Natasha the Halve

Chapter 14: 14 – Cat. Laws. Boundaries.


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“And you are?” I stepped into the apartment and asked him.

He was taller than me, broad shoulders and thick arms.

I looked behind him and saw Lapia and Alyssa sitting in the living room, a person wearing all black on the sofa in front of them. I noticed Tay, the alchemist I met in the morning, standing next to the unknown guest.

“Yon. It’s an honor to meet Your Excellency.” he said, lowering his head. His voice was a pleasant tenor.

I nodded. How do I even respond to that?

Walking past him, I entered the living room and turned to look at the unknown guest.

[Egys Tigea, Lvl 203 Necromancer]

Blue feline eyes stared back at me. She was wearing a Goth Lolita dress. Black hair reached her shoulders, two round ears on top of her head, leaning to the sides. Her face was mostly gray-ish skin with black fur covering the sides and forehead. Gray, short, round eyebrows on top of her eyes. A small, gentle smile on her face. She didn’t look a day past her thirties. She gave me the impression of a panther.

I kept my face neutral. A nekomancer. Haha!

She stood up and gave me an elegant bow. Crossing a leg and raising the skirt of her dress while her other arm went over her chest.

Oh God, please no. I winced.

“Ren Dabrak, current head of House Dabrak. I cannot put in words how honored I am to meet Your Excellency Natasha.” her voice was mature and polite.

“Natasha Novak.” I said back. “Nice to meet you.”

She sat down, and I positioned myself between my two girlfriends on the sofa, crossing my legs and arms. I noticed tea utensils on the table between us.

“Your Excellency must be wondering why I wanted to meet.” She was wearing black stockings and high heels. A thin, black tail around her left leg. “First of all, I would like to welcome Your Excellency to Riverfield. I sincerely hope Your Excellency finds the city up to standards.” fangs peeked from between thin, black lips as she talked. “I must say I am relieved that some of my worries seemed misplaced.” she smiled at the two women on my sides. “Tay, would you be a dear and please serve us tea?”

The woman in question moved to the table and did as asked. The man on the door like a bouncer.

“Took your time.” Lapia nudged my arm and smiled at me.

“Got distracted with Sonya for a little.” I smiled back at her.

A plate and cup of tea was placed in front of each of us. I was dying inside. The woman in front of me felt like she came out of an old movie with her way of speaking.

“I confess I was plagued by worry when I first heard of Your Excellency’s arrival at Riverfield. I was informed of Your Excellency’s name and age, and couldn’t help but think some of my peers would approach with ill intentions. Thus, I decided to send my assistant to arrange a meeting. I am most pleased Your Excellency agreed.” she smiled.

Already regretting it. I took a sip of tea and tried to relax the knot in my stomach.

“I see.” I nodded. “Why did you decide to meet me here, instead of your own place, or something?”

“Your Excellency’s standing is above mine, it would be insolent to no end to arrange a meeting spot of my convenience.” she explained.

“Ahh…” I sighed. “Got it.”

“Though daring of me, I would assume Your Excellency’s partners have explained some of the workings of the world, or will do so in due time.” she took a sip of the tea and hummed. “Lady Lapia, you have excellent taste in tea, as always.”

“Thank you very much.” the Elf smiled back.

“Not at all.” she put the tea down and turned to me. “Your Excellency, I have come for a number of reasons. If Your Excellency would allow me such boldness, I would very much appreciate if we could trade some of the items Your Excellency woke up with. I am interested in purchasing elixirs, weapons, armor, and anything Your Excellency would be willing to part with.”

“Elixirs? Why?” I remembered Alyssa’s words at the elixir I showed her.

“Tay here is a very talented Alchemist. She would study them and, hopefully, come up with a way to replicate them.” she smiled at the woman in question. “While Clerics are stronger when it comes to healing, some settlements have none. Alchemists rise up to that demand.”

“Sounds alright. What’s in it for me?” I relaxed.

This is much simpler than I thought.

“Of course.” she raised a finger. “Ten gold coins for every unique elixir.”

“Mhm. Sounds fair.” I nodded.

I have a literal ton, anyway.

I stood up and walked to the kitchen table. Tay and Lady Dabrak followed me. I saw Alyssa visibly relax, shaking her head and whispering something to Lapia.

Yikes. Should finish this fast.

Taking out mid-tier potions, I placed them on the table.

[Elixir of Rejuvenation]

“Haven’t heard of this one.” Tay picked it up and appraised it.

[Elixir of Life]

“This is better than the ones I make.”

[Elixir of Night Vision]

“…”

[Elixir of Fire Resistance]

“…!”

[Elixir of Frost Resistance]

“…!!”

[Elixir of Shock Resistance]

“…!!!”

Her face morphed into one of awe as she appraised them.

...

In total, thirteen potions sat in front of us. The consumables in the game went from ‘tonic’, ‘potion’, ‘elixir’, ‘dew’, to ‘draught’. From level 20 to level 450.

I blame localized translation!

The table looked like a Christmas tree with all the different colored hues coming off of the glass bottles.

“What do you think, Tay dear?” Lady Dabrak asked the alchemist once I stopped producing them.

“I… would like to study them all.” she turned to me with shining eyes. “Do you have stronger ones?”

Shaking my head, I crossed my arms. “That’s what I’m willing to part with.”

The scene of Lapia becoming an absolute babe replayed in my head. I had yet to test the others, so I took out ones with obvious effects. I wasn’t about to whip out potions that granted immunity or silly shit like that.

Her shoulders sagged and turned to the necromancer.

“We should take them all, Lady.” her voice was defeated.

“I see.” the Noble turned to me. “That would be one platinum plaque and thirty gold coins, is Your Excellency satisfied with the amount?”

“Yes.” I shrugged.

I didn’t need more money, to be honest.

She produced a silvery credit card. I took it and noticed it had ‘Lumin Kingdom’ written on it, along with the ship and pickax. A serial number was carved on the left side.

Cool.

I stored it along with an embroidered cotton pouch holding the gold coins. The pattern was similar to the Noble’s dress.

“Would Your Excellency perhaps part with any armor, or weapons?” her pupils widened a little and an ear fidgeted.

“No, I don’t think I will.” I shook my head again.

Alyssa’s staff flashed in my mind. My weapons were too powerful. I had no low-level equipment as all my characters were max-level.

“May I inquire as to why, Your Excellency?” she gave me a polite smile.

“Elixirs can help people. Weapons and armor, however? No.”

“I understand.” she bowed. “I offer my deepest apologies if that offended Your Excellency.”

A queasy feeling ran up my spine.

“Let’s return to the living room, alright?” I offered, walking to the sofa.

I’m spent already, Nobility is not for me. Never again!

I sat down and Lady Dabrak did too.

“Now that business is done, we can go over the next topics I wanted to discuss with Your Excellency.” she smiled.

“Go ahead.” I nodded.

I turned to Lapia and she was smiling, not saying anything. Alyssa was in a similar state, smiling and silent.

Help me! Help. Me.

“As a fairly young city, Riverfield has seen very few Halves. His Excellency Miraztor visited over a thousand years ago. I would like to arrange an official welcoming party in Your Excellency’s name.” she smiled. “If Your Excellency refuses, I will understand. I am known as a woman of tradition, but I am not one to outright disrespect the wishes of others.”

“This… party. Is it a political thing?” I winced.

“Yes, it is. Nobles and Merchants would try and curry favor with Your Excellency. Your Excellency’s kind is more than just mighty individuals. A testament of power, wealth, status, tradition, culture, and much more. We Public Servants engage in such games, but ultimately respect those who wish to stay away from it. It may sound insolent, but we do not enjoy playing with an unwilling party. Please let me know if it’s not something that would be well received.”

Well, that was honest. I relaxed. She wasn't demanding or imposing anything.

“I’ll pass.” I nodded.

Fantasy politics? Miss me with that.

“I will let my peers know of Your Excellency’s preference.” she smiled. “Some, however, may not be as well behaved. Your Excellency’s extremely young age has already reached our circle.” she glanced at the woman next to the kitchen table, who was still fiddling with the potions. “But if Your Excellency’s response to my dear Tay is any indication, I believe there’s nothing to worry about.” she gave me a wide smile.

‘Your Excellency’ is kind of losing meaning in my mind by now. I blinked a few times.

“Thank you for the heads-up.” I nodded. “Also, could you please just call me by my name?”

“That, I cannot do, I’m afraid.” she shook her head, her ears shaking a little. “I would be throwing away my respect for Your Excellency as a being of higher power. I beg to be allowed this.” she lowered her head.

Holy shit. NEVER AGAIN!

“Okay.” I sighed. A headache was forming. “What’s next?”

“I am most grateful, Your Excellency.” she straightened and smiled. “I would like to interview Your Excellency, if that would be acceptable. My House owns Riverfield’s newspaper.” she stopped. “A newspaper is a form of written media. Publicized on the first day of the week for everyone to read, it contains information about current events, both domestic and foreign. I would like to write an article about Your Excellency.”

I took a deep breath. Calm down, me. I’m less than a week old in their eyes.

“Sounds fine.” I sighed again.

Alyssa fixed her position next to me, covering her mouth. Probably holding back laughter.

I chuckled.

Lady Dabrak took out a notepad and a quill.

“When and where did Your Excellency wake up in Galeia?” she asked.

The alchemist walked over and stood next to Lady Dabrak.

“Five or six days ago. In the middle of a forest, over ten thousand kilometers to the south. It was early morning when I came to, the weather was nice. There were a lot of birds and small critters.”

“So Your Excellency woke up in Tidon. Did anything interesting happen?”

“Yeah.” I chuckled. “I met this big bird. Wait, I’ll draw a sketch for you.”

I took out a sketchbook and quickly drew the turkey. I paid special attention to the feathers, it was the first time I saw something that looked like magic. I drew my silhouette next to it for size reference.

Lady Dabrak took the paper and smiled. “Your Excellency is a very talented artist. May I keep this for the article?”

“Thank you very much.” I smiled. “Sure, go ahead.”

“What happened with this bird?” she stored the drawing and wrote down a few things.

“I tried talking to it.” I laughed at the memory. “I followed it for a few hours. Then, we came across a river, where it wandered off back to the forest.”

“I see. Did Your Excellency appraise it, by any chance?” she looked me in the eye.

“No, I didn’t. I didn’t know I could do that at the time. Why?” I fixed my skirt as she studied my face.

She nodded. “I have never seen this kind of bird before. Turkeys don’t grow this big. How did Your Excellency reach Lumin?”

“I ran. One of my skills allows me to charge at very high speeds.” I re-read my skills.

Hmmm… is wind resistance treated as a ‘slowing’ effect?

I shook my head. I could ask later.

“As expected.” her smile grew. “What’s your impression of the world so far?”

“Warm, violent, fascinating.” I took my partners’ hands. “It’s a lot to take in, but I have two extremely smart women by my side, so I’m not worried.”

The two squeezed my hands.

“Lovely.” she gave us a warm smile. “May I ask about Your Excellency’s classes?”

“Warrior.” I simply said.

“Naturally.” she smiled and wrote down a few lines. “About goals, is there anything planned?”

“Go around, explore the world.” I shrugged. “Meet other Halves. Gods if I can.”

“Wonderful.” the sound of the quill scratching on the paper managed to calm my nerves a little. “I beg Your Excellency to forgive my audacity. I would recommend visiting Her Dinivity Danuva, His Divinity Saravia, and Her Divinity Shorvanna. The three live together up north.”

Even Gods have stupid ways to refer to them. I chuckled.

“I appreciate your advice.” I drank some more tea. The citric flavor with a hint of chamomile calming my slight headache. “What about other Halves?”

I thought maybe the Nobility knew of their locations, or where they were last seen.

“I am afraid I know no such information. I deeply apologize.” she lowered her head.

“It’s okay.” I sighed.

Her eyes went over what she wrote, then nodded to herself. “How long will Your Excellency stay in Riverfield?”

“Until tomorrow.” I drank more tea.

If Nobles are going to chase my tail, I’d like to leave as soon as possible.

“Any destination in mind?” her quill moved as she wrote some more.

“Not yet. We’ll talk about it later.” I looked at them and both nodded.

“Delightful.” she closed the notepad and stored it. “I believe that would conclude my visit. I am endlessly grateful that Your Excellency agreed to meet me.”

She stood up and I saw her black tail release her leg, hiding beneath the skirt. I stood up as well and sighed in relief.

Lapia and Alyssa imitated us and I walked to the door, following Lady Dabrak.

The Duelist opened the door and followed after Tay. I escorted them to the hallway, where the necromancer bowed once again.

“I am honored beyond words to have met Your Excellency. I extend the best of wishes, happy times, and plentiful spoils of war.” she gave me a wide smile.

“Same.” I smiled back. “Good luck with the elixirs.” I gave Tay a wink.

She simply nodded.

“Have a pleasant night, Your Excellency.” Yon lowered his head, his face showing a smile.

“Same to you.” I smiled back at him.

They turned around and left. I closed the door and let out a very long sigh.

Never again. I chuckled. Can’t even imagine what a party full of people like her is like. Lord Punten was much more relaxed... I think.

I walked back to the apartment and sat on a sofa, a loud sigh escaping me.

“You did great.” Lapia said from the kitchen. She was washing the cups and plates.

“Why did you leave me alone to deal with that woman?” I whined. “Where is Alyssa?”

The Luzo was nowhere to be seen.

“Bathroom.” she finished and walked over to me, then sat on my right. “Natasha, you’re your own person. You’ll meet more people like her in the future. I though it would be a good learning experience, so I asked Alyssa to keep quiet as well.”

“Meanie.” I hugged her. “That was stressing.”

“She held back.” she chuckled. “I told you she wasn’t unreasonable.”

I ran my hands on her back, the feeling of her warm body calmed me.

“That was her holding back?” I felt terror at the thought of the woman going all out. “Damn.”

“Nobles are an annoying bunch, but they understand limits.” she put her arms around my neck. “They are raised to be respectful. Can’t be successful if they offend the wrong people.”

“I felt so odd.” I smelled her hair, the scent of lavender tickling my nose. “Your Excellency this and that.”

“I did tell you to get used to it.” she pulled back and kissed me. “Was it that bad?”

“Not really.” I caressed her face. “She left pretty quickly, after all.”

“Should’ve seen your face. You were glaring at the woman.” she laughed. Her canines and sharp teeth showing. “She must’ve taken it as a sign to leave.”

“Seriously?” I reeled back a bit. “I thought I was pretty chill.”

“Well, you have that permanent stare, so I understand.” she looked me in the eye.

What a nice way to say ‘resting bitch face’. I chuckled.

I heard the bathroom door open, then close. Alyssa’s footsteps followed.

“Finally, the hag left.” the Luzo’s loud voice reached us as she came into view.

She walked over to us and sat to my left, the sofa shifting at the action.

“Hag?” Lapia turned to her. “She’s barely two hundred and thirty seven years old.”

“What?!” I gaped at the Elf. “That’s a hag alright!”

“See? Her Excellency agrees with me.” Alyssa gave me a cheeky smile.

“Please don’t. Those words lost their meaning in my mind.” I chuckled while relaxing on the sofa.

She giggled and leaned her head on my shoulder.

I looked at the clock on the wall and struggled for a few seconds to read the time. Nine thirty?

A sigh escaped me. The booklet about Ratnaks materialized in my hands.

Lapia summoned a thin book with some symbols on the cover. I assumed it was probably related to E’er, having recognized some of the simpler shapes.

Alyssa took out the romance novel I gave her.

I continued reading about the beasts until a line caught my attention.

‘A Ratnak’s scales can become as hard as the metal they consume.’

“Alyssa?” I turned to her.

“Yes?” she looked up at me from the book. Her deep red eyes locked on mine.

“Here it says something about a Ratnak’s scales becoming as hard as what they eat. Is that true?” I tilted my head.

It sounded too fantastic, even for me.

“Yes. You shouldn’t feed Sonya metals above a certain density, however. Her scales need to be flexible enough to allow movement. The feed they gave you is an alloy mostly consisting of soft and malleable metals. It’s perfect for a Ratnak; they can easily digest it, keeps their scales hard enough to endure impacts, and resistant enough to withstand high temperatures. Their digestive organs are pretty strong, as you might’ve guessed already.” she smiled.

“That’s pretty cool. So if I want Sonya to be at her hardest, should I feed her my armor?” my smile widened with excitement.

“That would leave you with no armor.” she giggled.

I tilted my head. “I have more than one set, though?”

Her eyes widened to their limits.

“What?!” Lapia asked next to me. “Then why did you give us those flimsy-looking robes?”

“Well, Alyssa has a tail. And your ass is huge, Lapia.” I giggled. “You won’t fit in the pants.”

You are reading story Natasha the Halve at novel35.com

“Hahahahaha!!” the Luzo burst out laughing.

“My ass is not that big!” she blushed. “What are you laughing at, Alyssa? Your huge tits wouldn’t fit either!”

The healer gasped, covering her chest. “You did nooot!”

“Hahahahaha!” I laughed.

“Why are you laughing, Natasha?” Alyssa blushed. “If not for your panties, you massive penis would get in the way!”

“““HAHAHAHAHAHA!!”””

The three of us burst into laughter. I covered my stomach and enjoyed the silliness of the situation.

I clapped for a while and choked on my own saliva, making us laugh even more. The picture of a dummy thick armor too funny.

I noticed Alyssa’s tail slapping the sofa as she laughed. Lapia’s ears twitched a little.

“Ahhh…” Lapia let out a long breath after we managed to calm down. “Such a good chain punch.”

“True.” a few giggles escaped me. “Anyway, the robes are pretty good.”

“Can I see a piece of armor?” Alyssa extended a hand.

I summoned a helmet and gave it to her. Her eyes squinted at the item.

“SSS+? Yeah, too tough. Sonya would need to be insanely high level to move with scales that hard.” she weighted it from one hand to the other. “Pretty heavy, too. Good thing it has ‘Weightless Wear’.”

She handed me the thing and I stored it.

“So, where are we going?” I asked. “We leave tomorrow, right?”

“Yes.” Lapia answered. “I resigned earlier today.”

“I’m still a little surprised at how easily you decided to leave.” I confessed.

“Well… I was attacked on the road, I realized I was stagnating.” she shrugged. “I’ll have some trouble once we leave. I don’t think it’ll last long, however.” she sighed.

“We’re here for you, Lapia.” Alyssa commented and smiled at her. I nodded.

“Thank you, Alyssa.” she blushed a little.

“I was thinking northwest.” the Luzo fiddled with her tail, making it wrap around her wrist. “There are a good amount of dungeons there. Also, Mountroad is in that direction.”

The Elf nodded. “Sounds pretty good. We could recruit a Scout or an Archer there.”

“How long is the trip?” I rubbed my eyes.

“The longest in your life.” the Luzo gave me a cheeky smile.

I tilted my head in confusion. Longest? Where are we even going?

“Three days.” the Elf leaned to the side. “That’s half your life.”

“Ah, yeah. That would be the longest trip.” I chuckled. Then, I smirked at them. “I could make it in a few minutes, though.” I pointed out.

Alyssa smiled and wrapped her tail on my thigh.

“Hey. Since we’re leaving tomorrow, should we go over the laws tonight?” she asked, looking me in the eye with her scarlet ones.

“Sounds good.” I sighed. “Make it simple, please.”

“Okay.” she smiled. “The judicial system is split in two; courts and bounties. If someone commits a crime within a city, the Watchers would apprehend them and take them to court where they would receive judgment. This court is made up of regular citizens and change every two months, with one cleric supervising the process, since we study the law. Simple so far?”

“Yes.” I put a hand on her thigh and caressed her scales.

“If someone commits a crime outside a city, that is, in the wild, someone would have to report them. Then, the Watchers investigate and put a bounty on the criminal. If there’s little information, the bounty would be to bring them alive for interrogation. If the evidence is concrete enough, they may issue an order of ‘Kill on Sight’ if the crimes justify it. They offer a reward for whoever brings them in, usually in silver. There is no reward for killing them, however.”

“Okay. Pretty simple.” I stretched and sighed. “What do they do with criminals if they’re found guilty?”

“Prison. There is one in Lumin Kingdom. The Endless Pit, next to Paarjo, the capital. A literal hole in the ground. A sentence can range from fifty to a thousand years. Prisoners are tied with Numbing Rope and hanged. They are given enough food and water so they don’t starve to death.” she sighed. “It might sound too brutal, but abiding the law is the basis of contemporary society. If I were to disagree with a Human, for example, all I have to do is wait four hundred years and they’d die of old age. The moment you commit a crime, you surrender your rights.”

Four hundred years? That’s a lot…

“What about theft, or small crimes like that?” I was incredibly confused.

“Ah, well. You get a fine and forced labor. The more despicable the crime, the worst the punishment, of course.” she explained. “The Watchers always investigate.”

“Hmm… I see.” I nodded.

It sounded pretty weird. I remembered the Watcher said they’d investigate Lapia’s case.

Wonder how that’ll end.

“Then, we have to address Society versus Rule.” her voice increased in volume. “Let’s say Lady Dabrak is found guilty of embezzlement. She would forfeit all rights to a trial. The populace would become her executioner. A corrupt Noble is of no use. Same with Royals and the Military. A country has no need for them, really. You can replace a King, a Queen, a General, or a Noble. You can’t replace the populace. We are what truly matters in a country. There’s more of us and we have more raw power. All it takes is an assembly for a city to fall in a single day. That keeps them clean and proper. If all else fails and a dictator rises to power, we have Halves.” she gave me a smile.

“Yulianna executed an entire Royal Family five hundred years ago, along with all the Nobles and the high-ranking Military. The country then became a Republic. Everyone who holds political power knows this. ‘If you betray the people, they will bite your head off’ is what she said.” she was smiling as she said those words.

“What if a Halve gets drunk with power?” I asked. The loop-holes were waving at me.

She looked at me with an unimpressed face.

“Would you rule a country?” she asked me.

“Not at all.” I instantly said.

“Well, there you have it.” she shrugged. “Halves have never been part of any government.”

“What if I commit a crime, then?” I tilted my head. “Who would stop me? No, who could?”

“That is a big point of discussion. A mute discussion, fortunately. You are born with incredible might, yes. At the same time, however, you all understand good and evil. In your own ways, of course. That… is one of the many mysteries. How come the most powerful beings in the world aren’t tempted by power? Are your minds constructed in such a way? Is authority not that seductive when one is born with such might? Is the instinct to protect that much compelling than any mortal temptation?” she smiled. “All questions that have no answer. We have facts and evidence, however. No Halve has ever ruled.”

“Well, aren’t we perfect.” I scoffed.

“No, you aren’t.” Lapia said, putting her book away. “A very long time ago, Holistos, a Halve, destroyed an entire country. Then, other Halves teamed up and killed him. They took his dead body before the Gods and Danuva revealed he was born with a fragmented mind. That has happened three times so far. However, a few individuals do not represent an entire species.”

“How did they find that out if he was dead?” that made me skeptical, even for a magical world.

“Danuva.” Alyssa shrugged. “The mind stays behind after death.”

Okay, that’s too much. I shook my head. That’s existential crisis fuel for me.

“Got it. If I’m a naughty girl, my big siblings would come and fuck me in the ass.” I said in a bratty voice.

“Exactly.” Alyssa giggled. “That would be it for the law. In very broad terms.”

Lapia chuckled.

I thought back on the conversation and the comment about recruiting more people to the group made me a little nervous.

“Hey, how would we go about ‘recruiting’ more people?” I asked, playing with my hair. “There’s three of us, how do we decide if someone joins?”

“Mhm. We could set boundaries right now.” Lapia said while standing up. “How about we discuss it over some alcohol?”

“Alright!” the Luzo cheered and followed her to the table.

I followed and we all sat down, the Elf produced five bottles. Three had transparent liquids and two were amber colored.

More vodka? Nice!

Alyssa produced green olives and pickles.

I searched my storage and took out a wheel of cheese. Nothing hinted at what kind.

It was white, around a meter in diameter and had no protective film. I took out a dagger and cut a triangle. Then, I cut out a small chunk and ate it.

Goat? Fucking awesome!

I put it on the table with a loud thunk, then, with a dead serious voice said, “Cheese.”

“Nice, what kind?” Lapia took out glasses and served two with the amber liquid and one transparent.

“Goat.” I received the fantasy vodka and drank a sip.

Ugh. Delicious.

“What did you cut it with?” Alyssa looked at the dagger.

“A Unique dagger. Why?” I cut the triangle in small chunks, around a cubic centimeter in size. The Elf put a plate on the table where I placed the cheese.

“That didn’t leave any weird effect?” Lapia asked, a concerned expression on her face.

I appraised it. It was a 'regular' dagger, no special effects. I shrugged.

“None.” I offered the weapon, holding it by the edge. “Check it.”

“I trust you.” she gave me a smile.

My cheeks heated up. I simply nodded.

“First,” I started. “Are we… like, you know, long term?” I took a swig after saying that.

“I’d like that.” Alyssa blushed.

“Same with me.” the wizard said, and took a sip from her glass as well.

“So, about new partners.” the healer cleared her throat. “Let’s talk about things we won’t accept. I think any member of the short to medium species would be a pass. We three will live more than four thousand years. While I will be able to extend lifespan, it’s limited, and I don’t know how long will take me to achieve it.”

“Reasonable.” Lapia nodded. “That would leave the long species as only candidates. I’m pretty open. Except for the Jorrksuuv.” she shivered.

“What are those?” I asked, drinking more vodka.

“Bugs.” Alyssa said.

I choked on my drink.

“Don’t call them bugs.” the Elf chastised her. “It’s insect.”

“Wha-cough! What?” I winced, cleaning my face. “Fucking insects? That’s disgusting!”

“Alright, they’re ugly, yes. Disgusting would be pushing it, however.” Lapia shook her head.

“The priestess said they have seven genders, how is that possible?” my stomach twisted at the thought of a person-sized bug flirting with me.

“Their gestation works like a factory assembly line.” Alyssa stopped for a second. “Do you know what that is?”

“Yes, I get the idea of how that works.” I flexed my fingers to calm the queasiness.

“The egg goes from one to the next, each individual helps with the gestation of a different system.” she explained.

“Okay, I’m not comfortable with this insect talk.” I said, drinking more.

I imagined a giant cockroach winking at me and blowing me a kiss. I shook my head.

Please, don’t. I trembled all over.

They both giggled at my reaction.

“What about more… primal features?” Lapia asked, playing with a pickle. “Minotaurs, Lamia, Harpies, and Merfolk belong to the long species.”

“Merfolk need to swim in the ocean every four months tops, that would limit our travels.” Alyssa said as she ate some olives and took a sip of her drink.

“Wasn’t it once a year?” the Elf tilted her head.

The Luzo shook her head. “Four months. That’s a little problematic. We can’t go to the desert in that case.” the Luzo offered me some olives.

I ate one. Tasty.

“Hmm… true.” Lapia ate some cheese and hummed. “This is good.”

“Harpies don’t like Elves, so that’s that.” Alyssa shrugged.

The Elf scowled. “Unreasonable bunch.”

I finished my drink and served more alcohol. The thought of giant bugs still in my mind.

“What are Lamia like?” I thought of snake women, but doubted they would be a single gender species. “You only mentioned them this morning.”

“The lower half of their bodies are serpent-like.” Lapia answered, refilling her glass. “We’d be lucky to meet one, though. They’re really secluded.”

I nodded. I had no interest in Lamia.

“They’re often mistaken for gorgons, so it’s understandable if they hide.” Alyssa commented, a piece of cheese in her mouth.

“Minotaurs are incredibly discriminatory.” the Elf chuckled. “They don’t involve themselves with people without horns.”

“Damn. That’s fucked up.” I took a pickle and bit it. The sourness exquisite. “What are we left with, then?”

“Elves, Luzo, Oni, Orks, and Goliaths.” Alyssa commented after swallowing. “There are very few species with long lifespans.”

That’s still a lot.

“Hmm.” I chewed on another pickle. The mix of vodka with the snack divine. “Would people from your species be okay?”

They both nodded.

“Okay, now that we have boundaries, we can talk about how we would include an individual.” Lapia drank from her glass and sighed. “How about all or nothing?”

“I’m okay with that.” the Luzo nodded.

“And that is?” I finished my second glass, quickly refilling it while chewing on cheese.

“If one of us doesn’t like somebody, it’s a no-no.” Lapia pointed at me with a pickle.

“Reasonable.” I drank more. “Any particular inclination?”

“Elmari Elves.” Lapia blushed. “They’re just… ngh!”

Alyssa shook her head. “Not really.”

I chuckled. Elmari… the chauffeur was one.

“I saw an Elmari Elf. She was driving Lady Dabrak’s carriage. I think it was hers, at least.” I put an olive between two cheese cubes and ate the questionable sandwich.

“I’ve met her.” the Elf nodded. “She goes for young boys only. Pretty quiet girl, too.”

“Can I ask what a ‘young boy’ is?” I tilted my head.

She had said that quite the number of times. Please don’t be a pedophile.

“It’s an endearing term used to refer to bald men. Mostly for Humans.” she said.

I sighed in relief.

“Natasha. I have to ask.” Lapia gave me a complicated smile. “What are you doing with the olive pits?”

I stopped chewing and looked down at the table. There, Lapia and Alyssa both had a napkin with a few.

“They have?” I took a napkin from my storage and spat what I had in my mouth on it. “Shit.”

I had crushed them. Broken pieces here and there between the meat.

What? I looked at them. I didn’t even feel them, my teeth and jaw too strong. I thought they were stuffed olives.

“Ah, I thought you were swallowing them whole.” she shrugged. “No big deal.”

I sighed. The crack on my sense of reality growing a few centimeters.

“Not like they would be a problem, anyway.” Alyssa patted my shoulder.

I noticed her empty glass and refilled it. She nodded and took a sip.

“Are we going to the dungeons?” the Elf asked.

I nodded. “That would be nice. I want to go to one.”

“Hmm.” the Luzo thought for a second. “We have you Natasha, a Halve above level one thousand, so we don’t really need another warrior at the front. A tank would be nice, to protect us in the back. Also an Archer, and a Scout.”

“What can be a tank if not a warrior?” I asked.

Classes in this world were much more varied. Cardinals didn’t exist in the game, after all.

“Clerics.” she answered. “They focus on self-buffs and learn combat techniques. Monks, Paladins, Crusaders, Inquisitors, etc. Their healing spells are way weaker than us supportive clerics, but they do a pretty good job of protecting others.”

“The adults accompanying the kids were Paladins.” I recalled. "They were pretty high level, considering what I have seen so far."

“Yes. The Church lend their personnel for childcare.” the healer nodded.

“They are the future, top priority. Not even a Noble has that much protection. Lady Dabrak was joined by her personal bodyguard, the Duelist.” Lapia said. “Did you see his level?”

“I did.” I ate another olive and took the pit out, placing it on the napkin. “So a tank, a Scout, and an Archer.”

“Pretty much.” Alyssa yawned. “Uh, I think the alcohol just hit me.”

Lapia yawned by reflex. I chuckled.

“Anything else you’d like to ask?” the Elf looked at me.

“A shit ton.” I smiled. “But we covered my concerns. Thank you.”

“It’s good to talk things over.” Alyssa smiled and yawned again. “Ahh… it’s pretty late.”

I turned to the clock. Uhh… Ten fifty? Or Eleven?

“We should go to bed.” I stored the cheese and drank the rest of my glass in one go.

“Mhm.” Lapia rubbed her eyes. “I’ll wash the glasses, you go first.”

She took them and turned to the kitchen.

“I need to go to the bathroom.” I chuckled. “I’ll join you tonight, I want proper rest.”

“Nice!” Alyssa giggled. “Let’s cuddle, the three of us.”

I stood up and gave her a kiss, then walked to the Kingdom of Rest.

Facing the Throne, I peed. Then, I equipped a thong. Sitting down, I moved the string aside, making the nastier process easier. Since my partner was covered, it didn’t touch the bowl.

Sometimes my genius is… it’s almost frightening. I chuckled.

The alcohol barely did anything, but I was a little giddy.

I did my business, then went to the room. Lapia and Alyssa were under the covers already. I undressed and made sure my braid was tight, then went under the covers.

With Alyssa in the middle, we got ready to sleep.

“Sleep tight, you two.” I said.

Lapia waved her hand and the lights went off.

My glow bathed the room in a gentle gold light.

“Sweet dreams, Natasha.” Alyssa gave me a kiss.

“I’ll probably dream of Hell again.” I shook my head.

“Are you scared?” the Elf asked after a few seconds.

“Not really.” I sighed. “It’s just… concerning.”

“Do you want to have sex before sleeping? Maybe that will help.” the Luzo blushed and gave me a shy smile.

“You should rest. Thank you, Alyssa.” I caressed her back and playfully slapped her ass.

“Nn. Whenever you want, Queen.” she giggled, then turned and hugged Lapia.

I heard them kiss and smiled.

“Good night.” Lapia whispered.

I hugged Alyssa’s waist and closed my eyes. The feeling of her warm scales against my skin and her fit stomach was calming.

Here we go.

I relaxed, letting tiredness take a hold of me.

Biggest-Kusa-Out-There

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