Chapter 17: CH 17

When Pi Xiu came looking for Wen Xi, he saw him sitting on the swing, feeding the Rock Sugar Lotus Seed soup to Lil Broom, who was sitting on a low stool. Lil Broom was eating with a complicated expression on his face, while Wen Xi had a benevolent smile on his face.

But when Pi Xiu saw the large bowl in Wen Xi’s hands, Pi Xiu’s temple suddenly popped. Pi Xiu walked over, pointed to the bowl, and angrily asked: “If you were going to serve yourself such a big bowl of soup, wouldn’t it have been better to take a whole bucket?!”

“One bucket of soup would have been too much, I wouldn’t have been able to finish it.” Wen Xi looked at Pi Xiu with a smile and said: “The Lotus Seed Soup you cooked was so delicious that I couldn’t restrain myself from serving myself more. Fortunately, I have this child to eat with me.”

When Lil Broom saw Pi Xiu coming, Lil Broom grabbed the broom at his side and began to explain: “I, I fi-finished cle-cleaning be-before I, I ca-came to s-sit h-here.”

Pi Xiu: “It’s alright, I didn’t want you to clean this place to begin with. If you have nothing else to do, go read and practice calligraphy. Otherwise, if you don’t know how to answer the questions when you go to School in a few days, you will end up making a fuss saying that you don’t want to go to School again.”

As soon as Pi Xiu instructed Lil Broom to take the big bowl with him, Pi Xiu heard Wen Xi say behind him: “A while ago, I felt as if someone was observing me. But when I turned around, there was no one there.”

“Ah?” Upon hearing this, Pi Xiu turned around abruptly and released his demonic power to engulf the entire courtyard. This way, he would be able to see and sense any strange presences. However, once this was done, Pi Xiu was also unable to see or find anything out of the ordinary. The formation in the courtyard didn’t even emit any response.

Wen Xi looked at him and asked: “Do you think it was the Taotie who came over?”

“It’s quite possible.” Pi Xiu’s face darkened as he thought: ‘With Taotie’s way of sneaking around unnoticed, there’s a good chance it was that son of a bitch.’

Feeling rather uneasy, Wen Xi reached out to pull Pi Xiu’s arm and asked: “What should I do? Should I hide?”

“It’s alright, don’t be afraid. That idiot can’t beat me.” Pi Xiu looked at Wen Xi, who had a frightened appearance as he relied on him. Pi Xiu’s heart beat rapidly, but he soon managed to regain his calm as he patted his chest, reassuring Wen Xi that he would be fine.

Wen Xi looked at Pi Xiu, smiled, and nodded: “That’s good, but I’m still a bit scared. Besides….”

Wen Xi sighed, as if he wanted to say something, but hesitated to do so. Feeling impatient, Pi Xiu said: “If you have something to say, just say it. Stop beating around the bush.”

“Why do I feel that your waiters have some kind of problem with me?” Wen Xi frowned and sighed. “It seems that I have offended them in a way, but I don’t know why.”

Pi Xiu was stunned: “What happened?”

“It’s just, that kid tried to run away as soon as he saw me. When I called out to him, I questioned him for a long time until I found out that he was afraid of me because of something the Monkey Spirits said about me….”

Wen Xi then exposed the things that the Monkey Spirits had said behind his back, making it clear that it had to do with Pi Xiu. Once he finished speaking, Wen Xi cautiously glanced at Pi Xiu, only to see that Pi Xiu was looking at him with no expression whatsoever. Wen Xi’s heart was filled with fear at the same time as it thumped loudly. With an aggrieved expression, Wen Xi pitifully asked Pi Xiu: “Why are you looking at me like that?”

‘You ask me why am I looking at you like this? Of course, I’m looking at this little thing who dares to cleverly scheme in front of me.’

Pi Xiu knew that the Monkey Spirits enjoyed gossiping and badmouthing people behind their backs. He even knew that they occasionally scolded him by comparing him to Zhuo the Exploiter and Huang Shiren1. But Pi Xiu also knew that they would never dare to do anything else than just spewing a few words.

‘This little thing must have overheard the Monkey Spirits bad mouthing him behind his back, so he had no choice, but to come to me for support.’

Pi Xiu stared at him like this, silently, for so long that Wen Xi became frightened. In the end Wen Xi had no choice, but to lower his head and whisper: “If you don’t care, just forget it….”

“Who says I don’t care? I’ll take care of it tomorrow.” Pi Xiu laughed, extended a hand, and lifted Wen Xi up, taking him back inside. “I’ll teach them a lesson tomorrow.”

Although Wen Xi was happy, he had to pretend otherwise: “Don’t overdo it, I don’t think they did it with bad intentions.”

When Pi Xiu was about to reply, he felt the little thing leaned over to him to cool him down. In a good mood, Pi Xiu felt that this was kind of amusing, so he simply said: “You sure know how to behave like a good boy.”

…

The next day, at work, the five Monkey Waiters received a thoughtful gift from their Boss.

A “Guide of Self-Cultivation for Waiters”.

Not only that, but their Boss also ordered them to memorize the text and then recite it entirely.

The Monkey Spirits went crazy when they were informed of this, and with the book Su An handed to them in their hands, they asked why: “We set up stalls for the Boss! And we evaded the City Management2 for him! We are the backbone for the well-development of this Restaurant! And we are completely loyal to the Boss! Why are you doing this to us? Aren’t you afraid of being fined by the Animal Protection Agency?!”

Hou Er: “Could it be that the whining spirit snitched on us again?”

Hou San’s heart suddenly trembled: “Could he have overheard what Hou Er and Hou Si talked behind his back yesterday?”

‘There’s a saying that says, ‘If you have a stepmother, you will also have a stepfather3’. At first, I thought only Humans were like that, but who would have thought that even the Great Beast Pixiu couldn’t escape the pillow talk? He was so effectively persuaded, that he had even forgotten we once suffered through the years together!’

The Monkey Spirits wept bitterly while holding the book in their hands, lamenting: “Little cabbage on the yellow earth, it has lost its mother at the age of two or three~4”

When Su An saw them like this, it was hard not to feel a little bit sad for them, but it was for the sake of his long-time colleagues. Although Su An wanted to give them some words of comfort, he remembered the instructions his Boss gave him and made sure to repress his emotions.

After clearing his throat, Su An said: “Times are developing, and society is progressing. Even the service workers have to accept the call of modern times, learning to improve the quality of their service, as well as striving to make the Restaurant continue to grow, becoming more and more powerful. It has nothing to do with the fact that you guys have been badmouthing the Boss’s Wife behind his back.”

However, the more Su An explained, the more the Monkeys felt that everything was Wen Xi’s fault, the snitch.

But the situation had already reached a conclusive point. The winner was the King above all, while the losers had to memorize a book. One after another, the Monkeys took the book to their rooms to read it with their heads down, completely defeated.

Qiu Fu stood in the doorway and sighed: “Although Old Pi said they weren’t like an old house set on fire, if the little guy upstairs were to say anything else, even the name on the property certificate would have been changed.”

Ren Jiao burst out into laughter: “It’s not quite like that.” When Ren Jiao verified that there was no one in sight, he whispered: “Old Pi has long since wanted to make the Monkeys undergo service training. But since he knew that they wouldn’t want to change their attitude without a wage increase, he has delayed it until now.”

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Qiu Fu was taken aback, discovering that things weren’t as simple as he first thought.

“This time, Old Pi finally found the perfect opportunity to use the little guy upstairs as an excuse to get the Monkeys to study. Even if the Monkeys aren’t happy, they can’t complain to him. Besides, now that the Monkeys have been challenged, they will study the book with all their might. Old Pi just needs to wait and reap the benefits.”

Hearing this, Qiu Fu frowned and repeated the entire scene in his mind. Powerlessly smacking his lips, Qiu Fu said: “Old Pi sure is fierce, huh? No wonder he’s the Boss, while we’re just the cooks.”

“Hey, watch your words. I can be the Boss as well, I just gave up, OK?” Looking up at the sky, Ren Jiao said: “Although it’s good to be known as the King of Aquatic Products, selling seafood can also be considered as selling my own people. I’ve worked in this business for a long time, and I’ve always feared the Heavens might punish me for it.”

Qiu Fu laughed, but then regained his sour expression: “Isn’t the little guy upstairs too miserable? Old Pi used him as a target to shift the blame off himself. Does Old Pi even like that poor ghost?”

Ren Jiao shrugged and replied: “He should like him. Did you not see in the Monster Forum that the baby is said to be 3 months old already?”

“You dumbfuck! How can a man get pregnant? Even if he’s a Ghost, it’s still downright absurd.” Qiu Fu grunted. “I also think that group of Monkey Spirits should be disciplined. They keep talking nonsense all day long, and if they don’t stop their naughtiness, there will be trouble sooner than later.”

Noticing the time, Ren Jiao asked: “Ah, aren’t you going back to Qingqiu next week?”

“Yes.” When talking about going back home, Qiu Fu sighed again as he stroked his stiff black hair. “Don’t mention it, my head hurts just by thinking about it. Tell me, my old man already has eight or nine cubs, but why does he want me to come back home every single year?”

Ren Jiao replied: “Maybe because you were born different, and saw you growing up to be different as well. He’s more concerned about you.”

“Don’t even bring it up. When I was born, my father almost bit me to death thinking he had been cheated on with the black dog he always fought with from the opposite mountain.” Qiu Fu grimly lit a cigarette, but before he could take two puffs, he saw Pi Xiu walk in through the door with two large shopping bags.

Ren Jiao unconsciously looked at the sun outside, confirming that it hadn’t risen from the west. Then, he looked at the courtyard, confirming that there were no pigs flying in the sky.

‘Then, why the hell did Pi Xiu suddenly go shopping?!’

Qiu Fu: “What did you buy?”

Pi Xiu placed the bags on the ground, letting Qiu Fu and Ren Jiao see for themselves what it was. Once they opened the bags, they realized that inside were magic tools. Ren Jiao and Qiu Fu’s hearts pounded as they heard Pi Xiu say: “Today we won’t open the Restaurant because the three of us will strengthen the formation. Especially the backyard.”

Qiu Fu touched his head and said: “Why does it need to be strengthened, huh? The backyard is near the Farmers’ Vegetable Market. If you strengthen it again, it will be inconvenient for me to buy vegetables since I won’t be able to climb over the wall.”

Pi Xiu was stunned: “Fucking hell, the footprints I found once I finished painting the wall were yours?!”

“Forget the footprints, why do you suddenly want to strengthen the formation? Didn’t you do it a few years ago? Even the dogs peeing on the ground aren’t as diligent as you are.” Ren Jiao frowned. “Are you a loan shark out there behind our backs or have you offended someone?”

“No!” Pi Xiu shoved a bag to each of them and said: “It’s about Wen Xi. Yesterday, when he went to sit in the backyard, he told me that he felt as if someone was watching him on the other side of the wall. Wen Xi said this feeling of being observed appeared and disappeared as if it were a ghost, but I’m sure it was the Taotie.”

Pi Xiu sneered: “By strengthening the formation today, I’ll catch the turtle in a jar5. If I don’t catch it now, I fucking swear I’ll write my name upside down6!”

The three brothers7 closed the door of the Restaurant and went into the courtyard to begin the strengthening of the formation. Lil Broom, who was originally sweeping the grounds, was forced by Ren Jiao to sit on a chair. With a pile of snacks in his arms, Lil Broom simply sat there watching them work.

…

After another overnight lecture, Wen Xi laid in bed. However, even after a long time passed, he couldn’t fall asleep. It was all because he kept hearing a metallic noise coming from the floor below, accompanied by the sound of curses, incessantly buzzing in his ears.

Wen Xi picked up a pillow and squashed it against his head. Although he was able to reduce the sound a little, two minutes later, Jia Suzhen’s loud voice chaotically broke through the peace Wen Xi had managed to create in his mind.

Right when Wen Xi was about to get up, he felt that his body was unable to move, even noticing that he couldn’t open his eyes!

Astonished, Wen Xi couldn’t help but think: ‘Can Ghosts suffer from sleep paralysis?!’

At that moment, Wen Xi heard some tiny noises near his ear. At the same time, he felt something holding his exposed hands outside the quilt. The warm sensation made him shiver a little, as a cold sweat broke out on his back. However, he still couldn’t fully ‘wake up’ and move.

When Wen Xi felt as if someone had sat down on the edge of the bed, he seemed to hear a laugh, but at the same time, it was as if he didn’t hear a laugh at all. This feeling of uncertainty, of not knowing whether it was real or not, was the most frightening to him.

The sound of small voices kept echoing in his ears, making Wen Xi can’t help, but wonder: ‘Is it a Ghost that is pressing me onto the bed? What if it’s a lonely soul, a Fierce Ghost, a Mountain Spirit or a monster that came to cause trouble?’

No one said that a Ghost couldn’t be afraid of another Ghost, and the more Wen Xi thought about it, the more frightened he became. With his body covered in sweat from fear, Wen Xi finally managed to find his strength and violently sat up on the bed. With his eyes wide open, Wen Xi turned his head all over the room. Yet, no matter what, he wasn’t able to find anything strange or see anyone else present in the room.

Soon, the sound of Jia Suzhen’s voice was heard again, as well as the noise coming from the courtyard downstairs. Wen Xi was still a little dazed, not yet able to believe that he had just experienced sleep paralysis.

Wen Xi, while still sitting alone in the room, kept thinking about what had happened, which only made him feel more and more afraid. From one moment to another, Wen Xi hurried to pick clothes at random and dress as fast as he could. Then, with his hair still in a mess, he went downstairs to look for Pi Xiu.

Even though the old demon has him locked up, and was fond of touching him left and right, at least he’s still reliable. Apart from Pi Xiu, Wen Xi really cannot find anyone else to trust.

After sweating so much, the intense fragrance of his bones that were soaked in magic elements became heavier and more noticeable. Therefore, even though Wen Xi hadn’t yet reached the backyard, his scent had already been noticed by the people gathered there.

When Pi Xiu noticed Wen Xi’s smell, seeing him with disheveled hair and his face as pale as snow, Pi Xiu couldn’t help, but freeze in shock for a moment.

Qiu Fu, standing beside him, was frantically sniffing around. As he sniffed the air, Qiu Fu asked: “What’s this delicious smell? Can you smell it?”

Without his facial expression changing in the slightest, Pi Xiu blurted out: “I just farted.”

Qiu Fu’s face instantly darkened.

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