Naruto AU: The Smut And The Healer

Chapter 1: Prologue+Chaps (1+2+3)


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Warning: This is an AU, time travel, harem erotic story. Boruto and extraterrestrial aliens don't exist here. Also, this isn't your usual prologue. This is Shizune's POV.
If you want to see where this all goes, please read.
XX
Somewhere in the Land of fire,
A certain inn, early dawn,
A time when Naruto and Sasuke were unrivaled in the world. Also, a time when daimyos and other feudal lords long since stopped mattering in economy and politics.
The 71-year-old Shizune looked at her master, who was on her deathbed, asking:
"...Tsunade-sama, I don't think I should ask after so long, but why did you never marry?"
"... Don't you have any regrets?"
"...About Jiraiya-sama for example. Sure he was a great pervert but also a good man…."
"...He sacrificed himself for the village and his ideals…."
"...Say Tsunade-sama…"
"...Do you hate perverts that much?"
Tsunade was holding the hand of the 71-year-old Shizune when she smiled and said. "Do you…really…want to know?"
Her vitality was on the brink of exhaustion. The differences between the hands were very conspicuous. Actually... Tsunade's hands looked young, without wrinkles, unlike Shizune.
It was amazing that the dying person was the last Senju princess. Shizune, who would continue to live for a good amount of time, looked more like her master's grandmother.
When Shizune nodded— tears in her eyes and her hand firmly clutching Tsunade's— the latter smirked and said sadly, melancholic but a bit amused at the same time:
"...Now that I'm dying, maybe I should tell you…."
"...As long as you promise not to hate me, Shizune…."
"Hate you? How could I Tsunade-sama?" Shizune asked, confused. In her opinion, no matter what happens, she couldn't hate her dying master.

All her life had been about following blindly and pleasing that master of hers. That even when they had to survive on alcohol and no food.
Often Shizune had stressful migraines and little grudges, but she always loved Tsunade. She loved her, perhaps even too much for that to be healthy...But that was a secret she promised to keep to herself...
Tsunade, that wild woman who barely knew how to care for herself, much less raise children, took her in...And raised her after her uncle Dan Kato died in the war.
For that, she was forever obliged and grateful. Even if Tsunade never taught her knowledge. But she did.
"Listen to me…" Tsunade coughed, feeling her end coming.
"...I loved your uncle and Jiraiya, but they both lacked something a woman of my caliber needs…."
"What would that be, Tsunade-sama?" Shizune listened attentively to her master's words. As if she was imparting important knowledge.
Shizune also felt that Tsunade was about to die. They both had felt this moment coming for over a month, but when it came, Shizune didn't want to believe it. She was heartbroken.
Tsunade inspired, the light in her eyes shining one last time. Before the vitality in those vanished, she said in a long sigh:
"...The most masculine dick I've ever seen and felt. My little brother's…"
"What? What did you just say, Tsunade-sama?!" Shizune, undergoing disbelief, and shock, when those incongruous and perverted words were spoken, exclaimed.
"Tsunade-sama?"
"Tsunade-sama!!"
"Wake up, please, Tsunade-sama!!!"
"NoooOO!!"
Sadly for her, those dirty words— words unbecoming of a princess— were the last she heard from her master's mouth.
When she shouted at the huge-boobed Senju to wake up, the latter exhaled her last breath. The silhouette, the scent of a massive dick, and smelly balls were in her mind. She wished she had tasted at least once the thought-paralyzing lollipop...It would have happened if not for her grandmother and some incestual inhibitions.
Sadly the owner of that dick, her own brother, died before she could ever decide to be honest with herself.
XX
Tsunade died. Not at a tender age like the brother she could never forget about, but at 95.
The woman lived her life long enough. She indulged in all kinds of pleasures and sins with drinks, expensive foods, gambling, fighting, and fighting again...before and after she was cured of her blood phobia.
Something she never tried or tasted was cock.
Funny when she sounded like a whore with experience to Shizune seconds before…
The thing was, Tsunade had seen Jiraiya's penis. She had all the time to see it in decades. Especially when she regularly caught him jerking off while peeking at her bathing...
She also had heard about Dan's size from his ex-lovers.
Yes, Kunoichis weren't silent concerning this type of stuff. And they shared every bit of information concerning their lovers whenever they weren't too busy on the battlefields. Doing only god knows what at night.
The best time to talk about cock size and manhood was during the war. This was probably one of the best stress relievers, even to the virgin Tsunade.
Well…Virgin, she wasn't scientifically speaking. Due to how much she trained, she had long since broken her hymen at 14.
She just never had a cock to wreck her guts. Something she naturally craved like other women yet deemed only her brother was manly enough to do.
Dan died before she reluctantly thought about giving him a view, not even a taste of her pink flower.
The reason she cried so much those years was also because of guilt.
The Senju princess never regretted being incestuous-minded…That thing, that monster, she could never forget…
…But she felt sorry for Dan. After all, she loved him even if she didn't want the microscopic tool he was rumored to hide in his black pants.
She never verified what his ex said, but she didn't care either. Dan wasn't exactly oozing manly confidence, and the length of his fingers and feet seemed to confirm what that Inuzuka Kunoichi claimed.
He was just charming and handsome enough for her to kiss him.
Kisses…That she wasn't a virgin...And Dan didn't get her first…
Recalling some shameful and immorally-deceitful things Tsunade told and did with her brother— to withstand the temptation of raping him in the bathhouse— she scowled. Suddenly…Thinking out loud:
"Wait…Am I alive?!!!"
"You definitely are…You stupid lass." A voice Tsunade would never forget said.
"Did you go again and drink too much yesterday despite my warnings?" That was her grandmother Mito speaking with an angry yet worried tone.
XX
Somewhere on Earth,
A young man working in the erotic gaming field was returning home. He was totally exhausted after his long day.
Though he was a pervert and worked the pervert field, thanks to a relative— his debt-ridden dad— he never did anything except lay whores. He never had a girlfriend.
As for love, he didn't believe in it.
Getting himself a beer in his fridge, the man sat on a chair. And on his desk, he began to count the money overdue at the end of the week.
"I'm good this week…" Smiling and sighing, the young man, one of 23 years, thought.
All his money, hard-earned, went into those expenses. Expenses which had to do with his father being a drinking and gambling wreck.
He could also thank his mother for running…
"... Let's put in some work, then,"
The work the young man was speaking of, one he did at home, was one allowing him to relax. To him, his activities were anything but boring.
What he couldn't handle was having to give away his livelihood. Just for being born in the wrong household.
Working on a game called dream paradox, some fandom-driven life simulator he wanted to fix and add erotic elements to, the young man slowly unwinded from all the stress. Last night he fell into a deep and thought-stirring sleep while watching Naruto and didn't have time to complete it.
XX
*Fap, fap*
*Lotion sounds*
"Eyy...Shizune with improved and fat knockers isn't bad...But there's only Tsunade for me, after all..."
"...I wish I could fuck her, bro..."
"...I would gladly believe in love just to get a chance..."
The young man worked all night on his latest and most delinquent project when he started rubbing one and said.
Doing the nasty and speaking nonsense making him hard, he didn't forget the main nature of his project—which wasn't his personal masturbation...
He wouldn't take credit for that project, but he didn't care.
This was just how the world worked. Those at the bottom of the food chain had to work for those at the top…Though he would get no money, he would get enjoyment and a chance to prove himself again at the tactless and merciless place he worked.
Genius…Depraved genius...There were myriad like him, yet he was the corporally and daddily-enslaved type.
…Wishing he was born in the world he was working on, a world he borrowed from a godly expert, he soon fell asleep...and died of causes that'd never matter, or he'd ever know.
XX
(A/N: bNb= Before Naruto's birth, aNb= After Naruto's birth)
XX
1st January to 31st December 17 bNb,
August,
Three years and some months before the start of the Second Shinobi War,
..
Senju Clan, 3AM
In the morning night,
At that moment, the 21-year-old Tsunade (biologically speaking) didn't think that her 8-year-old brother— still in the academy and about to celebrate his 9th birthday in a few days— was questioning his reality.
She was doing the same thing.
Another thing she couldn't think— another thing she would never question: whether her brother was her brother anymore.
He wasn't...
...And it was a concealed yet fun fact that would forever let her feel unexplored joys. Not just her, sadly...
"Where am I?" His mind far from filled with incestual needs, lewd contingencies, and carelessly-scheduled clan resurgence; when he came to, the young man questioned out loud.
"Where is this place?" When he wondered, he gawked at stately, palatial surroundings.
The style of the spot— an unadorned bedroom— wasn't western, and there were no items such as baldachins nobles from his past life would have. But it was definitely moneyed, affluent, and most of all refined.
"Why am I in bed? And why is there a freaking tatami? Is this Japan?" Unable to recognize his studio, a studio with a desk and seat— where he dozed off— he was uneasy.
"...That thing feels so smooth to the touch, though..." Bewildered, he who darted at a tall, light brown cupboard momentarily skimmed and then properly felt the green flooring with his hand.
"...Someone rich must reside here...But if that's the case...How did I land here?"
"Hmm?" The young man was getting lost in the opulence for a second when he finally paid attention to his hand.
"Wait...Why is it so small?!" Stunned, he scowled and exclaimed.
He was about to exit the futon bed, futon bedsheets, stand and walk towards a sizable, soaring, and movable mirror in the room's corner. But he stopped in his tracks when he was raising his butt...A butt smaller than he recalled.
Suddenly struck by remembrances and recollections, he paused for a few seconds, his gaze going from stunned, haggard, lost, to shocked...In an uncontained yet unsystematic occurrence.
He who strongly recalled a prior and mundane identity moments before suddenly yelled a name—with deja-vu-like and paradoxically bloated intimacy:
"Am I Senju Nawaki?!"
"...Are you for real?!"
"...This is Naruto?!"
When he began feeling dandy and awesome at the irrational yet amazing possibility, the young man— now Nawaki— didn't understand the sensationalistic secret behind his eccentric reality change...A second one...
...But he would never care because he believed in second chances and some of that karma stuff...The good parts...
"...Wait, what's that other thing in the corner?" Feeling the presence of something besides the memories in his new head, in a remote and inconspicuous corner, Nawaki squinted curiously.
"Could this be..."
XX
"...If it's really transmigration, which I can only accept unless I suddenly go back, this should be the cheat everyone writes and dreams about…."
"...But…"
"...This couldn't be what I was coding earlier back in the room, could it? This would be absurd, right?"
"...Except if… I'm a god?"
Nawaki muttered to himself, knitting his brows.
"..."
Recalling transmigration laws and rules, however, he began to think instead of muttering.
'I should be in my own life simulation game…If it's one…'
'...But I doubt I'm a god…If I was one, would I die?'
Nawaki chuckled, thinking this. His thoughts continued to move.
'…So…There should only be one explanation….'
'...I really transmigrated…And this world is real…'
'...To me, at least it is…'
When he thought that, Nawaki recalled some theories about reality being a dream.
…Maybe some higher AI or computer was dreaming everyone in a futuristic world. And the reality everyone thought was everything would end when the computer gets smashed or unplugged…
'...If it's how it is, should I be happy to skip the famous transmigration ceremony with the ROB?'
'...Hmm… let's not cry over spilled milk. I'm in freaking Naruto…As a rich prince…'
'...I should examine this cheat first…It sounds slightly different from what I had yet to finish coding, though….'
'...How do you even open it? Let's see…'
Accepting his new identity and wealthy status— with discomforting thrill— plus a cheat he wanted to examine, Nawaki thought.
It didn't take him long to adjust to many things and new thoughts…Or to forget his stupid father's debts...
…Getting a raw feel of the cheat, he opened the famous transmigration window sometime later.
XX
'...Bro, where does this all come from?'
'...Also, did that guy actually have the wood release?'
'...I don't remember putting that ability in his character slot...'
Looking at the cheat of his own coding and design yet at abilities that he didn't recall putting in the game, Nawaki's mind was muddled.
…Another thing that confused him was that only one of his abilities had a level...
...It was especially odd when he didn't recall including a leveling feature for anybody in the simulation.
[Status: Nawaki]
[Jobs: Shinobi, Playboy (Lvl.1)]
[Unique traits: Wood release, Lustful Ninja, Morning wood, Wooden armor, Wooden stabs]
He took a last and long glance at everything before clicking on the skills. Starting from the one he was most curious about.
[Playboy (Lvl.1): The playboy is a natural-born womanizer who trains thanks to and can choose to strengthen his love partners.]
[Shinobi: The Shinobi is an assassin, a ninja specializing in jutsus.]
[Wood release: A bloodline limit of the wood element.]
[Lustful ninja: The lustful ninja is a perverted shinobi who possesses great talent in pervert, covert, and hidden behaviors.]
[Morning wood: A hardening and elongating sexual technique using wood vitality to give powerful orgasms to women. More if they have yang or wood affinity.]
[Wooden armor: A flesh, skin, and bones hardening technique. Increases defense when used.]
[Wooden stabs: A limb, finger, and toes hardening technique. Increases offense when used.]
"..." Watching his skills a little numbly due to all the surprise, Nawaki had no idea that his new sister was going through a comparable strange experience.
XX
Experiencing the oddest phenomenon she ever did— odder than the eternal Tsukuyomi Madara put her and everyone else in decades before— Tsunade made findings. Post-death ones.
She felt head and intestinal aches, probably due to the hangover her grandma mentioned. So she most likely wasn't dreaming…As irrational as it sounded...
...Wild instincts and seasoned, proven intuitions screamed at her that she had either traveled back through time or reincarnated in some parallel reality.
Secondly, floating, transparent-blue windows in front of her grandmother's diamond-tattooed forehead reminded her that she was undergoing something she couldn't understand. Not with her current knowledge.
[Status: Mito]
[Jobs: Kunoichi, Sealmaster]
[Unique traits: Adamantine chains, Mind's eye of the kagura, Negative emotions sensing]
[Strengths: Sealing, Barrier ninjutsu, Chakra, Taijutsu, Perception, Movement]
Overall...This was a stranger, a more incomprehensible incident than anything she had lived through, seen, or heard of.
Which was view-refreshing considering she lived 95 years.
Yet it was also alarming...
...Especially when she couldn't remember something...
Something she felt like she was forgetting...
*Ding, Ding, Ding, Ding*
"Hiiii!!!" Hearing bell-like sounds, Tsunade jumped out of bed.
Done shaking something, Mito asked, scowling, "Tsunade? What's wrong?"
The old woman was holding a gold-colored bell in her hand. In the family, they used it to call upon servants stationed in the corridors outside the rooms.
"Eh?"
Frightened a moment ago, for a reason she couldn't tell, Tsunade widened her eyes. Then she asked:
"Grandma, what are you doing with the bell? Put it down, please…"
"Hmm?" Mito was confused.
Looking at the bell as if she was looking at an old and nice friend, her gaze returned to her granddaughter.
When it did, she asked strangely, "You lass, how much did you drink? Does this give you head pains too? I was just about to ask for some lukewarm water for you…."
"...You need to drink a lot of it in your state."
"!!" Hearing the suffix *warm* and the word *water*, Tsunade winced again.
She didn't know why she was acting like this. But, besides her already unamusing alcoholic intoxication, her current behavior worried Mito.
XX
Unaware that his big-titted sister was developing a phobia of bells, bell-like sounds, and warm water— until she thinks of healing herself with skills she had no clue she was gifted with— Nawaki walked.
Uncaring and happy.
Since the situation was already like this, he was getting himself a nice tour of the Senju house.
It was very late at night or early in the morning. On his way around the Senju complex, Nawaki met no one except servants and night-shift guards.
He was acquainted with those, so he said hello a few times.
One of them, a nosy one, said politely to him:
"Nawaki-sama, it's very late. Aren't you going to sleep?"
[Status: Bungarama]
[Jobs: Shinobi]
[Unique traits: None]
[Strengths: Chakra, Kenjutsu]
Staring at the man's details, Nawaki, who had noticed how he could examine people's details earlier, replied:
"I felt like the night was pretty, so I took a walk, Bungarama."
"Oh…You remember my name, Nawaki-sama?" The guard, Bungarama, a Senju swordsman with pale blond hair, said.
He was a whole adult chest taller than the eight-year-old Nawaki.
"Of course, I remember the name of everyone in the clan…." Acting like a man of wisdom, Nawaki said. Adding, "Keep this a secret, but I remember even better the women…."
"Eh? Hahaha, as expected of Nawaki-sama. You're only eight, but you're already interested in such things, aren't you?" The guard's eyes went wide for a moment before he laughed and remarked.
He and Nawaki were simple acquaintances before tonight, but now he felt a little close to this young clan prince.
"You're not married yet, are you, Bungarama? How old are you this year?" Nawaki, who was bored, asked.
"No, I'm not very handsome or competent. I have yet to be fortunate and meet somebody who will take me for who I am, Nawaki-sama. I'll be 27 in a few months to your other query." Bungarama scratched his back head and said. He didn't look too proud saying.
"Don't you feel socially awkward? At your age, people in our clan go at it like rabbits, you know?" Nawaki picked his nose, saying.
"Well, to be quite frank, if you allow me to say, Nawaki-sama, you just asked me about marriage…." Bungarama's face changed when he said. He didn't feel gauche talking about such a subject with the eight-year-old Nawaki.
Nawaki recalled that in this world, as long as kids showed interest in this matter, elders would oblige and teach them…Well, not teach directly…
"Ohh??" Nawaki, interested in Bungarama, now said, "How many, then?"
When Bungarama leaned down to whisper something in Nawaki's ear, a voice very close and behind them said:
"What are you doing here at this hour, Nawaki?"
"Hmm?" Turning his head with Bungarama, Nawaki looked at the newcomer.
Knitting his brows as if recalling someone with less ease than normal, he finally said:
"Auntie Tamatsu?"
XX
"What are you doing outdoors at this hour? Not sleeping? It's three in the morning…." Tamatsu, a swordswoman with features oddly similar to Tsunade's— such as large breasts and healthy-pointing nipples— asked. Disregarding Nawaki's surprise in the process.
She was built like the boy's sister from top to bottom, back to front. Except she was evidently older than Tsunade should be now. But her hair, spiky hair, was short, unlike most Kunoichis.
She would be the perfect copy of Mitsuki Bakugo if her eyes were red.
Gazing at the beautiful, stunning middle-aged woman before him, Nawaki replied, "Yes, I couldn't sleep, so I decided to have a stroll…." Done saying, he asked with the same suspicion and curiosity she showed, "But, what about you Auntie? What are you up to?"
When he did, this time, he scanned more than her captivating yet outward details…
[Status: Tamatsu]
[Jobs: Kunoichi]
[Unique traits: None]
[Strengths: Chakra, Kenjutsu, Movement, Defense, Ninjutsu]
Compared to Bungarama, she had more strengths. She also displayed an attribute Nawaki hadn't seen in any Senju thus far during the stroll: [Defense].
"Did you forget my job already?" Tamatsu peered at her nephew strangely and asked.
"Right…" Suddenly digging out a memory— one not very relevant and which he had yet to properly digest— Nawaki replied, "... You're monitoring the night guards."
"Yes." Tamatsu chuckled and answered. Smiling for the first time since earlier. After she did, she took a short, meaningful peek at the now faint and nervous guard behind Nawaki's shoulder.
"..."
...Nawaki was surprised to see him zealous in his duties and stationary, almost like a Saint James queen's guard now, his eyes passing over the distance and surroundings...
Her extended glance at the guard done, Tamatsu turned her face. Then she asked, "...And speaking of underlings that I monitor attentively, can I ask what you were doing with this young fella? Didn't you say you were going for a walk?"
"I was walking," Nawaki stated with an unflinching countenance, although not like Bungarama's. Continuing, "That was until I met Bungarama. He's polite and friendly; you didn't have to scare him like this, auntie."
"Was he?" Tamatsu said, but it didn't look like she cared. "What were you talking about?"
"..." Bungarama's face grew pale when he heard.
Taking a quick look behind him, Nawaki chuckled inside. That guy worried over nothing.
Turning his face at his aunt, an aunt he planned to get to know more— Not relying on the memories— he said:
"Things that stay between us men, auntie. You shouldn't worry about this..."
"...What things?" It probably wasn't her intention, but when Tamatsu asked, her face lightly reddened. Nawaki recalled that she was still unwed at her age.
Speaking of that age, she didn't look it, but the woman was in her early forties.
"Nice things." Nawaki smiled a little pervertedly when he said.
"Bungarama! What did you teach Nawaki?!" Hearing and seeing her nephew's face, Tamatsu yelled.
"...That, it was like this..."
When Bungarama started stuttering, Nawaki interrupted:
"Auntie, I asked. You shouldn't blame an innocent man..."
"Did you?" Stunned, Tamatsu uttered.
"Yes...I want to talk to you about something else. But that's only if you promise not to bully this guy. He's my friend, okay?" Nawaki grabbed his aunt's hand and said.
By now, he recalled from which Senju line she was from. She was descending from one of Butsuma Senju's cousins. In simple words, she was Hashirama's and Tobirama's distant niece.
However...Incest was a thing in the clan, so she and Nawaki's genuine blood relations were a little more complicated.
XX
Elsewhere,
Tsunade was in an upbeat yet fluctuating mood.
Not just because of new and strange phobias.
Her head and belly aching because of booze only her past self should have enjoyed— after Mito fled back to sleep when she hugged her too much— Tsunade looked at floating windows again.
Windows of her own now...
Alien to the transparent, bothering, and hovering box, she wondered.
[Status: Tsunade]
[Jobs: Kunoichi, Medic, Quack (Lvl.1)]
[Unique traits: Quack release, Drunken fist, Drunken meditation, Gambling heal, Deadly acupuncture]
'Quack? What's all this?"
"...Should it be someone's prank?'
'...Also, why is that strengths box missing?'
'...Does it mean I don't have any strengths?'
'...My body is young now, but I was never so weak, was I? It shouldn't be...'
"..."
When she began to question fruitlessly what that [Lvl.1] stuff meant— without thinking of clicking— she recalled something she had asked her grandma.
"Hmfff..." Tsunade exhaled a long sigh and stood out of her bedsheets.
Unable to resist the urge to wake up her brother a minute longer, she walked out of her room.
XX
"Where are you leading me, Nawaki? Did you find anything fishy around here?" Tamatsu asked her nephew. They were on their way to a remote and empty storage house.
"...No, I just want to ask you something important, somewhere quiet." They arrived when Nawaki let go of her warm, soft hand to reply.
He and the beautiful blonde swordswoman of 40+years stood alone, next to a well, when she inquired gently and curiously:
"Is this a good place? What did you want to talk about?"
Nawaki didn't beat around the bush to say:
"Auntie, do you know anyone in the clan with the wood release?"
"Of course not. Why?" Tamatsu chuckled and replied. It was night, so her white and moonlit smile was especially mesmerizing.
Looking at his aunt's amazing teeth, Nawaki recalled how there were toothpaste and toothbrushes in this world— A strange world too advanced in some ways and underdeveloped in others.
Stopping himself from wondering how people brushed their teeth and fought tooth bacteria and tooth cavities in the past, he said:
"What would happen if someone had it?"
"The wood release?" Tamatsu frowned.
Nawaki nodded.
"Nothing much," Tamatsu shrugged and said. "Unless their wood release was as powerful as Hashirama-sama's." Then she continued with an inquisitive frown, "Why do you ask me all this, though? You don't happen to think you have it, do you?"
Unsure whether he should tell his aunt before his sister and grandma, Nawaki said childishly:
"I was just asking. If I'm lucky, grandfather may bless me before I turn nine."
"..." Tamatsu looked amused and delighted when she approached him, stroked his small head gently, and remarked, "...Alright, Nawaki, I wish you can obtain the wood release before your birthday too. If not before, after…"
"...But in the meantime, you should be a good kid and try to go back to sleep. Okay?"
".. It's getting late, and you must attend school in hours. You're the Senju prince. You don't want to snooze during class and get teased by your classmates and prospective peers, do you?"
Hearing the politely-worded yet educative remarks, Nawaki responded. "No, auntie. I'll go back."
When he heeded her wise words, and before he obediently walked back to the main house, the woman gave him a goodnight kiss on the cheek— one with a very nice smell and grown-up body scent.
The boy he was, a bit of a pervert and a playboy, identified those as soap, perfume, and his aunt's pheromones.
Smirking because he made another find— one related to the woman's hormones, and thanks to a job properly blending with him now— Nawaki returned home.
XX
The Senju personal residences, especially the main house, were built a lot like Japanese hot springs,
When Nawaki greeted the two young maids at his door, planning to open his room, he heard a deep womanly voice—One oddly sensual.
It came from the dark, spacious, turfy, and graveled courtyard behind him:
"Where were you, Nawaki? I was starting to worry if not for the maids around here reiterating how you went out for a short walk..."
"...Young man, did you check the time before going for a night stroll?"
Recognizing the voice, Nawaki, who looked toward his room doors, flinched. From excitement.
When he turned to get a first look at the legendary sister he had yet to meet— and which he was a simp of— he was dumbfounded to see her weeping and smiling simultaneously.
XX
When Nawaki returned to his room, planning to get some sleep, he didn't expect to find his sister.
Because it was the case, he didn't think to study her details first when he asked in concern and worry:
"Sorry but… What's wrong, Tsunade? Why are you sitting and crying alone over there?"
"Hmm?" Tsunade suddenly frowned.
Seeing his sister's next change of expression, Nawaki asked with renewed confusion:
"What's wrong? Aren't you going to tell me?"
"..." Tsunade stood in silence, her face strange. She walked toward him and said, "Tell your maids to leave us. I want to talk to you alone inside."
Nawaki sighed, turned to his maids, and said, "You two leave. You heard her."
"Yes, Nawaki-sama." The young maids, two young Senjus said. In the next instance, they walked away far in the brown, wood-floored, open corridor.
XX
Inside Nawaki's room,
"You're acting strange tonight… What's up?" Nawaki remarked. He and his sister sat in front of each other. Very very close…
…And she gave him a long, intense, and strong bear hug.
If not for curiosity and concern, Nawaki didn't mind at all…
Unbothered by the alcoholic scent he could easily discern and pick up, he was enjoying her lovely and womanly smell.
…Even better, the boy was immersed in the feeling of her big, plump breasts bobbing, bouncing on his chest….
"Give me another minute…Just another one…" Tsunade replied.
"..." Nawaki was greatly perplexed, but he didn't speak back. Though he was now familiar with the memories, there were perhaps things he didn't know or couldn't ask.
Tsunade was hugging him affectionately, but doing that, she acted weirdly sad.
She was sobbing with her head resting on his left shoulder—Some tears he didn't understand poured down on that same shoulder every now and then.
He and Tsunade hugged like that for a moment, her sobs shaking and moving their yet-to-be sexually entwined bodies…
…When Nawaki's thoughts went in a perverted direction, Tsunade finally let go of him.
With a slightly embarrassed smile, she wiped her teary eyes before saying:
"...Nawaki, by any chance, do you see windows on people's foreheads? Transparent-blue ones with text inside…."
Nawaki was a Tsunade simp.
He was extremely shocked at her sudden and unexpected question.
But because he was what he was, he didn't think more than two seconds before exclaiming:
"What?! You too?!"
XX
Nawaki was a gamer and a game designer.
The situation in his room turned a little melodramatic and theatrical, a little bit too Oriental for some of the game-making tastes and flavors he studied before dying...
...Wait, this wasn't death...He was about to forget that he didn't die...He had just Isekaied...
...Tactical retreats...minute-lasting trials...bitter yet happiness-driven lies…the boy was compelled to use, go through, and tell many to Tsunade...
...That—all because he didn't want to blow his random, unplanned, but far from undesirable cover...
...He was doing it all for boobs and nipples...And his rekindled, promising-looking identity...
Between him finding out that the PLAYER 2 feature he didn't complete was apparently finalized by whichever hardworking Isekai-ROB— whichever one threw him for an otherworldly loop— Tsunade asking him questions about when he got the strange windows, why they were getting it, what the windows were, and if he knew anyone else having those— plus questions about his new, noticeable wood release and lascivious-sounding skills— About nine to ten minutes passed by,
XX
The windows popped up each time Tsunade walked by or passed by someone on her way to Nawaki's room.
After Nawaki taught her how to stop that from happening, how to open, read, and close the windows, she was finally planning to get back to her room.
That, however, was not before she reminded him:
"Nawaki, besides grandma and me, you shouldn't tell anyone about this ability. It should be something above bloodline limits if I'm right…."
"Alright, Tsuna," Nawaki said obediently, using a nickname he recalled—One invented by their granddad. "I need to go to sleep now."
"Okay." Tsunade smiled and said. After giving him a smooch on his face, sadly not on his mouth, she said, "Don't be late for school tomorrow. I'll wake you up."
"I think you're a little too drunk to do that," Nawaki said. "You're in for a deep sleep."
"Hehe," Tsunade chuckled evilly and replied, "That is if I go to sleep. I don't think I will."

You are reading story Naruto AU: The Smut And The Healer at novel35.com

"What are you going to do?" Nawaki asked curiously.
"I'll probably read." His sister answered with a shrug. Opening the door and leaving the room, she said, "Good night."
"Good night, Tsuna." Nawaki stood and said, planning to ask his maids for some cold water before heading back to bed.
He was thirsty. Not just one way…
XX
4AM,
...In Nawaki's old life, he called that hour demon time.
Talking about the new identity, though...
...School days were long, boring, and ended late, but he had to get to class at 10 in the morning,
The lights in the latter's room were finally off,
Resting in his futon, he stared at the dark open space. To be precise, at transparent-blue, thin-air floating windows that he had yet to close.
Those belonged to Tsunade.
[Status: Tsunade]
[Jobs: Kunoichi, Medic, Quack (Lvl.1)]
[Unique traits: Quack release, Drunken fist, Drunken meditation, Gambling heal, Deadly acupuncture]
[Quack (Lvl.1): The quack is considered a heretic, a shameless medical student. But he is a misunderstood expert— Not only in one field or genre.]
[Quack release: A comical, savage, and drunk bloodline limit. The bloodline limit of the natural-born quack.]
XX
Hours later,
"Good morning Nawaki; time to get up!"
With the sound of his door getting shoved open with emphasis, Nawaki heard a woman with a deep, eargasmic voice say cheerfully.
"Hmm...Ah, good morning, Tsuna. What time is it?" Nawaki raised his chest from the futon and said, rubbing his eyes.
When he yawned, Tsunade, who stood at the door, told:
"It's 8. Should I have woken you up later?"
"No, it's okay." The boy shook his head and replied. "Did you stay up all night? Let's go and get breakfast together."
"I sure did..."
"...Alright, let's go and get us some breakfast," Tsunade answered, smiling.
Staring at her, Nawaki didn't think she looked tired or drunk. She probably got better while she read like she said she would.
XX
"Grandma, you're up. Good morning."
"Good morning, grandma."
When Tsunade and Nawaki arrived in a large kitchen, they found Mito speaking with the cooking and cleaning maids. Asking them questions or ordering them around like she usually would each morning.
"Tsunade-sama, Nawaki-sama…"
One after the other, the maids greeted before Mito replied:
"Good morning, kids. What do you want to eat?"
Contrary to her strict, refined appearance, Mito wasn't formal with her speech.
…Well, at least at home and with people she knew well.
Nawaki wasn't surprised to hear his grandmother's casual greeting. In fact, with him and Tsunade, she was the least formal.
"I'm going to have fried eggs and sausage, grandma." Nawaki was quick to say.
"How many of each?" Mito asked. She liked to feed her grandkids a lot.
"Four eggs, with grilled sausage and a tomato, please," Nawaki said, hungry and impatient to eat.
"What about you, Tsunade?" Mito turned and asked.
"I'm just going to have some coffee. You know how much I had to drink…." Tsunade replied.
"This is why you should stop drinking," Mito remarked. "You could end up dieting every morning at this rate."
"I'll try." Tsunade surprised everyone, the nosy maids included, when she replied.
Looking at her with a dismayed face, Mito asked:
"What did you say?"
"I'll try to cut down the drinking, grandma. It's no big deal." Tsunade said again, going somewhere in the kitchen.
She clutched a coffee machine when Mito looked at Nawaki and asked, "Did I hear that right?"
"I think you did, grandma…I heard the same thing." Nawaki shrugged and said.
"...This is weird," Mito said, squinting askance at Tsunade's back.
XX
Nawaki was devouring his salty eggs with some bread. His grandma happily watched him, giving him more bread when he emptied what was on his plate.
He, Tsunade, and Mito were sitting over breakfast together in their favorite lunch room when Tsunade said:
"Grandma, I want to talk to you about something. Tonight and with Nawaki when he returns from school."
"With Nawaki? What about? It sounds serious." Mito looked at Tsunade and said.
Nawaki didn't stop eating when he stared at Tsunade too.
"It's about Nawaki and I…" Tsunade said. For some reason blushing when she did.
XX
Everyone from the big, magnificent, and also extended Senju family was a freak. Some energetic customs even started from the Uzumaki branch.
Mito, who had a great morning secret, helped Nawaki dress up in his room. She couldn't wait for him to go to school.
"What are you going to wear today?" Mito asked her grandson. Trying not to show her impatience.
"Same old, I guess," Nawaki said; the next moment, he grabbed light-green clothes from his dresser.
"You like this attire too much, Nawaki." Impatient for her grandson to leave, Mito, however, said.
"It's either this or the black one," Nawaki replied. "You don't like me wearing dark clothes, though."
"Well, children shouldn't wear dark colors," Mito remarked. The next moment she walked toward Nawaki, saying, "Okay, change your clothes quickly. You must show the example and get to class before your classmates do."
XX
Nawaki didn't retort when Mito spoke.
He knew how much his grandma liked to hear from the teachers that he was a model student.
Despite how casual she could be, the woman was old-fashioned at heart. Him arriving at school early was the minimum he could do.
Mito was helping him undress when his pajama pants suddenly fell down, and she exclaimed:
"Great lord! Nawaki! What is that?!"
"What?" Nawaki asked, confused.
"T-this…" Mito had a hand on her mouth and the other pointing between Nawaki's legs when she stuttered. Her face flushed like the boy had never seen.
"Hmm?" Nawaki looked at his penis and said, "You mean this?"
"Y-yes…" Mito stood. Flustered, she coughed and said, "...It definitely wasn't so big the last time I helped you…What happened?"
Understanding the situation, Nawaki grinned and said, "Guess I'm growing up faster than we thought, grandma, hehe. My birthday is round the corner, remember?"
"..." Mito kept quiet, her eyes unwillingly glued to the ridiculously large and long penis between Nawaki's legs.
After a few fast blinks, she coughed again and said:
"Alright, stop wasting time and dress up…."
"...Yes, grandma," Nawaki said obediently. Doing so, however, he couldn't help but think of something. Something very naughty and exciting.
XX
Twenty or so minutes later,
When Nawaki left for school, Mito went back to her room.
Exhaling a long sigh, she muttered to herself:
"This family is full of freaks…."
"...And I'm the first one…."
The old red-haired said, her eyes changing from their usual solemnity and stoicism. Her two hands and back on the door.
The next moment she walked further inside the big room.
Unfastening the ties around her red and white kimono-like clothes, when she was taking them off, she looked at a picture on a shelf.
Hesitating for a moment, she eventually couldn't resist rotating the picture with her hand. Thinking sinfully:
'Forgive me for what I'm about to do, Hashirama….'
XX
Mito didn't just have the looks; she was a ravishing, desolate old widow.
People could wonder if she felt lonely and sad.
...The truth was that she did…
Another thing that felt despairing and anguished was the spot between Mito's legs...
...Her old lively, strong but frustrated Uzumaki crotch— That hairy and stunningly ripe zone needed and had been missing important things for many years: Tender care and tumultuous love.
Like the name of her village, the village between the *Whirling Tides*, Mito was wild. She needed a storm to keep her spirits awake...a cruel squall to shake and invigorate her...
...Preferably one youthful.
And to properly fulfill her unwinding sexual fantasies, one loving, rough, and that bent things around it.
For years, that had been how Mito's been getting it down. By herself. Each morning.
Today, however, something she could never foreshadow...Something indirectly descending from her womb but which she was unprepared for...entered the picture. Sinfully and stiffly so...
That thing was her grandson's massive, incestuous, and thought-paralyzing penis.
Mito wasn't sure if dicks could grow so big in a month. She had only seen her husband's.
She also wasn't sure if 8-year-olds could enter puberty...Or why her grandson's thing was irresistibly adorable and scarily tempting at the same time...
The only sure, foolproof thing was that desire had already overwhelmed her lower body when she guiltily rotated her husband's picture...
"Mmmmph..."
The red-haired old widow slowly sighed and unwinded. Getting rid of any stockpiled stress in a long sigh...A mature and sexy moan...
When she started getting serious, Nawaki's picture in mind— aside from very little shame— she felt staggering exhilaration.
'I'm not hurting anybody, Hashirama, alright? I'm just jerking off...'
'...It's better if I jerk off to our grandson than Tsuna, isn't it?'
With her gentle, soft, experienced fingers over and inside her erogenous zones, Mito comforted herself. Thinking about another secret she always kept.
*Haaanh~~*
Minutes later, when the old widow was finally and entirely guilt-free, her body and legs arching, she convulsed and reached a climax. A wet and warm one.
Done enjoying herself, her face flushed, her breath hot and bated, she arranged her robes, smiled with embarrassment, thinking:
'Sorry, Hashirama, but I never felt so good...'
'...Maybe I should start teaching a few things to that boy lest he gets taken advantage of by the village's kunoichis...'
'...There are too many horny and desperate cougars in this village...More than in Uzu...'
'...Some of those licentious witches would probably resort to anything to get their hands on Nawaki's thing...'
Mito's old-fashioned thoughts turned delinquent and anxious when she cleaned the squirting juices spread over her floor.
Moments later, she went out of the room with the same solemn and refined bearing everyone knew.
XX
Konoha Academy,
The teacher had yet to come, and Nawaki sat in class with his friends.
Apart from a few children his age with civil backgrounds, those coming from Shinobi clans like him were Inoichi Yamanaka, Choza Akimichi, and Shikaku Nara.
In the memories, those three were also surprisingly his besties.
"Looks like the teacher is coming late again this morning. What a drag...If I knew, I would have slept in." A child with tanned skin, two scars on his face, and a pineapple-black haircut muttered. This was Shikaku Nara.
"Shikaku, how is it a drag? Everyone knows you don't like class. Also, you can still sleep in the meantime..." Inoichi said. He was a child with long, spiky, ash blond hair reaching his lower back. He wore that hair in a long ponytail. Other noticeable things about him were his light green eyes and strong facial features, which included a well-defined, husky jawline.
No matter how Nawaki looked at him, he only had a child's body. His face looked already middle-aged.
The red-haired, chubby Choza was eating potato chips in silence when Shikaku scratched his head and replied unreasonably:
"...Forget it; I'm too lazy to try and sleep now."
"You...Are you really a genius?"
Seconds after Inoichi asked, frowning, the door opened, and a lady entered the room, making a nice announcement—one all the children liked.
Speaking of the lady, Nawaki still felt odd seeing her here, but he recognized her as Koharu Utatane. She was the school's current chairwoman.
XX
"Something unexpected happened, children. Your homeroom and substitute teachers are all on special leave today…."
When the chairwoman announced, the children cheered.
"Don't cheer early. You can go home now, but you'll have a written and field test tomorrow." When Koharu added, the previously excited children now turned downcast.
Before they could ask any questions, she turned her face. Looking at a student— which Nawaki surprisingly identified to be him— she said:
"Nawaki Senju, come with me."
"Me? What's wrong, Utatane-sama?" Nawaki knew the black-haired and middle-aged woman. She had come to the Senju clan for lunch or dinner several times with Hiruzen.
Usually, behind doors, he would refer to her as Koharu-san since she didn't like to be called grandma or auntie.
But in public, he called her Utatane-sama or chairwoman like everybody else. She wasn't just the school director. She was also the Hokage's advisor.
Though Nawaki's identity was great and royal, his status wasn't above the village and village codes.
"Just come with me," Koharu said. The next moment she walked out.
"Nawaki, have you done something bad?" Inoichi asked.
When he did, Shikkaku and the rest of their classmates stared at the Senju curiously.
"Not that I know of...See you later, guys." Nawaki said and stood up.
XX
The still young and beautiful Koharu led Nawaki outside the academy before turning and saying:
"This stays between us, but the class was canceled because of you."
"Really? Why?" Nawaki was astonished.
"I need to get you to the Hokage building. You'll know once we get there." Koharu said.
'Hokage building?' Nawaki was shocked when he heard.
XX
At the same time, Inside the Hokage office,
Tsunade, who had come from the future, came with all sorts of memories and opinions.
One person she was very wary of and wanted to put in jail directly was Danzo. But without proof, she couldn't expose him.
Something told her to kill him secretly, but she had to get her Yin seal first. Even with the new abilities she strangely was reborn with, she wasn't confident of not making a mess.
Her mind was powerful, but her body was her 21-year-old body. She had to train a lot to get back to her old peak.
Looking at the teacher she both missed, loved, but also despised a little, Tsunade said:
"Sensei, I don't want to discuss my request...I'm not asking you things very often..."
"...Please graduate Nawaki immediately."
Tsunade wanted Nawaki to graduate so she could be his jonin sensei. There was no way she would leave him in the hands of Orochimaru this time.
XX
Hiruzen wasn't sure what was going on with Tsunade today, but he answered:
"...Tsunade, your brother is coming over with Koharu."
"Let's at least give him a test before we make any hasty decision, shall we?"
"Graduating at eight is unheard of….Furthermore, we don't even know if he wants to graduate..."
Hiruzen didn't care too much about Tsunade's request. In fact, he was glad that she finally decided to work harder and contribute to the village her way, like Orochimaru and Jiraiya did.
But Hiruzen first needed to make sure whether the child was talented.
He was the Hokage, he needed to look at the big picture all the time, and he couldn't waste Tsunade's time and talent on anybody…Especially for years.
That applied to Nawaki too.
At eight, it was difficult to tell how young Shinobis would evolve...But the child was neither a talent nor a great genius the last time he watched him.
XX
Minutes later,
Nawaki finally arrived at the Hokage office with Koharu.
After he greeted the Hokage and his sister, which he was very surprised but not dumbfounded to find here, he said:
"Grandpa Third, why did you summon me?"
In private, Nawaki called Hiruzen in many affectionate ways, such as grandpa Hiruzen, grandpa Hokage, grandpa third, etc.
Hiruzen was barely middle-aged, but he liked being called that way, unlike Koharu...Nawaki had to say men were different.
In the memories, the most used nickname was this last one. Grandpa Third. That despite Mito often reminding Hiruzen how shameless he was.
Hiruzen was older than Tsunade and Nawaki's deceased parents but not that much.
The man just loved seniority in general...
Anyway, the 8-year-old boy liked that nickname because it reminded him how Hashirama and Tobirama came before the Sarutobi.
…Obviously, the Senju prince he was was very proud of his identity. And he wanted to become Hokage too…
Hokage, however, was something the new and mentally 23-year-old Nawaki gave no fucks about.
He was too selfish, too much of a pervert, and too much of an asshole to work for strangers.
When Nawaki recalled how he was a simp for his dad—Dad, which he was freed of and left along with all the family debts— Tsunade spoke:
"I want you to graduate from the academy, Nawaki. That's what I asked Sensei."
"...Also, I'm going to take care of you personally. As your jonin sensei."
'What?!' If Nawaki wasn't too stunned by Tsunade's promise to cut down on drinking this morning, now he was startled. Though not in a bad way.
When he was asking himself many questions, alarmed and curious, his grandpa Hokage said:
"Tsunade, I said not to be hasty… Let me evaluate Nawaki first."
"..." By now, if Nawaki didn't understand what was happening, he would be stupid.
Silently, as he listened to Hiruzen, Tsunade, and Koharu bickering closely, almost like family members, he thought:
'This is an AU, right? You thought you could fool me great ROB, but your opponent is me, the great DIO-sama!'
Thinking he'd found out why his sister was so different from her canonical version, Nawaki grinned stupidly.
Noticing his expression, Tsunade asked:
"Nawaki, why are you smiling so much?"
"...You want to graduate and have me as your sensei, right?"
XX
When Nawaki infected Tsunade with his smile, and she started grinning, Hiruzen sighed and thought:
'Look at these stupid siblings… It's almost as if they're in love….'
'Wait...If Nawaki can infect people with smiles like that, maybe he's also gifted with that mysterious smiling-Senju gene….'
Hiruzen was more of a joker than people thought. So were a lot of Sarutobis.
Recalling how his teacher the Second also smiled like Nawaki was doing now in private. And how dumb he could look around his brother the First sometimes, he made cringe internal jokes before asking:
"Nawaki, is what Tsunade is asking true? Do you really want to graduate?"
Hiruzen saw the boy nodding and saying:
"Yes, Grandpa Hokage."
'Strange, why is that boy calling me grandpa Hokage now?'
'...Did he finally decide to suck up to me?'
Hiruzen was also smarter than he liked to show.
Scoffing internally, and smiling, the next Second, he said:
"Let's have you graduate then."
"What about that test?" When Hiruzen said, Tsunade asked, frowning attentively.
"Forget about it; I'm in a good mood," Hiruzen replied.
"I'm giving you three months to make something out of Nawaki. At that time, I'll come to see his progress."
"If you idle around and waste your brother's time, I'm going to spank your ass, personally."
Hiruzen, who liked praise and sensible children, said. Nawaki looked very handsome right now…
Koharu, who saw everything, and understood, gave him a knowing smile…But Hiruzen didn't care; he was happy with this good boy Nawaki.
XX
Tsunade, who had complicated feelings for her teacher, mostly because of Danzo, was happily surprised.
Seeing how he was still the kind old man she knew, and who died for his sometimes soft choices and decisions, she said:
"I didn't misjudge you, old man."
"Old man?" Hiruzen was confused. "Call me Sensei."
Recalling that she wasn't supposed to call him that way yet, Tsunade gave a clumsy excuse for doing so and turned to her brother.
Watching him with the biggest smile, her tits bounced when she put her hands over her hips and said:
"Nawaki, you heard your grandpa. You're not going to regret this, are you?"
"I'm a lot stricter than I look. I won't go easy on you just because you're cute."
XX
At that moment,
Nawaki was too captivated by his sister's bouncing breasts and firm nipples to care about her cute-sounding warnings.
XX
…Once upon a time, in a forest, there lived a greedy lion. All the other animals were scared of him because he hunted every day and killed the animals in large numbers even when he was not hungry. They knew that soon, none of them and their children would be left alive.
The lion had many other forests which he could hunt from. They didn't understand why he liked theirs so much.
Anxious and hopeless, the animals met and decided to offer one animal to the lion daily. They went to the lion and said, "Your Majesty, please hear us out. We have a humble request. The rate at which you kill us, soon none of us will be left in the forest. We ask you to stay in your den always. Every day, we will send you one animal as your food. This way, you won't have to hunt for your food, and we, too, can survive."
The lion agreed, and from that day onward, one animal chosen to be sent to the lion would become his daily meal.
One day it was the turn of a young rabbit. This rabbit, however, was very resourceful and clever. He did not want to be eaten by the lion. He also wanted to get rid of the lion for some time, if not forever. He thought hard and came up with a plan to trick the lion.
On the day he was supposed to go to the lion, to become the lion's meal, he got up very late. Taking a long detour to think, he started walking slowly towards the lion's den. He even slept on the way, reaching the lion's den by sunset.
In the meantime, the lion had grown angry and impatient. When he saw the tiny rabbit coming toward him, he roared, "I have waited an entire day, and the animals send me this puny little rabbit! You are too small for a meal. I shall teach the animals a lesson. I will kill and eat them all with my wives!"
The rabbit remained calm and said, "Oh mighty lion, may I say something? The animals had sent a group of six rabbits for your meal. But on the way, another lion stopped us. He said that he was the new king of the forest. We told him that we already had a brave lion as our king. He kept the five rabbits with him and told me that I must leave the forest at once or he would slay me."
The lion, upon hearing this, became very furious. He asked the rabbit to take him to the new lion's den so that he could see which other lion was so courageous.
The rabbit agreed and led the lion to a deep well.
"He lives in that fortress, My Lord," said the rabbit to the lion when they arrived. The lion went to the well and looked inside. But what he saw was his own reflection in the water. Thinking he was tricked, he roared in anger.
But thankfully for the rabbit, the echo of the lion's voice made him assume it was the other reckless lion. He jumped inside the well to kill his new enemy. But sadly for him, his own enemy was his ignorance...
When he jumped, the lion's head crashed against the rocks, and he fell into the water and drowned.
...With a big and somewhat dark smile, a strange and green gleam in his eyes, the little rabbit rushed back to tell the other animals how he had saved the forest…
XX
Lunchtime, Somewhere in Konoha,
Upstairs in a luxurious and large tea salon,
Tsunade was stirring a cup of tea with a spoon when she told a very drunken and meditative tale to the boy listening.
That boy was her brother, Nawaki, who sat right next to her.
The salon where Nawaki and Tsunade sat didn't just serve tea. In fact, in the backside of the building, some…queer things went down.
Like many of her other wealthy possessions, it belonged to Mito and used to be managed by their mom.
Nawaki was digging into a roasted and wild piece of meat when he stopped.
Cleaning his mouth with a towel after listening to Tsunade's weird story, he asked her:
"Since when do you know how to tell stories so well? And why are you telling me this one?"
"Because rabbits are interesting animals," Tsunade said with a smile and drank her tea.
"Yes?" Nawaki said. "But what does that have to do with us?"
"Hehe…" Tsunade chuckled and put down the empty teacup. Then she said, "..This is where you're wrong."
"Really? How so?" Nawaki asked again.
"Finish eating, and I'm going to teach you something…." Tsunade replied and thought aloud, "...You seem to like wild boar, but I hope you have no bias against rabbits and genjutsu."
XX
Living for 95 years came with a few perks.
The reborn Tsunade had those.
Waiting for her brother to finish his meal, she ordered another cup of the bittersweet tea.
Looking at him eating with appetite, what she didn't tell him was something that didn't just have to do with her new meditative power…
Long after Naruto became Hokage, Tsunade learned that all living creatures could become sages. Even trees and plants…She just had no clue how to make that happen.
Sage mode wasn't easy, and Tsunade herself never learned it.
…Speaking of trees and plants—the wood release was so special because it was something alive…
Staring at the windows Nawaki taught her how to open, Tsunade smiled, thinking:
'... I'll watch over and teach Nawaki well in this new life.'
'He's awakened his wood release years earlier than in the last life...But I can't allow things to go wrong…'
'...If I must go against and kill thousands to protect him, so be it….'
[Drunken meditation: A drunk and sagely art. Both active and passive. Meditate over wisdom to heal from mental and physical discomforts. Connect to spiritual, summoning, and sage lands in and out of battle.]
[Drunken fist: A drunk and fighting art. One of the most brutal, misleading combat skills besides sage modes fighting techniques. Enhances perception and senses when used. Reach near-future sight when mastered.]
[Gambling heal: The witch doctor's favorite therapy and treatment technique—Both a healing and exorcism technique. Works better on tipsy, drugged, poisoned patients.]
XX
At the same time,
Koharu returned from the Shinobi academy for a second time to have lunch with Hiruzen in the Hokage building.
The two were talking about the academy courses and program when Koharu brought up what happened this morning with Tsunade.
"Hiruzen, you shouldn't worry. I think Tsunade will do a fine job as a jonin sensei…."
"...She may even take on other students in the future years after she's done teaching Nawaki…."
"... Don't you think that's a good thing for the village?"
"It is." Feeling pleased, Hiruzen ate the bento his wife Biwako made them with appetite.
He was using his chopsticks to grab yellow egg rolls when Koharu spoke again:
"Speaking of your students, what are Orochimaru and Jiraiya up to these days?"
Hiruzen ate a bite and munched slowly before telling:
"Those two are on a mission outside."
"What mission?" Koharu asked curiously.
"...Come on, Koharu." Hiruzen drank water. Then after a burp, with a faint smile, he cleaned his mouth, saying. "...You know the protocol. Even if you're my advisor, there's stuff I can't easily disclose."
"...You tell me all the non-important matters, though. It must be somewhat significant to the village if you're not saying anything." Koharu replied.
"Y-yes…Important." When Koharu said, Hiruzen's face turned strange for a moment.
Seeing him cough, blush, and circle his face to the other side the next instance, Koharu eyed him. Thinking secretly:
'...Did he send those two on some pervert errand again?'
'...Well, I just need to wait. It won't be long or hard to know if he did.'
XX
Koharu was young, but her duties were mostly executive. She wasn't extremely busy even as the Hokage's advisor or the academy chairwoman.
When she left the Hokage building, recalling the morning again, she felt like saying hi to someone she hadn't seen in a while.
That person was Mito-sama.
Arriving at the Senju clan, Koharu sat in a large living room after the maids went to announce her presence.
Before she was served tea and snacks, Mito-sama came out and welcomed her with a large smile:
"Welcome, Koharu."
"...You look good. To what do I owe the pleasure of your visit?"
XX
"Haha," Koharu giggled and replied flatteringly, "Stop overpraising me, Mito-sama; you're always doing a lot better than all of us,"
"Stop jesting, you little girl..." Mito sat and said with a growing smile. She and Koharu knew each other well, and the Uzumaki saw her grow up.
Mito knew Koharu always had a talent for sucking up to strong and influential people. And she didn't dislike that talent despite how she pretended to remain unmoved and modest.
The truth was that she was very satisfied with Koharu and treasured her and her visits. They always made her happy and sweetened her old mood.
Koharu continued instead of stopping. She said:
"...No, Not just me, Mito-sama..."
"...All the world's Kunoichis want to find out the secret behind your striking youth and beauty..."
"...Speaking of... I've had the privilege to visit Uzu quite a few times recently. Yet, nobody was as gorgeous, strong, or well-kept as you, Mito-sama….Not even out of your sisters and cousins..."
"...If you allow me to say more, you only look more stunning as time goes by..."
"...It shouldn't just be about being an Uzumaki, should it?"
...Here, Koharu smiled with curiosity when she praised Mito again. Then, rubbing her cheek with a worried face, she remarked:
"I also want to age like you, but my skin needs care, and time is cruel...Mito-sama, could you share your secrets with me?"
"...Just this once, please...I won't share them around..."
'Here it is...Hehe, this little girl doesn't change...' When Mito heard, she tittered inside and thought.
Though she loved Koharu, that little girl had always bugged her about this. Even back when she was a teen.
Kunoichis were too precocious...And none of them understood that she was born like that...
...From birth, her vitality was already extremely powerful— unlike any Uzumaki— and with the nine tails, it was taken to new levels.
"There's no secret, and never been one Koharu," Mito sighed inside but replied like she usually would. She then remarked, "But if you want to look young for a long time, you should listen to me and marry soon."
"Happiness and life fulfillment help keep away from stress and other physical burdens..."
"...Especially for us women."
"...Eh? Marriage?" Koharu's face changed when she said. Chuckling, she seemed to give up when she noted, "...Haha, happy to see you're doing well, Mito-sama,"
"Don't dodge the topic, you lass..." When Mito said worriedly, the snacks and the tea were served.
Telling the servants to leave, Mito picked up the steamy pitcher. And personally poured the hot beverage into two cups.
During which she told:
"...Your long-overdue marriage aside, you're not here just to chat about beauty and happiness, are you?"
"...Or are you just here to peek at my old face?"
Koharu didn't remind Mito of her youth or praise her again when she said:
"I'm here to talk about Tsunade and Nawaki, Mito-sama."
"What I wanted to ask was about Tsunade. Did you instruct her this morning?"
"Instruct her? What about?" Mito was confused.
"Thank you…" Koharu thanked Mito when she put the filled and warm teacup on the table. Then asked, "...You didn't, did you? I thought you would."
"Stop keeping me curious. What should I know?" Mito said.
"Ah... That's about Nawaki graduating from the academy," Koharu looked awkward and a little uncomfortable when she picked up her teacup for a taste and said. "...I thought Tsunade would consult you before graduating him this morning...Please don't say I told you..."
"What?!" Her enchanting, mature-looking eyes spreading wide and bulging, Mito cried emotionally.
When she heard the next announcement about Tsunade becoming Nawaki's Jonin sensei, she had her first ever nervous breakdown and fainted.
Passing out, Mito had a very random thought in mind.
...This morning, when she was worrying about licentious witches eyeing her grandson, she didn't think she could be talking about Tsunade.
Had she seen it too?
...That monster.


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