Chapter 2: Chapter 1 : What is the fluid that comes out of the eyes?

My name is Sazanka Aira. Since childhood, I have been used to living alone without any warm affection from my parents.

Mom and dad are always busy working, ignoring me who still wants this warmth. Even when I was in the third grade of elementary school, my parents bought a new house near their company and left the old house and myself to a hired maid.

It's true that my parents work very far, far outside the city so the thought of buying a new house close to where they work makes sense. But I don't like it. I really wish they could at least pay attention to me even for a moment. The fact that they always ignore me is very painful.

For example, when I got a perfect score in a school exam, they just gave a short answer, "I see, that's natural for my daughter". Then they continue to work as usual, without any other special treatment.

At that time, I just felt that the effort was still lacking to surprise mom and dad, so in order to get them to praise me more, I thought of increasing my efforts even more.

As a result, I earned top rankings, won various championships, and earned various awards. In both academic and non-academic, I was able to reach the top rank.

But even after I graduated from middle school, all those achievements were useless. I never once received warm praise from them. Even now, I feel like I always remember that even mom and dad never put a smile on my face for me.

I'm always lonely.

When there is a birthday celebration for a friend in the same class, I can only feel jealous of friends who can celebrate it with family.

For me, such as birthdays, New Year's celebrations, or my entry and graduation days, mom and dad never once did they celebrate it for me.

Even if there was help from the house maid, it couldn't make me happy at all.

I always think, do they always think I'm not important?

That's what makes me desperate.

So when I started my life in high school, I felt like I no longer had to try so hard just to get compliments from mom and dad. Because I thought it would all be for nothing.

Because even at the beginning of my high school years, on the day of the welcoming ceremony, as I expected, mom and dad didn't come to celebrate my success either. I've been really lost since that day.

Since then, I really don't want to go to school anymore. I even started truant and didn't attend classes just by giving fake sick excuses. And also never interested in participating in activities outside the classroom.

Always spending more time in the room. Like sleeping, playing games, or reading comics and other interesting things.

Even though the maid was worried, I didn't mind it. I didn't even respond to her existence.

I curled up on the bed hugging the dolphin bolster that I had previously bought with my own pocket money.

Togetherness? Parental warmth? Their affection? I don't need anymore. I'm a fool when I spend my time fighting for what can never be achieved.

Want them to compliment me? Why have I always wanted that in the first place. This is my own life, everything I should do is only for myself, not for anyone else. Why do I always want that stupid thing?

“Hah~...”

I sighed and tried to forget all about it then just tried to go to sleep.

Even so I somehow always thought that I wanted it.

Parental warmth.

Laugh together.

Hugs from a mother.

Casual chat with dad.

I'm always envious of it all after seeing my classmates can do it all.

I who always wanted to feel at least once the harmony of the family, was never achieved.

Until now, all these wishes have never been fulfilled.

The me who is always alone is already reflected in this dark room. So why am I thinking about it again?

I hugged the dolphin-shaped bolster tighter to get rid of all these thoughts, and for some reason there were wet circles on his cheeks.

I don't know, but on my cheeks, I also feel the same moisture.

My eyes were sore, as if I wanted to force something out. I closed my eyes as a reflex to reduce the pain.

Until finally a strange liquid that I had never known flowed from the corner of my eyes which made my pillow and bolster wet from this liquid.

I sobbed a little, but I could hold it in.

I feel like I don't want this sound to come out. If I took it out, the maid might hear it, so I tried to hold it in until only the sound of hiccups came out.

The pain in the eyes, the pain in the throat, and the tightness in the chest made me feel tired. I don't know how long I've had this. It's weird, I've never felt anything like this before. Why am I only experiencing this now? Is this a disease? I don't know what this is.

Then all that commotion, made me slowly but surely lose consciousness more and more. Until finally only the sound of soft sighs that I let out.

In the end I fell into a deep sleep and this will probably be my last deep sleep.

Because, at that time I felt my consciousness was pulled by something and continued to take me into a very dark darkness. It was dark and everything was just filled with dark stuff, I couldn't see anything at all anywhere. Hands, feet, or my own body, I can't see it.

You are reading story My Own Role Play at novel35.com

Even in the 1 mm field of view, I couldn't see anything. It was like I was transported into a room that was completely devoid of light and completely empty.

"Where is this?"

"Why is everything dark?"

All I know is that I should be in my room now and asleep.

Did the house electricity suddenly go out?

But even if it goes out, the darkness in this room will never get this far. Because even when the electricity in my room went out, I could still see at least some silhouettes of things.

But now I can't see anything.

Even I feel that I myself can't feel anything.

My own body, I don't feel it. Even the environment around me, which should have a mattress, table, and chair I can no longer feel it.

It felt like I was literally transported to a very dark and empty place.

Just what really happened.

Now all is dark. I became afraid of the dark.

Never in my life have I been trapped in this pitch black darkness, where even I can't feel my own body.

I became more and more afraid.

Please, someone tell me where this is.

Please someone take me out of this dark room.

I can't stand it anymore.

"Anyone,... please save me.... sniff~ sniff~,...."

I panicked and kept asking for help while crying. However, no one ever came to save me.

I curled up and continued to cry in the dark. Even so, change will never come to me. I began to suspect that I was alone in this dark place.

The longer I was alone here, the more I realized that I must be here alone. No one can save me.

Even if I walk everywhere, it's only darkness that I go to. In fact, the longer I walked, the more afraid I was that I would dive deeper into the darkness. The fact that I can't even look around scares me. Moreover, if I accidentally entered the abyss or stepped over such a dangerous thing, the thought frightened me even more.

Only anxiety and fear continue to overwhelm me.

I don't know what else to do myself.

Even though I want to keep crying, I feel like these tears have dried up.

All this time I must have been tired just to cry.

Crying out of fear in the dark.

And cry because I've been alone all this time.

“Anyone, help,… help,… me…”

I was desperate and lay in a place I didn't know myself.

In the dark eyes, I begged one last time. Who knows there is a destiny that can save me. Even though I thought something like that would never come, I just didn't want to give up hope.

“At least,... if this place,.... gets light,-...”

BLINK

“……?”

I suddenly froze in surprise.

Can't say much more for what I saw.

Can't believe the changes that have happened.

Really, what really happened.

The previously completely dark room turned bright white just when I expected this place to be completely light?

I can't really figure out what's really going on here.

You can find story with these keywords: My Own Role Play, Read My Own Role Play, My Own Role Play novel, My Own Role Play book, My Own Role Play story, My Own Role Play full, My Own Role Play Latest Chapter