"You couldn't help what happened before," Graeme said, although he had trouble feeling the truth of the words.
Was she truly blameless in everything? It was hard to comprehend.
"But you can help us now," he finished. "Tell us about this Zagan character. If he is coming after August, what can we expect?"
That's right. He would be coming here for August, but that meant he might also come for her. Zoe's eyes dilated in fear.
"You can expect it to be flawless," she answered him, staring like a deer in headlights. "He can't be stopped."
Graeme bristled at the suggestion that they had no chance. That was impossible.
"Why do you say that?"
"He's been around for centuries. Maybe longer… he passed all of that knowledge into me that I had, all of that skill and logic and flawless execution. If Andreas would have let me, I could have done so much worse than I did. So much worse," she shook her head, mouth hanging open at the stunning realization.
She hated Andreas, but his tendency toward caution that she always thought of as cowardly had actually been a good restraint. If allowed, she would have proceeded with many, many experiments on the lycans of this pack. Her quest was always for knowledge.
"He gave me all of that intelligence and took away my grasp of most emotions. And what he gave me is only a fraction of what he truly is. He would never allow himself to be rivaled by someone like me."
"How did he do it?" Graeme asked. "How did he give you intelligence like that and make your memories of him and of your past vanish?"
"Um…" she searched her memory. "They were trying various things with me. I don't know what all they were, because I was't told. I was just kept in a room with some things I requested to keep me relatively happy. I rarely saw him unless he wanted my blood. There were others who would take me around sometimes and test me… but I think I was quite a disappointment as alyko go," she chuckled.
"I couldn't do anything. He must have been frustrated. I don't know. I started losing time, blacking out, and then one night I was taken into a different room. It was huge… with a glass ceiling and windows that curved," she traced it in the air with her fingers. "I was mesmerized by it. I hadn't seen the sky in weeks probably, and it was so clear that night. I could see the moon. That was the last day before I became Zosime."
"What happened?" August asked from beside her.
"I don't remember that part. At least, not entirely. There was a couch he led me to. He told me to lie back, and then he was sitting next to me. He was so terrifying, but at that moment, he was almost… nice."
'There's one more test I have for you, little one,' he had told her, flat black eyes skittering over her face. The voice, so smooth and hypnotic curled in her memory like smoke.
Zoe let out a tremulous breath. "And then I became who you met. Frozen in time."
"Do you know where the alyko are kept who are taken?" Graeme asked as he stood over her.
"No, I don't," she said apologetically. "I mean, I know where I was kept. But I never saw any of them. And I don't know… how to get there or where it is geographically." She raised the ice pack back to her face.
Graeme groaned internally. Of course she didn't know.
"Can I talk to you, Graeme?" August stood and gestured to the doorway. He nodded and followed her out.
"I know we need information from her, but she just came out of whatever state she has been in for who knows how many years. She seems so much different. Even the way she talks… she sounds like a different person. I can't imagine what kind of trauma that is… to go through what she's gone through and come out the other side realizing you've been someone else this whole time. I think we should give her some time to recover and let things come back to her," August said in a hushed voice. "By leading her with questions, I think we're going to miss things that could be important."
"But these are things we need to know now," he argued.
"I know, but…" she sighed, trying to think of how to explain the feeling she was getting from that girl in there. "It will be better if she makes connections on her own and then brings them to us. We know a little bit. Let's give her a chance to heal and allow the memories to continue coming to her. She's not the same Zosime. That's someone else in there, and she's grappling with that fact in a much more personal way than we are."
Graeme's arms were crossed like he was attempting to block himself from what she was saying, so she tugged gently on one of them until they both fell at his sides.
"Today is Samhain. There is a lot going on. Let's deal with all of that first, okay? And then maybe tomorrow she will be even more rested and able to help. I just don't know how to explain what I'm sensing from her… I feel that it is not all there for her right now in her mind. And pushing is only going to make it harder for her and for us."
Graeme sighed and nodded. If his mate could sense that this wasn't going to be as helpful for them right now as he was hoping it would be, then she was probably right.
"Are we still going to have her speak to everyone tonight?" she asked.
"She is a much more compelling witness now than she was before," he nodded. "Especially with the wounds he inflicted on her."
"Okay," she replied.
She felt badly that Zoe would need to be put on display for the whole pack to see and hear when she was still coming to terms with what had happened to her. But today was the day the elders' truths would be cast into the light. There was no avoiding it.
"We're going to let you rest," August told the girl. "But I'll be back later, okay?"
Zoe nodded, the ice pack still pressed against her face as she drank her ice water through a straw.
"Lucas, you should rest, too," Graeme told the male who was back to standing by the window.
"I'm okay, sire," Lucas replied.
Graeme studied him for a moment before nodding his acceptance of Lucas' wishes. He was still refusing to leave her.