Chapter 259: 258

   “…Don’t ever! Don’t ever do something like this again. Understood?” I clung onto the Mage.

     However, Seo Dawon merely smiled coldly. “Lee-kyung-ah… That’s something you should say after you’ve sliced through my stomach.”

    Though his tone was chilly, it seemed like his anger had lost momentum.

     After his sarcastic remark, Seo Dawon seized my neck with one hand. Though he didn’t squeeze hard enough to choke me, I knew that he could easily break my neck with just a press of his thumb.

     An uneasy atmosphere settled between us. However, the Mage couldn’t even properly threaten to break my neck–his fingers still trembled; I covered his hand with mine. Seo Dawon briefly glared at my hand before relaxing his grip; he then slowly lowered his hand down my exposed front.

     “I thought about it.” He pressed on my most fatal injury, right under my prominent ribs. I flinched and inhaled reflexively; his hand did not stop pressuring that spot. Maintaining that position, Seo Dawon leaned in to whisper, “My desire to kill you stems from instinct, regardless of my desires or will.”

     “……”

     “Plus, you have no idea whether or not your affection towards me is real.”

     Seo Dawon had long stated he was drawn to my blood. Of course, he had never explicitly shown his desire for my blood in my presence, but, anytime we broached this topic, Seo Dawon’s expression looked so sensitive.

     Since he never had this sort of impulse while alive, I thought this desire for blood may be a penalty crafted by the system.

     And the Mage loathed that desire. He was someone that wanted–needed–control over his situation; thus, he became angry at the barbaric (what sick system would make someone salivate over blood?) system that attempted to manipulate his actions.

     However, this time, he was also doubtful of my own feelings. He attributed my affection for him as an emotion manufactured by this ‘contract.’

     At first, I couldn’t understand what he said, so I stared blankly at him; soon, anger slowly rose within–enough for me to forget my constant anxiety. It was like he was totally denying my feelings for him.

     “…What nonsense is that?” I asked, as if I were picking a fight.

    Seo Dawon, though, was unperturbed. Rather, he had a reply ready, as if he was waiting for my question. “Ragi saw. Someone with ‘my face’ killed you in that nightmare.”

     “…What?”

     “However, you remembered none of that.”

     I was simply dumbfounded–Woo Ragi never said anything like that to me. ‘How did Woo Ragi see inside my dreams?’

     However, that wasn’t important right now. Did I lose my memory through a trick from the system or through shock? “The doctor said that there is a high probability that my memories have failed due to excessive bleeding. When I recover–!”

     “–But, I can roughly guess what had happened: who made you injured like this. You aren’t scared of other people, but you’re frightened from just seeing me.”

     ​​”……”

     “You thought it was strange too, right?”

     Of course, I thought my behavior was strange. However, I didn’t think much further–I simply thought that Koo Hui-seo may have done something and not the Mage. Even though someone wearing Seo Dawon’s face may have harmed me, it must have been the ex-chimera instead.

     At that moment, as if he had read my thoughts, Seo Dawon snorted. “What a convenient memory.”

    “……”

    “What do you think will happen if I stab you right now? I think I know the answer.”

     “……”

     “I can see it on your face, you’re thinking, ‘Servants can’t kill Masters anyway, so he can’t truly intend to kill me.'”

     “……”

     With that said, Seo Dawon grabbed my wrist, the arm that was still clutching onto the Mage. After applying enough strength for me to feel the intent behind his grasp, he stated in a cynical tone, “What if I were to break your arm for no reason? That’s not a ‘life-threatening’ injury, after all. Could you forgive me for that?”

     “……”

    “What if I were to rape you here? Will you say, ‘It doesn’t matter because I like him?'”

     “……” I tried to deny him.

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     Seo Dawon saw me open my mouth to answer and pulled at my hand violently. “Why are you only denying with your words? Right now, it feels like you’re unable to shake off my hand.”

     When I heard that, I belatedly tried to push his arm away; however, strangely, my hands remained still. It felt like they were submerged in very deep water, and their mobility was reduced due to great pressure. I couldn’t move my arm up and down easily; in the end, I couldn’t push him away.

     As he said, I couldn’t defend myself against the threat of his attacks. My body simply didn’t have the will to defend itself. That was absolutely shocking.

     “Now…”

     “……”

     “I think you finally understand.” With that said, Seo Dawon stood up. A deep shadow cast over me as he moved away.

     However, I couldn’t let him go.

     The Mage believed that I only liked him because of the scenario or the quirks of the system… The thought that he held those foolish beliefs while looking down at me every night made my head steam and my temper rise.

     I clenched my teeth and called out to him. “[Seo Dawon], this is a ‘command.’ Don’t leave. Stay here.”

     Seo Dawon’s red eyes flashed, and two shadows fell on the blinds next to the bed.

     The mage stopped in his attempt to turn around and stared at me. I slowly raised my torso,  using his rigid, doll-like arms.

     Finally, we were face to face. After wiping away the tears that threatened to spill due to anger, I could finally speak to my heart’s content. “Hey, you…”

     “Yes.”

     “Are you an i-idiot? You…refused my blood when I slit my palm for you. You said that there’s another way. Why are you acting like you’re the only one that can resist the system…and not me?”

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     “……” Seo Dawon didn’t answer, but he blinked obediently. His current expression was my favorite. I glared at him resentfully and embraced his head.

     Judging from his reaction, the Mage seemed determined to dismiss all my advances as something manipulated by the scenario or a trick from the system.

     More than knowing that the Mage desired my blood, it felt more despairing to know that Seo Dawon doubted my feelings and wanted to distance himself from me. He even thought he was acting on my behalf–to ‘protect’ me.

     ‘Since when was he such a romantic…?!’ The more I thought about it, the angrier I became. So, he’ll start to distance himself even more to ‘protect’ me? His judgment was awful.

     That, at least, was clear.

     It seemed like Seo Dawon was disappointed in himself because he thought I would die. And, because of that, he wanted to push me away? A while ago, he was so overwhelmed with jealousy–he showed off so much in front of Han Kiseok… I didn’t ask that from him…!

     ‘Thinking about it, he’s so overprotective…’

     What was even more amusing was his confidence that he’d be able to kill me.

     Seo Dawon liked me more than he realized. That was absolutely clear. However, if I were to ask him to confirm this fact, he’d deny everything.

     He’d probably continue to think up words to scar my heart. Like today, he’d try to scare me so that I’d run away on my own. At the same time, if a person like Han Kiseok stumbled around my vicinity, he’d gladly interrupt. Even if I try to reject the suitor, he’d interrupt. I could clearly see his pained struggles as he tries to let me go, despite the very idea of being apart from me bringing him agony.

     “Seo Dawon, this is a command.”

     “Yes.”

     “Close your eyes and stay still.”

     His jewel-like red eyes vanished, as if they had been sucked into his skull. [efn_note] This is… I believe a poetic way to say “his red eyes vanished from view.” Except, I have a horrible mental image now. [/efn_note]

     I slowly circled the IV needle stuck in the back of my hand. I deliberately tore at the skin while still leaving the needle stuck inside.

     Blood billowed up along the torn line; in that state, I walked over to the Mage on my knees. Then, I raised my bleeding hand and swept it against his cheek. His cheeks slightly twitched in response to the scent of blood, but he did not open his eyes, still faithful to my ‘command.’

     So, I was able to comfortably kiss his lips. Seo Dawon didn’t move, but the moment my lips met his, my ‘command’ had already subsided. The Mage slowly opened his eyes.

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