Chapter 169: Chapter 160: Coping

From what Regina could gather after listening to Via talking to Margaret and later to Kiara, and listening in to a few other people around the castle, almost a third of the nobles supporting Marquis Lyns had switched sides. She supposed she should be glad the number wasn’t even higher than that. And to be fair, it seemed to be concentrated among the lower-rank nobles.

Regina suspected that the rest was too afraid of being punished by the king for their previous betrayal. He was not exactly known as a paragon of virtue and magnanimity.

Ironically, her own alliance with Lyns’ rebels was probably also a factor. It offered at least a ray of hope for them, amidst the losses they had kept suffering. She knew perfectly well that many of them still didn’t think highly of her hive, but any allies were better than none, presumably.

Either way, it was hard for her to assess the extent and full effect of this move. It had clearly been coordinated to some degree; less so than it would have been with modern means, but more than without the System and magic.

Some of the nobles who’d tried to rejoin the king had been apprehended by Lyns’ loyalists (or did that make them counter-loyalists?), while some had managed to escape. In most cases, they’d taken at least the majority of their soldiers with them. There had been fighting even in the main army camp, although it had been quickly quelled. A substantially smaller percentage of people from domains whose lords had rejoined the king had participated in the fighting here. I suppose that’s obvious, Regina reflected. They were in the middle of Lyns’ army, clearly outnumbered. Of course they wouldn’t have been eager to attack their former comrades, no matter what their lord said.

While Via talked to various people in charge to help her figure all of that out, the rest of the drones started their work. They consulted with the human healers and quickly began healing patients. The local doctors seemed particularly happy about the herbs and supplies the drones had brought along. It was mainly what they’d gathered from the forest, and they’d mostly known about them from other humans in the first place, so there was nothing ground-breaking, but the army seemed to be running low.

None of the drones was as good at it as Regina, although a few had managed to level up their Basic Heal Spell. A few even had other healing magic. They generally didn’t show as much variety as the human healers, from what she could tell, but she didn’t get the impression that her drones were any weaker. Whether they were less or more useful was something she’d have to wait to find out.

She was also interested in what they were called on to treat. Call that professional curiosity. And it is useful to know that there aren’t as many infections as I’d feared. I wonder if that’s because of the System and their Constitution stats or because of better hygienic practices? Probably a bit of both.

The local healers were at least aware of the concept of infection and tried to keep their tools clean and sterile where possible. They mostly had to deal with injuries from combat, including some that were obviously caused by magic or Skills. There wasn’t really another reason for electrical burns to be a problem, for example. Or wounds that seemed self-inflicted. Regina took special notice of those, although they seemed to be quite rare, luckily. I guess I’m not the only person with some kind of psychic powers, she thought, feeling a chill go down her spine.

Well, maybe she was jumping to conclusions. Either way, Regina watched how her drones dealt with those injuries and felt like she was learning something. She was almost disappointed that she wasn’t there herself, not just for political reasons or to help. She wasn’t sure exactly how well she would have dealt with a few more exotic cases.

Maybe it was also some lingering frustration over her inability to heal June Lyns. It wasn’t like Regina didn’t have some guesses and a few possibilities of what disease she might suffer from, she just couldn’t be sure. She would need more time, to watch how her condition developed after Regina did some magic healing.

It was odd. She felt like a failure in a more personal way than she was used to. I shouldn’t expect to succeed in things like this right away, Regina thought. Maybe … I guess my medical knowledge and what I’ve inferred from it is a last connection to my past I can cling to. In some way, the last piece of my old self I’ve got left.

Regina sat bolt upright and felt her hands grow clammy as her heartbeat started to race. She was sitting in her bedroom, but her immersion in the psychic link had stopped.

She’d gotten used to the holes in her head, the missing pieces, the way her memory differed from what was normal. Almost, at least. But now, it felt like she almost had something. She was so close she could almost taste it, and yet, she knew she’d never get there. Unlike other Hive Queens in her situation, presumably, there wasn’t even any other way for her to learn about it, to ask others about who she had been. It was just as gone as the rest of her world. In her calmer moments, Regina realized that was probably a good thing.

There was no point dwelling on the past. Only what it could help her do in the present.

Regina exhaled forcefully and laid a hand against her chest, listening to her frantic heartbeat calming down. She could tell herself that she should just consider herself lucky to be alive all she wanted, but that didn’t make it easy. But she did have a life here. A home, a family … children.

Regina winced and quickly stood up, starting to pace around her room. I suppose I had more issues than I realized, she acknowledged to herself. Well, have more issues. This little episode took her by surprise. At least it wasn’t an actual panic attack or anything. With anyone else, I would have realized they couldn’t have gone through what they did without some trauma or at least lingering effects. Her lips twitched into a wry smile.

She had been pushing things away, trying not to think about it. To be fair, the enormity of her entire world being ravaged, reshaped and reset to the dark ages would be enough to crush anyone if you dwelled on it. She hadn’t even allowed herself to focus on the anger she felt for the … multidimensional refugees calling themselves gods who had led to it.

They were definitely responsible to some degree, although you could argue about fault. Considering what else they had done since then - or not done - Regina considered her anger to be pretty well justified, though.

This war against the gnomes, even the war in Cernlia … does it really matter, in the great scheme of things? She leaned against the wall, pushing her forehead against the cool clay, and sighed. Well, of course it does, if only because of what it means. Still, maybe I’ve allowed myself to lose sight of the bigger picture, missed the forest for the trees.

She’d been pretty passive so far. Just holed up in her nice little territory and built a little base. That was probably her Hive Queen instincts at work, urging her to prioritize building up her hive. When the gnomes had attacked, she’d prepared to fight back, but that was pretty much it. And to be fair, it wasn’t like those instincts were wrong, if it was really them; obviously, building up her hive was a priority.

It took a while for Regina to realize that all of this was not coming to the surface now at random. She tuned back into her drones at the marquis’ army’s camp, looking at the healers working. There were a few injuries that might have triggered some dim recognition. More than that, she vaguely felt a few of the human healers work another kind of magic that wasn’t as familiar to her as what her drones used. It took her a moment to realize that she seemed to be sensing most of this with her own senses, not just getting what the drones saw. Of course, she was still using them as a sort of focus, so that was a bit of an unclear distinction.

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Divine magic. Now that she’d noticed, it was pretty obvious. Some of them were clerics or otherwise using divine magic to heal. It felt … different than normal magic. And Regina had barely realized how much her sense of magic had grown in the first place. This was slightly different, though. She felt like she could almost pick out a few people who were praying to Alianais. It just had that kind of … flavor to it.

Regina closed her eyes again and dove deeper into her own magic, beyond the psychic link. She’d started being aware of the ‘mark’ the goddess had left on her a while ago, but now she wondered if something had changed. It was still more like tapping around in the dark trying to find the proverbial black cat, unfortunately. She was never sure if she’d actually found something where she expected it to, and this magic wasn’t very cooperative. Maybe she was even imagining the whole thing.

Regina opened her eyes and frowned to herself. Still, considering what’s happening now … She shook her head, then stood up, brushed off her clothes, and headed out of her private quarters. A few drones lingered in the vicinity, but she tried not to think about whether they’d noticed what she’d been doing, or feeling.

In the army camp, Via was just rejoining the other healer drones. She was actually one of their best healers, probably because she was one of the oldest from the Attendant Template. Unlike most of the others, she actually sought out and talked to the human healers, discussing various patients’ cases as well as more general methods. They seemed wary of her, but were at least courteous. Luckily, Regina didn’t see any flexing over who was the more competent doctor. Maybe the stress of a losing war had left people less inclined to worry about that kind of nonsense. Regina kept a metaphorical ear on their talk as she walked through the hive. All else aside, this was probably a good experience, and she did wish she was there personally to participate, but she could hardly just pack up and go haring off to the rebel army. Besides, she had things to do here in the hive.

To start, she contacted Max, who was currently leading a training session with a few other Warriors. Wrap up what you’re doing in a few hours, she said. I’m leaving soon, and I know you’ll want to come with me. We might be gone for a while, although I don’t think so.

She felt Max’s surprise. Where do you want to go? And can I take others along, as well? I’m not really comfortable with you just leaving with a single bodyguard, especially if it might be an extended absence.

Sure, you can take a few people, she replied. In the meantime, I’ve got a few letters to write, and I wanted to check something.

To that end, Regina contacted Jen, another of the Keepers. Her own handwriting was decent enough, but Jen could actually do something resembling calligraphy. That would be a bonus for official letters, at least according to some cultural elements, and it would make it easier to deny something actually came from her if she wanted to. She’d sign the letters once they were finished.

To be fair, she probably wouldn’t have needed to bother with that to write a message to Earl Whitor, especially since she’d have to have a drone drop it off somewhere it would hopefully get to him. But Regina just hadn’t wanted to sit still in her room right now, she preferred to be up and moving.

That letter was a bit of a shot in the dark, anyway. She wasn’t sure of the situation in the northern county. But it couldn’t hurt, and she did think the impressions of it she’d picked up were accurate.

While Jen wrote the letters according to her instructions, Regina descended into the lower levels of the hive’s main base. She passed through several corridors, steadily making her way deeper into the lower regions. Finally, she reached a cellar they had dug into the earth without bothering with much else. Regina pushed the door open, wincing as it creaked a little, and headed in.

Inside, she found several slabs of a clay-like material that actually came from the Production Drones, hardened but not smoothed out completely. On them lay shapes covered by scraps of fabric, mostly torn cloaks and the like. One of the Attendants had gotten some ice magic, and the ice he’d generated was piled up in the corners and around the walls, keeping the cellar cold.

One of the War Drones skittered around, changing position to watch Regina. She absently sent it a mental pat, the equivalent of a carry on, before she pushed the covering off the first shape, revealing the dead body of a gnome. Pretty intact, looks to have had his throat slashed, she assessed.

“My Queen?” someone asked, and she heard footsteps approaching down the corridor.

“Ace, good to see you,” she greeted him. “Help me pull a few of these into another room, will you? I’ve already sent someone to get some of my instruments.”

Luckily, they actually had a few sets of common medical instruments, mostly captured and traded for. Regina wasn’t exactly experienced at this, so not having to use any old dagger was good.

“Of course, my Queen,” Ace acknowledged. He frowned a bit even as he lifted the first body. “I take it you want to do an autopsy?”

“Yeah. Several, probably.” Regina shrugged. “The best way to learn about differences between them and humans, I think.”

He nodded. “Do you want us to get one of the live ones, too?”

Regina hesitated. “Let’s hold off on that for now,” she said. “I might still need all of them intact and healthy.”

She grabbed another body and followed Ace to a mostly empty chamber with a clean table. Then she gratefully took a cloth Ace handed her and wrapped it around the lower part of her face. Sometimes, better than human senses had their downsides, and this would stink.

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