D2.
From some point on, Dante felt that he was becoming strange.
The first thing he felt was when he thought her nonchalant nature was unsatisfactory. More bluntly, he wished she had an interest in him, and he wanted her to look at him even half the way he looked at her.
It was strange to think that his interest was aroused by her indifference to him, but Dante lightly dismissed that fact.
As if the awareness of the strangeness was a catalyst, Dante began to be more and more swept away by his own change.
[We’ve been dating for about two months.]
When he pretended to be her lover in the village, he was frankly more glad than ashamed. He liked being able to hold her hand and walk beside her, even if it was just for a show.
[‘Aren’t we going together?]
[…? Why am I going with you?]
As a result, he wanted to be with her everywhere, even in the village, and he came to ask if she would go with him even for a simple walk.
[That’s right. It’s harder to light the lights, but I’m not well enough to do that.]
The desire to be together somehow became the desire to reach her out, then somehow that became the desire not to be separated. He didn’t want to lose the time to sit with her and be close to her, so he blurted out a lie.
Every time he noticed those brown eyes staring at him, heat rose from his head to toe. At every word she said, he looked at his own appearance, which he had never been interested in, and the moment she said that the earrings looked good on him, he came to wear those every day.
Even when he says a word, he looks at her mood. He was afraid that this might sound strange to her, and he regretted his cold-spoken past.
He was literally ‘swept away’ by change, and he himself was the least adaptable to this change. How could he care so much about someone? Even against a person who has no interest in herself.
In something that had never happened in his entire life, Dante was often flustered and clumsy. It was only natural that he couldn’t control it, since he didn’t even name his emotions in the first place.
At some point, Dante began to vaguely guess the identity of the emotion, but he tried to ignore it. He believed that this feeling was nothing more than that, even though he might think it was a feeling of affection between humans.
Suddenly, there were many days when the Master’s advice came to mind, but it wasn’t like that. There was also a feeling that if he pretended not to know, it would disappear before he could admit it.
His cheeks and white hair, which turned red just by standing in front of her, showed that ignorance was useless, but Dante really turned away. Yeah, as far as it really goes.
But even at that moment, his feelings were growing enough to break his shallow facade.
***
If she went out for an early lunch, why isn’t she coming? The small mutterings scattered through the empty house.
Dante looked at the window full of sunset, once again shutting his mouth. When he realized that he had been complaining to himself, he belatedly felt embarrassed.
But aside from the fact that he was acting like a child, it was also true that she returned later than usual.
It was also useless to belatedly regret that he should have followed her. She says with a determined expression that she wants to go alone this time, but how can he not listen to that.
As he can tell from the fact that she dared to leave him alone today, she must have been accustomed to moving alone.
In fact, it was the same with Dante in the past. Always bothered by people’s attention, he preferred spending time alone, and in fact, there was a time when he ran away to get out of sight of his secretary, saying he wanted to be alone.
There was only one difference between them. That she was Dante’s exception, yet Dante wasn’t hers.
“…”
Dante tried to think about why that made him feel sad, but he reflexively gave up.
However, the sadness he once felt didn’t go away even if he tried not to find the reason, so he tried to think of something else to increase his mood.
He knows, for example, that it’s not only he who has changed, but that she has also changed. Fortunately, no, he wasn’t relieved enough to call it fortunate, but her insensitive attitude wasn’t spotless either.
Every day she laughed better, and grew kinder. It was a very minor change, but it was clearly felt by Dante. She seemed pleasant and comfortable at the moment when she was talking to him, even though she didn’t reveal her true feelings.
Dante was the first to feel the change, and he was the most delighted with it. He wanted her to feel as comfortable with himself as he had with her. And, if possible, he wanted her to be comfortable.
So that she can think that it would be better for her to stay with Dante.
Despite his rare time alone, Dante was spending his time thinking of her, as he always did.
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Realizing that he kept thinking of only one person, he tried to think of something else, but he remembered her again like a repeat sign. Sitting on the couch that he liked because they often sat together there.
Now he knew that he couldn’t describe his condition with the word ‘strange’. He also couldn’t shake the feeling that he was ignoring his problems and covering them up.
Since when did he become like this? Looking back, he couldn’t remember anything clearly. At some point, it was only clear that the emotions became clearer, and it was already too late for him to do something
A feeling that can’t be controlled, a heart that doesn’t go according to one’s will, and a small sense of happiness felt in between.
At the moment of realizing it all, Dante finally had the idea that something was wrong.
There was a person who was confident that no one would ever become his precious one, and the said person only now realized what state he had become. Suddenly, as if his feet had collapsed, he came to his senses, and indescribable emotions began to flood him.
The first sensation that came to him was, ironically, the closest to despair. He was seized with nervousness as if something had landed deep in his heart, and that his future would be ruined.
He thought that if he had the feeling he thought everyone else would never feel, then he had to get out of here right away. It was an instinctive and impetuous thought.
It was just an idea, but he couldn’t put it into action. He said he had to leave as soon as possible, yet he didn’t want to.
It was strange. He had recovered his body enough to go anywhere now.
At that moment, there was a rattling noise at the door, and the person he had been waiting for all day appeared.
“What is this, have you been waiting for me?”
Dante didn’t answer. No, it would be accurate to say that he couldn’t. He couldn’t find an appropriate answer as he watched her reddish-brown hair sway vividly in the reflection of the sunset.
The last blazing rays of the sun passed between them just before dark. Whether or not she knew that Dante was frozen, she stepped on the sunset and came to him at once.
“It took longer than I thought. Did your day go well?”
“…Yeah.”
No, actually it didn’t. He had just experienced the feeling of being forcibly dragged down a cliff.
But her expression was calm, and Dante didn’t want to see any worry or wonder on her face. It was after she smiled lightly that he realized he had answered in the affirmative without even realizing it.
“It’s been a long time since I went down to the village alone, so I was worried for a long time. Originally, I had more left to buy, but I came because I had something I wanted to show you.”
The moment he flinched when she smiled, his heart fluttered when she said that there was something she wanted to show.
No, it shouldn’t be like this. He was the one who thought he had to ‘get away’ until just before that. But before Dante could make up his mind, she pulled out something from her own bag.
“Now, look at this.”
For a moment, he thought he saw something shiny, small, shining. The moment he confirmed what she had taken out, his breathing stopped.
A purple jewel shimmered in her hand. A jewel smaller than the palm of her hand, rather like a stone.
Seeing Dante blankly staring at the jewel, she whispered in a voice filled with laughter.
“I bought it because I thought of you.”
“…”
Ah. The moment he heard that, he wanted to die. It was because he noticed that he was delighted with one insignificant stone, and that the fact that she had bought it for him was the reason for his joy.
He’s just happy that it reminded her of him.
He tried so hard to turn away, but in the end.
Her eyes were more reddish than usual in the reflection of the sunset. Her amber-colored eyes filled with red ripples were folded finely, forming an arc
“Here, take it. Normally, I wouldn’t have turned my head this way, but thanks to you, my pockets were getting thicker, so my eyes went blind. It has the same color as your eyes, right?”
Her voice seemed to fade, but then it stuck in his head one by one.
Clearly, the stone she was holding out was dull and shabby compared to his eyes. However, for this moment, it seemed more radiant and noble than any jewel in the world.
Rather he wanted the jewel to be with her forever, but at the same time he wanted it to somehow get into his hands.
The fingertips he reached out to receive the jewel were trembling.
At last, it was a disaster.
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