Chapter 91: Chapter 91

Ivy started packing not long after the conversation with Deng Xi. In the end, they had amassed quite a few things over the last year—Sun Fang’s shopping trips had been pretty frequent. The amount of clothes he had that he had not worn even once was staggering, now that he was forced to come face to face with it. So he and Ivy spent a whole weekend just splitting up which clothing they’d be taking with them, and what would be donated.

Sorting out the rest of the stuff would be taking even longer, but Sun Fang wasn’t as attached to the rest of the things he’d collected, so he allowed Ivy more control over that. Instead, he went around watching idol dramas on TV, trying to psyche himself up to call Mianmian and actually have that Proper Conversation that they needed to have already.

He hadn’t had finished gathering courage, yet.

It was just… having that Conversation would be final, in a way. And Sun Fang knew he needed that finality, that Mianmian and Deng Xi needed it, too, but he found now, on the cusp of making the call several times a day, that he really didn’t know what to say. How to act. What to do. 

With Mianmian, he had always had a degree of candidness that hadn’t been available for him with anyone else and yet now… had they lost that, at some point, he wondered? Had they already moved on and he had just failed to notice? Were they already done and he was just the idiot clinging to the past like a loser?

…He didn’t like those questions.

Licking his lips, he rose from his seat and wandered over to the table where his phone lay discarded. He picked it up, flicking it over and over in his hands, watching the sunlight dancing over the shiny screen. Worrying his lip even more, he unlocked the phone at last and browsed through his contact list. Furrowing his eyebrows, he thumbed the list down and up repeatedly, watching the names spin around.

Fuck, he couldn’t do it. Taking a deep breath and temporary closing his eyes, he then found Hua Xingyi’s contact and opened it up. The last text had been a simple is the packing going well question from Xingyi that Sun Fang had yet to respond to. Walking over to the closest armchair, Sun Fang plopped down and stared at his phone.

Going well! He sent to Xingyi, wondering if he should add an emoji but in the end ignoring it. Rather, he forcefully cut off the train of thought that wanted him to open up social media and bypass the block Ivy had installed on all his apps. But, no. He wasn’t going to do that. 

Hua Xingyi’s response came quickly; a nice I’m glad that didn’t really tell Sun Fang anything, but the sentiment was appreciated. He licked his lips again, pressing a hand to his eyes as he his foot began to tap on the floor. Glancing over his shoulder, he saw Ivy cataloging things in the corner, surrounded by a pile of boxes and a label-maker. Sun Fang eyed it for a moment, watching the careful way that Ivy handled the objects, the long lines of its body and the serene expression on its face as it dutifully sorted everything.

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Sighing, Sun Fang slumped back on his seat. He brushed a hand through his hair and asked Xingyi how are you today taking deep breaths and counting to ten to force his heartbeat to slow down. He only opened them when he felt some of the frantic energy running through him leach out through his breath.

Staring at the ceiling for a sightless moment, Sun Fang forced out another slow breath, his chest gently constricting. He was brought out it when his phone vibrated—a new message from Hua Xingyi. His lips twitched as he opened it, his eyes beginning to glitter a little. Xingyi’s message read had a photoshoot for a small magazine, it went really well! I’ll send you the photos when they come out :) and was followed by a picture of the sunset over the hills.

Sun Fang ducked his head a little and grinned to himself. He saved the photo, strangely pleased to have received something from Xingyi. He sent back many congratulations to Xingyi for the successful shoot, then finally dropped his phone. Standing up, he walked over to Ivy and plopped down on the floor beside it.

”How’s it going?” he asked, looking into the closest box. It was full of vases, though not the ones he had made himself. Rather, it was vases he had bought on shopping trips, old gifts from friends and family that he actually liked (even a few just from distant acquaintances). He eyed some of them, his gaze softening as he remembered all the flowers he’d put in them over the years.

Was he old? He didn’t feel old, but maybe he was.

”It’s going well,” Ivy responded, putting another vase in the box. It was lodged in there, surrounded by protective coverings, and securely fitted in between four others. Sun Fang poked at it—the things didn’t even twitch. He smiled quietly, pulling his hand back when Ivy gave him a look, and hummed freely to himself.

”Do you want to take a break?” Sun Fang asked, curious. He adjusted his seating position so that his feet were more comfortable, grimacing a little as the movement upset some of his muscles. 

Ivy shook its head. ”I’m almost done with this section. If you’re hungry, you can get a snack,” it said, not even sparing him a glance. Sun Fang pouted for a moment, but he wasn’t planning to bother Ivy when it was busy with something else. He didn’t want to be annoying, or interrupt it. Especially when Ivy was doing most of the work on its own.

Sun Fang stood up again, hesitated for a brief second, then ruffled Ivy’s silky hair. Ivy stilled under his touch, its body freezing, before it softly pressed into his hand. Sun Fang’s smile was so bright it hurt.

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