not hugging him earlier when I still had the chance and it was still real. But crying on his shoulder calmed all the doubts, anger, and self-hatred I was still holding.

I realized I loved him.

 

***

 

I loved him during that wonderful week, having adventures and leveling up before he disappeared.

I loved him while I waited for his return.

I loved him while I had to move on and take care of the guild.

I couldn't stop loving him when I reluctantly accepted Marco's proposal to be a couple.

I loved him even more when he finally appeared again.

His presence reminded me of how shy and inexperienced I was about love, so much that I couldn't think straight and would constantly look away in shame.

Then the incident happened…

And the dark entity within me awakened.

Did I really love him? Or was I just infatuated by the idea of Him?

It had been 5 years since I met him, and we had only stayed together by measly 15 days…

Maybe we were not meant to be together, ever, but my stubbornness couldn't let him go.

As… if I was upset with life itself for denying me the happiness I've always wanted.

If destiny was getting in my way, I would punch its stupid metaphorical face and rebel against it!

I like how He makes me feel, so what’s wrong with that?!

I rebelled against destiny when I asked Monique Ascencio to have an eye on Him and inform me about his every move!

I rebelled when I bought His Beginner's armor set and his old sword from that Kristoff dealer and put it on a mannequin in my room! 

Oh, his Beginner's Shirt is so huggable... If only the system could keep the smell and odor of sold stuff! Hu, hu, hu.

And I will definitely rebel now that the Red Bitch is getting in my way!