We are panning across five monitors. The first shows Blitzo, Sylvester and Moxxie outside Martha's house, Moxxie then pushing Sylvester's musket, causing him to shoot in the wrong directions. The second shows Millie coming out of the ocean after killing the fish monster from when Blitzo challenged Verosika.
The third shows Millie and Moxxie French-kissing while swining on a rope when they were battling the Cherubs. The fourths shows Sylvester stabbing a human in the head with his claws when he was watching the opera.
The fifth shows a shot of some horses, which then the picture zooms in past them onto Blitzo, who was caught choking on the boba pearls of his drink. Someone then points at the screen with Blitzo.
S
"Right there!" Agent One says. "This was the first sighting."
"They are definitely from Hell." Agent Two states. "They must use this dark magic to cross over into our world... and they seem to be killing specifically targeted people. But, why?"
"They always attack at random, aaall over the country." Agent One says. "There's no way to predict where they'll show up next!"
A loud clattering noise is heard from outside, followed by a stock angry cat sound. The two agents immediately glance over to a barred-up window obscured by heavily damaged blinds. Agent Two makes a gap between the blinds to the outside to see what made that noise. The agents then see the source of all the racket: Blitzo, standing on a box and a dumpster while holding the dumpster lid open. He looks around suspiciously.
"Ahh, well... That's convenient." Agent Two smiles.
Outside Blitzo is standing on trash bags holding a dumpster lid open. "Shhhhh! Remember, we can't be seen."
Blitzo slams the dumpster lid loudly, but then falls backwards into a pile of trash bags. Millie silently chuckles at his predicament, then walks away.
Sylvester lights up a cigarette and then takes a large puff and lets out a big cloud of smoke.
"Pardon my words, sir, but you're currently being the loudest." Blitzo points out.
Blitzo jumps up out of the garbage pile covered in trash; he has an old newspaper on his forehead, a half-eaten lollipop stuck to the side of his head, a scrap of paper on his horn with an old banana peel impaled on the end of it, and a used condom on his index finger, the same finger he uses to poke Moxxie's face indignantly.
Blitzo softly speaks to Moxxie. "I said shuush your dick-sucking lips, Moxxie!"
Moxxie steps away from his boss for a short moment, likely grossed out from Blitzo's condom finger, as he notices a portal opening behind him. Loona is seen on the other end and Millie jumps into it, waving to Moxxie. Moxxie begins to walk towards the portal but is suddenly tackled to the ground by Blitzo, barely missing a net being shot their way.
Sylvester ducks as a tranquilizer round flies over his head.
"GET DOWN!" Blitzo yells.
Agent One cocks his net launcher, readying another capture net. Blitzo looks behind him and sees Agent Two jump down on a rope from a building, landing in front of the portal.
"LOONA!" Blitzo yells. "CLOSE IT!"
"But-" Loona starts.
Sylvester looks back at her. "Well, be fine. JUST CLOSE IT!"
"Wait, no!" Millie yells as she tries to run through the portal before it closes, but fails.
Moxxie, seeing the portal close, is distraught at first but quickly shifts to anger, pulling out a pistol in an attempt to fight off the two agents while Blitzo hides. Sylvester ducks under a net that flies over his head and he pulls out his flintlock, firing a round at Agent One, who slides to the side and avoids the round.
Moxxie jumps off a wooden pallet to dodge both a tranquilizer dart and a capture net and prepares to fire. However, he is hit in the neck from behind by a tranquilizer dart.
Moxxie stumbles, mumbling incoherently, then falls to the ground.
"MOXXIE!" Blitzo yells.
"Shit!" Sylvester yells and he turns around, only to receive a tranquilizer dart to the nose. Sylvester stumbles a little, but he shakes his head and grabs Moxxie, while Blitzo jumps onto his back.
"RUN!" Blitzo yells.
Sylvester runs and Blitzo smacks Agent two in the face with his tail as Sylvester runs past.
"I smell..." Moxxie slurs his words and he sniffs. "Colors..."
Sylvester reaches a dead end, and Blitzo hops off his back as Sylvester sets Moxxie on the ground. The agents waste no time in cornering them. Blitzo raises his gun, ready to fight, so does Sylvester.
"Let's go you fucks!" Sylvester yells.
A tranquilizer dart is shot into his crotch and Sylvester starts to speak in a deep and slow tone. "Tttthhhhaaaaatttt wwwwaaaassss nnnooooottt cccoooolll!" He falls to the ground and his cigarette falls from his mouth.
Blitzo growls and steps in front of Sylvester, defensively. "Back off, you tuxedo-wearing FUCKS!"
Blitzo and the agents both ready their guns and prepare for a firefight. But just as Blitzo is about to fire, Agent Two pushes a button on her gun, causing Blitzo, Sylvester and Moxxie to be electrocuted. Blitzo is zapped a second time from residual charge, dropping his gun and going down for the count.
The agents are then seen through Blitzo's eyes
Agent One chuckles confidently. "I'd like to see the suits at corporate callin' us losers now! That was pretty badass."
Agent two cocks her gun. "Super badass.
Soon enough, Blitzo passes out. Meanwhile in the I.M.P. office, Millie furiously punches the wall, tears in her eyes and making vicious demon screeches, before falling to her knees devastated.
"SHIT! Shit, shit, shit!" Millie yells.
Millie wails with her head and hands on the floor. Loona stand behind her with Stolas' Grimoire in her hands, looking concerned.
"You, uh... You okay, there?" Loona's voice breaks a little as she holds back a few tears.
Millie suddenly stands up, startling Loona into dropping the Grimoire and holding her hands up defensively. "What're you doing sittin' there?! The boys are in trouble! Open it again!"
"Blitzo was using a total of zero euphemisms, innuendos, or swears. That means it was serious. Even Sylvester shouted in complete seriousness, which I don't open it until--"
Consumed by rage and worry for her husband, Friend and Boss, Millie grabs Loona by her shirt and yanks her down to face level. "Open the fucking portal, now!" She says furiously.
Cuts to a sequence of Loona and Millie gearing up for a rescue mission. Lonna puts a pack of cigarettes in a backpack labeled "Blitzø's Emergen-C Bag" and zips it closed, an angry Millie twirls and lifts a giant double-headed axe with the 'M' in the middle, and Loona transforms to her human form. The portal opens again, and Millie leaps out and lands in a pose while Loona nonchalantly steps through.
"They aren't here...!" Millie drops her axe and falls to her knees again, tears welling in her eyes. Before she can cry, Loona suddenly grabs and lifts her up, bending down to sniff the ground to track where Blitzo, Sylvester and Moxxie went.
"It smells like they went this way." Loona drops Millie into the backpack and slings it onto her back, then grabs Millie's axe off the ground, resting it on her shoulder. "Come on... Let's find the dumbass twins and stupid fox."
Loona starts running while carrying Millie.
.
.
.
In an unknown location, Moxxie wakes up and looks around groggily.
Moxxie, Sylvester and Blitzo are tiles to chairs, with the Imps tails chained to a ball on the ground.
Moxxie panics and briefly struggles to get out, until Agent Two grabs the lamp over their heads and brings it close to Moxxie's face, causing him to flinch away.
"Finally awake, huh, little fella?" Agent Two releases the lamp. "Your partners have been for a while now."
Blitzo starts. "Look, shitbag, it takes a lot to keep me down, alright? I took a fuck-ton of tranquilizers in the college I dropped out of. Also, I've been strapped nipple first to a car battery. So, I--" Blitzo flinches as the lamp is shined in his face by Agent One. "Ohhh, okay!"
"Tell us, demon scum!" Agent One orders. "Who do you work for? Satan?!"
Agent Two grabs the light again. They begin grabbing it back and forth as they interrogate the two Imps and Hellfox.
"How did you get to our world from the afterlife?" Agent Two asks.
"Why are youse killin' humans?!" Agent One asks.
"When did you show up here?"
The two agents stop passing the lights as Sylvester speaks up.
"Okay, I'll tell you, just lean in close." Sylvester says.
Agent One and Two lean in close and Sylvester just blows a large cloud of smoke into their faces, causing them to cough.
Blitzo and Sylvester laugh and kick their legs as much as they can.
"YOU FELL FOR IT!" Sylvester laughs, then Agent One punches him in the gut along with Agent Two, causing Sylvester to cough. "Oh, I think you broke a rib."
Blitzo becomes annoyed. "okay, I'm gonna stop you right there, bitches. First of all, we just woke up from a veeeeery nasty shock. And I'm still feelin' woozy, so I'm gonna request you fetch us some coffee before we get into this. I mean, everyone gets coffee in shitty movies with scenes like this, am I right? I want somethin' iced, bitch!" Blitzo turns his head around to Moxxie and Sylvester. "Mox? Sylvie?"
"I'll take a large Peppermint Mocha with an extra shot of espresso, and don't forget the whipped cream!" Sylvester says. "And can I get a cigarette along with that, it'll help with my headache and the pain I'm in from this broken rib."
The Moxxie gives his order. "I'll have a Neapolitan cappuccino, more cappu- than -ccino, make sure it's got no more than four ounces of milk; the beans won't have the right texture otherwise, and make sure they spell my name correctly on the cup-they always put "Foxy" or "Roxy"; I hate that. If you can't handle that, I'll have a Venti traditional misto. Please use soy milk, with two blond shots affogato. "He points foot accusatorily at Agent Two "-and ristretto! I'd also love... three vanilla pumps at the very bottom, then add the coffee after, then add--"
"ENOUGH!" Agent One interrupts. "We aren't getting youse coffee!"
Sylvester's ears flatten against his head in sadness. "Awww, man."
"Wow." Blitzo says. "I was getting massive douche chills just there, Mox. Congrats!"
Agent Two leans up close to Moxxie's face. "If we have to, we are willing to resort to torture methods to get answers outta you nasty hell beasts!"
Sylvester gains a shit eating grin. "Please do! Make sure to hit me extra hard!"
Agent Two and One glance at each other before looking back to the demons.
"When you say 'torture', do you mean physical or psychological?" Moxxie asks. "Physical seems counterproductive; we would likely tell you anything if it meant an end to the pain, and you would have no way of knowing what was true!"
"Or we might like it too much." Blitzo says as he smiles. "And then you've got a while new thing to deal with, like my dear fox friend here."
Agent One points accusatorily at Blitzo. "What do you mean by that?"
"Ah, you're stupid, huh? I can work with stupid. Daddy likey dummy."
Moxxie and Sylvester squirm in their chairs trying to hold back their laughter, but they laugh anyway.
Moxxie stomps his hoof on the floor as he laughs. "Good on, sir! 'Daddy likey'!"
"I'm enjoying this more than they are!" Sylvester laughs. "I've had way better torture than this!"
"You better stop laughin' at us!" Agent Two orders.
Agent One grabs Blitzo by the collar. "Yeah!" He pulls an amused Bltizo closer. "You are the ones at our mercy!"
"It's hard to resist, I'm really sorry." Moxxie apologizes. "I mean, considering your approach this far, you've had us tied here for what, hours? And you haven't even had us confirm what exactly we are!"
Agent Two leans down in curiosity. "What are you?"
"I'm a Virgo."
"I'm a Sagittarius." Sylvester says.
"HAH!" Blitzo laughs.
"Ohhh, smart guys, eh?!" Agent One says as he claps.
"One more quip outta either of you and we'll shut you up!" Agent Two threatens.
"Ooh, getting kinkyyy!" Blitzo smiles.
Sylvester looks at Agent Two up and down. "I mean, you ain't my type, but I'd still do ya."
Both agents recoil in shock in horror.
"WHAAAAT?!" Agent One shouts. "We aren't playin' into your vile demon kinks!"
"And I wouldn't dare touch you, you filthy beast!" Agent Two shouts.
"I mean, that's what it sounded like back there, you sickos!" Blitzo says with a smile.
"Please don't give them ideas, sir!" Moxxie says sarcastically.
"Why not? I know the shit you're into!"
Moxxie gets an embarrassed look.
"Stooop!" Agent One yells. We are-" He leans towards Moxxie, pointing. "NOT gettin' kinky wit youse!"
Agent Two grabs Agent one and pulls him back. "Calm down, One! Don't let these monsters get to you!"
The agents start to walk away.
"Heyyy, aren't we gonna get our phone call, bitch?" Bltizo says to Agent One as he walks by.
"Yeah, I gotta let Loona know to preheat my oven, I'm making turkey!"
"Well, that entirely depends!" Agent One states. "Who are you gonna call? Hmmm?" He asks Blitzo.
"Your fat mom, thankin' her for a fat time!" Blitzo says.
"Nice try, demon!" Agent Tow says. "His fat mom is dead!"
Agent one starts crying into his own arm.
Outside the building of D.H.O.R.K.S., the building that Blitzo, Sylvester and Moxxie are trapped in.
Two guards, armed with naginatas, stand outside the entrance. Four security cameras loom over their heads. Millie and Loona peek around the side of the building, looking for a way to sneak in.
"This where they ended up?" Millie asks.
"I think so." Loona says as she looks at the security. "Fuck, this looks intense. How are we gonna get in?"
Millie sees a small vent over their heads and points at it. "Lift me up to that vent!"
Loona raises her hand and Millie climbs up, opens the vent and crawls inside. She opens the side door from inside the building and lets Loona in. They sneak through the halls trying to find Moxxie, Sylvester, and Blitzo, completely unaware that an unnamed D.H.O.R.K.S. guard can see them on the surveillance camera. The guard spits out his coffee in surprise--unintentionally soaking another guard--and sounds an alarm to alert the other guards of the trespassers.
Loona screeches to a halt as a bunch of agents, holding several Japanese melee weapons, block her path. An agent holding a naginata runs toward Loona and Millie and swings it at them. The girls duck, avoiding the blade. Loona jumps, swings the axe, chopping off an agent's leg while Millie shoots him twice with twin pistols.
Loona throws the axe at another agent's face where it sticks. Millie climbs the agent's body and removes the ax from his head, jumps to avoid yet another guard's katana swing, then chops the katana-wielding agent in two vertically.
Loona runs into an agent with twin nunchaku and attempts to split kick him, but he avoids it. She then rolls back and jumps to avoid his strikes. An agent swings his kusarigama at Loona but Loona ducks low to the ground, allowing the nunchaku guy to be decapitated instead.
Millie sneaks up to the now surprised kusarigama-wielding agent and snaps his neck, and as he falls to the floor face first Loona grabs Millie who then grabs the axe from the floor, running towards another set of three agents inside a large doorway.
Over with the said agents, one of them hits a button, attempting to stop the girls by closing the blast door on them. The other two reveal their shuriken and proceed to throw them at the girls, though they miss entirely.
"Throw me!" Millie shouts and Loon throws her.
Holding her axe in front of her, Millie flies toward the group of agents, landing with a roll just as the blast door labeled "CAUTION BLAST DANGER" closes behind her. Screams of agony can be heard as Millie slaughters them. The blast door opens back up to show Millie surrounded by dismembered corpses and blood splattered on the walls and ceiling.
Loona walks into the room, impressed. "Damn! You're pretty agile for an old lady!"
"I'm like, five years older than you." Millie responds and follows after Loona.
Back with the two Imps and Fox.
Agent One yells at Blitzo while he responds by playfully sticking his tongue out at him. Sylvester is snickering with a shit eating grin.
"Stop insultin' my mother!" Agent One yells with tears in his eyes. "She's dead!"
"Hey, hey." Agent Two calms him down. "Let's just leave them here until they feel like talkin'."
The two agents exit the room, slamming the door behind them. Blitzo glances at the door just to be sure, then immediately tries to struggle in his bonds for a couple second before giving up.
Blitzo sighs. "Don't worry, Mox. Sylvie. If we keep being obnoxious, they'll eventually slip up and we'll get a chance to get out. Let's just keep fuckin' with the, until they get so frustrated, they stop thinkin' clearly. It usually works."
In the room next to them, everything Blitzo said was heard by the two agents. They watch them through a screen.
"Hmmm!" Agent One hums. "So, the demons wanna play games, huh? Well, we can play games..."
Agent Two chuckles and hits a button between "HAHA GAS" and "BITCH JUICE". As she lifts her fist away, to reveal a now glowing bright green button to be labeled "TRUTH BOMB".
"Heh!" Agent Two chuckles. "Yeeeah."
Back with the three demons.
Sylvester tries to bring his mouth down to the rope, but he can't reach so after a few seconds he gives up.
"I'm just worried about Millie." Moxxie states. "She'll be on her way by now, I'm sure."
"Ugh, she'll be fine, Moxxie." Blitzo informs. "It would take a roided-up hippo to take down that woman when she's upset."
"Yeah, y'know it takes a lot to scare me, but when Millie's mad. She kinda scares me." Sylvester states.
"We've never dealt with the human government before!" Moxxie shouts. "She's in danger!"
As they speak, a green gas begins filling the room.
Blitzo suddenly becomes angry. "Do you ever honestly shut up about Millie?! It's always-" Mockingly imitates Moxxie. "'Oh, how's Millie?" "I can't tonight. I'm hangin' with Millie!" "I'm so worried about Millie!" And she's ALWAYS... FIVE FUCKIN' FEET away from you! It's pathetic!"
"That... was oddly personal." Moxxie says.
"Even for you." Sylvester adds.
Blitzo becomes surprised. "Y'know, you're right! I don't know why the fuck I just let my guts spill like that."
Moxxie glances at the floor and sees green gas surrounding the two of them, eyes widening in fear. "Sir! They're filling this room with something!"
"Fuck!" Blitzo sniffs the air. "The hell is this?"
Sylvester sniffs the air and shivers. "I don't like this smell.
"I think it's some kind of airborne truth-telling serum!" Moxxie theorizes.
Sylvester deadpans. "That seems highly illogical."
"Well, Uh... Just ask me something specific I wouldn't normally tell you."
"Okay." Blitzo agrees. "Uh... Does Millie ever peg you?"
Moxxie smiles at the thought. Sometimes~" Sylvester lets out a laugh.
Moxxie's eyes widen in realization. "Wait! EWW! Fuck! Why that?!"
"Heh! I knew it." Blitzo says.
"You're really into some weird stuff Moxxie!" Sylvester laughs.
Moxxie glares. "Well, why do you never talk about your family!"
"Well, my father killed my grandpa when I was four, he cheated on my mother when I was around eight and had a bastard child. My mom gave birth to another kid just before she died when I was ten. Then my father performed an experiment on me that fucked up my head, but gave me a powerful ancient magic. I started drinking and smoking at the age of 13. I ran away from home at the age of 15 and became mercenary, then I met Blitzo and he saved my life." Sylvester spills his guts, then blinks a few times. "OH, FUCK YOU, Moxxie!"
"Wow, that was not at all what I was thinking."
"Oh, wow, way to hit home Moxxie!" Blitzo says.
"Well, your suit is tacky!" Moxxie flinches in regret. "Fuck! I'm sorry...."
Blitzo gasps dramatically. "How fuckin' dare you! Youuu have shitty taste in music!" He flinches in regret. "AH, I'm sorry."
"'Shit taste'?!" Moxxie tears up. "You said you liked that musical I recommended to you!"
"I lied! I left halfway through!"
"You... You said you loved it!"
"It was awful, Moxxie!" Blitzo says in tears. "It was about ugly, horny caaaats!"
"I feel like I can only be normal around you guys, along with Millie and Loona!" Sylvester says as tears start to form in his eyes. "I love you guys!" He starts to cry.
In the other room the demons are being watched by Agent One and Two.
Blitzo as tears flowing. "Oh, God. Moxxie! I've said so many lies to you!"
Agent Two chuckles. "This is gonna be a gooood night!"
Back inside the room.
Sylvester coughs and suddenly the room wobbles and distorts, change into a dark forest.
Sylvester gets up from his seat and the ropes fall off him.
"What the hell?" Sylvester looks around and all he sees is trees and darkness surrounding him. "Hello?"
Suddenly behind him something lights up in the distance and a group of trees move aside and create a path leading to it.
A female voice starts to sing from where the light is, but it seems to echo into the night, with a ghostly feel. The fur on Sylvester's arm and tail raise up and his ears flatten.
"Wolves asleep
Amidst the tree."
Sylvester turns around and looks into the distance where the light is.
"Bats all a-swaying
In the breeze."
"Hello?" Sylvester calls out as he walks towards the light.
"But one soul lies anxious
Wide Awake."
Sylvester looks to his right and sees a very large Wolf stalking him along the edge of the tree line. Sylvester shrinks a little and the wolf walks deeper into the forest, disappearing from sight.
"Fearing all manner of
Demons, Angles & ghosts."
Sylvester looks to his left and sees a figure hide behind a tree. Sylvester's heart begins to race.
"For your dolly polly
Sleep has Flown."
Birds fly through the threes and right past Sylvester, making him jump and he nearly falls over.
"Don't dare let her
Tremble alone"
A loud howl echoes in the distance and Sylvester whines. "This isn't funny."
"For the Fox
Heartless, cold
Paid in coin of gold"
Sylvester reaches around his shirt for his flintlock and he can't find it. He reaches his hand out for something, but nothing comes. "This is just great." His right eye looks around in worry.
"He comes, he'll go
Leave naught behind
But heartache
And Woe."
Sylvester looks to the forest again and he sees many pairs of eyes staring at him, and they suddenly disappear and a few bushes rustle along with the snapping of sticks.
"Deep, deep
Woe"
A light breeze blows through Sylvester, chilling him to the bone.
"la la la
la la la"
Sylvester looks up to the trees and sees many crows staring down at him with their beady red eyes.
"Birds are silent
For the night"
Sylvester looks in front of him and he's only about halfway to the light. "Damn."
"Cows turned in
As daylight dies."
A fox yelps in the distance, causing Sylvester to yelp. "Fuck this!" He grumbles to himself.
"But one soul lies anxious
Wide awake."
A ghostly wails travels through the forest.
"Fearing all manner of
Demons, Angles & ghosts."
Sylvester looks behind him and only sees complete darkness, but he sees something moving within it and he quickly looks away and to the front of him.
"My dear dolly polly
Shut your eyes."
A dark chuckles is heard behind Sylvester and he just keeps moving.
"Lie still, lie silent
Utter no cries."
Metal scraping against stone echoes within the dark forest.
"As the Fox
Brave & Bold
Pain in coin of gold."
The light grows ever so closer.
"He'll chop and slice you
Cut and dice you."
The smell of iron fulls Sylvester's nose.
"Eat you
Whole"
The last verse of the song keeps echoing as Sylvester makes his way to the light and he finally comes to it.
Sylvester stops in front of a small one story wooden cabin, with strange sounds echoing throughout the area. A low red glow surrounds the house.
Sylvester takes a deep breath and he enters the house.
As he enters the cabin and the smell of burning wood fills his nostrils as the crackling of a fire is heard.
"You've finally arrived." A female voice echoes throughout the house.
Sylvester walks into the living room, the floor board creaking under him. Sylvester then comes face to face with a near identical female version of him.
You are reading story One Helluva Fox at novel35.com
The female has a red right eye while her left is closed. She has black hair that's tied into uneven pony tails. She wears a crimson and black frilled dress, that's an elegant Gothic Lolita. On her head she wears a big crimson net bow to hold her hair. She also wears a red and black collar on her neck.
"It's been awhile, Zahav." The female Sylvester says.
Sylvester takes a step back. "I should have known."
The female gains an innocent look along with a smile. "Known what?"
"That this scary place would belong to you."
The female pouts. "But I'm trapped within your subconscious. So this place is your own mind."
"It's not like I wanted you in my head."
Sylvester's yellow and red eye stare into her blood red.
The female Sylvester chuckles. "I find it funny that the only friends you have, you treat them like shit."
Sylvester huffs. "It's not like you have any friends."
The female just smiles. "But you do, and you're so close to losing them. Maybe you would have more if you were nicer."
"If you weren't inside my head, maybe I would have been a nicer person."
The female doesn't say anything as she walks over to the fireplace. "Even though you were given my abilities, you refuse to use them." The female Sylvester walks around him.
"Because I don't need your power, I refuse to use something my father gave me."
"But it did save you from a slow and painful death." She puts a hand on his cheek. "We wouldn't want that, right."
Sylvester grabs her wrist and moves it away. "That almost would have been preferable."
"You say that, but look at all the friends you made, even though you treat them like shit." She sits down in a chair in front of Sylvester. "You are turning into your father."
Sylvester growls. "Don't compare me to him."
"You try to deny it, but you can't change fate. You're gonna end up exactly like him. It's in your blood."
"Then I shall change my fate."
The female Sylvester smirks. "Then I'll gladly watch that, but it seems our time is up. But do remember this, if you want to get out of there, you will have to use my power." A golden light shines under her left eye.
.
.
.
Millie and Loona walk up to a three-by-four 12 digit keypad. Millie walks closer and sees that the 1 button is the only one that shows any wear, while the other buttons are untouched.
"Try 1." Millie suggests.
Loona presses 1 five times. The door slides open, revealing a reception desk. The girls look to each other in affirmation and run inside. Millie vaults over the desk as the door slams shut behind them.
Back with the two demons. Now that their respective trips have worn off, they slowly wake up. Blitzo glances up to see that the truth gas is no longer being pumped into the room. The three are silent for a moment.
"Do you remember what you said to me after my first day with the company?" Moxxie asks.
"...Not really." Blitzo responds.
"I remember. You told me I did a good job and that you were proud to work with me. I feel like you wanted to say something more judgmental, but... you said that because I needed it... And it helped."
"Look, I'm hard on you, because I know what you're capable of, Mox. You care too much about what everyone thinks except for... me, because, y'know, my opinion is correct, but just... keep doing a good job. 'Kay? You shoot 'n kill good, you escape things easy... you can be strategic and cold-blooded when you need to, aaaand don’t expect any more compliments; I'm maxed out."
"Thank you, sir." Moxxie says.
"You know my name... Use it."
"Thanks, Blitzo."
Sylvester sighs. "I'm sorry guys."
"For what?" Blitzo asks.
"For treating you all like assholes. It's just... I've been sheltered all my life, that was until I ran away from home, so I never really knew how to act or anything. And in all honesty you guys were actually my first friends. And now I really don't want to lose that, I don't want to lose the bonds we've built up these past few years."
"I forgive you." Moxxie says.
"And so do I." Blitzo adds.
Sylvester sniffs. "This is enough to make a grown fox cry."
The three suddenly look up as they hear muffled pounding coming from the ceiling. Millie crashes through the ceiling, landing with a superhero pose, making the three trapped demons smile.
"THERE'S my Millie!" Moxxie says in excitement.
Millie runs to the three and unties them.
"Impressive work, Mills!" Blitzo says.
"But how'd you get here by yourself?" Sylvester asks.
Millie and Moxxie have a tender reunion but are rudely interrupted when Loona smashes through the one-way window using Agent Two as a makeshift battering ram.
"LOONIE?!" Blitzo yells.
Sylvester smiles. "Loona!"
"Get your asses out here before MORE FUCKERS SHOW UP!" Loona then points to Sylvester. "And you're in big trouble mister!" Sylvester blushes.
Loona throws Agent Two at Agent One as he stands behind her in shock. She crouches, wolf ears sprouting from her head, and leaps, having instantly reverted to her Hellhound form as she lands. A wolf howl sound effect plays as she lands. She drops her backpack and Blitzo and Moxxie grin maniacally at each other.
Moxxie pulls out twin submachine guns while Blitzo brandishes his trusty flintlock pistol, flicking the hammer. Sylvester grabs his flintlock and holds his hand out as his musket mysteriously appears in his hand.
Agent One weakly presses a button, setting off an alarm. The I.M.P group turn as a few disposable mooks drop from the ceiling holding Japanese weapons, before even more cartoonishly slide in from the sides and encircle them. The I.M.P. group hold fighting poses, ready for a smackdown.
"Oookay, I've had one too many emotions for today!" Blitzo states. "Guys..." He turns to Moxxie. "Let's fuck these fuckers up!"
"Oh, boy, fighting with a broken rib." Sylvester says.
Moxxie give an evil, toothy smile and nods. A fluid fight scene starts as one agent attempts to strike Blitzo with the sickle end of his kusarigama, only for Loona to catch it in her mouth and yank hard, throwing the wielder across the room to hit an agent with a katana.
A female agent attempts multiple strikes at Loona with her naginata, but Loona deftly dodges and, with the kusarigama sickle still in her mouth, stabs the agent through the throat. She releases the kusarigama and grabs the chain in her hands while running, wrapping it around another agent's neck and yanking hard enough to decapitate both him and the agent with the sickle end in her throat, sending both their heads flying.
As the two agents' severed heads fly, Millie jumps and twirls in the air with her axe and goes for an agent wielding a katana. He tries to block but is unsuccessful as the axe easily breaks through his sword and he is cleaved in half, splattering blood and brain matter around her. Millie sees an agent with a two-handed sword running toward her, so she runs up to him and dismembers him in two quick swings.
She uses her axe to deflect incoming shuriken and swings at their thrower, but he backflips away as another agent with a sword runs at her. She jumps and flips in the air and lands with a pose, then briefly clashes with the sword-wielding agent before taking off his entire lower half.
The shuriken thrower makes a second attempt, but he is easily cut down. She then happily runs off while spinning her axe as the agent she dismembered earlier is seen helplessly flailing his bleeding stumps.
Sylvester ducks under a sword and uses his musket to trip the guy, then puts his musket right to the guy's eye and fires.
Another agent tries to stab him with a naginata, but he kicks the weapon into the air and flips his musket into the air and grabs the barrel. He uses his musket like a bat and slams the stock of the gun into the agent's head,causing blood and teeth to fly as the agent slams into a wall.
A kusarigama stabs into his side and he growls, dropping his guns and grabs the chain connecting the weapon. He roughly pulls on the chain, causing the agent to fly towards him. The agent lands in front of Sylvester and he opens his mouth and bite down hard on the girl's neck, and then biting her head off.
Another agent runs at Sylvester with a katana, but gets kicked away by Loona. Sylvester turns around and the two stare into each other's eye. Then they come together and kiss.
"Oh, I love you Loona." Sylvester says as he puts a hand on her cheek.
"I love you two." Loona says back as she lovingly stares into his eye.
Two agents run at them and Sylvester hands her his flintlock and he holds up his musket in his other hand. "Shall we?"
Loona nods. "We shall."
The two aim the guns at the agents and fire onto them.
Moxxie and Blitzo are firing on a multitude of agents coming their way. Blitzo discards his flintlock pistol and reaches for the backpack.
"Mox! Cover me!" Blitzo orders.
"Yes, sir!" Moxxie responds.
Moxxie unloads his submachine guns in a wide arc, before disposing them as Blitzo hands him two golden revolvers that he uses to great effect. Blitzo, meanwhile, pulls out a vicious-looking knife and runs off, stabbing one agent to death while decapitating another.
"EAT! MY! ASS!" Blitzo yells.
Blitzo pulls out his phone and takes a selfie with the agent's severed head before throwing the head to the ground. Moxxie fires his revolvers until they're spent, then he viciously beats one agent to death with the butt of one before discarding them.
Blitzo picks up a demonic pump-action shotgun, fires off a shot, then hands it to Moxxie, who blasts two more agents with it. Blitzo shoulders the backpack so it sits on his chest. He and Moxxie turn to each other and nod before running in opposite directions, Moxxie making a demonic hiss as he does.
Bltizo joins Loona and Sylvester. He slithers up into Loona's hair and shoots an agent with a crossbow. One agent swings at her with a sword but she counters with a roundhouse kick to the face.
Sylvester elbows an agent in the gun then shoots them in the jaw. He ducks as Blitzo flies over him and into an agent trying to stab Sylvester.
Loona turns and delivers a powerful uppercut to the jaw of another sword-wielding agent, sending him into the air. An agent with twin sai comes at her and she crouches down before leaping towards him, biting down so his entire head is in her mouth. She briefly shakes him back and forth before throwing him and grabbing another agent by the face, slamming him to the floor.
Sylvester spin kicks an agent in the face, before grabbing their naginata and stabbing them in the cut, then cutting their head off. Sylvester turns around and throws the weapon at an agent trying to cut down Blitzo. Then he bites an incoming Agent in the face and rips off their head and kicks the body away.
Blitzo hands Loona an energy rifle of some sort, which she fires at a few agents
"DIE, MOTHERFUCKERS!" Loona yells then she looks down at Blitzo. "What?"
"I am just so damn proud of you two!" Blitzo hugs Sylvester and Loona, then he kisses their cheeks. "Bye, sweeties!"
Blitzo slithers off of Loona, who growls angrily at his affection. She then bites down on another agent's head and throws him. Sylvester headbutts an agent.
"What out!" Loona yells to Blitzo.
An agent, carrying nanchaku, runs at him but is blindsided and knocked away by the agent Loona just threw.
Blitzo turns to see Millie cut down two more agents with her axe and twirl it with a flourish.
"Hey, Mills!" Blitzo calls out.
"Hey, Bltizo!" She greets back. "Just one sec!"
Millie jumps and swings, decapitating one agent. She cuts a leg off of a female agent holding sai, relieves a male sai-wielding agent of his lower torso, then twirls her axe to completely eviscerate an agent holding a straight sword and poses. Blitzo appears to the side with the backpack still strapped to his chest and offers Millie a pump-action shotgun.
"Do you need a gun or anything?" Blitzo asks.
"Nah, I'm good!" Millie says.
Millie spins to the side, taking off the lower legs of a female agent with kusarigama then eviscerating her. She swings her axe as leverage for a leap onto another female agent, wrapping her legs around her neck and decapitating at least two more agents with the axe. Millie severs the leg of the agent she's held onto, who then collapses before Millie begins strangling her with her thighs.
Blitzo appears to the side again, this time offering a bottle of water. "How about some water?"
"Sure!" Millie aggrees.
Blitzo squeezes the bottle, squirting its contents into her open mouth.
"Ahhh." Millie snaps the agent's neck. "Thanks, Blitz!"
Blitzo throws the bottle away. "No problemy, Millie-Billie!"
As Millie runs off to murder even more agents, Blitzo pulls out a submachine gun and a shotgun. He gains a sadistic smile and his eyes are lightly glowing. "Now, who wants some quality time with Daddy?"
There are several more agents ready to kill. Blitzo spins his guns, runs at an agent with sai and leaps on him, firing at five agents with his shotgun before blasting the on he's grabbed onto. He leaps off and frontflips, killing two agents with the submachine gun.
Once he lands, he pulls a spiked baseball bat out of the backpack strapped to his chest, trips an agent with it, then beats him in the stomach with it. He pulls a grenade out of the backpack and uses the bat to hit it away into a group of hapless agents.
"FOOOORE!" Blitzo yells.
Agents One and Two are attempting to flee the building. Blitzo's grenade explodes, and they duck and cover their heads in fear. They then see the corpse of an agent hit the floor, a femur sticking out where his leg should be and his katana falling down and impaling him in the chest.
"Good God, why are we only usin' weapons from Japan's Edo Period?!" Agent One cries out.
Agent Two grabs Agent One by his suit. "Hey! The Edo period was badass, and you know it!"
"Dammit, you're right."
"LOOK OOOOOUT!"
Agent Two pulls Agent One down to the floor down with her as Loona turns around firing her energy rifle at more agents. Sylvester laughs and his right eye glows as he spins around, firing off his two runs at agents trying to run at him from all sides.
Agents One and Two pull themselves along the floor towards the exit. They are stopped by an agent's freshly severed head landing in front of them, courtesy of Millie.
An agent with twin nunchaku runs at her only for limbs and blood to spatter, one nunchaku-wielding arm comically flying up to the ceiling like a helicopter before falling to the floor. The agents turn and pull themselves another way as Loona shakes an agent back and forth in her mouth.
Sylvester grabs an Agent by the suit and proceeds to headbutt him until his face is all bloody.
Moxxie is standing on a pile of agents, blasting agent after agent with his shotgun and screaming bloody murder. He flips one agent into the air with his tail, causing him to spin, then he blasts him away. More agents run at him, only for Moxxie to fill them with buckshot.
"Biiiitches!" Moxxie yells.
Blitzo suddenly appears next to Moxxie. "Hey. Mox!" Startled, Moxxie drops his shotgun and it lands on hits buttstock, accidentally going off but hitting an agent in the crotch. The unfortunate agent weakly reaches a hand up at Moxxie. "Ohhh, wow. Really goin' for the dick there, ain'tcha?"
"Help..." The Agent weakly asks.
"Here, I got it for ya." Blitzo takes out the knife he used earlier and stabs the agent. "Now, hold this."
Blitzo places the backpack in Moxxie's arms and pulls from it a comically oversized rocket launcher appropriately named "MY DICK".
"Oh, yeah!" Blitzo yells. "I'm gettin' hard holdin' this motherfuker!"
Blitzo fires a rocket labeled "PUSSY DESTROYER" and gives an evil laugh. The rocket flies toward a group of agents on the other side of the broken window and explodes, causing both Millie, Sylvester, and Loona to flinch away from the flames. Millie's axe is also blown out of her hands by the blast. Moxxie then comes into view.
"Oh, crumbs! Is everyone okay?" Moxxie asks.
Sylvester puts a hand onto his bleeding side and gives a thumbs up. "Never felt better!"
Blitzo jumps onto Moxxie. "WOOOOOOO! How's THAT for demon scum!"
Past the broken window, with a few shards dripping blood. Agents One and Two hiding under a desk. Agent Two nods at Agent One, signaling him to hit a red button next to him aptly labeled '"RED BUTTON". This sets off an alarm and causes the place to be tinted red.
"Oh, shit! C'mon, fam! Let's blow this cocksicle join!" Blitzo orders.
Blitzo, Loona and Sylvester run for the exit. Millie hoists Moxxie off the ground and they join the rest of the group.
Before they can leave, the doors close in front of them. A set of iron bars lowers in front of the doors, then a garage door closes further down, then a large steel door clamps down, lasers activate outside of it, and bathroom doors close outside of that, the vacancy indicator switching to "Occupied"
"HEYi" Loona yells.
I.M.P. bang against the door.
Moxxie turns to Loona. "Quick! The book!"
Loona pulls out Stolas' Grimoire out of the backpack and attempts to read it. "Shhhit! I can't... I can't read the spell in this light! I can't see dick!" She looks around in worry.
Blitzo searches himself for more weapons but comes out empty-handed. "Well, shit. Looks like we've milked this weapon tit dry, and now we're out of badassery.
The silhouettes of Agent One and Two slide menacingly into view, along with a large group of agents behind them. Blitzo holds his arms out in front of his workers and family.
"Ha!" Agent Two laughs. "You demons aren't goin' anywhere now! Haaa!"
Sylvester chuckles, then he starts to laugh.
"Sylvester?" Loona questions.
"Looks like one went mad." Agent One says.
Sylvester walks in front of the group and looks back to them with a psychotic smile. "Don't intervene, I'm gonna buy us a few minutes."
"For what?" Blitzo asks.
"I don't know, reinforcements for us?"
"What are you gonna do?" Moxxie asks.
Sylvester licks his lips as he turns to the gang of agents in front of him. "I have one last trick up my sleeve." He closes his eye.
Tic
Tic
Tic
Tic
The sound of a clock echoes throughout the area.
"What is that?" Millie asks as she looks around.
"I've never wanted to use it, but I guess I have no choice." Sylvester say.
Sylvester opens both his eyes, his right one glowing a bright red and his left one... is a clock.
"It's just one of them, let's get him!" An Agent in the back yells.
Sylvester chuckles with a psychotic smile on his face.
"You don't understand the situation do you?" Sylvester asks. "I'll show you want a demon can do." He holds out his hands and his flintlock and Musket appear in them. Then he aims his musket to the sky. "Zafkiel!"
A clock dong is heard and a large clock appears behind Sylvester.
"This is what he's been hiding?" Moxxie asks.
Sylvester aims his flintlock at IV. "Dalet!" Black smoke enters his flintlock and the clock in his eye moves forward a bit. Then he aims his flintlock at his head and fires.
Sylvester wounds heal up and he smiles at the army of agents. "Don't want to fight injured. But now I'm ready for the fun to start."
"It's still just one!" An agent yells.
"I've got a bad feeling about this." Another Agent says.
Agent One and Two take a few steps back as the agents behind them run in front of them.
"Hmm, then let me give myself an advantage!" Sylvester laughs and he aims his flintlock at VI. "Hei!" Sylvester aims the flintlock at his head and fires. Then he aims his gun at I. "Aleph!" He aims the gun at his head and fires.
The clock in his eye moves a couple hours.
Sylvester licks his lips. "Time to get some of my time back!" He laughs manically.
"This Sylvester kinda scares me." Moxxie mutters.
"It's kinda hot." Loona blushes.
"It's badass!" Blitzo yells. "KICK THEIR ASS, SYLVIE!"
"Get em' so we can go home!" Millie yells.
Sylvester cracks his neck and smiles. "Let's begin!"
"Get hi-" An Agent starts, but Sylvester suddenly appears behind him and rips his throat out.
"Oh, shit!" Another Agent yells and he's kicked in the stomach and sent to the ground, where his balls get stomped on by Sylvester.
Sylvester twirls his musket around and deflect a few shurikens. He then smacks an Agent in the face with his musket then fires his two guns into the agent's head.
He ducks under a swing from a katana and kicks the weapon into the air and as it falls, he kicks the handle and the katana flies into the neck of the agent it came from.
An agent attempts multiple strikes on Sylvester with Sais, but he deftly dodges and slams her musket into the agent's throat and a loud crack is heard.
A kusarigama flies through the air, towards Sylvester's head, but he holds up his Musket and it wraps around it. Sylvester pulls his musket roughly, causing the agent to fly towards him. As the agent reaches Sylvester he kicks them in the gut and shoots them in the head, the body flies across the room.
Another Agent tries to stab Sylvester with a naginata, but he disappears and reappears behind her and bites into her neck. The throws her body into another agent, and he falls to the ground.
Sylvester then appears above the agent and stomps down onto his neck.
Sylvester takes a few heavy breathes and he ducks under a couple shurikens and he fires both his guns into her head.
Then he takes a step back as an agent attempts to slice him with a katana. Sylvester drops his flintlock and grabs the katana from the guy and stabs him in the gut.
Sylvester drops to floor as a Kusarigama slices through the air above him, he grabs his flintlock and fires into the agent that throw it.
Sweat falls down Sylvester's head as he takes deep breaths and slowly stands up.
Then a couple clicks is heard behind him.
"End of the line, dog!" Agent Two yells as she aims a pistol at him.
"You and your devious friends have caused a lot of damage!" Agent One yells as he also aims a gun at Sylvester.
Sylvester takes a few heavily breaths as his clock eye glows and his red eye glows.
Before the two agents can do anything, they begin noticing strange happenings around them. The I.M.P. gang's shadows growl and morph into meld into a hideous beast. A screen suddenly turns on flicker, rattling around aggressively before turning off, showing the agents' reflections and the four-eyed silhouette of a certain someone who wasn't there before. The agents are startled as the screen breaks off of the wall and falls at their feet and slides away. Two more screens then break off of the wall, and the rest shudder and display static.
"Finally." Sylvester mutters and his massive clock disappears.
"Who daaaares threaten... my impish little plaything?" Stolas asks from the shadows.
"Who said that?!" Agent One aims his pistol around.
The agents look at the floor, where bird-like footprints appear coming towards them. Another monitor bashes Agent One in the face, removing his shades and knocking him to the floor. He turns to look at Agent Two.
"Agent Two?" Agent One questions.
Agent Two's head is spasming, her red eyes wide and mouth slack in shock and horror. Around her dead bodies stand up, eyes completely black and empty. Agent Two tries to stop her head spasming with her hands but fails. The black-eyed bodies kneel. Agent One stands back up, his shades returned to his face, and attempts to approach Agent Two. She removes her own shades and her head twists around "The Exorcist" style to look at Agent One. She now has sharp teeth, bloodshot eyes, and her mascara has formed sharp streaks down her cheeks
Agent Two speaks with both a British accent and Stolas' voice. "What's the matter, demon hunter? never seen a REAL demon before?"
[The dead bodies draw Stolas’ summoning circle around Agent Two in their own blood, which is now dripping from their eyes and mouths. She chuckles maliciously, eye twitching and nose bleeding. Agent One looks on in terror as Agent Two's head whips back to its normal orientation. Her eyes have rolled back. She throws her head back and vomits shadowy sludge and feathers. Demented laughter can be heard in a variety of voices. Agent Two and the I.M.P. gang watch--Loona snapping a photo--as the shadows coalesce into a demonic, shadowy owl monster.
The shadow beast approaches the two agents, screaming and roaring at them as they huddle together out of sheer horror. The demon beast's essence pulls back and turns into Stolas, looking at the agents with disdain. He turns away from them and clicks a button, shutting off the alarm and the red light as well. The series of doors is heard opening. Stolas walks up to the gathered I.M.P. group, stopping in front of Blitzo.
Loona runs over to Sylvester and checks him over, before punting his arm around her shoulder and helping him up and over to the group.
"Stolas?" Blitzo questions. "Wha-... A- Wh- Hold on, how did you know that we needed help?"
"I have my ways, darling." Stolas states. "Are you alright?" He leans forward, gazing into Blitzo's eyes as he places a hand on his cheek. Blitzo rolls his eyes.
"Ugh. I'm fine, Stolas."
"Hm. Good." He says softly as he caresses Blitzo's head.
Stolas then pulls Blitzo's head in roughly and adopts a sharper, angrier tone. "How the FUCK... did you get caught by humans?! Are you little creatures not being careful up here?! You know, if you-" He boops Blitzo's nose. "-get in trouble, I get in trouble! We..." He grabs Blitzo's cheek. "Don't want that!"
Moxxie pulls Stolas' hand away from Bltizo's cheek. "They... caught us off guard, your highness."
"I got hit in the dick by a tranquilizer dart, and I still can't feel it!" Sylvester says.
"...Yeah, you can unclench your bird-puss, Stolas." Blitzo says. "It's not gonna happen again, 'kay?"
"Lucky for you..." He looks to Agent One and Two as they are holding each other, shaking in fear. "Most don't believe the word of demon-obsessed lunatics. They are seen as kooks!"
Stolas giggles and looks rather pleased with himself. "Kooks! Such a silly word!" He claps his hands together. "Now! Let us all return." Stolas opens a portal back to the I.M.P. office.
"Yes, please." Moxxie says. "I'd like to get back to the correct hellhole as soon as possible."
"I really want to sleep." Sylvester says as he yawns.
Moxxie hops through the portal and helps Millie through. Loona walks through, carrying Sylvester on her shoulder and looking at Stolas' Grimoire, and Stolas picks up Bltizo in a bridal carry.
"Am I going to get any thank you for the rescue, Blitzy?" Stolas asks.
"Well, I suppose you should." Blitzo says. "Want me to fuck your brains out tonight?"
"Very much so." Stolas leans in for a kiss.
Blitzo grabs the back of Stolas' head and pulls it back, causing him to blush. "Alright. But, you're keepin' quite, or I'm usin' those bear traps." Blitzo runs a finger down Stolas's face as he shudders with obvious pleasure, his feathers fluffing out.
"Ohhhh, please do~"
The two of them partake in a French kiss. The portal closes behind them. Agents One and Two watch as they leave.
"...So, what now?" Agent Two asks.
Agent One becomes excited as he stands up. "What now?!" He walks off. "We finally got the evidence we needed to be taken... seriously!"
Agent One walks over to a computer, pushing some rubble away before typing on the keyboard. Five monitors go from static to showing security camera footage of the events of the last few minutes. The first three monitors show footage of the I.M.P. crew slaughtering agents while the fourth shows Sylvester slaughtering Agents when he used his aceint powers.
While the fifth shows Stolas rearing over the cowering Agents One and Two in his demonic beast form before transforming into his normal form. Notably, all three of the monitors showing the I.M.P. crew are green while the footage of Sylvester's is golden and Stolas is red with a cracked camera lens. Agent Two walks up and the two agents put their shades back on, smiling confidently.
"Nobody in corporate is ignorin' this." Agent one chuckles victoriously.
The five screens go back to static one at a time, starting with the footage of Loona, followed by Millie, then Blitzo and Moxxie, Then Sylvester, who looks at the camera with a psychotic smile. Finally Stolas, who could be seen staring into the camera.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
02-10-2023
9182 words
You can find story with these keywords: One Helluva Fox, Read One Helluva Fox, One Helluva Fox novel, One Helluva Fox book, One Helluva Fox story, One Helluva Fox full, One Helluva Fox Latest Chapter