Chapter 484: 135 - - Girl and Awaiting

Mr. Irme and Mr. Sheran were being monitored and were getting acclimated to the village. So far, they have not caused any noticeable problems to arise. Mr. Iloum is working very hard and Mr. Shehan says that he does not often leave Mr. Iloum's side. Everyone in the village said that it was easy to keep an eye on Mr. Shehan because he never leaves his side.

And Fito, who has come from that tribe as a hostage, is living a leisurely life. To be honest, we are not sure if they can communicate with God or not. We are not sure if this is true or not.

Mr. Lan said that it might be troublesome if Fito and Irumu meet. He said that he did not know how Ms. Iroum would behave toward a girl who was supposed to be able to communicate with God.

I thought that I might have to be aware of this after meeting Mr. Illume. I also thought that I might have to accept it. I have to accept it. I have to think more about the fact that I am different from the norm.

He assured me that I was a "child of God. Without any hesitation, he called me a godchild. I am still skeptical about whether I am a child of God, but I have come to understand that it is certain that I am different from other people.

So I have to accept that I am. I met Ms. Iloum, and in the face of her heavy thoughts, I thought to myself once again, "I am not really a godchild.

For example, what is a kamiko, if I really see myself as a kamiko?

It is generally said that a kamiko is loved by God, or that the land where a kamiko lives will prosper. But what does it mean to be loved by God? --If you hear that God loves you, you would think that you are a very happy being who knows nothing of misfortune. But that is not true.

My life in the village where I was born and raised was not a good one, when I think of the happiness I have now.

Meeting Ceefo and Raymer and the others, meeting Gaius and the others, made me happy. I learned about family and how to care about someone else. Until then, I had just lived.

And even after I felt happiness, I lost Athos and Nilsi's village was attacked---everything was not going well. I was almost sacrificed by Sireba and the elves, and after that, I had to fight with that powerful demon, and the spirit tree still hasn't recovered. I had careless contact with the people of the tribe, and Mr. Roma died as a result.

My life has never been all right, and there is no guarantee whatsoever that I will continue to live well.

If I were a godchild - it is not the kind of thing that a godchild would live happily. Ms. Lan said that a godchild would be involved in many things.

What is a godchild, after all?

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I am sure that God loves me, but if I am a godchild, then I am not a godchild. But if I am a godchild, then who is the God who cares about me?

The God who is watching over me.

I heard that the divine child has various different influences depending on the god. If I want to, will that god respond to me? Fito is said to be a special being who can communicate with the gods. If Fito really is such a being, then I wonder if he is more like a godchild. Various thoughts are going through my mind.

If I am really a being called a godchild--- and if I myself try to use the parts of me that are different from the rest of me, then I have to accept that fact more.

I am afraid that more and more people may look at me enthusiastically as a "godchild," just as Irum did this time. When I told them that I might be a "godchild," they did not change their attitude toward me. It was really just that I happened to meet such people, and if I might be a godchild---no, if I am a godchild, there are any number of people who would change their attitude, and I must be careful about what I say and do to such people. I have to be careful what I say and do to them.

I don't know what Mr. Illum might do with my words. He might take action on his own.

Therefore, I must be careful about what I say and what I do in front of Mr. Illume. I have to be careful about everything. In fact, I would like to spend all my time in a natural way without worrying like that, but I have no choice. I want to use my special part to the best of my ability to achieve my desired goal. Then I have to accept that special part of me and do the right thing.

---I have to accept the possibility that I might be a godchild, not that I might be a godchild. I will most likely be truly a godchild. It is natural to think of the changes in Reimer and Gaius as changes as a "knight" of the divine child. I am a godchild. I accept what I have been thinking that I might be all along. It doesn't mean that anything will happen because I accept it, but it is a matter of feeling.

God ...... is watching over me, God. I will do my best, please watch over me.

God is watching over me. God, who is the reason for my being different from others. I will use this power to my advantage and I will make my goals come true. I will do my best, so please watch over me," I told God in front of the altar.

---A girl and awareness.

(After meeting the faithful priest, the girl, a child of God, accepted this fact.)

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