Chapter 22: Slime Slayers

In the noontime sun, Jyn came out of a dark alley. It had been exceedingly difficult for her to find one; most alleys were lit up with the sun directly overhead, so how was one to find a shadow to summon the shadow? She’d spent today’s good luck to finally find an alley with clotheslines strung to and fro, shading the ground below.

In her pocket was a letter with the Seal of the Inquisition. She waded through the filled street, reaching the plaza, where Kalender, Page, and Sherry were waiting. Some people milled about, while a squad of guards idly stood sentry in front of their barracks.

The Maid was glaring at Kalender for no discernible reason. Page had been trying to get her to stop, but “My danger sense is constantly going off” was her reasoning. Maybe it was the overly-miniscule amount of charm magic wafting off of Kalender? With six anti-charm cuffs, he shouldn’t be able to charm anyone even if he kissed them—though, that’d be a different type of charm altogether.

“Here,” Jyn handed the letter to Sherry. She received it with both hands and unfolded the contents.

“I see,” Sherry remarked. “Then, it is confirmed. I shall be joining you, if you would have me.”

A look of shock painted over the other three’s faces. Jyn took the letter back into her hands.

She faced Sherry. “Nothing here says anything about your joining us. What are you saying?”

“The truth is…” She revealed another letter, handing it to Jyn, who read it and handed it to Kalender, who read it and handed it to Page. “To find and recall Miss Page to her home was to be my last assignment in my service as Lord Turner’s Maid.”

“What? Do you have anywhere to go?” Page asked.

Sherry nodded. “I have family in Violentum. However, I wish to see some friends who had scattered about in recent years. It would be a surprise if you wouldn’t pass through a town or village with at least one of them on the way.” She gasped. “You don’t suppose I would be a burden, would you?”

The Maid had never mentioned anything, but everyone knew and felt that she was darned too powerful to be just a Maid.

Jyn sighed. “Please don’t flatter yourself overmuch.”

“I jest,” Sherry chuckled, but resumed a serious—more graceful posture. “Please, allow me to follow along for a while.”

The sincerity jarred them from the air of mischievousness just a while ago. The woman was simply too capable at controlling the atmosphere.

“One moment,” Page said, tugging Kalender and Jyn away by their hands. They huddled together for a dicussion some distance away from the Maid.

“What do you think?” Kalender asked.

“I’m only familiar with her, but I can’t really say I know her,” Page replied. “She’s always been on the capable side of things. Even if she’s a Maid, I have no idea what father tasks her with. Besides, mom might not be too happy about letting someone so high-leveled tag along with us.”

“High-leveled? What level is she?” Kalender asked.

“Thirty-one,” Jyn replied, getting a ‘Huh?!’ from Kalender. She continued. “It’s one thing if she were only to join us until a nearby town. It sounded as if she was joining us indefinitely. The Inquisition should know, at least.”

“So, we’ll only let her join if the Inquisition approves?” Kalender asked.

“That’s the most reasonable course of action, yes.”

Everyone agreed on it. They returned to Sherry, who was smiling oh-so-gracefully.

“By the way, I’d almost forgotten!” she said, bringing out yet another letter—with the Seal of the Inquisition.

The three gawked at it before Page finally took it and opened it. There, signed by Senior Inquisitor Djarren Yal himself, was an acknowledgement of Maid Sherry and her intent to “accompany” Kalender’s party.

Shady shit. Kalender and Page looked up to Sherry. I love it.

Jyn, meanwhile, connected the two dots in her mind: a Level 31 Combat Maid … with the sanction of the Inquisition. She sighed. She sighed really hard. Wasn’t a shadow enough? They now even had a Combat Maid following them around, too? Maybe the shadow had skills that restricted her to operate in towns and cities. Someone like Sherry, who could openly follow them around, wouldn’t be as constrained.

She couldn’t bring herself to trust Sherry. On the other hand, they now had ridiculous firepower in their party.

Speaking of, their Level range became ridiculous, going from 1 all the way to 31. Adding Jyn’s, Page’s, and Kalender’s Levels all together wouldn’t even amount to Sherry’s. That needed fixing.

“Come on. Let’s go to the field east of here,” Jyn called.

“Ah? I didn’t know we were leaving so soon!” Sherry remarked.

“We are not. Page and Kalender must train. They are Level 6 and 1, respectively.”

“Huh? But, my equipment?” Page asked.

“I’ve got ’em, don’t worry,” Kalender replied. He was lugging around a decently-heavy rucksack—but no quarterstaff in sight.

“But where’s my—” “It’s inside, don’t worry,” Kalender pre-empted. His reply puzzled Page, who was acutely aware of the fact that meters-long quarterstaves did not fit in rucksacks. Kalender, however, made it so that her quarterstaff could be disassembled in three sections.

For the moment, they started walking to the east gate—a narrow sally gate like the west gate. On the way, Kalender and Sherry helped Page put on her armor. The thing had dozens of straps, but that just meant that it wouldn’t come loose easily. The bulk of it was made of boiled leather, but there were also steel plate inserts over the vitals.

Kalender also gave her her utility knife and a solid steel baton. Either one was considered okay to carry inside towns, as long as they were openly carried in a sheathe, scabbard, or wrapped in cloth.

Quarterstaves were of the same case, but Kalender was afraid that he’d accidentally made something that looked too fancy to be called one.

They cleared the gate, coming out to a downslope that overlooked a grassy field. There were winding foot trails where the grass remained low—prime ambush habitat for snakes and slimes.

It was generally a beginner adventurer’s job to keep the fields around the town clear of slimes, not to mention protecting the farmlands to the north and south. When there weren’t enough adventurers, the town guard would do the job, instead.

This afternoon, there were a few groups of young lasses hacking at the grass—probably at small slimes. The group stopped well behind the anti-slime frontlines to talk strategy.

“I’ll wait here and enjoy the afternoon,” Sherry declared. She’d already placed down a picnic cloth and prepared a tea set and a basket of sandwiches. Nobody remembered her ever bringing a basket of sandwiches, nor the tea set, nor anything for that matter. She was even still in her maid outfit!

Not that they needed to worry about her. They could imagine that the slimes in the area would simply vaporize upon contact with her Maid Aura—Maidric Aura?

“Well. That’s that,” Kalender said. He started unpacking Page’s quarterstaff.

“Slimes are like water balloons,” Jyn explained. “Bash them hard enough and they will be killed. A glancing spark will cause their skin to burst into flames.”

“How about the materials?” Page asked. She’d read about it before, but slimes’ thin, rubbery skins could be traded. They didn’t have much use besides repair work for clothing, however.

“Don’t bother,” Jyn replied. “This is mainly combat training, so kill as many as you can. I’ll simply follow you around in case a pack of wolves appear.”

“And that’s—done! Page, look!” Kalender waved her over. She looked at the weapon up and down. It was definitely still a staff, but there were two metal couplings that split it into thirds. The first thing about it was the wooden box attached to the middle, about the size of a small box of dominoes. It wasn’t all that heavy, so it didn’t feel like it was intended to add heft behind a strike—although it did throw the balance of the weapon around a little.

“What’s that?” she asked.

Kalender put on a smug face. “You know how magic weapons have a magic circle on them so you can do stuff like shooting bullets?”

“Uh-huh?”

“Haven’t you ever wondered why there’s only one of them on a weapon?”

“Uh… huh?”

Even Jyn had to pause and wonder. “Why is that?” she asked. If you were a soldier and you needed anything other than a fire bullet, you’d just chant it, so there was never a real reason to put more than one magic circle on a weapon.

“Because!” Kalender lifted up the staff. “For some reason! Magic thinks you’re transmitting MP through the whole weapon!”

Well. Of course. That makes intuitive sense. As a combat professional, Jyn would prefer to think in such a way. Who would want to empower only a part of the weapon?

“But if you do that and there’s more than one magic circle, all of them get activated!”

"“Oh.”" No one’s ever tried it nor seen it, but they could imagine it happening.

Even Sherry, still nearby, had taken to listening to Kalender’s explanations of things. She was a Combat Maid, first and foremost, so she only saw magic as a weapon and tool. She also finally understood, most clearly, why the Inquisition was interested in Kalender.

He wasn’t just a Cursed One looking to fight against the curse. He was also a Reincarnator who came from another world, and thus, had a high chance of ushering in new developments. The Inquisition would happily be at the forefront of these developments—to benefit from it first, or to quash its spread if need be.

“So anyway, I split up the magic circles so that—”

“Sorry, what?” Jyn blurted. “You split the magic circles?”

Ah. Right. Kalender was a programmer. Splitting up code was a normal thing. That sort of thinking wasn’t what one would find in a fantasy world.

“I-I made one big circle into several smaller circles—”

“No, no, I understood the implication.” Jyn massaged her temples. “And then?”

“Ah, well, if you look at the box here, it’s actually a stack of wooden pieces—”

Each piece was a rectangle the size of two thumbs side-by-side.

"—Each one has its own magic circle. If you’re holding the quarterstaff in front of you, you should see the rearmost piece and its magic circle through the viewport here.

“When you put MP in the staff, it’ll activate the magic circle that’s facing you. If you reorder the pieces…” He slotted out the rearmost slate and put it in front, which pushed a new piece into position. “It shoots out different magic!”

Although everyone was at different levels of amazement, Jyn still had the mind to gauge the actual usefulness of the weapon. The process of reordering the stack of wooden pieces was slow, so it wasn’t the sort of thing you could adjust smack in the middle of combat. It would be decent for backliners who have some breathing room, though.

“It might be better to remove the box entirely,” Jyn suggested. “It is too slow to change to new magics, and the box makes the staff unbalanced and strange to handle in melee. Page should keep the pieces on her person, and slot in new ones when needed.”

“Huh.” Kalender’s mood and inventor’s pride had been dampened, but Jyn was the experienced fighter between them. “Hmm. I’ll work on that when we get back.”

“Won’t you be tired?”

“Ah, nah.” Kalender waved the notion away. “It’ll just be a few minutes.”

“Just a few minutes, he says…” Jyn shook her head. That’s too fast! … I’m just almost happy he listened to me, however.

[+1 Respect]

They shared a look. Kalender solemnly nodded. Jyn just smiled.

***

A crow landed in front of Sherry. She removed a message capsule from it and rewarded the crow with a bit of cheap jewelry. The mission hadn’t changed.

Meanwhile, the trio of Jyn, Kalender, and Page set off to hunt down some slimes. There was an opening between two adventurer parties where they could slot right in.

“There, in the grass.” Jyn pointed. Kalender and Page looked, but there was nothing there.

"“Where?”"

“Imagine an overly-large dew drop—though I suppose that’s exactly what it is…”

The training pair squinted.

"“It’s somehow cute.”"

It was a translucent, fist-sized thing with the consistency of a water balloon, inching its way over a patch of grass which folded under its weight.

“What does it even eat?” Kalender asked.

“It’s like a weed,” Jyn replied. “It sucks up moisture and nutrients wherever it goes, hence why it is considered an agricultural pest.”

She then pointed to several patches of dead grass. “See there? There are likely hundreds of slimes in this area alone.”

It’s nice they’re easy to defeat. As Kalender thought that, Page poked the slime and it deflated. It just … died right there.

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“It’s not yet dead. You have to rip through its skin, else it will reinflate anew,” Jyn remarked.

Okay, so it’s not dead. These critters were incredibly hardy, apparently. The deflation thing was kinda like a reverse pufferfish defense mechanism, cutely enough. Hopefully it didn’t have neurotoxins or anything on its body, though.

Page jabbed the deflated skin, to which Jyn declared that it still wasn’t dead. The rubbery skin was apparently difficult to rip through when the slime was deflated like this.

“Use a blade on it or set it on fire,” Jyn said.

Kalender looked to Page. “Hey, try the firestarter spell in the staff?”

Page fiddled with the stack of spells, finally finding the piece with the firestarter magic circle on it. Above the magic circle was a carved glyph of the Lyrican characters for “fire maker,” which people just generally understood as “firestarter.”

She jabbed the business end of the staff, marked by a short, red ribbon fluttering around, and put MP into the staff.

The slime combusted.

“Great,” Jyn remarked. “Another 500 of those and you’ll level up.”

“Seriously?” Page asked. Scanning 100 documents would get her to her next level faster than that.

“Is there an XP system or something?” Kalender asked.

“Obviously,” Jyn replied. “It should be in your status.”

Kalender didn’t recall seeing any of the sort, so he pulled up his stats.

***

Name: Kalender
Age: 17
Occupation: Champion of Reincarnation
Lvl. 1 Human
HP: <ERROR>
MP: 10/10

[Skills]

All-Language Fluency (MAX)
Interpersonal Bubble (1/10)
Access Collection (1/1) (Temp)

[Companions]

Minimine (Flagged)
Vice-Goddess of Reincarnation
Affection: 68

Jyn (Sworn)
Knight of Lyrica
Lvl. 11 Human
Respect: 151
Companion Skills: Stand as Equals (1/5).

Page Turner (Flagged)
Librarian of Lyrica
Lvl. 6 Human
Excitement: 33
Companion Skills: N/A

[Blessings]

[Blessing of Reincarnation: Champion]
You have been chosen as a Champion of the Domain of Reincarnation. It’s like being a Hero, but a little bit more flexible on the work hours. You gain immediate access to magic, and you level up immediately each time you defeat an opponent 5 levels higher than yourself; the standard XP system is locked from you. Gain additional skill points per level.

[Blessing of the ###### God: Like Moths to a Flame]
…

***

Yep. “I don’t have it,” he finally said, “but I figured out why.”

Before he could say anything, however, there was screaming.

The trio grouped themselves, with Jyn positioning herself to the front. Kalender and Page took to looking out for the source of the scream.

“The adventurers to our left!” Page shouted. The party she eyed was retreating. One of them spared a moment to wave in their direction, pointing towards the place they were just in.

She managed to make out the adventurer shouting “It’s a big one!” before they were too far away to hear.

Page turned to the others. “She said it’s a … big one…”

She saw Kalender and Jyn gawking at something over her shoulder. She turned around once more and saw a slime that shouldn’t be that big.

It was so big that it was making a slimy sound. If anyone suggested that it could probably swallow a carriage, no one would object. Instead of being a translucent water balloon, it had a deep, dirty color like swampwater.

“I’m half-tempted not to kill it,” Kalender said. Jyn grunted in affirmation. A slime of that size belonged in a zoo.

It’s not like slimes were terribly dangerous. They were just really slow and annoyingly numerous. However…

“It must be killed,” Jyn said. “Slimes’ slime trails also function as their reproductive organ. A slime of that size left for too long in a nutrient-rich area such as here will cause a slime outbreak.”

Page herself was mentally blanked out, all save for one thought: We’re fighting a rare enemy right off the bat! Oh my gods.

[+5 Excitement]

Before Kalender and Page could unleash their magic, Jyn continued. “It must be absolutely killed in one blow. Large slimes develop aggressive instincts and excrete poisons from their skin. The worst of it is…”

"“Is?”"

“They can jump.”

Ah. There it is. The classic slime attack.

The larger the slime, the more potent the poison, and the thicker the skin. Something like a slime the size of a basketball will make someone’s skin go numb just from touching them. One the size of a barrel will, left untreated, kill someone within a few minutes just from casual contact. One the size of a carriage such as this would likely kill anyone near-instantly. Coupled with their increased mobility from leaping around, and they become a force to be reckoned with at close range.

Of course, humans have no such range restriction.

The mega-slime was still 100 meters away, and it was moving mega-slowly, and it remained mega-flammable. As long as their opening salvo of fire magic hit it, it would be fine.

“Kalender, teach me your volley preparation spell. When we’re ready, I will fire a salvo of five fireballs, and the both of you will spend half of your MP to rapidly shoot flame bullets.”

“Uh, sure,” Kalender nodded. “Five fireballs, right? I guess holding out two hands will do it. {Prepare five balls of flame}.”

“Alright. {Prepare five balls of flame}. Did I get it right?”

Kalender gave a thumbs up. Page was just a little jealous of Jyn’s incredible learning rate.

“How about ‘Shoot all’?” “{Shoot all}.” “Thank you.”

Jyn led the two to circle around and position themselves closer to the town, getting on a slightly higher elevation than the slime. As soon as they were ready, they each lined up their palms, finger guns, and not-quarterstaves at the forbidden water cushion.

“{Prepare five balls of flame}.”

Five fireballs, each the size of a basketball, manifested in a halo in front of Jyn’s open palms. Seeing this, Kalender got a better idea of why she said that fireballs were almost always overkill—they each looked pretty angry and would constitute a count of arson each. Compared to her, what did he and Page have to contribute?

Jyn would be dumping 25 MP straight into the mega-slime, while he and Page would be shooting 5 and 6 MP worth of bullets each—which was already a lot, considering that a palm-shot fire bullet only ate up 0.2 MP, though Page’s required 0.3 MP each when fired from her staff. A little bit of math suggests a total of 55 fire bullets shot between the two of them.

It seemed a little lopsided, but what were 55 bullets compared to 5 hand grenades blowing up all at once?

He shook his head. “{Prepare 25 bullets of flame}.”

Page looked to Kalender. He noticed her jealous face and smiled. “I’ll make something that does this for you.”

[+5 Excitement]

Kalender chuckled—though he really wanted to know what made Page get so much of her stat, compared to Jyn’s slower buildup of Respect over time.

He shook his head one last time. This was the moment of truth. Page rested her staff over her shoulder to get a more stable shooting position. Jyn was sure of her aim.

“Match my timing! Three! Two! One! {Shoot all}.”

“{Shoot 10 per second}.”

Page willed chunks of MP into her staff, 0.3 MP at a time. The activation was as fast as ordinary, managing two to three shots per second. Compared to her, Kalender’s phenomenal rate of fire was dizzying to the people of this world.

Nothing topped the scorched earth that Jyn delivered.

[+10 Excitement]

Four out of the five fireballs spread over the mega-slime and stuck to its skin, giving it a glowing coat of yellow and red. It rapidly charred, and its movement dulled. The fire spilled over to the grass around it, serving only as further fuel—catalyzed vengeance, fueled by its own life, against the slime’s and its brethren’s nutrient-sapping massacre of the local vegetation.

A barrage of bullets hit it all at the same time, keeping up the temperature.

Not a second later, the slime jumped.

It arced up into the air, reaching a height of 10 meters, before landing about 20 meters from its initial spot with a disgusting squish, coming closer to them. Practically most of its skin had become a crust, but its “foot” remained unscathed.

“Switch to explosive!” Jyn shouted. The skin must have been extraordinarily thick to form a black carbon crust that insulated the rest of the skin from both the temperature and oxygen necessary for combustion.

In that case, they would break through it.

Her Leadership kicked in, a multifaceted skill, one feature of which gave her a sense of how her party was doing. Kalender remained mostly composed, though confused. Why confused? Well, at least he wasn’t panicking. Page, however, was excitedly panicking—a state which she hadn’t known could exist before today.

As for the reason for Kalender’s confusion…

[+1 Excitement] [+1 Excitement] [+1 Excitement]

… such mass-production of Excitement was flooding his notifications.

She learned Page was in mental trouble. “Page! Switch to explosive or earth! We will give you time!”

Kalender winced. At 1 MP each, explosive bullets used five times more MP than fire bullets, but if Jyn thought it was necessary, then he’d just have to have better aim. At 80 meters between them and the slime, bullets traveled far too slowly against an enemy that was now on-alert.

He held out two finger guns. “{Prepare nine bullets of explosion, each}!”

He began firing. Explosive pellets shot for 0.25 MP, but more importantly, the projectile speed was instantaneous, each shot connecting almost immediately after each {Shoot}, each ending in a bang like a firecracker, simultaneously gouging out its carbonized skin in black plumes and burning the skin underneath, eventually revealing a final layer of slimy membrane.

It lept again, making him miss several shots. Even so, Kalender didn’t let up. Even while it was in mid-air, he traced its trajectory in his mind. More carbon crust broke off with each shot, and vile fluids poured out like a fountain of thin blood as it reached the apex of its arc.

As soon as it landed, it was apparent that it was angry, the disgusting sounds it had been making becoming more and more pronounced. 60 meters between them.

It lept again. 40 meters between them. The slime took notable time preparing for its next leap, leaving it vulnerable—but Kalender had run out of bullets, and was down to just under 1 MP. He couldn’t cast any magic anymore. Depression now would make him a liability.

Page took up the slack, firing off explosive bullets at 0.7 MP each, allowing for 8 shots with her remaining 6 MP. She blasted off more of its charred skin, and more fluids spilled from the slime. It lept, causing Page to miss her last shot.

20 meters between them. It was staring down at them.

Then it exploded.

The explosion was enough to knock the air from Page’s and Kalender’s lungs. They instinctively threw themselves onto the ground, but looking up from where they laid, they saw Jyn putting her hands down.

“Let’s wait for its remnants to burn down,” she said, looking not at the burning, deflating carcass, but at the Maid smiling and waving hello from across the field.